TEAM PLAY: beyond the pale, "Defining Shifting Boundaries"
Title: Defining Shifting Boundaries
Author: mirror_mirrin
Team: Play
Prompt: beyond the pale
Pairing(s): McKay/Sheppard
Rating: NC-17
Warnings: Dubious consent in the middle, but it’s definitely a happy ending.
Beta: djaddict
Summary: Rodney’s overactive imagination gets him into trouble. Again.
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**
Rodney decided that he really liked his life at the moment. Being on Atlantis was so much better for him compared to life on Earth, that much was sure. He was in the best physical shape that he had ever been, he had actual friends, people whom he could trust his life with, and actually did regularly trust his life with, and challenging work that he enjoyed doing. The best thing of all was the fact that he had a partner, and all the perks that came with that, including getting laid regularly. Colonel John Sheppard, recently promoted, was his partner, and had been for the past four and a half years now.
DADT had been repealed six months ago, and since then John and Rodney had made their relationship public, much to the dismay of some of the women on and off Atlantis. Their friends and teammates had been supportive of their relationship, which was all that mattered to Rodney. They’d just moved into family-sized quarters a few days ago, something Rodney was positively delighted about.
John slid into the seat across of him in the mess hall and snagged a fry off Rodney’s plate. When Rodney didn’t say anything about it, John took another fry and said, “You know you’re grinning at me pretty sappily right now?”
Nodding, Rodney said, “I love the fact that I can do this.” He leaned forward and planted a chaste kiss on John’s lips, then another not so chaste kiss started when John nipped at Rodney’s lip. Rodney captured John’s plump lower lip with his own lips and sucked lightly, delighted when the action elicited a soft moan from his usually reticent partner. The sound of a tray hitting the table startled them and Rodney reluctantly pulled away from the kiss to settle back into his seat. He grinned at John when he felt John nudge his foot under the table.
Ronon sat down next to John and commented, “People generally eat in the mess, not suck face.”
John groaned and said, “My marines haven’t got enough to do if they keep teaching you how to talk like them. “
Ronon just shrugged and grinned toothily at John, then slapped John’s hand away when he tried to grab a fry. John made a face at him then reached for Rodney’s tray again, only to have a fork brandished at him threateningly.
“I’m hypoglycemic, I need my food. Go get your own,” Rodney said, taking a bite of the Chicken Fried Steak that was being served in the mess that day.
“I think I like you better when you’re all sappy,” John said, getting up to get his own food. He purposely walked around Rodney then grabbed a few fries from behind Rodney and walked away chewing happily, ignoring Rodney’s accusing, “Hey!”
***
Later that night, John walked into their shared quarters and sighed when he saw Rodney’s science department uniform lying on the floor in a heap, with his striped boxers right on top. His military mentality just didn’t allow him to feel comfortable with messes, something that Rodney was very fond of. John picked up the clothes and tossed them into the laundry basket, then decided to join Rodney in the shower. He stripped off his BDU’s and laid the shirt and pants over the chair just in case there was an emergency and he had to get dressed in a rush.
He chucked his boxers into the laundry basket, and caught himself having a sappy moment when he smiled at the sight of his own boxers lying on top of Rodney’s. It seemed so domestic somehow.
John walked into the bathroom, which they usually kept unlocked unless one of them needed privacy, and announced, “Honey, I’m home.”
Rodney was soaking in the enormous bathtub that dominated their bathroom, tapping away at the data pad in his hands. He barely looked up when John entered the bathroom, clearly engrossed in his work. John noticed that the device was in a clear zip-loc bag which had been sealed, so he chanced getting into the tub right next to Rodney, accidentally splashing Rodney and wetting the plastic covering the data pad.
Rodney finally looked up with a frown on his face and said, “You’re such a baby when you don’t get attention. I can’t work with this now.” He laid the data pad on the floor beside the bathtub, and with a put on sigh; Rodney spread his legs and waved John over, “Come on, then.”
John scrambled to move into his favorite position in the bathtub, with his back flush against Rodney’s front, head leaning against Rodney’s shoulder. He sighed in contentment when Rodney ran a hand down his arm, then started to draw random patterns on his belly, playing with the hairs that trailed downwards. It was more soothing than anything else.
John enjoyed moments like this, when it was just the two of them, without any interruptions from the outside world. He reached for Rodney’s hand and held on to it, just because he could. He was in love with his best friend, and it was the best feeling in the world.
He loved the fact he could trust Rodney implicitly with every aspect of his life, personal or professional. Rodney had most definitely proven himself over the past four years, when he played his part in keeping their relationship under wraps so that John’s career wouldn’t be affected.
John played with Rodney’s capable fingers, and found himself wondering if it was time to take the next step.
Of course, that was when Rodney’s comm buzzed. Rodney pulled his hand away from John with a sigh and picked up the comm from the ledge next to the bathtub.
“This better be important,” he barked at whoever it was on the other side.
John watched as Rodney rolled his eyes in frustration and said, “That idiot. Yeah, I’ll be there in ten.”
Rodney took off the comm again and told John, “Kavanagh screwed up in the labs, and it seems that Radek isn’t answering his comm, so I’ve got to fix this. I’ll be an hour, tops.”
John just raised an eyebrow at Rodney. He was never just an hour. He scooted forward and let Rodney step out of the bathtub and into the shower stall to rinse off. Rodney had left the shower door open, so John took the opportunity to unashamedly ogle the fit form of his scientist. When Rodney turned off the shower and wrapped a towel around his waist, thus concealing the view, John let a pout appear on his face and said, “It’s Saturday night. We always do our own thing on Saturday nights.”
They had managed to keep the last six Saturdays in a row to themselves, by some minor miracle. Rodney had cut a deal with Radek, as had John with Evan, so that their seconds-in-command would handle all minor emergencies that occurred. Unless something major came up, like say Wraith in the city, or Atlantis going into self-destruct mode, from 2000 on Saturday night till 1000 on Sunday morning, nobody was supposed to disturb them.
Rodney knelt next to the bathtub and kissed John on the lips, wet and dirty, then licked his lips and said, “I’ll come back tonight and fuck you through the mattress. Keep yourself ready for me.”
He gently ran the back of his hand down the side of John’s face then stalked out of the bathroom, clearly in a hurry. These gentle touches from Rodney used to surprise John, but now he cherished these gestures, knowing that this was a side of Rodney that only he got to see.
John settled back into the water, and mentally asked Atlantis to turn on the hot water in the tub for him. He closed his eyes and rested his head against the padding that Rodney had added for their comfort. He didn’t bother opening his eyes when he heard Rodney yell from their room, “John, where are my clothes? Did you put them in the laundry basket again? I left them out so that I could reuse them if I had to. I’ve got to put on a new set now, and you know how I hate to reuse clothes first things in the morning. I don’t see why you can’t just-”
John couldn’t help the small smile on his face. That was his Rodney alright. He mentally stopped the flow of the hot water and decided that he would just have to make do with the hot water relaxing him that night, instead of one, or even two orgasms.
Still, it never hurt to be too prepared, John thought to himself as he heard the front door slide open, then close again. He’d lube and stretch himself after he was done with his bath. Just in case.
***
Rodney came back from the labs almost three hours later in an utterly foul mood. Kavanaugh had managed to completely screw things up, and eventually, it had taken both Rodney and Radek over two hours to fix his mess. Rodney had spent the entire time ranting at the idiot in English, while Radek cursed at him with progressively more vulgar words in Czech. That part had been fairly amusing and somewhat educational for Rodney. Rodney was satisfied that Radek’s date with Dr. Keller had been interrupted as well. If he wasn’t getting any, he didn’t see why the other man should.
His train of thought came to an abrupt halt when he entered their quarters and saw John lying on his front on the covers, legs spread wide enough to hint at the hidden entrance in between them. Rodney sucked in a breath and walked over to sit at the edge of the bed. He debated waking John up, since he looked fast asleep, but he really couldn’t stop himself when he saw a smear of shiny lube on John’s inner thigh. John had taken him seriously and prepared himself.
Rodney ran his fingers over John’s ass and lightly teased at John’s entrance. Finding it slick and loosened, he slid two fingers in. John shifted in his sleep, so Rodney withdrew his fingers and decided to wake John up properly first. He’d learnt the hard way that surprising a soldier awake was never the best course of action.
Rodney shook John’s shoulder gently and smiled down at John when he blearily opened his eyes. “Hey, you. Up to having some fun?” Rodney asked.
“Yup,” John said, blinking sleepily. “Saved the city already?”
“Of course. Now turn over,” Rodney said, already stripping off his clothes.
John complied, and rolled over to lie on his back. He took the opportunity to stretch while he was at it, hands stretching out far above his head and arching his back, exposing his rapidly hardening cock. He was certainly a sight to behold, Rodney thought to himself.
