Leaving you
Title: Leaving you
Author: Maxime (maxime260)
Pairing: KangTeuk (Kangin/Leeteuk)
Characters: Kangin, Leeteuk
Genre: Romance, drama
Rating: PG
Summary: It's hard to leave the person you love so much.
Leaving you
Don't go, Youngwoon. Please, stay with us. Stay with... me.
The car was slightly shaking while it was crossing a rather empty road, making his head move from side to side, according to the movements of the vehicle. Staring blankly ahead, having his eyes fixed on a spot somewhere in the middle of the seat in front of him, he kept his lips pressed firmly against each other and rested his hands emotionlessly at his sides. He leaned his body limply against the seat, not making a single move by himself, only getting tossed around by the travel.
Let's go together someday. Don't leave me now. You know that I need you, how do you think will I be able to make it without you? Where will I get all my strength from?
"Mr. Kim? Is everything all right?"
"Yes. I'm just thinking."
"I see. Well, I just wanted to say that we are almost there. Do you want to do anything before we go in?"
"Do anything? What do you mean?"
"Some people do some crazy things right before they walk or drive in there... like running around naked or peeing at the wall. You know, just to feel this last bit of freedom."
"No, I don't need such things. That's immature."
"Just as you wish, Mr. Kim. I will be driving the car to the inside then. We have to pass through the security gate so be prepared for it."
"Yes."
You are running away from me.
"Your friends..."
"What about them?"
"Did they tell you a nice goodbye?"
"Goodbyes aren't nice. But yes, they accompanied me to the airport and stayed there until my plane took off."
"You seem to have good friends."
"I guess so..."
You think that you are showing your tough side by going away but you are a fool. You are weak, because you are simply avoiding problems. You are always escaping, Youngwoon. Always.
"Do you have a girlfriend? Is there anyone I should comfort and take care of while you're away, Mr. Kim?"
"Uhm... There isn't. I don't have a girlfriend."
"It's better this way. Women tend to worry too much. They get too emotional about this all. But every man has to do this, right?"
"That's why I'm going. It's my duty. Getting emotional isn't indeed the right thing to do at this moment."
"I see that we perfectly understand each other, Mr. Kim."
I hate you for making me love you. You can't just walk into my life and then leave right away. Why are you doing this to me?
Finally, a big building could be seen in front of the car. It was surrounded by a broad ground, secured by a heavy barbed fence and two towers with security guards inside. They stopped the vehicle by the gate and a security man came out of a little cabin, placing himself next to the driver.
"Good morning. Name?"
"Good morning. My name is Cho Chang-su, I am the driver of Mr. Kim Youngwoon who is starting his army duties today. He is sitting at the back of the car, there you can see him."
"All right. Please, show me your papers... Ah, good. Yes, you can come in. Park the car at the right place."
"Understood."
A while later, the black van was standing not far away from the building, next to a little spot with blooming flowers. Youngwoon left the car and looked at the small garden, widening his eyes in surprise.
"I've never thought that they could have flowers at military places like this."
"Well, life is full of surprises. It's quite nice here, isn't it?"
"Yeah. Maybe they did it for the guests and visitors. I guess my new home will be more dirty."
He took a look around, observing every detail surrounding him. Suddenly, he felt that some kind of dizziness was capturing him - so he placed himself quickly on a bench and lowered his head, trying to catch deep breaths.
The driver must have noticed that because he appeared in front of Youngwoon, watching him with worry and placing a hand on his shoulder.
"Are you ok, Mr. Kim? Do you need anything?"
"Thank you, I just want to rest a bit before I go in."
"Do so if you feel like it."
Youngwoon closed his eyes and memories started to pour over him, in such a big amount that he couldn't drive them out. So he stopped trying to get them out of his head and just let them capture him.
Jungsoo stared at the man he loved, he stared at him, wanting to memorize the last moments he spent with him forever. Youngwoon had his head lowered, not being able to look the leader straight into the eyes. He felt how a soft hand gently brushed his arm and he let out a deep sigh, thinking about what he should say. But in fact, there was no need to say anything. They had talked about this for hundreds of times so this matter had been discussed from A to Z.
The elder stepped even closer to him and also lowered his head, just to put his forehead against the latter's and close his eyes, feeling delighted by the intimate contact he had with the man at that moment.
"I'll do my things with Super Junior and I'll come to you in a year, Youngwoon. I don't want to be away from you for two goddamned years. One year is long enough." Jungsoo whispered slowly and felt that his lover shook his head vigorously but he ignored this and only continued speaking. "You can't stop me. I want to be with you."
"Jungsoo, don't. Don't do this. I'm sure they will dismiss you from the army duties because of your bad health. Don't be stubborn, I think they wouldn't put you in the same detachment with me anyway. The army is huge, Jungsoo." Youngwoon finally protested. The other man moved his head and looked up, making at last eye contact with him. Jungsoo could see sadness in the dark irides, sadness and despair. He couldn't stand this, he wanted him to be always cheerful and happy and pleased.
