Born to Run (Part 12/29)
Title: Born to Run
Part: 12/29
Pairings: Sergio Ramos/Fernando Torres, Iker Casillas/Cesc Fábregas (kinda)
Rating: NC-17 from here on out just to be safe.
Disclaimer: Tragically untrue.
Summary: Tramps like us, baby we were born to run.
one. two. three. four. five. six. seven. eight. nine. ten. eleven.
"Holy fuck, it's so hot back here." Fernando writhes around on the mattress, completely stripped except for his underwear and this time, it's not to try and entice Sergio. He groans after mere seconds of silence and turns over onto his belly and worms his way closer to the driver's seat and therefore Iker. "Daddyyy. It's hoooot."
Iker snorts and rolls his eyes and he glances back to look at Fernando who is now kneeling pitifully on the mattress just behind his seat, his mohawk for once completely lifeless, sweat glinting at his temple and down his neck and chest. Iker forces himself to look away and he grips the wheel harder.
"What do you expect me to do about it? Cut a hole in the wall back there?"
Fernando whines and he pushes closer and rests his forehead on Iker's shoulder and Iker has to admit that he melts a little inside. He sighs and drops the back of his head against the top of Fernando's, his eyes dropped so he can still watch the road (though not safely).
"I'm bored."
Iker laughs and lifts his head again, turning his windshield wipers up higher as the rain intensifies and he rubs at his eyes, so, so tired of driving but christ, they have so far to go, they're only now through DC and just now into Virginia, no specific route in mind but he knows what his hands are doing, what his fingers are doing when he takes certain exits. He knows where he will end up and he will not let himself think about it. Not yet.
"I thought you said you were hot, kid?"
"Come lay with me. 'M bored and Magic 'n' the new kid are dead asleep. It'll be good for you, c'mon. Pleeeease?"
"Nando, it's only seven. I want to at least get halfway through Virginia before we stop tonight."
"I found some Jolly Ranchers back here! They're cheeerry." Fernando digs his nails into the back of Iker's hair and scratches at his scalp and goddamn, it feels good, it feels good enough to make Iker grunt and to drive shivers up his spine and goosebumps up his arms.
"Ah, stop it! Makin' me get goosebumps. And you'd better not be eating those Jolly Ranchers. They're probably full of crack or something."
"Ooooh." Fernando swivels his head toward the back of the van, deep in thought now and Iker groans dramatically, deciding that here was as good a place as any to take a break. He pulls over next to the small river he's been following, the van squeaking and arguing the whole way but it makes it. He rolls to a stop and turns the van off, whining again because his eyes hurt, his head hurts, his hands hurt, his back hurts. He sighs into his hands and Fernando's pulling at him again, insistent hands and Iker knows better by now than to fight him. He climbs into the back of the van and collapses down on the mattress, his body protesting entirely too much for him to be so young. Cesc and Sergio sleep on, at either side of the mattress from each other and Fernando is kneeling in the center, his eyes bright and on Iker like Iker is a new toy to play with. Iker sprawls out on the mattress and he grunts when Fernando shoves him to turn over, shoves him until Iker is laying on his stomach and Fernando climbs on his back, wrestling with Iker's shirt to push it off and Iker is alarmed at his sudden lack of control over this. He tries to fight back against Fernando but Fernando throws his shirt aside finally and when he plants his hands on Iker's shoulders and squeezes, all the fight leaves Iker's body and he collapses against the mattress, boneless and achy and oh, god.
"Oh, God." He closes his eyes and grits his teeth as Fernando's hands pull and push at his tired muscles and he stays tense for at least the first couple of minutes and then he sighs, turning his head this way and that so Fernando can rub his neck and then down his poor back. Fernando smirks to himself as he rubs Iker's arms, tending to muscles that have apparently never been massaged and Iker is full-out moaning now and he nearly sobs when Fernando presses the heels of his hands up Iker's back, popping the bones of his spine and relief floods his body, making him immobile and almost post-orgasmic. Tears sting his eyes and he feels stupid that within ten minutes, he's been undone by some river rat of a boy in his underwear perched on his ass, young, strong hands on his body, turning him to putty. He feels Fernando pulling at him again and this time he doesn't fight as he's turned to lay on his back and Fernando is tucking up into the crook of one arm and his mouth finds Iker's flawlessly, kissing at him with a demanding little mouth.