Getting onto the bed himself, Rodney patted John’s hip and said, “lift.” He fitted a pillow underneath John’s hips, and then knelt between John’s spread legs.
Rodney slid into John’s slick hole in one easy thrust, then held himself still, giving John a chance to adjust. John wasn’t making things easy though, what with his head pressed to one side on the pillow, exposing the long line of his neck, and his hands grasping tightly at the headboard. Rodney concentrated on John’s hands for a moment, focusing on the way those long, slim fingers gripped the edges of the cool ancient alloy. He briefly wondered if John would let him tie his wrists together, and fuck him that way.
He was distracted when John moved, bucking his hips upwards, causing Rodney to slide in deeper into the warm channel. They both groaned at the sensation. Rodney barely refrained from leaving finger-shaped bruised on John’s slim hips, he was holding on that tight.
“Rodney,” John said, in a voice that was altogether too calm, considering the fact that he had Rodney’s cock buried in him. “Move already.”
Rodney leaned down to thoroughly kiss John’s lips first before pulling out partway, then thrusting back in with jarring force. John threw his head back and moaned slightly, not releasing his grip on the headboard. Encouraged by John’s reaction, Rodney kept up with the pace and angle, fantasizing the whole time about tying John’s hands to the headboard. He could picture it in his mind, John lost in mindless pleasure as Rodney fucked him, unable to reach out and touch himself or Rodney for that matter.
When something resembling tentacles sprouted from the headboard and attached themselves to John’s wrists, Rodney stopped abruptly, still buried deep within John. He stared at the pair of tentacles, made from the same alloy as the headboard, which had loosely wound themselves around John’s wrists, then merged back into the headboard, effectively pinning John’s arms above his head.
“Damn it, Rodney. Move,” John demanded.
Rodney blinked the sweat out of his eyes as he ran a hand down John’s chest, tweaking a nipple along the way. John looked incredibly wanton, lying there just begging for Rodney to fuck him. He didn’t seem perturbed by the tentacles, which seemed odd to Rodney.
“Touch yourself,” Rodney directed, as he eased out an inch or so before thrusting in again. John obediently let go of the headboard, and tried to move his right hand down to his cock only to yelp in surprise as one of the tentacles tightened around his wrist.
“What the fuck?” he said, sounding confused and more than a little surprised, which definitely echoed what Rodney was feeling. He pulled against the bonds, trying to free himself. John’s cock was still rock hard, Rodney absently noticed. He pulled out of John and straddled the other man’s thighs.
“Alright, give me a moment to figure this out,” Rodney said in what he hoped was a calm voice. His mind was racing. He’d thought of John tied up, so it was possible that his Ancient gene had somehow played a part in the emergence of the tentacles. That would mean that he should be able to switch it off with his mind as well.
Looking down at John still tugging at the tentacles, he focused on thinking “get off, get off him,” at the offending things. His mind was a traitorous thing though, as he unwillingly imagined John tied up spread-eagled on the bed, completely at Rodney’s mercy. He would be incoherent from the sheer pleasure, so Rodney would-
Rodney jerked in surprise when he felt John’s thighs move apart abruptly under him, almost unseating him. At the same time, John yelped again, and then began fighting off the tentacles anew, this time in an almost violent manner.
“Get these damn things off of me,” John said, voice increasing in volume until he was almost yelling at the end. John’s breath hitched as he struggled to control himself. He looked well truly panicked now, his cock most definitely flaccid, and Rodney sort of hated himself a little for causing this.
Rodney turned around and stared at John’s legs, now bound at the ankles to either corner of the bed by the same tentacles that had emerged from the foot of the bed frame this time. “Uh oh. Huh, ok. John, just, uh, one moment.” Rodney concentrated on John’s panicked expression, and thought “OFF” at the tentacles. He hated that helpless look on John’s face, and combined with the knowledge that Rodney had put that expression there, got his mind on the right track. The tentacles retracted smoothly into the bed, leaving no traces that they had been there.
John shoved Rodney aside and got off the bed the moment he was free. Before Rodney could say anything, he disappeared into the bathroom, and shut the door firmly behind him, the soft snick of the door locking sounding so very loud compared to the silence that followed.
Rodney was left sitting on the bed, feeling somewhat guilty. He had no idea what had just happened, or what he was supposed to do now. He got up and went to stand outside the bathroom door, debating if he should call out to John. He sat down heavily on the bed again and sighed heavily. Thinking over the sequence of events, he realized that John had been hard until those tentacles-like-things had trapped his legs as well.
Rodney heard the sound of the shower turning on and he debated going in after John. He stood outside the bathroom, forehead pressed against the cool Ancient door and called out John’s name. John took long enough to answer that Rodney was starting to get seriously worried.
“I’ll be out in awhile,” John said, his voice giving Rodney absolutely no indication as to how the other man was feeling.
Rodney frowned at the door, utterly confused. He sat down on the edge of the bed, his own erection a distant memory, and waited for John to come out. He had no idea what had just happened. Had he just directed tentacles to hold John down against his will? He wasn’t sure how he felt about that if that was true.
The bathroom door slid open and John walked out, hair still dripping water onto his shoulders but managing to stick up in random places, already living up to its normal appearance. He had a towel loosely tied around his hips. Rodney ogled him for a moment before realizing that he was supposed to be looking contrite. John looked positively edible! It wasn’t fair that he should be tempting Rodney like that.
“So,” Rodney said awkwardly, standing up to talk to John. “Looks like the Ancients were kinky bastards.”
John raised an expressive eyebrow at Rodney. “What the hell happened back there? Were those tentacles? Were you the one controlling the damned things?”
Rodney took a deep breath before answering. “They sure looked like tentacles, and yes, I was apparently controlling them. Sort of.”
John was still standing in front of him, and he braved a look at John’s face, unsure if he could face John’s accusing glare. John looked confused, like he couldn’t decide what he should be feeling.
“Look,” Rodney said, scrubbing a hand over his face tiredly. “Come lie down. I promise not to think about tying you up again.” Rodney realized a split second after the words had come out of his mouth just what he had said.
Now John looked well and truly pissed off. Without a word, he stripped off the towel and picked up his BDU’s lying over the back of the desk chair, his movements economical. Within seconds he was fully dressed and reaching for his comm that lay on the bedside table next to Rodney. Without so much as a glance in Rodney’s direction, John stalked out of the door, his wet hair still dripping onto the shoulders of his black t-shirt.
Rodney stared at John’s retreating back. He was such an idiot, he thought to himself. The two of them had made a pact early on in their relationship to avoid situations just like this by actually discussing what they wanted in bed. Granted, it was usually unnecessary since they were both pretty vanilla kind of guys, or so Rodney had thought anyway.
Glancing at the clock on the bedside table, Rodney saw that bright red digits showed 0137. Not too late then. Frowning, he thought about where John might go at that hour. John would probably go for a run to mull things over, and then end up at in the mess for some coffee, he finally decided.
He’d wait for John in the mess, and talk to him there. Rodney sincerely hoped that John wouldn’t take what had just happened the wrong way, like Julia had. She’d just freaked out and-
He took a deep breath. No, he wouldn’t even go there. John trusted him. Steeling himself internally, he put on the first pair of clothes he found and headed to the mess, not even realizing that he was barefooted.
***
John shook his head ineffectually to clear his head as he did up his boots once he had put some distance between him and their quarters. What the hell had just happened? Had Rodney just instructed Atlantis to tie him up against his will? Looking at the facts available to him, that was indeed what had happened.
He took a deep breath to calm himself down, and did some minor stretching exercises before jogging towards his usual running route. John did his best thinking when his body was engaged in some form of physical activity, be it running or sparring. It helped his mind focus on what it needed to and not be distracted by other things.
Pounding down the familiar corridors helped instill a sense of normality. His mind immediately began going through the facts again to find an answer or an explanation for what had just happened earlier that night. He slowed down, then stopped and just stood there, hands on his knees, panting as he realized that whatever the reason was, Rodney had definitely held him down against his will.
John closed his eyes and leaned his head back against the wall behind him as he considered that. He’d been a POW in Afghanistan before, where they’d kept him tied up for days at a time as they forced him to divulge information. They’d pinned him down and tortured him until he either pissed his pants or passed out, whichever came first. For one brief second while he had been completely immobilized earlier, John had looked up and seen a different man looming over him. He’d seen a bearded man mocking him in Farsi and intent on causing him pain.
This was different. It just had to be. It was Rodney, for crying out loud. Rodney wouldn’t want to genuinely hurt him, would he?
He scrubbed a hand over his eyes when he came to the conclusion that he just didn’t know. He sank down to the floor and let his head hang between his knees, taking deep breaths. He hadn’t known that Rodney had wanted to tie him up in the first place, so who knew what else Rodney wanted to do to him? But no, Rodney wouldn’t hurt him. The Rodney that he knew and loved just couldn’t.