"Two years is too much."
"No, you will get through it. Look, you have so many people who will stand by your side, the other members love you and they will do anything to make you happy. Be always the great leader of Super Junior. Take care of the members and let them take care of you. Everything will be fine."
This words made Jungsoo's heart break into tiny pieces; he quickly turned his head away from the younger one, not wanting him to notice the tears which started to form in his eyes. Youngwoon wasn't dumb however, he knew when his lover tried to hide such things from him. That's why he grabbed him firmly with his muscular arms and pulled him close to him, burying his nose in Jungsoo's fragrant hair.
"You can always come and visit me, you know. Of course, you can't do it too often but of course visits are allowed. Love grows stronger when you don't see someone for some time, remember this. I think this separation will be good for us, it will make us respect and cultivate this love more. And I will have time to think about everything bad I have done in the past. I need this, Jungsoo. You can't always justify me. I have to know that I have done wrong."
Silent sobs could have been heard coming from the leader; Youngwoon gently stroked his back, placing also a short kiss on his head. Then they stood in such a position for a few minutes, being quiet. When Jungsoo raised his head and looked into his lover's face again, the younger one wiped his tears away and sent him a slight smile.
"Ok now?"
Jungsoo nodded and Youngwoon got closer to him, connecting their lips for a few seconds. The warmth of the other one's lips made him feel their strong bond and realize how important in fact that man for him was. It all had started with a simple crush, some feelings of attraction towards the beautiful leader of Super Junior but after some time he had begun to see this in a different way; it was love. And when he had noticed that this feelings weren't one-sided, he had never felt happier in his life before.
The elder's lips trembled a bit so Youngwoon moved back and embraced him strongly again.
"I have to go now, my plane is taking off in a few minutes."
"I'm already missing you, Youngwoonie..."
"Can we go now, Mr. Kim?"
"...yes. We can go now."
With this words, Youngwoon stood up firmly and looked at the building in front of him.
It had been his own choice so he couldn't escape from this now. It was a trial, a challenge and his duty.
When he was about to head to the inside, he suddenly felt something vibrating in his pocket and took out his phone to see who was calling. It wasn't a call however; he got a text message.
<>
Youngwoon laughed and put the phone back to his pocket, shaking his head with disbelief.
"Yah, this weirdo. He can't even stand a day without me" he mumbled to himself with a light smile. A smile which faded away with each second, letting a feeling of sadness capture him.
Author: Maxime (maxime260)
Pairing: KangTeuk (Kangin/Leeteuk)
Characters: Kangin, Leeteuk
Genre: Romance, drama
Rating: PG
Summary: It's hard to leave the person you love so much.
Leaving you
Don't go, Youngwoon. Please, stay with us. Stay with... me.
The car was slightly shaking while it was crossing a rather empty road, making his head move from side to side, according to the movements of the vehicle. Staring blankly ahead, having his eyes fixed on a spot somewhere in the middle of the seat in front of him, he kept his lips pressed firmly against each other and rested his hands emotionlessly at his sides. He leaned his body limply against the seat, not making a single move by himself, only getting tossed around by the travel.
Let's go together someday. Don't leave me now. You know that I need you, how do you think will I be able to make it without you? Where will I get all my strength from?
"Mr. Kim? Is everything all right?"
"Yes. I'm just thinking."
"I see. Well, I just wanted to say that we are almost there. Do you want to do anything before we go in?"
"Do anything? What do you mean?"
"Some people do some crazy things right before they walk or drive in there... like running around naked or peeing at the wall. You know, just to feel this last bit of freedom."
"No, I don't need such things. That's immature."
"Just as you wish, Mr. Kim. I will be driving the car to the inside then. We have to pass through the security gate so be prepared for it."
"Yes."
You are running away from me.
"Your friends..."
"What about them?"
"Did they tell you a nice goodbye?"
"Goodbyes aren't nice. But yes, they accompanied me to the airport and stayed there until my plane took off."
"You seem to have good friends."
"I guess so..."
You think that you are showing your tough side by going away but you are a fool. You are weak, because you are simply avoiding problems. You are always escaping, Youngwoon. Always.
"Do you have a girlfriend? Is there anyone I should comfort and take care of while you're away, Mr. Kim?"
"Uhm... There isn't. I don't have a girlfriend."
"It's better this way. Women tend to worry too much. They get too emotional about this all. But every man has to do this, right?"
"That's why I'm going. It's my duty. Getting emotional isn't indeed the right thing to do at this moment."
"I see that we perfectly understand each other, Mr. Kim."
I hate you for making me love you. You can't just walk into my life and then leave right away. Why are you doing this to me?
Finally, a big building could be seen in front of the car. It was surrounded by a broad ground, secured by a heavy barbed fence and two towers with security guards inside. They stopped the vehicle by the gate and a security man came out of a little cabin, placing himself next to the driver.
