The Art of (Not) Letting Go, Part 3
Snowflake for Greenstuff
Prompt: Why do you always want the one thing you can't have? Unrequited/requited love. M&M. ANGST
Summary: Three years after his marriage to Abigail, Marshall wonders why his marriage is still so complicated. Written from Marshall's POV.
“I tried so hard and got so far-
But in the end, it doesn’t even matter.”
--Linkin Park
________________________________________
I tried so hard to move on because as time passed, it was obvious that my feelings for Mary weren’t going to be reciprocated. I tried to leave WitSec on more than one occasion but her eyes, her smile, her voice, and the memory of words uttered in a dusty abandoned gas station haunted me. Words that came so close to the truth, but not close enough. I couldn’t leave her then and I still can’t leave her now.
Abigail doesn’t understand. She thinks that I’m still in love with Mary. I tell my wife over and over that she’s being ridiculous, that I gave Mary up for her, that I love her, that I married her. Somehow, my words aren’t getting through anymore, because Abigail has started to make unannounced visits to the office in the middle of the day. Everyone knows that she’s checking up on me and I’m furious that she doesn’t trust me. Haven’t I proved my loyalty yet? What more do I have to do?
________________________________________
Present Day
I made sure both bedroom doors were closed before I slid the unlock button and answered my phone. “Hey, honey.”
“Are you coming home tonight?”
Straight to the point. “No.”
“I’m sorry?”
“I should have called you sooner, but I figured you would be busy with work-“
“Well, you figured wrong. I’m never too busy to take a call from my husband.”
I collapsed on the sofa. “I’m sorry, Abby. It’s been a really busy day.”
“How’s Nora?”
“She broke her left arm, but otherwise she’s OK. I’m staying here with the kids until Mary gets home on Saturday.”
There was a long pause. “Why?”
“Because everyone else is out of town-“
“So Nora was home alone? Somehow I think Mary’s a better mother than that, Marshall. I’m sure she made arrangements for her child.”
“Nora has a broken arm, Abby, and she’s - I’m keeping her home from school tomorrow. She needs to be with family, not pawned off on the next door neighbor.”
“You’re not family.”
Her words cut me like a knife. “I’m her godfather - look, is there a reason you called? I need to check on the kids.”
“Forgive me for wondering where my husband was. Tell me, is Mary there?”
I lowered my voice, fighting the urge to yell. “No, she’s not. She’s at a hole in the wall motel in Illinois. Why don’t you hang up and call her if you don’t believe me?” I ended the call and turned off my phone, not wanting to deal with her multiple call backs right now. My head jerked up and around when a floorboard creaked behind me. “Nora,” I spoke softly, as I stood and crossed to stand in front of her. “Did I wake you?”
She shook her head. “I had to pee and I heard you talking to someone - who was on the phone?”
“My wife, your Aunt Abigail.”
Nora’s lips pursed in a pout. “I hate her.”
“Nora!” I scolded her as I dropped to one knee in front of her. “That’s not a nice thing to say - about anyone.”
“I know - but it’s true. It’s her fault you weren’t here for Thanksgiving dinner this year-“
“I had to go and see her family in Texas.”
“Why?”
“We’re married - that’s what married people do, go see each other’s families.”
“So she goes to see your family too?”
My lips twitched as I fought to keep the smile off my face. “That’s different - my family isn’t close like hers. It’s complicated.”
Nora tossed her head in such a perfect imitation of Mary that I chuckled. “Complicated - mama uses that word too. Usually when she doesn’t want to explain something to me.”
I tapped Nora on the nose. “You’re a very smart little girl - and it’s way past your bedtime.”
“I can’t sleep,” she shuffled on her feet. “I can’t get comfortable with this thing on.” She waved her arm with the neon green cast in the air. “It itches.”
“I know - I broke my arm when I was your age and I thought the itching would never stop until my big brother showed me a trick.”
“What trick? Can you show me, Uncle Marshall? Please?”
I stood and walked into the kitchen, Nora following on my heels. She watched as I pulled open Mary’s junk drawer and searched inside until I found- “Ah! Here’s one!” I held the object up in triumph.
Nora frowned. “A pencil? What good will that do?”
“You’ll see - hold out your arm, please.”
Nora held out her cast, her eyes full of suspicion. Ever so slowly I slid the pencil up inside and rubbed it across her skin. Nora’s frown melted into a smile and soon she was giggling. “That’s amazing! It’s working! It’s working, Uncle Marshall!”
I scratched her little arm on the underside but was careful to avoid where the actual break was - I didn’t want to make things worse. Slowly I withdrew the pencil and put it back in the drawer. “That’s enough for now - bedtime, love bug.”