He sighed as he tried to keep up with all the thoughts racing through his mind. He still couldn’t get over the fact that Rodney had done that without asking him, without even asking for his consent. They had an agreement, damn it. They were supposed to discuss things like this.
Clearly, running wasn’t helping much this time, John thought ruefully as he stood up. He’d go to the mess, have a cup of coffee to clear his head then head back to their quarters to talk to Rodney. They had to sort things out.
He set off at a slow jog towards the mess, his mind still trying to piece things together. He was almost right outside the mess when he heard Torren calling out to him. He picked Torren up and swung him around in the air, then settled him against his hip and said, “Hey buddy, gave your Mom the slip again, did you?”
Eyes sparkling with mischief, Torren giggled and exclaimed, “I did! Momma was talking to Unca Wodney, and Unca Wodney said you’s angwy, so I wan away to find you. Why is you angwy at Unca Wodney, Unca John?”
He patted John’s shoulder and planted a wet kiss on John’s cheek, then said with the conviction that only a three-year-old could achieve, “Unca Wodney loves you. He told me so! And Momma said that you can’t be angwy with people you love, because when I bwoked Momma’s teapot, Momma told me that.”
John smiled tiredly at his godson. The little squirt had a point. He bounced him a little to keep him entertained then continued down the corridor towards the mess, half listening as Torren continued telling John earnestly about how fighting with the people you love was not a good idea.
He walked into the mess and spotted Teyla sitting across the table from Rodney with a cup of tea in front of her. Rodney looked terrible, his face was pale and had taken on a pinched expression, and his hair was tousled and sticking up in all directions like he hadn’t bothered to comb it. He was wearing one of John’s t-shirts, the one with a panda on the front, and it was stretched tightly over his broader frame.
John put Torren down when the boy wiggled in his arms, then walked purposefully over to where Teyla was clearly consoling Rodney.
“Lost someone?” John asked Teyla as he sat down next to her. Rodney jerked his head up and stared at John, his eyes wide, then stared at his coffee mug again when John looked at him. “Hi,” Rodney said awkwardly, still staring into his coffee.
John gave him half a smile before scooping Torren up into his lap. “I found him wandering around in the corridor outside the mess. What’s he doing up so late, anyway?”
Teyla sighed and said, “Chuck looked after him in the evening while I taught my meditation class. He allowed Torren to sleep the entire time, and this is the consequence. I estimate another hour before he finally sleeps.” She waved a Life Signs Detector at John and smiled at Rodney as she said, “Rodney was kind enough to modify this for me so I can tell where Torren is at all times.” She showed him the blinking gold dot that was surrounded by three red dots. “The gold is Torren and the red ones are us. All of those whom I trust him with have been designated as red dots.”
John looked across the table at Rodney, who now had Torren in his lap. Torren was enthusiastically telling his Unca Wodney all about a shell he’d found on the beach the day before. That was the man he’d fallen in love with, the one who went out of his way to help a friend, not the man who had tied him down without asking his consent.
He barely noticed when Teyla took Torren from Rodney and said a hurried goodbye to the both of them. He gave Torren an absent kiss on the cheek then focused his attention on Rodney.
Rodney still looked pale, but now there was a light sheen of sweat on his upper lip as well. He looked like he did when they were minutes away from certain doom and there was nothing he could to do to stop it. He reached over and put his hand over Rodney’s where it was wrapped tightly around the coffee mug. Gently loosening Rodney’s grip on the cup, John stroked a thumb over the back of Rodney’s hand and said, “Whatever it is, we’ll get through this. We’ll figure it out.”
Rodney finally met John’s eyes, and then John knew for sure. Rodney’s eyes were full of contrition and worry, and maybe even a tinge of shame. Rodney would never willingly cause him pain, at least not intentionally.
John stood up and pulled Rodney up with him. “Come on,” he said. “Let’s go back to our quarters.” He hadn’t let go of Rodney’s hand, and Rodney was still gripping John’s hand tightly when they reached their room. The corridors were almost deserted at this hour, so John felt mostly comfortable displaying that much emotion in public. Rodney hadn’t said a single word, something completely uncharacteristic of him.
John led Rodney over to the couch in their room and settled the still quiet man next to him. Rodney leaned into John’s side and took a deep breath, then another. John carded his fingers through Rodney’s soft hair, debating if he should say anything right now. He reflexively tightened his grip on Rodney’s hand when he heard a sniffle, followed by what sounded scarily like a sob.
John shifted so that he was looking at Rodney, and he literally felt his heart breaking when he saw a tear run down Rodney’s cheek. “Hey,” John said, “Rodney, talk to me.”
Rodney just shook his head mutely and wrenched his hand from John’s grasp so that he could cover his face with both hands.
John bit his lip and ran a soothing hand down Rodney’s back, completely at a loss. When Rodney’s shoulders heaved under his hand, John gathered the other man against his chest and started planting soft kisses in Rodney’s hair, and talked softly to him.
Rodney finally pulled away and met John’s gaze with his red-rimmed eyes. “I’m sorry, John. I’m so fucking sorry. Please don’t leave me,” he said imploringly. Another tear rolled down unchecked, and John felt like an utter bastard for causing Rodney to feel this way.
“I’m not going leave you, Rodney. I promise,” John said with as much sincerity he could muster. He cupped Rodney’s face in his hands and kissed him, uncaring of the saltiness that covered Rodney’s lips.
“Really? Oh, thank God. I’m sorry, John,” Rodney repeated into John’s shoulder. John pulled Rodney up for another kiss, then said, “Come on, Rodney. Bed.”
Rodney was almost too pliant as he let John undress him and lead him over to the bed. He finally fell asleep with his head resting on John’s chest, his breath still hitching every once in awhile.
***
In typical Pegasus galaxy style, it was almost four days later that they finally found the time to discuss exactly what had happened. They fell back to their normal routine of sitting on the East Pier, socks and boots chucked to one side, a six-pack of Molson’s between them as they found the time to reconnect with each other.
They were well into their second beer when Rodney reached out and held John's hand in his own. Staring out into the horizon, Rodney told John, “The other night, you looked so good lying underneath me and when you held on to the headboard, I just,” he chanced a look at John's face but John was looking out at the water. Swallowing, he continued, “I wanted to tie your wrists together and just make you feel good.” He sighed, his reasoning had sounded so much better in his mind. He brought John's hand up to his lips and pressed a kiss to it. “I just wanted to make you feel good,” he repeated, sighing.
Rodney looked over at John again and this time, he met his gaze. John squeezed their entwined fingers, voice gruff with emotion, and said, “I know. I know you wouldn’t hurt me.”
Encouraged by John’s acceptance, Rodney scooted over so that he was nestled into John’s side and told John the reason why he had been so upset after. With his face buried in John’s neck and his arms wound tightly around John’s waist, Rodney told John something he had never shared with anyone willingly.
The way John’s body stiffened and the way his arms that had been holding Rodney securely tightened to an almost painful grip told Rodney how appalled John was with what he was hearing when Rodney started talking after that. Rodney told John about how his one and only encounter with bondage had been with a consenting past girlfriend in university, and that had led to her panicking and screaming for help halfway through. Her well-meaning housemate had used the spare key to unlock the door and she’d almost bashed Rodney’s head in with a lamp before chasing him out. His girlfriend at the time, Julia, hadn’t said a word to defend him, nor did she contact him after that. After a few seconds of silence, Rodney confessed that he’d thought that she was the one for him.
John didn’t say anything, but he didn’t have to. He maneuvered Rodney so that he was sitting down between John's spread legs, leaning back against John. It was their comfort position, where one of them could simply hold the other to show the love and support that they couldn’t find the words for.
A while later, John crumpled the empty can of his third beer and threw it out into the ocean and gently turned Rodney’s head so that he could give Rodney a kiss that tasted like beer. “We need more beer. Be right back,” he stated, then smoothly got to his feet.
Rodney spent a few minutes staring out into the ocean, thankful that John had seemed to accept his explanation. As a strong breeze ruffled his hair, he found himself thinking that John definitely was the best thing that had happened to him. He felt oddly vulnerable after rehashing his past, but somehow, it was alright to feel that way with John. John would take care of him, he knew that for certain.
John came back with another six-pack in one hand and a blanket in his other. He sat down next to Rodney and draped the blanket over both of their shoulders, then handed Rodney another can. They sat there in companionable silence until John opened his fifth can of beer.
“I want to tell you something. Just listen. I don’t think I can continue if you stop me,” John said, his voice tight with emotion.