Iker turns onto his side so that he has a little leverage and he rests a hand on Fernando's cheek to slow him down so that they kiss softly and Fernando feels so suddenly young and small that it breaks Iker's heart. He turns over even more and halfway traps Fernando beneath his body and he slips his tongue into Fernando's mouth as a sort of experiment of tenderness and he literally feels the give in Fernando, the slight submission of his body and he deepens the kiss then, turning them completely over so that he can press him down into the mattress, the rain beating hard overhead as they slide against each other, fingers threaded together high over their heads and hanging over the edge of the mattress, bodies digging in some sort of primal urgency, their mouths in a silken war. Fernando pulls his mouth away suddenly and pants against Iker's ear, his fingers tightening between Iker's, nails digging between his knuckles.
"Harder."
Iker rubs down against him with his full body weight, moving faster because Fernando's breath against his ear is deafening and gorgeous and he feels his body tense and his breath get caught in his throat as he comes and Iker shivers for the jolt and quake of his body, he kisses down Fernando's neck very gently until Fernando is nuzzling him like a sweaty, spent little kitten, his fingers rubbing the back of Iker's hands and their mouths meet again in smiles and they kiss one last time, lightly.
"That was incredibly easy. You weren't bored, you were just hard up."
Fernando grins and it's almost shy and it makes Iker grin from ear to ear.
"Sergio is killing me."
He shoves Iker off of him gently and Iker falls to the side, jostling Cesc a little but Cesc just grumbles and squishes harder against the side of the van. They turn in to face each other and Iker strokes Fernando's sweaty hair off his face.
"You can't treat him like you have everyone else. He's different."
"I know that. I mean." Fernando sighs and it's through his nostrils and rather adorable frustration. "I can tell that. I just... I don't know what to do about that! I ain't never been with nobody special! The specialest I ever got was a girl back in Texas with six fingers on each hand!"
Iker laughs and Fernando gives him a wry grin but his eyes are wide, pleading. Iker tucks his hair back and then works on the hair at the back of Fernando's neck.
"Treat him like you would if you... like you actually got the one thing you always wanted for Christmas."
Fernando nods slowly, the analogy perfect for him, for a poor kid who never got nothin'.
"Like the most precious thing I ever got."
"And like you need to always keep it safe and make sure it doesn't get broken or scratched up or lost. Keep it in your safest place. That's Sergio."
Fernando searches Iker's eyes in silence, his mouth drawn into a frown as he thinks. And then,
"Do you think he could ever love me?"
Iker feels his chest tighten and he can hear Sergio breathing behind him and he feels absolutely frantic for him suddenly. His hand is paused on Fernando's cheek and Fernando sees the torment in his eyes because he pushes close to him suddenly, tucking in against his chest and hiding from Iker's eyes.
"It's okay. I don't blame him. I wouldn't love me neither."
"No." Iker's voice is firm and he wraps his arms around Fernando, crushing him against himself and he aches, he just fucking aches. "No, that's not what I meant. Of course he could love you. Fuck, he already does. It just hurts sometimes, I guess."
Fernando is quiet and his eyes are wet and his face is against Iker's chest and he has never felt arms around him like this before, never felt safe in this particular way.
"Cause you love him, too?"
Iker draws in a long breath and he sighs and it's such a powerful sound that it drowns out the rain for a minute.
"Yeah. Yeah, I love him, too. It makes me feel... helpless sometimes. And like a teenage girl. Or maybe like I'm a thousand years old and he's what's kept me alive for so long. God. I don't know. I just don't know."
"Do you hate me? For tryin' to make him love me, too?"
"No." Iker smiles and he softens his arms so that he can crane down and kiss Fernando's forehead and he keeps his lips there, smiling against his skin. "I don't blame you for that at all."
"I ain't never been a boyfriend before."
Iker smiles even more and he gives Fernando a squeeze that's ticklish somehow and makes Fernando wriggle in his arms.
"Are you gonna ask him to go see a movie? Hold his hand during the scary parts? Try to cop a feel in the car in front of house?"
Iker grunts as Fernando tickles him in the tight trap of their bodies and they both laugh.