“Can I sleep with you?”
Her request melted my heart. Nora was growing up so fast and soon she would be too old for me to honor requests such as this. “I was just going to crash on the couch.”
“Mama won’t mind if you take her bed.”
I grinned. “She won’t, huh?” I knew Mary wouldn’t but to hear the words coming from her five year old daughter cracked me up. “How do you know that?”
“She told me when I talked to her tonight. She said ‘Don’t let Uncle Marshall sleep on the couch, Bug. Tell him to sleep in my room, OK?’”
This time I did laugh as Nora pulled off a perfect impression of Mary. “We’ll have to be very quiet as we change the sheets so we don’t wake George.”
Nora nodded. “Oh, and she also said for you to make chocolate chip pancakes for breakfast.”
My eyes narrowed. “She did not.”
“Uh huh.”
“Your nose is growing, Pinocchio.”
Nora giggled and ran towards Mary’s room as I chased her, my heart full of love. Why do I always want the one thing I can’t have?
________________________________________
Delia knocked on the doorframe of my office. “Chief, there’s a Sgt. Drakini here to see you.”
My head shot up from the file I was studying. “From APD?”
“Yes, but I don’t think he’s here in any official capacity.”
I leaned back in my chair and took the readers off my nose. “What makes you say that?”
“He wanted to know if Mary Shannon, the mother of Nora Shannon was here, and when I said no, he said he wanted a word with you. Said it was about some incident at Nora’s school-“
I was already shrugging my suit jacket on and straightening my tie by the time the words “mother of Nora” had left Delia’s mouth. So Jerry’s father was here and he was a cop. “Where did you put him?”
“In the conference room - careful, boss man, he seems a bit of a loose cannon.”
“Hmm,” was my noncommittal reply as I crossed the floor and opened the door to the fish bowl. “Sargent Drakini? I’m Chief Inspector Mann-“
“Yes, we’ve met.”
I frowned at the stocky athletic man in front of me. Upon closer inspection, the man did look vaguely familiar, but I couldn’t quite-
I snapped my fingers. “Of course! You’re in my wife’s unit, aren’t you? You came to the wedding and our New Year’s Eve Party last year-“
“Yes, me and the wife. Name’s Paul Drakini-“ He held out his hand and we shook. “Look, this is kind of awkward and I was really hoping I could talk to Inspector Shannon about this directly but your receptionist-“
“Delia is an Inspector.”
“Oh, what a lucky guy you are! Rooster in a henhouse, eh?”
The smile slipped from my face. “What can I do for you, Drakini?”
“Well, I don’t know if you’re aware of this, but our kids got into a scrap on the playground yesterday and fact of the matter is, Nora broke my little Jerry’s nose.”
“I’m aware of the situation.”
Paul’s eyebrow’s rose in surprise. “You are?”
“Yes, I’m Nora’s godfather - and since Mary is out of town, the school contacted me after the - altercation.”
“Yeah, well, my kid says that Nora attacked him for no reason - and I’m not going to stand for that. I want to know-“
“You want to know what, Mr. Drakini?” I cut him off, my voice low and soft. “You want to know how Nora is going to be punished for breaking your innocent angel’s nose? You want to know how much Mary Shannon is willing to pay of your son’s medical bills?”
“Well - yeah.”
“Let me tell you what really happened, Paul. Nora was playing on the monkey bars with another friend when your innocent little boy came over and started to tease Nora’s friend about her lisp. Nora and the other girl ignored him. That’s when your innocent Jerry turned his attentions on Nora, and out of the blue called her mother a whore, a word he learned from his father. Now, I want to know something too - do you often talk like that in front of your child? And who is Mary Shannon to you? Do you know her personally? Or is she just someone to gossip about around the water cooler at the APD?”
Paul flushed beet red. “You have no proof that’s what happened - it’s your kid’s word against mine.”
“I don’t think Nora would make up a story like that about her mother - and she’d never heard the word ‘whore’ before yesterday. How can you explain that?”
The other man fidgeted. “Let’s just forget I came here - OK? Jerry’s nose and Nora’s arm will heal and I’m sure the kids will make things up once school starts again next year.” Paul moved towards the door but Marshall stepped into his path.
“So that’s it? Sweep it under the rug all nice and neat?”
“Sure, no harm no foul.”
“Still doesn’t explain why you’re calling Mary Shannon a whore.”
Paul looked at me for a moment in disbelief and then laughed. “Come on, you were her partner for what - ten years before you got promoted? You know her reputation- Shannon will spread her legs for any man who winks at her.”