John launched straight into what hadn’t been in the official classified report, since he knew Rodney well enough to know that Rodney would have hacked into his file. Rodney listened, horrified, as John recounted exactly what had been done to him when he had been held prisoner in an Afghanistan war camp. John didn’t mention the fact that he’d seen the face of one of his torturers instead of Rodney’s, but Rodney guessed it anyway.
John was shivering just a tiniest bit despite the blanket by the time he was done. Rodney was breathing heavily, hating the fact that John had had to endure so much pointless pain for a reason that he simply could not fathom. He wrapped his arms around John and them seamlessly moved so that they were in their comfort position, with John lying back against Rodney, then he kissed the soft skin underneath John's ear. They just sat there for some time, the beer lying forgotten by their sides.
***
It was well past midnight when they walked back to their quarters, stumbling a little along the way. They gave each other quick handjobs, and curled around each other in bed, both seeking the warmth and security that the other offered freely.
“Rodney,” John said, his voice slurring ever so slightly. “I’d never do what she did to you, ever. I trust you.”
John didn’t really hear Rodney’s response since he fell asleep straightaway, but he did feel Rodney’s arm tighten around his chest.
***
It had been over three weeks since That Disastrous Day, as Rodney called it in his mind, and since then, Rodney had firmly pushed any and all thoughts involving John being tied up out of his mind. He found that he was perfectly content with what they did, and it certainly wasn’t worth it pushing any boundaries.
That was why the events of that day were the last thing Rodney had on his mind when John started acting a little off in the morning. John hadn’t been keeping up with their usual banter all morning, even in their shared shower, and frankly, Rodney was getting worried.
“Rodney,” John said as Rodney laced up his boots, “I, uh, wanna try that again.”
Rodney just stared blankly at John. Sure, he was a genius, but even he couldn't read minds. Well, not anymore he amended, thinking about that brief time when he had been ascended.
“Okay. What is it that you want to try again?” Rodney asked. John looked oddly skittish and maybe even somewhat nervous about whatever it was he was trying to say.
John huffed impatiently before blurting out, “I think I liked it. When you tied me up, that is. Just, I've got to be ready for it, you know. Be mentally prepared for it.”
At Rodney's almost incredulous look, John tried to explain. “I think I liked the fact that you were controlling it. I don’t know, Rodney. I just want to try it.””
Rodney took a deep breath, then let it out slowly. He didn't want to mess this up. He glanced over at John and mentally chastised himself for taking so long to answer. John was looking discouraged, shoulders slumped as he rubbed the back of his neck nervously.
“John,” Rodney said softly. John didn't even look up from where he was staring a hole through the floor. “John,” Rodney repeated, louder this time. Rodney walked over to where John was standing and stroked his hand up John's arm, then gently took hold of John's chin, forcing John to look into Rodney's eyes.
Rodney kissed the tip of John's nose, then putting as much conviction into his voice as he could, Rodney said, “I'd be honored to.” He kissed John properly on the lips, trying his best to convey what he was feeling to John. “We'll do it right this time,” Rodney said against John’s mouth.
“Thank you for telling me this. Thank you for trusting me enough,” Rodney said earnestly to John.
It wasn't a typical Harlequin-esque moment, John didn't just melt into his arms and start acting all submissive. Instead, he was still stiff in Rodney's arms, but slowly started to respond to the kiss.
Rodney slid his hands down John's back and wedged his hands down John's BDUs, cupping John's ass through his boxers.
“Do we have enough time?” John asked, panting as Rodney wiggled his hand and managed to pull John's boxers down enough to stroke a finger over John's entrance.
They had a senior staff meeting at 0900, and the digital clock on the bedside table showed it was now 0842. Rodney did some quick calculations, it would take them 6 minutes to reach the conference room for the Senior Staff meeting, and at least 3 minutes for a quick clean-up, so that left them exactly 9 minutes.
Rodney deftly unbuttoned the front of John's BDU's single-handedly as he pushed the finger lightly stroking over John's entrance in slightly. He swallowed the cry that John let out with a kiss, then pulled away and said, “We have 9 minutes. We'll make it work.”
By now, John's BDU's were unzipped, so it was a simple matter of pulling his boxers down as well. Almost reluctantly, Rodney took his hands off John and told him, “Get the lube and go sit on the bed.”
John gave Rodney a look that told him that he clearly didn't appreciate being ordered around like that.
“Oh, come on. Do you want to get off or not?” Rodney pointedly asked as he gestured towards the bed.
John just rolled his eyes at Rodney and grabbed the lube off the bedside table, where the bright red figures showed 0843. He had just sat down on the bed and bent down to unlace his boots when Rodney snapped, “No, don't take off your boots, getting them off then on again will take another 90 seconds.”
Rodney quickly unfastened his own standard issue Science Department pants and shoved them down to around his thighs. He purposefully walked over to John and knelt in front of him, and without any preamble, swallowed John down whole.
Grabbing the tube of lube from John’s slack fingers, Rodney nudged John's knees apart as much as he could with his BDUs still in place. He slathered the lube generously onto two fingers and without any warning, plunged both fingers into John's entrance and aimed for his prostate. From the keening cry he heard from above, Rodney guessed that he had definitely hit the right spot.
A glance at the clock showed another minute had passed, so Rodney sped up the pace. He was glad that he was ambidextrous - he was fingering John with his left hand, stroking his own cock with his right, while his mouth was occupied with sucking John's cock.
He felt John's body shift and angled his head upwards to see John balancing on his elbows so that he could look at Rodney simultaneously sucking him off and fingering him. He was voyeuristic like that. Rodney pulled off John's cock and raised his head up for a kiss. John indulged him for a few seconds then pushed Rodney's head down.
“Time, Rodney,” John said with a smirk.
Rodney gave the sharp angle of John's hip a sharp nip before sucking on the tip of John's cock, his tongue playing with the bundle of nerves underneath the head.
Rodney moved his head forward until his nose was buried in John's pubic hair and was gratified to hear a thump, indicating that John had let his head fall back onto the bed. John was moaning continuously now, seemingly unable to keep quiet.
Rodney twisted his fingers that were still buried in John's ass, then pulled them out, letting go of John's cock at the same time. John whined out a complaint from above him. Grabbing a condom from the box from where it was conveniently located next to the clock, Rodney quickly tore one open and got it on himself. He patted John’s hip, “Hands and knees, quick. Four more minutes.”
John scrambled to get on his hand and knees, mumbling about bossy bastards. It was tricky navigating, since John’s pants and boots were still on, but Rodney wasn’t called a genius for no reason. Gripping John’s hips, he aligned his cock and slid home with a groan.
Almost immediately, he pulled out halfway, and then thrust in again, nailing John's prostate. “Jerk yourself off,” Rodney gasped, as he continued his rhythm. Thrust in, grind, pause, pull out and repeat. He repeated it exactly six times, then found his rhythm faltering when he heard John snort, then moan loudly as he came. Almost immediately, John collapsed on his front and rolled to his side and burst into laughter.
Rodney stared at him, baffled and more than a little affronted. He didn’t see what was so funny about the whole situation. John made quick work of pulling up his boxers and pants, but left them undone for now. Still chuckling, John said, “Only you, buddy. Only you.”
“What-“ Rodney started, then decided he really didn’t care, since John had dropped to his knees and pulled off the condom. He played with Rodney’s balls with one hand as he sucked on Rodney’s cock. It didn’t take long at all for Rodney to come. He didn’t bother to warn John since he knew that the other man preferred to swallow anyway.
John dropped the condom into the waste paper basket next to the bed, and pulled open the first drawer of the bedside table to get the baby wipes. They were hypoallergenic, of course. Rodney sat heavily on the bed, narrowly missing John’s cum, which had most definitely ruined their coverlet.
John efficiently cleaned them both up, cheerfully talking as he wiped away any residual stickiness. Rodney had always thought that it was slightly odd that John was so chipper after being fucked. He let the words wash over him, but looked up and tried to concentrate when John said, “Thrust in, grind, pause, pull out and repeat. Do you always chant something like that in your head when you’re fucking me?” Not giving Rodney a chance to answer, he pulled Rodney to his feet, then chivalrously did Rodney’s pants up since he still looked slightly dazed.
Rodney frowned slightly at John who was now stuffing their coverlet into the laundry basket. “I didn’t hear you complaining earlier.”
John finished straightening the new coverlet that Rodney didn’t even know they owned and said, “Oh, I’m not complaining. I think it’s sweet.” He pulled Rodney into a brief kiss then said, “Come on, 0855. You know how irritated Woolsey will be if we’re late. Again.”
Rodney collected his data pad from the desk, and they hurried out the door, walking at a brisk pace towards the conference room. If the backs of their hands brushed against one another as they reached the conference room, well, who could blame them?
End.
