I mean if he wasn't paying and was being a truly dead beat dad I could see perhaps being forced to give up custody rights or go to jail, but come on!
40% of your paycheck, tution, PLUS what has to be paid when he is taking care of the kids himself seems like a whole lot for them to say you're an asshole here are your options.
Is there any way he could talk to maybe someone that amy offer free legal aide? They may get that settled without either of those things occuring.
Seems to me like the state is being a bunch of ass holes, and someone had to have complaint to get that pushed.
It does seem that way, doesn't it? As far as I can tell, the paper pushers are mad that some of his paychecks aren't big enough for them to take all the money every time. Because it is a hassle, they would rather he go to jail than deal with it. That's what enrages me - it isn't that he doesn't pay, it's that the way he pays is inconvenient for the state.
This sounds totally outrageous. I wonder if there is a lawyer in his area who would defend him in court pro bono. There must be other divorced/separated fathers in the same boat.
He is in a very small town in a largely rural area and the case is taking place in another state where his ex lives. The court appointed lawyer wasn't even able to negotiate the monthly fees so as a family, we had to hire someone. She did a great job, but my mother-in-law ran up every cent of credit she had just to get the fees where he could afford them... that's when his ex suddenly decided all four of their children had to go to Catholic school. :(
He can go back to court and renegotiate the settlement. Most states limit the amount of child support that can be paid, as a percentage of income (like, 20% for one child, 25 for two, etc.) What state was the original child support document in?
Is the mother in this situation working? Does she make a substantial amount?
The court can renegotiate all of these types of things, so contacting a lawyer would be the best thing.
The state the children live in is Missouri. While current support is limited to a percentage of his income, he also owes almost 2 years back child support, which is why his payments are so high. He narrowly avoided jail twice already.
The mother sometimes works and sometimes doesn't. However, with 4 kids, she's fully "employed" all the time. At the time of the divorce, my brother in law was making 70k and she was a stay-at-home mother. He lost his job and couldn't make the payments.
As noted above, his lawyer that kept him out of jail and renegotiated (twice) was great, but we can't afford her any more and the court appointed lawyer didn't know his ass from a hole in the ground and tried to tell my brother in law that jail time wasn't so bad.
How often does your BIL pay into the child support? Because, per Missouri Section 452-350, part 4:
In the event of a delinquency in child support or maintenance payments in an amount equal to one month's total support obligation, the notice further shall direct the employer or other payor to withhold each month an additional amount equal to fifty percent of one month's child support and maintenance until the support delinquency is paid in full.
Perhaps he should be paying into a trust account that does monthly disbursements (according to MO state law), rather than paying weekly (per his pay structure). This sounds like it would be relatively simple to set up, although I don't know if the state of Missouri would be so accommodating. However, this may be something that could be set up through the CSE office rather than requiring a lawyer.
(Just trying to offer some hope, however faint a glimmer it might be. This situation sucks.)
Actually he thought of and suggested that himself, and was told that it wasn't an option because of his delinquency in the past. It would *make sense* but we aren't about making sense, just simplifying the paperwork.
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I mean if he wasn't paying and was being a truly dead beat dad I could see perhaps being forced to give up custody rights or go to jail, but come on!
40% of your paycheck, tution, PLUS what has to be paid when he is taking care of the kids himself seems like a whole lot for them to say you're an asshole here are your options.
Is there any way he could talk to maybe someone that amy offer free legal aide? They may get that settled without either of those things occuring.
Seems to me like the state is being a bunch of ass holes, and someone had to have complaint to get that pushed.
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Is the mother in this situation working? Does she make a substantial amount?
The court can renegotiate all of these types of things, so contacting a lawyer would be the best thing.
Reply
The mother sometimes works and sometimes doesn't. However, with 4 kids, she's fully "employed" all the time. At the time of the divorce, my brother in law was making 70k and she was a stay-at-home mother. He lost his job and couldn't make the payments.
As noted above, his lawyer that kept him out of jail and renegotiated (twice) was great, but we can't afford her any more and the court appointed lawyer didn't know his ass from a hole in the ground and tried to tell my brother in law that jail time wasn't so bad.
Reply
In the event of a delinquency in child support or maintenance payments in an amount equal to one month's total support obligation, the notice further shall direct the employer or other payor to withhold each month an additional amount equal to fifty percent of one month's child support and maintenance until the support delinquency is paid in full.
Perhaps he should be paying into a trust account that does monthly disbursements (according to MO state law), rather than paying weekly (per his pay structure). This sounds like it would be relatively simple to set up, although I don't know if the state of Missouri would be so accommodating. However, this may be something that could be set up through the CSE office rather than requiring a lawyer.
(Just trying to offer some hope, however faint a glimmer it might be. This situation sucks.)
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