"I might show him a puppet show with a coupla my socks and take him out to the crick so he can go swimmin' cause that's all he's talked about today. And then maybe I'd ask him to let me look at him under the stars again cause he was so..." Fernando trails off again and he fights with himself for a minute, clearly tormented by words and Iker holds him tighter. "Beautiful the other night, next to that fire, under all those stars. Do you know what I mean?"
"I know what you mean." Iker is solemn and he smiles because he can feel Sergio's breath on his neck and it's changed. He's awake.
"It's like he was a part of all of it, like he was the thing that brought all of it together or somethin' and I was just lucky to be there, I guess. Lucky he let me just lay down next to him and hold him and kiss him."
Sergio shifts behind him and Iker turns to lay on his back, exposing Fernando for Sergio who is moving over Iker almost like he's not there but in the end Sergio curls up with his back to Iker so that he can get to Fernando, he curls up between the two of them and wraps his arms around Fernando's neck and kisses him. Fernando's face is absolutely on fire but he pulls Sergio to him in so much earnestness and he actually moans, a vulnerable, soft sound and Iker wraps his arms around Sergio's stomach, pushing his face against his neck and just listening to them, to their soft, wet mouths and damp skin, just feeling Sergio breathe and feeling Fernando's hands grapple on his dark skin, trying to hold onto any part of him. Iker kisses at Sergio's neck and Sergio is almost quaking between them, so shy with what he wants and both Iker and Fernando can feel it but Iker can't bring himself to complete the thought, can't truly imagine it ever happening because it would end him, it would absolutely end him. Iker pulls away and leans up onto his elbow, delving between their warring mouths with his own to lick at their tongues for a second, for a guilty, thrilling second and then he's gone, crawling to the back of the van and opening the door to step out into the blessedly cool air, the wind around him absolutely refreshing and he stands there for just a minute, his eyes closed, head tipped up, letting the rain soak him, letting it wet his glasses, letting it obliterate every single thing else in his mind and the tiredness of his body and he almost sinks down into the wet earth right then, almost curls down to sleep there because it seems like it would be comforting, it seems like as much of a home as he can have right now and those boys, all three of them in that van in there, are tearing him into pieces.
Sergio keeps his eyes open as Fernando kisses at his mouth, as he kisses down Sergio's naked chest. He can't stop touching Fernando's hair, his high cheekbones, the freckles he can feel under his fingertips and his palms, that seem to be making his skin tingle. Fernando kisses at the skin over Sergio's heart, over and over, obsessively and reverently and Sergio curls down over him and sighs, kissing at Fernando's hairline until Fernando's mouth quietens just a little, still kissing but it's softer, fuller-mouthed, wetter.
"Mm." Sergio licks his lips as he listens to the sound of Fernando's and his eyes fall closed finally. He smiles and his arms are wrapped around Fernando's head, holding it close. "What do you feel?"
"I feel..." Fernando licks at the slightly raw skin he's marking now, his hands planted on the small of Sergio's back and he sighs very quietly. "I feel like I ain't never felt before. I feel like maybe I could be somethin' else with you, maybe be somethin' else for you even. I don't know what you done to me but I can't stop thinkin' about you, not even for one second. All I ever wanna do is touch you." Fernando draws in a breath and the air is composed of the scent of Sergio's skin and his heart skips. He kisses that very same skin again and Sergio has to hold back a whimper. "I feel your heart right here under my mouth and I just can't even believe you're lettin' me do this. I can't even believe you ever talked to me or wanted to help me and I most 'specially can't believe that you ever'd wanna care about me maybe."
Sergio dips down until he can find Fernando's mouth again and he's kissing him so gently, his own mouth tender with the need to convey emotion and he knows, he absolutely knows that Fernando can feel it because he's trembling, he's licking into Fernando's mouth and his breath is shuddering on his cheeks.
"I'm lucky to know you, Fernando. I'm supposed to know you."
Fernando lifts his head and his eyes are bright with emotion and he smiles at him.
"You really think so?"
Sergio smiles and they drop their foreheads together, hands settling so that their hearts can start to settle, too.
"I know so."