**
Poll
Author: mirror_mirrin
Team: Play
Prompt: beyond the pale
Pairing(s): McKay/Sheppard
Rating: NC-17
Warnings: Dubious consent in the middle, but it’s definitely a happy ending.
Beta: djaddict
Summary: Rodney’s overactive imagination gets him into trouble. Again.
Once you've read the story, please take a moment to vote in the poll below. Ratings go from 1 (low) to 9 (high), so all you need to do is enter a single number in that range into each text entry box. You'll be able to see the Prompt and Team (Genre) information in the header above.
More details about the voting procedure can be found here.
**
Rodney decided that he really liked his life at the moment. Being on Atlantis was so much better for him compared to life on Earth, that much was sure. He was in the best physical shape that he had ever been, he had actual friends, people whom he could trust his life with, and actually did regularly trust his life with, and challenging work that he enjoyed doing. The best thing of all was the fact that he had a partner, and all the perks that came with that, including getting laid regularly. Colonel John Sheppard, recently promoted, was his partner, and had been for the past four and a half years now.
DADT had been repealed six months ago, and since then John and Rodney had made their relationship public, much to the dismay of some of the women on and off Atlantis. Their friends and teammates had been supportive of their relationship, which was all that mattered to Rodney. They’d just moved into family-sized quarters a few days ago, something Rodney was positively delighted about.
John slid into the seat across of him in the mess hall and snagged a fry off Rodney’s plate. When Rodney didn’t say anything about it, John took another fry and said, “You know you’re grinning at me pretty sappily right now?”
Nodding, Rodney said, “I love the fact that I can do this.” He leaned forward and planted a chaste kiss on John’s lips, then another not so chaste kiss started when John nipped at Rodney’s lip. Rodney captured John’s plump lower lip with his own lips and sucked lightly, delighted when the action elicited a soft moan from his usually reticent partner. The sound of a tray hitting the table startled them and Rodney reluctantly pulled away from the kiss to settle back into his seat. He grinned at John when he felt John nudge his foot under the table.
Ronon sat down next to John and commented, “People generally eat in the mess, not suck face.”
John groaned and said, “My marines haven’t got enough to do if they keep teaching you how to talk like them. “
Ronon just shrugged and grinned toothily at John, then slapped John’s hand away when he tried to grab a fry. John made a face at him then reached for Rodney’s tray again, only to have a fork brandished at him threateningly.
“I’m hypoglycemic, I need my food. Go get your own,” Rodney said, taking a bite of the Chicken Fried Steak that was being served in the mess that day.
“I think I like you better when you’re all sappy,” John said, getting up to get his own food. He purposely walked around Rodney then grabbed a few fries from behind Rodney and walked away chewing happily, ignoring Rodney’s accusing, “Hey!”
***
Later that night, John walked into their shared quarters and sighed when he saw Rodney’s science department uniform lying on the floor in a heap, with his striped boxers right on top. His military mentality just didn’t allow him to feel comfortable with messes, something that Rodney was very fond of. John picked up the clothes and tossed them into the laundry basket, then decided to join Rodney in the shower. He stripped off his BDU’s and laid the shirt and pants over the chair just in case there was an emergency and he had to get dressed in a rush.
He chucked his boxers into the laundry basket, and caught himself having a sappy moment when he smiled at the sight of his own boxers lying on top of Rodney’s. It seemed so domestic somehow.
John walked into the bathroom, which they usually kept unlocked unless one of them needed privacy, and announced, “Honey, I’m home.”
Rodney was soaking in the enormous bathtub that dominated their bathroom, tapping away at the data pad in his hands. He barely looked up when John entered the bathroom, clearly engrossed in his work. John noticed that the device was in a clear zip-loc bag which had been sealed, so he chanced getting into the tub right next to Rodney, accidentally splashing Rodney and wetting the plastic covering the data pad.
Rodney finally looked up with a frown on his face and said, “You’re such a baby when you don’t get attention. I can’t work with this now.” He laid the data pad on the floor beside the bathtub, and with a put on sigh; Rodney spread his legs and waved John over, “Come on, then.”
John scrambled to move into his favorite position in the bathtub, with his back flush against Rodney’s front, head leaning against Rodney’s shoulder. He sighed in contentment when Rodney ran a hand down his arm, then started to draw random patterns on his belly, playing with the hairs that trailed downwards. It was more soothing than anything else.
John enjoyed moments like this, when it was just the two of them, without any interruptions from the outside world. He reached for Rodney’s hand and held on to it, just because he could. He was in love with his best friend, and it was the best feeling in the world.
He loved the fact he could trust Rodney implicitly with every aspect of his life, personal or professional. Rodney had most definitely proven himself over the past four years, when he played his part in keeping their relationship under wraps so that John’s career wouldn’t be affected.
John played with Rodney’s capable fingers, and found himself wondering if it was time to take the next step.
Of course, that was when Rodney’s comm buzzed. Rodney pulled his hand away from John with a sigh and picked up the comm from the ledge next to the bathtub.
“This better be important,” he barked at whoever it was on the other side.
John watched as Rodney rolled his eyes in frustration and said, “That idiot. Yeah, I’ll be there in ten.”
Rodney took off the comm again and told John, “Kavanagh screwed up in the labs, and it seems that Radek isn’t answering his comm, so I’ve got to fix this. I’ll be an hour, tops.”
John just raised an eyebrow at Rodney. He was never just an hour. He scooted forward and let Rodney step out of the bathtub and into the shower stall to rinse off. Rodney had left the shower door open, so John took the opportunity to unashamedly ogle the fit form of his scientist. When Rodney turned off the shower and wrapped a towel around his waist, thus concealing the view, John let a pout appear on his face and said, “It’s Saturday night. We always do our own thing on Saturday nights.”
They had managed to keep the last six Saturdays in a row to themselves, by some minor miracle. Rodney had cut a deal with Radek, as had John with Evan, so that their seconds-in-command would handle all minor emergencies that occurred. Unless something major came up, like say Wraith in the city, or Atlantis going into self-destruct mode, from 2000 on Saturday night till 1000 on Sunday morning, nobody was supposed to disturb them.
Rodney knelt next to the bathtub and kissed John on the lips, wet and dirty, then licked his lips and said, “I’ll come back tonight and fuck you through the mattress. Keep yourself ready for me.”
He gently ran the back of his hand down the side of John’s face then stalked out of the bathroom, clearly in a hurry. These gentle touches from Rodney used to surprise John, but now he cherished these gestures, knowing that this was a side of Rodney that only he got to see.
John settled back into the water, and mentally asked Atlantis to turn on the hot water in the tub for him. He closed his eyes and rested his head against the padding that Rodney had added for their comfort. He didn’t bother opening his eyes when he heard Rodney yell from their room, “John, where are my clothes? Did you put them in the laundry basket again? I left them out so that I could reuse them if I had to. I’ve got to put on a new set now, and you know how I hate to reuse clothes first things in the morning. I don’t see why you can’t just-”
John couldn’t help the small smile on his face. That was his Rodney alright. He mentally stopped the flow of the hot water and decided that he would just have to make do with the hot water relaxing him that night, instead of one, or even two orgasms.
Still, it never hurt to be too prepared, John thought to himself as he heard the front door slide open, then close again. He’d lube and stretch himself after he was done with his bath. Just in case.
***
Rodney came back from the labs almost three hours later in an utterly foul mood. Kavanaugh had managed to completely screw things up, and eventually, it had taken both Rodney and Radek over two hours to fix his mess. Rodney had spent the entire time ranting at the idiot in English, while Radek cursed at him with progressively more vulgar words in Czech. That part had been fairly amusing and somewhat educational for Rodney. Rodney was satisfied that Radek’s date with Dr. Keller had been interrupted as well. If he wasn’t getting any, he didn’t see why the other man should.
His train of thought came to an abrupt halt when he entered their quarters and saw John lying on his front on the covers, legs spread wide enough to hint at the hidden entrance in between them. Rodney sucked in a breath and walked over to sit at the edge of the bed. He debated waking John up, since he looked fast asleep, but he really couldn’t stop himself when he saw a smear of shiny lube on John’s inner thigh. John had taken him seriously and prepared himself.
Rodney ran his fingers over John’s ass and lightly teased at John’s entrance. Finding it slick and loosened, he slid two fingers in. John shifted in his sleep, so Rodney withdrew his fingers and decided to wake John up properly first. He’d learnt the hard way that surprising a soldier awake was never the best course of action.
Rodney shook John’s shoulder gently and smiled down at John when he blearily opened his eyes. “Hey, you. Up to having some fun?” Rodney asked.
“Yup,” John said, blinking sleepily. “Saved the city already?”
“Of course. Now turn over,” Rodney said, already stripping off his clothes.
