McShep Match Warm Up Challenge - the Drabble Tree

[fluffyllama]

It’s time for the first of our warm-up challenges here at mcshep_match!

The aim of this event is to create a drabble tree - a set of drabbles branching off from each other each based on words or phrases from a previous drabble in the tree.

To take part, all you need to do is write a drabble - you can find a great post on drabble-writing here, but basically

Comments

[fluffyllama]

"You can't call it that," Rodney spluttered. "It's the wrong colour."

"It's the right shape," John pointed out. "And size. Sizes."

"Okay, yes. But we can't choose names based on your latest TV obsessions. It's unscientific!" He jabbed a finger at John. "Unprofessional." Thank god he'd hidden the Babylon 5 DVDs.

"But it can travel to different points in space?"

"Yes, but-"

"And time too, right?"

"Yes, but we can't… what was it Elizabeth said? Keep imposing our cultural whatsit-"

"Have fun with the TARDIS, John," Teyla called out, hurrying past.

Rodney sighed. This would never happen on Star Trek.

[flitter_and_fly]

"This would never happen on Star Trek!" Rodney cried.

"No, on Star Trek they'd be orange-skinned," John snarked back. He fell to a knee and shot three of the supposed honor guard.

"What is this trek of stars?" Teyla asked as she dropped a man.

"It's that vid the lovebirds watched during their last courting event," Ronon blasted the last of the enemies.

"That was the reboot," Rodney frowned. "I'm a fan of next-gen personally, though Kirk here liked the Hollywood explosions."

"You know you loved it, Rodney," John smirked.

"I did not," Rodney denied, but his blush gave him away.

[melagan]

"I did not."

"Sure, you didn't," John pointed to the bulge in Rodney's pocket.

"That's not mine." Rodney folded his arms and glared at John.

"But you took it," John insisted. "Botany is having fits. Lorne still has purple spots."

"Crap. Botany's known for being vengeful, ah, didn't you warn, Lorne?" Rodney pulled the fruit from his pocket. "Fine. I got it for you. It tastes like chocolate. I thought…

"What?"

"You. Me. Bed, naked, nibble. Maybe lick that spot -"

"Oh hell." John pulled Rodney close. "Maybe I'll just tell Lorne, a few purple-spotted marines never hurt anyone."

Unfunny

[mific]

King Rodney was bored.

He kicked his useless jester. "Entertain me!"

Sheppard startled awake. "What? How?"

"That's your job!"

He was the unfunniest jester imaginable. He wouldn't wear motley, just black. He kept losing the hats with bells - Rodney'd found three so far, stuffed behind tapestries. One was hacked up in the jousting yard, which was disturbing.

Rodney scowled. "If my last jester hadn't vanished, you'd be unemployed. How ever did you pass jester school?"

"Didn't."

"Then why are you here?"

"I'm your bodyguard."

"I need a bodyguard? Against what?"

"Clowns," said Sheppard darkly. "It's okay - I dealt with him."

Just Checking

[mific]

"You can't come in here!" King Rodney tried to push the thick door shut, but Sheppard slipped past him.

"Is there no privacy?" complained Rodney, exasperated beyind measure.

Sheppard peered suspiciously down the stone chute of the garderobe.

"See any clowns down there?" Rodney asked nastily.

"Nope, you're good to go."

Rodney tapped his foot. "Well?"

"Well what?" asked Sheppard, the fool. Rodney rolled his eyes. If only.

"When are you buggering off to let me shit in peace?"

"You want me to go?"

"Oh for Christ's sake!" Rodney pushed him out the door.

"I'll be right outside!" called Sheppard.

Thorough

[mific]

"When you say 'bodyguard'" Rodney said thoughtfully, "We're talking about my body, right?"

"Yeah," agreed Sheppard, bouncing a little. They were sitting on King Rodney's enormous bed.

"So how can you guard it if you can't see it?" Rodney plucked at his shirt. "Under all these clothes."

Sheppard frowned. "I could take them off," he suggested.

Rodney nodded. "There might be clowns hiding in the folds," he said seriously. "Tiny ones."

Sheppard growled and pinned him to the bed, stripping him ruthlessly, buttons flying.

"Make sure you check thoroughly," said Rodney as Sheppard rolled him over and spread his legs.

Crafty

[mific]

"I don't think there are clowns up my ass, Sheppard," said King Rodney, biting his lip.

"Might be," muttered Sheppard, spreading the king's cheeks wider. "Can't hurt to check."

"It can, actually," gasped Rodney. "But you can use your tongue."

"Okay," said Sheppard, "Good idea." He got right down to it, all business.

"Nrrggh," moaned Rodney some time later, as Sheppard surfaced.

"Can’t get in far enough," panted Sheppard, wiping his mouth. "Crafty fuckers could be lurking further up." He pushed a finger in as far as it would go and swivelled it.

Rodney whimpered and clawed at the covers.

Temporary Fix

[mific]

"This'll sort them out," said Sheppard, dripping King Rodney's imported almond oil into the royal ass. "They won't like this."