Cesc sits up and he yawns loudly just in case there was any confusion on the state of his wakefulness. He stretches his arms over his head and grunts when he settles again. He reaches up to scratch at his crazy bed (mattress?) hair and squints out the open backdoors of the van at Iker standing there, completely soaked by rain and now looking in at Cesc because he'd heard him yawn. Cesc hurries to lay back down, to curl up and face Fernando's back (he hates the smell of the corners of the van, the unknown, sticky dirt smell that is not his and so he wants no part of it). He closes his eyes just as Iker's weight enters the van again and Fernando and Sergio are lost in their own world, lost in each other's mouths and limbs. Cesc feels Iker pause and it's a loaded pause, it's one of consideration and his own body is tense waiting for the decision, waiting for the rejection though he's going to fight whatever decision Iker makes anyway. He feels his warmth and then the startling coldness of his clothes and his skin and when Iker's arms wrap around him he shoves weakly against him, grunting in such a way that he sounds sleep-heavy and it just makes Iker hold him tighter which is exactly what he wants.
"Stop it. You're soaking wet."
Iker grunts right back and he nestles his head against Cesc's shoulder and sucks in the smell of him that is so new, that is entirely different than Fernando and most definitely different than Sergio (Fernando is stale cigarettes and motor oil somehow, Sergio is sun-baked warmth and the faint smell of church incense, or of cinnamon maybe). Cesc smells like something intangibly youthful, like grass in the way of grass stains and maybe having to mow the lawn and right there beneath his ear, like lemons, something sticky sweet and heady and something he'd brought from home, something no amount of sweat or soap could wash away. He shoves at Iker again but it's weaker this time and Iker kisses at the lemonade spot, his nose buried and Cesc makes a low, whining sound.
"Now I'm cold."
"No, you're not. Shh, just lay still. You were having nightmares earlier." Iker grins against his skin and squeezes him and Cesc smirks as he pushes against him and it's all just flirtatious now.
"I was not."
"You were, too. And you said 'Oh, Iker, you big strong man, come and hold me and make me feel safe so I can sleep again. You're the only man who makes me feel so good.' I mean, you basically said that. More or less. Maybe with a few more moans."
Cesc laughs outright and he pushes at Iker with his forearms but Iker just pushes him back against the side of the van.
"That is an outright lie. Cause I don't sleep. I physically cannot go to sleep. There's something in my body that doesn't let me sleep. My doctor said I'm lucky if I live past thirty."
Iker just blinks at him in surprise and Sergio sucks softly at Fernando's neck, sensing a blatant lie from a mile away and so he doesn't even react. Fernando squints at Cesc.
"You got a doctor?"
Cesc's eyes widen and he stammers just for a minute before shrugging, fighting again against Iker's grip because it was much easier.
"I'm going to catch pneumonia! You're seriously soaking wet!"
"I bet he tastes good." Fernando waggles his eyebrows at Sergio before turning to face Iker's back, nuzzling up under his hair and licking rain from his neck, finding that he tasted absolutely wonderful, like sweat and summer rain and like the sun and so he smiles and licks again. Sergio leans over Fernando and kisses Iker's bicep, licking at his arm shyly but he's smiling, too, brave enough to be silly when Fernando's around.
"He tastes like summer."
"Yeah, that's it! Exactly, Magic." They grin at each other and keep kissing him, doing it ticklishly enough to make Iker squirm and this time it's him fighting against the bodies of all three boys and Cesc, because Iker doesn't want him to now, is holding on tight.
"You all'd better stop it! I mean it! Shit!" He starts to laugh when Cesc sucks at a strand of his hair, his cheeks on fire and he's helpless surrounded by them, absolutely helpless. "Unless you want me to do something we'd all regret, you better stop!"
Fernando quirks an eyebrow.
"Ooh, like what?"
Iker pushes at them and Fernando and Sergio turn him over until he's on his back and they tuck in against him and against each other, too somehow though Cesc remains curled up against Iker and Iker is holding him as best as he can. Cesc pretends to sigh loudly and he nestles down against Iker's shoulder, his eyes closing again and he's smiling secretly.
"Never you mind that."
"Are you gonna go to sleep, Screech? Dream about fuckin' all three of us on this mattress?"
Iker's face turns a deep shade of red but he closes his eyes, trying to pretend that Fernando's words don't affect him. He strokes the top of Cesc's head and rests his cheek on top of Sergio's, knowing that the arm around his chest is Fernando's because of how skinny it is.
"Dream? That'd be a nightmare."
Fernando smirks to himself but doesn't reply because the rain has started up again and the door is still cracked and letting in a delicious breeze and they're packed together and tired and, somehow, happy.
chapter thirteen.