John complied, and rolled over to lie on his back. He took the opportunity to stretch while he was at it, hands stretching out far above his head and arching his back, exposing his rapidly hardening cock. He was certainly a sight to behold, Rodney thought to himself.
Getting onto the bed himself, Rodney patted John’s hip and said, “lift.” He fitted a pillow underneath John’s hips, and then knelt between John’s spread legs.
Rodney slid into John’s slick hole in one easy thrust, then held himself still, giving John a chance to adjust. John wasn’t making things easy though, what with his head pressed to one side on the pillow, exposing the long line of his neck, and his hands grasping tightly at the headboard. Rodney concentrated on John’s hands for a moment, focusing on the way those long, slim fingers gripped the edges of the cool ancient alloy. He briefly wondered if John would let him tie his wrists together, and fuck him that way.
He was distracted when John moved, bucking his hips upwards, causing Rodney to slide in deeper into the warm channel. They both groaned at the sensation. Rodney barely refrained from leaving finger-shaped bruised on John’s slim hips, he was holding on that tight.
“Rodney,” John said, in a voice that was altogether too calm, considering the fact that he had Rodney’s cock buried in him. “Move already.”
Rodney leaned down to thoroughly kiss John’s lips first before pulling out partway, then thrusting back in with jarring force. John threw his head back and moaned slightly, not releasing his grip on the headboard. Encouraged by John’s reaction, Rodney kept up with the pace and angle, fantasizing the whole time about tying John’s hands to the headboard. He could picture it in his mind, John lost in mindless pleasure as Rodney fucked him, unable to reach out and touch himself or Rodney for that matter.
When something resembling tentacles sprouted from the headboard and attached themselves to John’s wrists, Rodney stopped abruptly, still buried deep within John. He stared at the pair of tentacles, made from the same alloy as the headboard, which had loosely wound themselves around John’s wrists, then merged back into the headboard, effectively pinning John’s arms above his head.
“Damn it, Rodney. Move,” John demanded.
Rodney blinked the sweat out of his eyes as he ran a hand down John’s chest, tweaking a nipple along the way. John looked incredibly wanton, lying there just begging for Rodney to fuck him. He didn’t seem perturbed by the tentacles, which seemed odd to Rodney.
“Touch yourself,” Rodney directed, as he eased out an inch or so before thrusting in again. John obediently let go of the headboard, and tried to move his right hand down to his cock only to yelp in surprise as one of the tentacles tightened around his wrist.
“What the fuck?” he said, sounding confused and more than a little surprised, which definitely echoed what Rodney was feeling. He pulled against the bonds, trying to free himself. John’s cock was still rock hard, Rodney absently noticed. He pulled out of John and straddled the other man’s thighs.
“Alright, give me a moment to figure this out,” Rodney said in what he hoped was a calm voice. His mind was racing. He’d thought of John tied up, so it was possible that his Ancient gene had somehow played a part in the emergence of the tentacles. That would mean that he should be able to switch it off with his mind as well.
Looking down at John still tugging at the tentacles, he focused on thinking “get off, get off him,” at the offending things. His mind was a traitorous thing though, as he unwillingly imagined John tied up spread-eagled on the bed, completely at Rodney’s mercy. He would be incoherent from the sheer pleasure, so Rodney would-
Rodney jerked in surprise when he felt John’s thighs move apart abruptly under him, almost unseating him. At the same time, John yelped again, and then began fighting off the tentacles anew, this time in an almost violent manner.
“Get these damn things off of me,” John said, voice increasing in volume until he was almost yelling at the end. John’s breath hitched as he struggled to control himself. He looked well truly panicked now, his cock most definitely flaccid, and Rodney sort of hated himself a little for causing this.
Rodney turned around and stared at John’s legs, now bound at the ankles to either corner of the bed by the same tentacles that had emerged from the foot of the bed frame this time. “Uh oh. Huh, ok. John, just, uh, one moment.” Rodney concentrated on John’s panicked expression, and thought “OFF” at the tentacles. He hated that helpless look on John’s face, and combined with the knowledge that Rodney had put that expression there, got his mind on the right track. The tentacles retracted smoothly into the bed, leaving no traces that they had been there.
John shoved Rodney aside and got off the bed the moment he was free. Before Rodney could say anything, he disappeared into the bathroom, and shut the door firmly behind him, the soft snick of the door locking sounding so very loud compared to the silence that followed.
Rodney was left sitting on the bed, feeling somewhat guilty. He had no idea what had just happened, or what he was supposed to do now. He got up and went to stand outside the bathroom door, debating if he should call out to John. He sat down heavily on the bed again and sighed heavily. Thinking over the sequence of events, he realized that John had been hard until those tentacles-like-things had trapped his legs as well.
Rodney heard the sound of the shower turning on and he debated going in after John. He stood outside the bathroom, forehead pressed against the cool Ancient door and called out John’s name. John took long enough to answer that Rodney was starting to get seriously worried.
“I’ll be out in awhile,” John said, his voice giving Rodney absolutely no indication as to how the other man was feeling.
Rodney frowned at the door, utterly confused. He sat down on the edge of the bed, his own erection a distant memory, and waited for John to come out. He had no idea what had just happened. Had he just directed tentacles to hold John down against his will? He wasn’t sure how he felt about that if that was true.
The bathroom door slid open and John walked out, hair still dripping water onto his shoulders but managing to stick up in random places, already living up to its normal appearance. He had a towel loosely tied around his hips. Rodney ogled him for a moment before realizing that he was supposed to be looking contrite. John looked positively edible! It wasn’t fair that he should be tempting Rodney like that.
“So,” Rodney said awkwardly, standing up to talk to John. “Looks like the Ancients were kinky bastards.”
John raised an expressive eyebrow at Rodney. “What the hell happened back there? Were those tentacles? Were you the one controlling the damned things?”
Rodney took a deep breath before answering. “They sure looked like tentacles, and yes, I was apparently controlling them. Sort of.”
John was still standing in front of him, and he braved a look at John’s face, unsure if he could face John’s accusing glare. John looked confused, like he couldn’t decide what he should be feeling.
“Look,” Rodney said, scrubbing a hand over his face tiredly. “Come lie down. I promise not to think about tying you up again.” Rodney realized a split second after the words had come out of his mouth just what he had said.
Now John looked well and truly pissed off. Without a word, he stripped off the towel and picked up his BDU’s lying over the back of the desk chair, his movements economical. Within seconds he was fully dressed and reaching for his comm that lay on the bedside table next to Rodney. Without so much as a glance in Rodney’s direction, John stalked out of the door, his wet hair still dripping onto the shoulders of his black t-shirt.
Rodney stared at John’s retreating back. He was such an idiot, he thought to himself. The two of them had made a pact early on in their relationship to avoid situations just like this by actually discussing what they wanted in bed. Granted, it was usually unnecessary since they were both pretty vanilla kind of guys, or so Rodney had thought anyway.
Glancing at the clock on the bedside table, Rodney saw that bright red digits showed 0137. Not too late then. Frowning, he thought about where John might go at that hour. John would probably go for a run to mull things over, and then end up at in the mess for some coffee, he finally decided.
He’d wait for John in the mess, and talk to him there. Rodney sincerely hoped that John wouldn’t take what had just happened the wrong way, like Julia had. She’d just freaked out and-
He took a deep breath. No, he wouldn’t even go there. John trusted him. Steeling himself internally, he put on the first pair of clothes he found and headed to the mess, not even realizing that he was barefooted.
***
John shook his head ineffectually to clear his head as he did up his boots once he had put some distance between him and their quarters. What the hell had just happened? Had Rodney just instructed Atlantis to tie him up against his will? Looking at the facts available to him, that was indeed what had happened.
He took a deep breath to calm himself down, and did some minor stretching exercises before jogging towards his usual running route. John did his best thinking when his body was engaged in some form of physical activity, be it running or sparring. It helped his mind focus on what it needed to and not be distracted by other things.
Pounding down the familiar corridors helped instill a sense of normality. His mind immediately began going through the facts again to find an answer or an explanation for what had just happened earlier that night. He slowed down, then stopped and just stood there, hands on his knees, panting as he realized that whatever the reason was, Rodney had definitely held him down against his will.
John closed his eyes and leaned his head back against the wall behind him as he considered that. He’d been a POW in Afghanistan before, where they’d kept him tied up for days at a time as they forced him to divulge information. They’d pinned him down and tortured him until he either pissed his pants or passed out, whichever came first. For one brief second while he had been completely immobilized earlier, John had looked up and seen a different man looming over him. He’d seen a bearded man mocking him in Farsi and intent on causing him pain.
This was different. It just had to be. It was Rodney, for crying out loud. Rodney wouldn’t want to genuinely hurt him, would he?