My pulse was pounding in my ears and I felt my hands clench into fists. I will not punch him. I will NOT punch him. “Really? I thought she’d settled down since having a kid.”
Paul shrugged. “Maybe - but then again, who knows what she does on those frequent road trips out of town, eh? And she claims that this Mark guy is the father of her kid, but between you and me, I bet she doesn’t really know for sure.”
I was seeing red now but Delia poked her head in and said that I had an important call on hold. “Excuse me, Drakini. Delia, please show our guest out.” In an angry daze I stalked to my office and watched from behind the glass as the Sargent was escorted out.
I waited until the elevator doors closed behind him before with a roar of rage, I rammed my fist into the glass wall of my office. The glass cracked but held and I pulled my bloody fist back, staring down at the embedded glass and multiple cuts in my flesh.
Delia came running and stared in shock, first at the large crack, then at my hand. “What the hell? I was trying to prevent you from hitting him - that’s why I interrupted you, Chief. You looked like you were about to blow your stack in there.”
“Well, thank you, Dee. You did save me from hitting his face. Now I just have to pay for the glass and get my hand attended to.”
“What on earth did that man say to you? You’re usually so calm and level headed - it must have been something pretty derogatory.”
I waved my good hand at her. “Leave it alone. It’s nothing, all right?”
She crossed her arms. “Nothing? You tried to put your fist through a glass wall for nothing?”
I shrugged into my coat, cradling my injured hand against my chest. “I’ve been under a lot of stress lately-“
She caught the sleeve of my coat as I passed by. “Do you need someone to talk to? Because I’m here-”
I shook my head. “Thanks, but no. What I need is for you to hold down the fort. I’m headed back to the ER - for me this time. Then I’ll go check on the kids-“
Delia shook her head. “Whose kids?”
“Sorry - Nora and George. I’ll call you once I’m at Mary’s and if it’s quiet I may just take the rest of the day off.”
“Why don’t I just call you if something comes up?”
“Thanks, Dee.”
The elevator doors were sliding closed when Delia held up her hand between them and stuck her face through. “What do I say if your wife calls or stops by?”
I sighed. “She knows where I am - just don’t tell her about me punching the wall.”
________________________________________
“Uncle Mars!”
I dropped my keys on the hall table and turned in time to catch the flying blur of George as he wrapped himself around my legs. “Hey Sport! I’ve only been gone for half a day-“
“But in child time that’s like a week, Marshall.” Joanna laughed at me from the couch where she was playing ‘Go Fish’ with Nora.
“Why are you home so soon?” Nora demanded, not taking her eyes off her cards. “Do you have any 3’s?”
Joanna shook her head. “Go fish.”
I moaned. “One of you is ecstatic I’m home and the other is wondering why I’m here - hmm, what’s wrong with this picture?” I swung George up into my arms, ignoring the stinging sensations that the action provoked in my injured hand. “I thought I’d come home for lunch - is that OK with all of you?”
“Jo-Jo made lasagna,” Nora set her cards on the table and came over to me, her eyes zeroing in on my bandaged hand. “Uncle Marshall, what happened to your hand?”
“An on the job injury, love bug, it’s fine, nothing for you to worry about.”
“You’re lying.”
“Nora!” Joanna gasped.
“Well, he is! I can always tell when Uncle Marshall is lying.”
“How?” I asked in amusement.
“You don’t look me in the eyes - you look at my forehead or the tip of my nose, but not in my eyes.”
Joanna laughed. “You’re busted, Marshall.”
I set George down and he ran off into the other room, whooping all the way. Kneeling down beside her, I was careful to lock eyes with her. “I am OK, Nora, I promise. But as to what happened, well, it’s-“
“Complicated?” Nora grinned.
I reached out and gently pulled on one of her pigtails. “See? Too smart for your own good.”
The doorbell rang and interrupted our moment.
“I get it!” George yelled as he ran past me.
“Wait up, Sport. You can’t just answer the door without an adult-“ I grabbed hold of his overalls. “It’s not safe, OK?”
George nodded somberly.
I chuckled as I swung open the door to see Abigail standing on the doorstep.
“Abby, what are you-“
“Marshall, where the hell have you been? I’ve been all over town looking for you! I went to the office and saw the damage and Delia wouldn’t tell me anything. What the hell happened at work today?”
“Abby, please,” I hushed her as I motioned to a wide eyed George in my arms and both of us looked down to see Nora peeking around from behind my hip.
“Nora, how are you?” Abigail smiled at her.
“Fine.”