Part: 12/29
Pairings: Sergio Ramos/Fernando Torres, Iker Casillas/Cesc Fábregas (kinda)
Rating: NC-17 from here on out just to be safe.
Disclaimer: Tragically untrue.
Summary: Tramps like us, baby we were born to run.
one. two. three. four. five. six. seven. eight. nine. ten. eleven.
"Holy fuck, it's so hot back here." Fernando writhes around on the mattress, completely stripped except for his underwear and this time, it's not to try and entice Sergio. He groans after mere seconds of silence and turns over onto his belly and worms his way closer to the driver's seat and therefore Iker. "Daddyyy. It's hoooot."
Iker snorts and rolls his eyes and he glances back to look at Fernando who is now kneeling pitifully on the mattress just behind his seat, his mohawk for once completely lifeless, sweat glinting at his temple and down his neck and chest. Iker forces himself to look away and he grips the wheel harder.
"What do you expect me to do about it? Cut a hole in the wall back there?"
Fernando whines and he pushes closer and rests his forehead on Iker's shoulder and Iker has to admit that he melts a little inside. He sighs and drops the back of his head against the top of Fernando's, his eyes dropped so he can still watch the road (though not safely).
"I'm bored."
Iker laughs and lifts his head again, turning his windshield wipers up higher as the rain intensifies and he rubs at his eyes, so, so tired of driving but christ, they have so far to go, they're only now through DC and just now into Virginia, no specific route in mind but he knows what his hands are doing, what his fingers are doing when he takes certain exits. He knows where he will end up and he will not let himself think about it. Not yet.
"I thought you said you were hot, kid?"
"Come lay with me. 'M bored and Magic 'n' the new kid are dead asleep. It'll be good for you, c'mon. Pleeeease?"
"Nando, it's only seven. I want to at least get halfway through Virginia before we stop tonight."
"I found some Jolly Ranchers back here! They're cheeerry." Fernando digs his nails into the back of Iker's hair and scratches at his scalp and goddamn, it feels good, it feels good enough to make Iker grunt and to drive shivers up his spine and goosebumps up his arms.
"Ah, stop it! Makin' me get goosebumps. And you'd better not be eating those Jolly Ranchers. They're probably full of crack or something."
"Ooooh." Fernando swivels his head toward the back of the van, deep in thought now and Iker groans dramatically, deciding that here was as good a place as any to take a break. He pulls over next to the small river he's been following, the van squeaking and arguing the whole way but it makes it. He rolls to a stop and turns the van off, whining again because his eyes hurt, his head hurts, his hands hurt, his back hurts. He sighs into his hands and Fernando's pulling at him again, insistent hands and Iker knows better by now than to fight him. He climbs into the back of the van and collapses down on the mattress, his body protesting entirely too much for him to be so young. Cesc and Sergio sleep on, at either side of the mattress from each other and Fernando is kneeling in the center, his eyes bright and on Iker like Iker is a new toy to play with. Iker sprawls out on the mattress and he grunts when Fernando shoves him to turn over, shoves him until Iker is laying on his stomach and Fernando climbs on his back, wrestling with Iker's shirt to push it off and Iker is alarmed at his sudden lack of control over this. He tries to fight back against Fernando but Fernando throws his shirt aside finally and when he plants his hands on Iker's shoulders and squeezes, all the fight leaves Iker's body and he collapses against the mattress, boneless and achy and oh, god.
"Oh, God." He closes his eyes and grits his teeth as Fernando's hands pull and push at his tired muscles and he stays tense for at least the first couple of minutes and then he sighs, turning his head this way and that so Fernando can rub his neck and then down his poor back. Fernando smirks to himself as he rubs Iker's arms, tending to muscles that have apparently never been massaged and Iker is full-out moaning now and he nearly sobs when Fernando presses the heels of his hands up Iker's back, popping the bones of his spine and relief floods his body, making him immobile and almost post-orgasmic. Tears sting his eyes and he feels stupid that within ten minutes, he's been undone by some river rat of a boy in his underwear perched on his ass, young, strong hands on his body, turning him to putty. He feels Fernando pulling at him again and this time he doesn't fight as he's turned to lay on his back and Fernando is tucking up into the crook of one arm and his mouth finds Iker's flawlessly, kissing at him with a demanding little mouth.