He scrubbed a hand over his eyes when he came to the conclusion that he just didn’t know. He sank down to the floor and let his head hang between his knees, taking deep breaths. He hadn’t known that Rodney had wanted to tie him up in the first place, so who knew what else Rodney wanted to do to him? But no, Rodney wouldn’t hurt him. The Rodney that he knew and loved just couldn’t.
He sighed as he tried to keep up with all the thoughts racing through his mind. He still couldn’t get over the fact that Rodney had done that without asking him, without even asking for his consent. They had an agreement, damn it. They were supposed to discuss things like this.
Clearly, running wasn’t helping much this time, John thought ruefully as he stood up. He’d go to the mess, have a cup of coffee to clear his head then head back to their quarters to talk to Rodney. They had to sort things out.
He set off at a slow jog towards the mess, his mind still trying to piece things together. He was almost right outside the mess when he heard Torren calling out to him. He picked Torren up and swung him around in the air, then settled him against his hip and said, “Hey buddy, gave your Mom the slip again, did you?”
Eyes sparkling with mischief, Torren giggled and exclaimed, “I did! Momma was talking to Unca Wodney, and Unca Wodney said you’s angwy, so I wan away to find you. Why is you angwy at Unca Wodney, Unca John?”
He patted John’s shoulder and planted a wet kiss on John’s cheek, then said with the conviction that only a three-year-old could achieve, “Unca Wodney loves you. He told me so! And Momma said that you can’t be angwy with people you love, because when I bwoked Momma’s teapot, Momma told me that.”
John smiled tiredly at his godson. The little squirt had a point. He bounced him a little to keep him entertained then continued down the corridor towards the mess, half listening as Torren continued telling John earnestly about how fighting with the people you love was not a good idea.
He walked into the mess and spotted Teyla sitting across the table from Rodney with a cup of tea in front of her. Rodney looked terrible, his face was pale and had taken on a pinched expression, and his hair was tousled and sticking up in all directions like he hadn’t bothered to comb it. He was wearing one of John’s t-shirts, the one with a panda on the front, and it was stretched tightly over his broader frame.
John put Torren down when the boy wiggled in his arms, then walked purposefully over to where Teyla was clearly consoling Rodney.
“Lost someone?” John asked Teyla as he sat down next to her. Rodney jerked his head up and stared at John, his eyes wide, then stared at his coffee mug again when John looked at him. “Hi,” Rodney said awkwardly, still staring into his coffee.
John gave him half a smile before scooping Torren up into his lap. “I found him wandering around in the corridor outside the mess. What’s he doing up so late, anyway?”
Teyla sighed and said, “Chuck looked after him in the evening while I taught my meditation class. He allowed Torren to sleep the entire time, and this is the consequence. I estimate another hour before he finally sleeps.” She waved a Life Signs Detector at John and smiled at Rodney as she said, “Rodney was kind enough to modify this for me so I can tell where Torren is at all times.” She showed him the blinking gold dot that was surrounded by three red dots. “The gold is Torren and the red ones are us. All of those whom I trust him with have been designated as red dots.”
John looked across the table at Rodney, who now had Torren in his lap. Torren was enthusiastically telling his Unca Wodney all about a shell he’d found on the beach the day before. That was the man he’d fallen in love with, the one who went out of his way to help a friend, not the man who had tied him down without asking his consent.
He barely noticed when Teyla took Torren from Rodney and said a hurried goodbye to the both of them. He gave Torren an absent kiss on the cheek then focused his attention on Rodney.
Rodney still looked pale, but now there was a light sheen of sweat on his upper lip as well. He looked like he did when they were minutes away from certain doom and there was nothing he could to do to stop it. He reached over and put his hand over Rodney’s where it was wrapped tightly around the coffee mug. Gently loosening Rodney’s grip on the cup, John stroked a thumb over the back of Rodney’s hand and said, “Whatever it is, we’ll get through this. We’ll figure it out.”
Rodney finally met John’s eyes, and then John knew for sure. Rodney’s eyes were full of contrition and worry, and maybe even a tinge of shame. Rodney would never willingly cause him pain, at least not intentionally.
John stood up and pulled Rodney up with him. “Come on,” he said. “Let’s go back to our quarters.” He hadn’t let go of Rodney’s hand, and Rodney was still gripping John’s hand tightly when they reached their room. The corridors were almost deserted at this hour, so John felt mostly comfortable displaying that much emotion in public. Rodney hadn’t said a single word, something completely uncharacteristic of him.
John led Rodney over to the couch in their room and settled the still quiet man next to him. Rodney leaned into John’s side and took a deep breath, then another. John carded his fingers through Rodney’s soft hair, debating if he should say anything right now. He reflexively tightened his grip on Rodney’s hand when he heard a sniffle, followed by what sounded scarily like a sob.
John shifted so that he was looking at Rodney, and he literally felt his heart breaking when he saw a tear run down Rodney’s cheek. “Hey,” John said, “Rodney, talk to me.”
Rodney just shook his head mutely and wrenched his hand from John’s grasp so that he could cover his face with both hands.
John bit his lip and ran a soothing hand down Rodney’s back, completely at a loss. When Rodney’s shoulders heaved under his hand, John gathered the other man against his chest and started planting soft kisses in Rodney’s hair, and talked softly to him.
Rodney finally pulled away and met John’s gaze with his red-rimmed eyes. “I’m sorry, John. I’m so fucking sorry. Please don’t leave me,” he said imploringly. Another tear rolled down unchecked, and John felt like an utter bastard for causing Rodney to feel this way.
“I’m not going leave you, Rodney. I promise,” John said with as much sincerity he could muster. He cupped Rodney’s face in his hands and kissed him, uncaring of the saltiness that covered Rodney’s lips.
“Really? Oh, thank God. I’m sorry, John,” Rodney repeated into John’s shoulder. John pulled Rodney up for another kiss, then said, “Come on, Rodney. Bed.”
Rodney was almost too pliant as he let John undress him and lead him over to the bed. He finally fell asleep with his head resting on John’s chest, his breath still hitching every once in awhile.
***
In typical Pegasus galaxy style, it was almost four days later that they finally found the time to discuss exactly what had happened. They fell back to their normal routine of sitting on the East Pier, socks and boots chucked to one side, a six-pack of Molson’s between them as they found the time to reconnect with each other.
They were well into their second beer when Rodney reached out and held John's hand in his own. Staring out into the horizon, Rodney told John, “The other night, you looked so good lying underneath me and when you held on to the headboard, I just,” he chanced a look at John's face but John was looking out at the water. Swallowing, he continued, “I wanted to tie your wrists together and just make you feel good.” He sighed, his reasoning had sounded so much better in his mind. He brought John's hand up to his lips and pressed a kiss to it. “I just wanted to make you feel good,” he repeated, sighing.
Rodney looked over at John again and this time, he met his gaze. John squeezed their entwined fingers, voice gruff with emotion, and said, “I know. I know you wouldn’t hurt me.”
Encouraged by John’s acceptance, Rodney scooted over so that he was nestled into John’s side and told John the reason why he had been so upset after. With his face buried in John’s neck and his arms wound tightly around John’s waist, Rodney told John something he had never shared with anyone willingly.
The way John’s body stiffened and the way his arms that had been holding Rodney securely tightened to an almost painful grip told Rodney how appalled John was with what he was hearing when Rodney started talking after that. Rodney told John about how his one and only encounter with bondage had been with a consenting past girlfriend in university, and that had led to her panicking and screaming for help halfway through. Her well-meaning housemate had used the spare key to unlock the door and she’d almost bashed Rodney’s head in with a lamp before chasing him out. His girlfriend at the time, Julia, hadn’t said a word to defend him, nor did she contact him after that. After a few seconds of silence, Rodney confessed that he’d thought that she was the one for him.
John didn’t say anything, but he didn’t have to. He maneuvered Rodney so that he was sitting down between John's spread legs, leaning back against John. It was their comfort position, where one of them could simply hold the other to show the love and support that they couldn’t find the words for.
A while later, John crumpled the empty can of his third beer and threw it out into the ocean and gently turned Rodney’s head so that he could give Rodney a kiss that tasted like beer. “We need more beer. Be right back,” he stated, then smoothly got to his feet.
Rodney spent a few minutes staring out into the ocean, thankful that John had seemed to accept his explanation. As a strong breeze ruffled his hair, he found himself thinking that John definitely was the best thing that had happened to him. He felt oddly vulnerable after rehashing his past, but somehow, it was alright to feel that way with John. John would take care of him, he knew that for certain.
John came back with another six-pack in one hand and a blanket in his other. He sat down next to Rodney and draped the blanket over both of their shoulders, then handed Rodney another can. They sat there in companionable silence until John opened his fifth can of beer.
“I want to tell you something. Just listen. I don’t think I can continue if you stop me,” John said, his voice tight with emotion.