"Good morning. Name?"
"Good morning. My name is Cho Chang-su, I am the driver of Mr. Kim Youngwoon who is starting his army duties today. He is sitting at the back of the car, there you can see him."
"All right. Please, show me your papers... Ah, good. Yes, you can come in. Park the car at the right place."
"Understood."
A while later, the black van was standing not far away from the building, next to a little spot with blooming flowers. Youngwoon left the car and looked at the small garden, widening his eyes in surprise.
"I've never thought that they could have flowers at military places like this."
"Well, life is full of surprises. It's quite nice here, isn't it?"
"Yeah. Maybe they did it for the guests and visitors. I guess my new home will be more dirty."
He took a look around, observing every detail surrounding him. Suddenly, he felt that some kind of dizziness was capturing him - so he placed himself quickly on a bench and lowered his head, trying to catch deep breaths.
The driver must have noticed that because he appeared in front of Youngwoon, watching him with worry and placing a hand on his shoulder.
"Are you ok, Mr. Kim? Do you need anything?"
"Thank you, I just want to rest a bit before I go in."
"Do so if you feel like it."
Youngwoon closed his eyes and memories started to pour over him, in such a big amount that he couldn't drive them out. So he stopped trying to get them out of his head and just let them capture him.
Jungsoo stared at the man he loved, he stared at him, wanting to memorize the last moments he spent with him forever. Youngwoon had his head lowered, not being able to look the leader straight into the eyes. He felt how a soft hand gently brushed his arm and he let out a deep sigh, thinking about what he should say. But in fact, there was no need to say anything. They had talked about this for hundreds of times so this matter had been discussed from A to Z.
The elder stepped even closer to him and also lowered his head, just to put his forehead against the latter's and close his eyes, feeling delighted by the intimate contact he had with the man at that moment.
"I'll do my things with Super Junior and I'll come to you in a year, Youngwoon. I don't want to be away from you for two goddamned years. One year is long enough." Jungsoo whispered slowly and felt that his lover shook his head vigorously but he ignored this and only continued speaking. "You can't stop me. I want to be with you."
"Jungsoo, don't. Don't do this. I'm sure they will dismiss you from the army duties because of your bad health. Don't be stubborn, I think they wouldn't put you in the same detachment with me anyway. The army is huge, Jungsoo." Youngwoon finally protested. The other man moved his head and looked up, making at last eye contact with him. Jungsoo could see sadness in the dark irides, sadness and despair. He couldn't stand this, he wanted him to be always cheerful and happy and pleased.
"Two years is too much."
"No, you will get through it. Look, you have so many people who will stand by your side, the other members love you and they will do anything to make you happy. Be always the great leader of Super Junior. Take care of the members and let them take care of you. Everything will be fine."
This words made Jungsoo's heart break into tiny pieces; he quickly turned his head away from the younger one, not wanting him to notice the tears which started to form in his eyes. Youngwoon wasn't dumb however, he knew when his lover tried to hide such things from him. That's why he grabbed him firmly with his muscular arms and pulled him close to him, burying his nose in Jungsoo's fragrant hair.
"You can always come and visit me, you know. Of course, you can't do it too often but of course visits are allowed. Love grows stronger when you don't see someone for some time, remember this. I think this separation will be good for us, it will make us respect and cultivate this love more. And I will have time to think about everything bad I have done in the past. I need this, Jungsoo. You can't always justify me. I have to know that I have done wrong."
Silent sobs could have been heard coming from the leader; Youngwoon gently stroked his back, placing also a short kiss on his head. Then they stood in such a position for a few minutes, being quiet. When Jungsoo raised his head and looked into his lover's face again, the younger one wiped his tears away and sent him a slight smile.
"Ok now?"
Jungsoo nodded and Youngwoon got closer to him, connecting their lips for a few seconds. The warmth of the other one's lips made him feel their strong bond and realize how important in fact that man for him was. It all had started with a simple crush, some feelings of attraction towards the beautiful leader of Super Junior but after some time he had begun to see this in a different way; it was love. And when he had noticed that this feelings weren't one-sided, he had never felt happier in his life before.
The elder's lips trembled a bit so Youngwoon moved back and embraced him strongly again.
"I have to go now, my plane is taking off in a few minutes."
"I'm already missing you, Youngwoonie..."
"Can we go now, Mr. Kim?"
"...yes. We can go now."
With this words, Youngwoon stood up firmly and looked at the building in front of him.
It had been his own choice so he couldn't escape from this now. It was a trial, a challenge and his duty.
When he was about to head to the inside, he suddenly felt something vibrating in his pocket and took out his phone to see who was calling. It wasn't a call however; he got a text message.
<>
Youngwoon laughed and put the phone back to his pocket, shaking his head with disbelief.
"Yah, this weirdo. He can't even stand a day without me" he mumbled to himself with a light smile. A smile which faded away with each second, letting a feeling of sadness capture him.