"Oh God," slurred Rodney, as Sheppard pushed oil slicked fingers in.

"That's more like it," Sheppard said, satisfied. "Really getting up there now." He curled his fingers and Rodney came all over the mattress.

"We're almost there," Sheppard reassured him. "I think we got them. I'll just use my cock to be sure."

He arranged Rodney's boneless body and fucked him hard, yelling "Take that you bastards!"

"Drowned them?" asked King Rodney, afterwards. "For now," panted Sheppard, collapsed beside him.

[that_which]

Most of the Lords of the Genii Court were gone (although one was hacked up in the jousting yard, which was disturbing).

Senior Administrative Wizard McKay was well and truly pissed, and ranting at a very great speed.

“...insane stupidity of your feeble mind and how you could possibly have thought that was in any way a good idea...”

The captain of the guard backed him up into the door and wedged a knee between his legs.

“Because I hate it when I’m late for a date.”

“Good point,” said McKay, and they didn’t talk very much for a while.

[velocitygrass]

It took Rodney embarrassingly long to realize what exactly was bugging him about the way John treated him lately. John hadn't been hostile. The increasingly infrequent questions about what Rodney was doing later weren't reproachful or clingy. There'd simply been something off.

Suddenly Rodney realized that John had been all business with him for a while. It wasn't immediately noticeable because John was insolent with his superiors and companionable to his subordinates.

Rodney tried-and failed-to recall when they'd last spent an evening together, just the two of them.

When John opened the door, Rodney simply said, "I'm sorry."

Vacation

[velocitygrass]

They weren't deprived exactly on Atlantis, but the sight of the enormous bed in their hotel suite made Rodney's eyes glaze over.

He let himself fall face first, arms spread into the soft but not too yielding vastness.

John snorted. "I don't mind staying in, but I kinda had something else in mind."

"I'm not getting up for a week," Rodney mumbled into the sheets. One side of the bed dipped down, and John's voice came from close above his ear.

"I can keep you fed if you want," he said, kissing Rodney's temple. "For compensation."

"Then name your price."

[busaikko]

"Oooh," Rodney says in appreciation, snapping his fingers impatiently at the clerk to open the display case. John's intent on hiding his sex-shop related freakout, and smiles and nods like he knows what the fuck Rodney is talking about, saying cool at what he figures are appropriate junctures.

So now John's dick's padlocked into a device: he can't come, can't even get hard, not until Rodney sets him free. And Rodney's staring like John's the best present anyone ever gave him. John can't help himself. He touches Rodney, saying, "All yours," and Rodney touches back, says smugly, "I know."

[neevebrody]

(future fic/AU)

"Jeannie?" Everything's okay, Rodney mouths.

"Really? Nine pounds."

"Ferris? That's perfect; your daughter's got a wicked sense of humor."

"Yes, he's right… You should see the look in his eyes. Hear that? It's the sound of Tonka Toy stock skyrocketing."

"You did? Just now?" Rodney waves wildly at the laptop.

The vid's attached to the email.

"He's beautiful, isn't he?"

John smiles and nods. "Like his mama."

"Can you even believe it - our Maddie?"

"Our Maddie?"

"Don't you feel like you raised her?"

John fingers the ring on Rodney's left hand. "I wonder sometimes if she didn't raise us."

[trophic]

So now John's dick's padlocked into a device, and Rodney's manning the remote control.

"Damn it, McKay!" John says, but Rodney's diabolical, giving him only the briefest flashes of shudder-inducing stimulation.

"Oh, come on. If I give you any more this will be over in fifteen seconds," Rodney says.

"Crap," John says, and maybe he's whining, but damn it, the thing on his dick feels like flying when Rodney lets him have a bit of juice. "C'mon, Rodney. Please."

"Well," Rodney says thoughtfully, "I did want a turn, myself."

John comes before Rodney's thumb even moves on the remote.

[trillingstar]

Rodney snaps his fingers. "We should go to Toronto Island!"

"You gonna swim?"

"We could borrow a boat," Rodney says. "Zombies can't swim."

"Sure they can," John replies. "They don't even have to breathe."

"Fast, they can't swim fast, okay? No way would they have the motor skills necessary to do more than a dog paddle!"

"But during that time you'd be trapped on an island," John says. "And they'd get there eventually, even if it took walking over the squishy, water-logged, sunken corpses of their peers."

Rodney stares for a while, then says, thoughtfully, "An island with an airport."

[neevebrody]

"I'll just tell Lorne it's a food allergy; everyone already knows about the citrus thing."

"Nah," John said. "He's too smart for that."

"But he makes a pointed remark about it every time-yesterday in front of Ronon. Thing is… it's true. See? Red, puffy…"

John put down his comic and squinted appraisingly at Rodney's lips. "How about kiss-bruised?"

"Oh, you are so not helping."

John grinned and turned a page. "I still say ignore 'em."

"No, there's only one thing to do-you're going to have to start shaving on your days off."

"Could stop kissing you…"

"Not. Helping."