Iker turns onto his side so that he has a little leverage and he rests a hand on Fernando's cheek to slow him down so that they kiss softly and Fernando feels so suddenly young and small that it breaks Iker's heart. He turns over even more and halfway traps Fernando beneath his body and he slips his tongue into Fernando's mouth as a sort of experiment of tenderness and he literally feels the give in Fernando, the slight submission of his body and he deepens the kiss then, turning them completely over so that he can press him down into the mattress, the rain beating hard overhead as they slide against each other, fingers threaded together high over their heads and hanging over the edge of the mattress, bodies digging in some sort of primal urgency, their mouths in a silken war. Fernando pulls his mouth away suddenly and pants against Iker's ear, his fingers tightening between Iker's, nails digging between his knuckles.
"Harder."
Iker rubs down against him with his full body weight, moving faster because Fernando's breath against his ear is deafening and gorgeous and he feels his body tense and his breath get caught in his throat as he comes and Iker shivers for the jolt and quake of his body, he kisses down Fernando's neck very gently until Fernando is nuzzling him like a sweaty, spent little kitten, his fingers rubbing the back of Iker's hands and their mouths meet again in smiles and they kiss one last time, lightly.
"That was incredibly easy. You weren't bored, you were just hard up."
Fernando grins and it's almost shy and it makes Iker grin from ear to ear.
"Sergio is killing me."
He shoves Iker off of him gently and Iker falls to the side, jostling Cesc a little but Cesc just grumbles and squishes harder against the side of the van. They turn in to face each other and Iker strokes Fernando's sweaty hair off his face.
"You can't treat him like you have everyone else. He's different."
"I know that. I mean." Fernando sighs and it's through his nostrils and rather adorable frustration. "I can tell that. I just... I don't know what to do about that! I ain't never been with nobody special! The specialest I ever got was a girl back in Texas with six fingers on each hand!"
Iker laughs and Fernando gives him a wry grin but his eyes are wide, pleading. Iker tucks his hair back and then works on the hair at the back of Fernando's neck.
"Treat him like you would if you... like you actually got the one thing you always wanted for Christmas."
Fernando nods slowly, the analogy perfect for him, for a poor kid who never got nothin'.
"Like the most precious thing I ever got."
"And like you need to always keep it safe and make sure it doesn't get broken or scratched up or lost. Keep it in your safest place. That's Sergio."
Fernando searches Iker's eyes in silence, his mouth drawn into a frown as he thinks. And then,
"Do you think he could ever love me?"
Iker feels his chest tighten and he can hear Sergio breathing behind him and he feels absolutely frantic for him suddenly. His hand is paused on Fernando's cheek and Fernando sees the torment in his eyes because he pushes close to him suddenly, tucking in against his chest and hiding from Iker's eyes.
"It's okay. I don't blame him. I wouldn't love me neither."
"No." Iker's voice is firm and he wraps his arms around Fernando, crushing him against himself and he aches, he just fucking aches. "No, that's not what I meant. Of course he could love you. Fuck, he already does. It just hurts sometimes, I guess."
Fernando is quiet and his eyes are wet and his face is against Iker's chest and he has never felt arms around him like this before, never felt safe in this particular way.
"Cause you love him, too?"
Iker draws in a long breath and he sighs and it's such a powerful sound that it drowns out the rain for a minute.
"Yeah. Yeah, I love him, too. It makes me feel... helpless sometimes. And like a teenage girl. Or maybe like I'm a thousand years old and he's what's kept me alive for so long. God. I don't know. I just don't know."
"Do you hate me? For tryin' to make him love me, too?"
"No." Iker smiles and he softens his arms so that he can crane down and kiss Fernando's forehead and he keeps his lips there, smiling against his skin. "I don't blame you for that at all."
"I ain't never been a boyfriend before."
Iker smiles even more and he gives Fernando a squeeze that's ticklish somehow and makes Fernando wriggle in his arms.
"Are you gonna ask him to go see a movie? Hold his hand during the scary parts? Try to cop a feel in the car in front of house?"
Iker grunts as Fernando tickles him in the tight trap of their bodies and they both laugh.