John launched straight into what hadn’t been in the official classified report, since he knew Rodney well enough to know that Rodney would have hacked into his file. Rodney listened, horrified, as John recounted exactly what had been done to him when he had been held prisoner in an Afghanistan war camp. John didn’t mention the fact that he’d seen the face of one of his torturers instead of Rodney’s, but Rodney guessed it anyway.
John was shivering just a tiniest bit despite the blanket by the time he was done. Rodney was breathing heavily, hating the fact that John had had to endure so much pointless pain for a reason that he simply could not fathom. He wrapped his arms around John and them seamlessly moved so that they were in their comfort position, with John lying back against Rodney, then he kissed the soft skin underneath John's ear. They just sat there for some time, the beer lying forgotten by their sides.
***
It was well past midnight when they walked back to their quarters, stumbling a little along the way. They gave each other quick handjobs, and curled around each other in bed, both seeking the warmth and security that the other offered freely.
“Rodney,” John said, his voice slurring ever so slightly. “I’d never do what she did to you, ever. I trust you.”
John didn’t really hear Rodney’s response since he fell asleep straightaway, but he did feel Rodney’s arm tighten around his chest.
***
It had been over three weeks since That Disastrous Day, as Rodney called it in his mind, and since then, Rodney had firmly pushed any and all thoughts involving John being tied up out of his mind. He found that he was perfectly content with what they did, and it certainly wasn’t worth it pushing any boundaries.
That was why the events of that day were the last thing Rodney had on his mind when John started acting a little off in the morning. John hadn’t been keeping up with their usual banter all morning, even in their shared shower, and frankly, Rodney was getting worried.
“Rodney,” John said as Rodney laced up his boots, “I, uh, wanna try that again.”
Rodney just stared blankly at John. Sure, he was a genius, but even he couldn't read minds. Well, not anymore he amended, thinking about that brief time when he had been ascended.
“Okay. What is it that you want to try again?” Rodney asked. John looked oddly skittish and maybe even somewhat nervous about whatever it was he was trying to say.
John huffed impatiently before blurting out, “I think I liked it. When you tied me up, that is. Just, I've got to be ready for it, you know. Be mentally prepared for it.”
At Rodney's almost incredulous look, John tried to explain. “I think I liked the fact that you were controlling it. I don’t know, Rodney. I just want to try it.””
Rodney took a deep breath, then let it out slowly. He didn't want to mess this up. He glanced over at John and mentally chastised himself for taking so long to answer. John was looking discouraged, shoulders slumped as he rubbed the back of his neck nervously.
“John,” Rodney said softly. John didn't even look up from where he was staring a hole through the floor. “John,” Rodney repeated, louder this time. Rodney walked over to where John was standing and stroked his hand up John's arm, then gently took hold of John's chin, forcing John to look into Rodney's eyes.
Rodney kissed the tip of John's nose, then putting as much conviction into his voice as he could, Rodney said, “I'd be honored to.” He kissed John properly on the lips, trying his best to convey what he was feeling to John. “We'll do it right this time,” Rodney said against John’s mouth.
“Thank you for telling me this. Thank you for trusting me enough,” Rodney said earnestly to John.
It wasn't a typical Harlequin-esque moment, John didn't just melt into his arms and start acting all submissive. Instead, he was still stiff in Rodney's arms, but slowly started to respond to the kiss.
Rodney slid his hands down John's back and wedged his hands down John's BDUs, cupping John's ass through his boxers.
“Do we have enough time?” John asked, panting as Rodney wiggled his hand and managed to pull John's boxers down enough to stroke a finger over John's entrance.
They had a senior staff meeting at 0900, and the digital clock on the bedside table showed it was now 0842. Rodney did some quick calculations, it would take them 6 minutes to reach the conference room for the Senior Staff meeting, and at least 3 minutes for a quick clean-up, so that left them exactly 9 minutes.
Rodney deftly unbuttoned the front of John's BDU's single-handedly as he pushed the finger lightly stroking over John's entrance in slightly. He swallowed the cry that John let out with a kiss, then pulled away and said, “We have 9 minutes. We'll make it work.”
By now, John's BDU's were unzipped, so it was a simple matter of pulling his boxers down as well. Almost reluctantly, Rodney took his hands off John and told him, “Get the lube and go sit on the bed.”
John gave Rodney a look that told him that he clearly didn't appreciate being ordered around like that.
“Oh, come on. Do you want to get off or not?” Rodney pointedly asked as he gestured towards the bed.
John just rolled his eyes at Rodney and grabbed the lube off the bedside table, where the bright red figures showed 0843. He had just sat down on the bed and bent down to unlace his boots when Rodney snapped, “No, don't take off your boots, getting them off then on again will take another 90 seconds.”
Rodney quickly unfastened his own standard issue Science Department pants and shoved them down to around his thighs. He purposefully walked over to John and knelt in front of him, and without any preamble, swallowed John down whole.
Grabbing the tube of lube from John’s slack fingers, Rodney nudged John's knees apart as much as he could with his BDUs still in place. He slathered the lube generously onto two fingers and without any warning, plunged both fingers into John's entrance and aimed for his prostate. From the keening cry he heard from above, Rodney guessed that he had definitely hit the right spot.
A glance at the clock showed another minute had passed, so Rodney sped up the pace. He was glad that he was ambidextrous - he was fingering John with his left hand, stroking his own cock with his right, while his mouth was occupied with sucking John's cock.
He felt John's body shift and angled his head upwards to see John balancing on his elbows so that he could look at Rodney simultaneously sucking him off and fingering him. He was voyeuristic like that. Rodney pulled off John's cock and raised his head up for a kiss. John indulged him for a few seconds then pushed Rodney's head down.
“Time, Rodney,” John said with a smirk.
Rodney gave the sharp angle of John's hip a sharp nip before sucking on the tip of John's cock, his tongue playing with the bundle of nerves underneath the head.
Rodney moved his head forward until his nose was buried in John's pubic hair and was gratified to hear a thump, indicating that John had let his head fall back onto the bed. John was moaning continuously now, seemingly unable to keep quiet.
Rodney twisted his fingers that were still buried in John's ass, then pulled them out, letting go of John's cock at the same time. John whined out a complaint from above him. Grabbing a condom from the box from where it was conveniently located next to the clock, Rodney quickly tore one open and got it on himself. He patted John’s hip, “Hands and knees, quick. Four more minutes.”
John scrambled to get on his hand and knees, mumbling about bossy bastards. It was tricky navigating, since John’s pants and boots were still on, but Rodney wasn’t called a genius for no reason. Gripping John’s hips, he aligned his cock and slid home with a groan.
Almost immediately, he pulled out halfway, and then thrust in again, nailing John's prostate. “Jerk yourself off,” Rodney gasped, as he continued his rhythm. Thrust in, grind, pause, pull out and repeat. He repeated it exactly six times, then found his rhythm faltering when he heard John snort, then moan loudly as he came. Almost immediately, John collapsed on his front and rolled to his side and burst into laughter.
Rodney stared at him, baffled and more than a little affronted. He didn’t see what was so funny about the whole situation. John made quick work of pulling up his boxers and pants, but left them undone for now. Still chuckling, John said, “Only you, buddy. Only you.”
“What-“ Rodney started, then decided he really didn’t care, since John had dropped to his knees and pulled off the condom. He played with Rodney’s balls with one hand as he sucked on Rodney’s cock. It didn’t take long at all for Rodney to come. He didn’t bother to warn John since he knew that the other man preferred to swallow anyway.
John dropped the condom into the waste paper basket next to the bed, and pulled open the first drawer of the bedside table to get the baby wipes. They were hypoallergenic, of course. Rodney sat heavily on the bed, narrowly missing John’s cum, which had most definitely ruined their coverlet.
John efficiently cleaned them both up, cheerfully talking as he wiped away any residual stickiness. Rodney had always thought that it was slightly odd that John was so chipper after being fucked. He let the words wash over him, but looked up and tried to concentrate when John said, “Thrust in, grind, pause, pull out and repeat. Do you always chant something like that in your head when you’re fucking me?” Not giving Rodney a chance to answer, he pulled Rodney to his feet, then chivalrously did Rodney’s pants up since he still looked slightly dazed.
Rodney frowned slightly at John who was now stuffing their coverlet into the laundry basket. “I didn’t hear you complaining earlier.”
John finished straightening the new coverlet that Rodney didn’t even know they owned and said, “Oh, I’m not complaining. I think it’s sweet.” He pulled Rodney into a brief kiss then said, “Come on, 0855. You know how irritated Woolsey will be if we’re late. Again.”
Rodney collected his data pad from the desk, and they hurried out the door, walking at a brisk pace towards the conference room. If the backs of their hands brushed against one another as they reached the conference room, well, who could blame them?
End.
**
Poll