"I might show him a puppet show with a coupla my socks and take him out to the crick so he can go swimmin' cause that's all he's talked about today. And then maybe I'd ask him to let me look at him under the stars again cause he was so..." Fernando trails off again and he fights with himself for a minute, clearly tormented by words and Iker holds him tighter. "Beautiful the other night, next to that fire, under all those stars. Do you know what I mean?"
"I know what you mean." Iker is solemn and he smiles because he can feel Sergio's breath on his neck and it's changed. He's awake.
"It's like he was a part of all of it, like he was the thing that brought all of it together or somethin' and I was just lucky to be there, I guess. Lucky he let me just lay down next to him and hold him and kiss him."
Sergio shifts behind him and Iker turns to lay on his back, exposing Fernando for Sergio who is moving over Iker almost like he's not there but in the end Sergio curls up with his back to Iker so that he can get to Fernando, he curls up between the two of them and wraps his arms around Fernando's neck and kisses him. Fernando's face is absolutely on fire but he pulls Sergio to him in so much earnestness and he actually moans, a vulnerable, soft sound and Iker wraps his arms around Sergio's stomach, pushing his face against his neck and just listening to them, to their soft, wet mouths and damp skin, just feeling Sergio breathe and feeling Fernando's hands grapple on his dark skin, trying to hold onto any part of him. Iker kisses at Sergio's neck and Sergio is almost quaking between them, so shy with what he wants and both Iker and Fernando can feel it but Iker can't bring himself to complete the thought, can't truly imagine it ever happening because it would end him, it would absolutely end him. Iker pulls away and leans up onto his elbow, delving between their warring mouths with his own to lick at their tongues for a second, for a guilty, thrilling second and then he's gone, crawling to the back of the van and opening the door to step out into the blessedly cool air, the wind around him absolutely refreshing and he stands there for just a minute, his eyes closed, head tipped up, letting the rain soak him, letting it wet his glasses, letting it obliterate every single thing else in his mind and the tiredness of his body and he almost sinks down into the wet earth right then, almost curls down to sleep there because it seems like it would be comforting, it seems like as much of a home as he can have right now and those boys, all three of them in that van in there, are tearing him into pieces.
Sergio keeps his eyes open as Fernando kisses at his mouth, as he kisses down Sergio's naked chest. He can't stop touching Fernando's hair, his high cheekbones, the freckles he can feel under his fingertips and his palms, that seem to be making his skin tingle. Fernando kisses at the skin over Sergio's heart, over and over, obsessively and reverently and Sergio curls down over him and sighs, kissing at Fernando's hairline until Fernando's mouth quietens just a little, still kissing but it's softer, fuller-mouthed, wetter.
"Mm." Sergio licks his lips as he listens to the sound of Fernando's and his eyes fall closed finally. He smiles and his arms are wrapped around Fernando's head, holding it close. "What do you feel?"
"I feel..." Fernando licks at the slightly raw skin he's marking now, his hands planted on the small of Sergio's back and he sighs very quietly. "I feel like I ain't never felt before. I feel like maybe I could be somethin' else with you, maybe be somethin' else for you even. I don't know what you done to me but I can't stop thinkin' about you, not even for one second. All I ever wanna do is touch you." Fernando draws in a breath and the air is composed of the scent of Sergio's skin and his heart skips. He kisses that very same skin again and Sergio has to hold back a whimper. "I feel your heart right here under my mouth and I just can't even believe you're lettin' me do this. I can't even believe you ever talked to me or wanted to help me and I most 'specially can't believe that you ever'd wanna care about me maybe."
Sergio dips down until he can find Fernando's mouth again and he's kissing him so gently, his own mouth tender with the need to convey emotion and he knows, he absolutely knows that Fernando can feel it because he's trembling, he's licking into Fernando's mouth and his breath is shuddering on his cheeks.
"I'm lucky to know you, Fernando. I'm supposed to know you."
Fernando lifts his head and his eyes are bright with emotion and he smiles at him.
"You really think so?"
Sergio smiles and they drop their foreheads together, hands settling so that their hearts can start to settle, too.
"I know so."
Cesc sits up and he yawns loudly just in case there was any confusion on the state of his wakefulness. He stretches his arms over his head and grunts when he settles again. He reaches up to scratch at his crazy bed (mattress?) hair and squints out the open backdoors of the van at Iker standing there, completely soaked by rain and now looking in at Cesc because he'd heard him yawn. Cesc hurries to lay back down, to curl up and face Fernando's back (he hates the smell of the corners of the van, the unknown, sticky dirt smell that is not his and so he wants no part of it). He closes his eyes just as Iker's weight enters the van again and Fernando and Sergio are lost in their own world, lost in each other's mouths and limbs. Cesc feels Iker pause and it's a loaded pause, it's one of consideration and his own body is tense waiting for the decision, waiting for the rejection though he's going to fight whatever decision Iker makes anyway. He feels his warmth and then the startling coldness of his clothes and his skin and when Iker's arms wrap around him he shoves weakly against him, grunting in such a way that he sounds sleep-heavy and it just makes Iker hold him tighter which is exactly what he wants.
"Stop it. You're soaking wet."
Iker grunts right back and he nestles his head against Cesc's shoulder and sucks in the smell of him that is so new, that is entirely different than Fernando and most definitely different than Sergio (Fernando is stale cigarettes and motor oil somehow, Sergio is sun-baked warmth and the faint smell of church incense, or of cinnamon maybe). Cesc smells like something intangibly youthful, like grass in the way of grass stains and maybe having to mow the lawn and right there beneath his ear, like lemons, something sticky sweet and heady and something he'd brought from home, something no amount of sweat or soap could wash away. He shoves at Iker again but it's weaker this time and Iker kisses at the lemonade spot, his nose buried and Cesc makes a low, whining sound.
"Now I'm cold."
"No, you're not. Shh, just lay still. You were having nightmares earlier." Iker grins against his skin and squeezes him and Cesc smirks as he pushes against him and it's all just flirtatious now.
"I was not."
"You were, too. And you said 'Oh, Iker, you big strong man, come and hold me and make me feel safe so I can sleep again. You're the only man who makes me feel so good.' I mean, you basically said that. More or less. Maybe with a few more moans."
Cesc laughs outright and he pushes at Iker with his forearms but Iker just pushes him back against the side of the van.
"That is an outright lie. Cause I don't sleep. I physically cannot go to sleep. There's something in my body that doesn't let me sleep. My doctor said I'm lucky if I live past thirty."
Iker just blinks at him in surprise and Sergio sucks softly at Fernando's neck, sensing a blatant lie from a mile away and so he doesn't even react. Fernando squints at Cesc.
"You got a doctor?"
Cesc's eyes widen and he stammers just for a minute before shrugging, fighting again against Iker's grip because it was much easier.
"I'm going to catch pneumonia! You're seriously soaking wet!"
"I bet he tastes good." Fernando waggles his eyebrows at Sergio before turning to face Iker's back, nuzzling up under his hair and licking rain from his neck, finding that he tasted absolutely wonderful, like sweat and summer rain and like the sun and so he smiles and licks again. Sergio leans over Fernando and kisses Iker's bicep, licking at his arm shyly but he's smiling, too, brave enough to be silly when Fernando's around.
"He tastes like summer."
"Yeah, that's it! Exactly, Magic." They grin at each other and keep kissing him, doing it ticklishly enough to make Iker squirm and this time it's him fighting against the bodies of all three boys and Cesc, because Iker doesn't want him to now, is holding on tight.
"You all'd better stop it! I mean it! Shit!" He starts to laugh when Cesc sucks at a strand of his hair, his cheeks on fire and he's helpless surrounded by them, absolutely helpless. "Unless you want me to do something we'd all regret, you better stop!"
Fernando quirks an eyebrow.
"Ooh, like what?"
Iker pushes at them and Fernando and Sergio turn him over until he's on his back and they tuck in against him and against each other, too somehow though Cesc remains curled up against Iker and Iker is holding him as best as he can. Cesc pretends to sigh loudly and he nestles down against Iker's shoulder, his eyes closing again and he's smiling secretly.
"Never you mind that."
"Are you gonna go to sleep, Screech? Dream about fuckin' all three of us on this mattress?"
Iker's face turns a deep shade of red but he closes his eyes, trying to pretend that Fernando's words don't affect him. He strokes the top of Cesc's head and rests his cheek on top of Sergio's, knowing that the arm around his chest is Fernando's because of how skinny it is.
"Dream? That'd be a nightmare."
Fernando smirks to himself but doesn't reply because the rain has started up again and the door is still cracked and letting in a delicious breeze and they're packed together and tired and, somehow, happy.
chapter thirteen.