I set George down next to his cousin. “Nora, why don’t you go back inside and check on that lasagna with Jo Jo?”
Nora took George’s hand. “What about you?”
“I’ll be there in a minute.”
Nora looked from me to Abigail and back to me again. “You’re not leaving with her?”
I heard Abigail gasp behind me as I shook my head. “I’m staying until your mom gets home tomorrow, remember?”
“OK, as long as she knows that. Come on, Georgie.”
I stepped onto the small porch and shut the front door behind me.
“I can’t believe you’re letting a five year old dictate your life.”
“She’s not - I told Mary I would stay until she got home and I’m not going back on my word.”
“Of course not, the great Marshall Mann never breaks a promise to Mary Shannon.”
I blew out a breath. “I’ve never broken one to you either. Abigail, I think you need to go back to work, or go home and get some rest. If you stay, one or both of us is going to say something we’ll regret.”
“Not until you tell me what happened at the office. Did a witness do that?”
“No.” I swallowed. “I did.”
“What - why?”
“I’ve been under a lot of pressure lately and I guess I just needed to blow off some steam-“
She stared at me for a long moment before throwing back her head and laughing. “Come on, Marshall, this is me, your wife. You can’t fool me with that BS. Something or someone really got under your skin and I’m betting it has something to do with Mary because if it was anything else, you’d just come right out and tell me.”
“Abby-“
“I knew it. This is about her! It’s always about her.”
“Will you keep your voice down, please?” I darted an anxious glance over my shoulder at the house. “It’s something that has to do with Mary, yes, but not the way you think - it’s about what happened to Nora yesterday at school-“
Abigail turned and walked away. “I don’t want to hear it, Marshall. I’m tired of your excuses and rationalizations. I’m tired of waiting for you to put us and our relationship first.”
I caught up to her and swung her around to face me. “What are you talking about? I’ve done nothing but - haven’t I proven over and over to you how committed I am to our marriage? What more do you want from me?”
“I need to know I can trust you. I need to know that when you’re at the office with her, the two of you aren’t sneaking off to-“ Abigail’s voice broke.
“Abby! Mary and I have never had sex - not before our marriage and definitely not after. I don’t know what more I can do or say to convince you. If you don’t trust me, then-“ I shrugged and dropped my hands.
She wrapped her arms around her shoulders, trying to recapture the warmth from my hands. “That’s just it, Marshall. I don’t trust you - not with her. And I don’t know if I ever can.”
Prompt: Why do you always want the one thing you can't have? Unrequited/requited love. M&M. ANGST
Summary: Three years after his marriage to Abigail, Marshall wonders why his marriage is still so complicated. Written from Marshall's POV.
“I tried so hard and got so far-
But in the end, it doesn’t even matter.”
--Linkin Park
________________________________________
I tried so hard to move on because as time passed, it was obvious that my feelings for Mary weren’t going to be reciprocated. I tried to leave WitSec on more than one occasion but her eyes, her smile, her voice, and the memory of words uttered in a dusty abandoned gas station haunted me. Words that came so close to the truth, but not close enough. I couldn’t leave her then and I still can’t leave her now.
Abigail doesn’t understand. She thinks that I’m still in love with Mary. I tell my wife over and over that she’s being ridiculous, that I gave Mary up for her, that I love her, that I married her. Somehow, my words aren’t getting through anymore, because Abigail has started to make unannounced visits to the office in the middle of the day. Everyone knows that she’s checking up on me and I’m furious that she doesn’t trust me. Haven’t I proved my loyalty yet? What more do I have to do?
________________________________________
Present Day
I made sure both bedroom doors were closed before I slid the unlock button and answered my phone. “Hey, honey.”
“Are you coming home tonight?”
Straight to the point. “No.”
“I’m sorry?”
“I should have called you sooner, but I figured you would be busy with work-“
“Well, you figured wrong. I’m never too busy to take a call from my husband.”
I collapsed on the sofa. “I’m sorry, Abby. It’s been a really busy day.”
“How’s Nora?”
“She broke her left arm, but otherwise she’s OK. I’m staying here with the kids until Mary gets home on Saturday.”
There was a long pause. “Why?”
“Because everyone else is out of town-“
“So Nora was home alone? Somehow I think Mary’s a better mother than that, Marshall. I’m sure she made arrangements for her child.”
“Nora has a broken arm, Abby, and she’s - I’m keeping her home from school tomorrow. She needs to be with family, not pawned off on the next door neighbor.”
“You’re not family.”
Her words cut me like a knife. “I’m her godfather - look, is there a reason you called? I need to check on the kids.”
“Forgive me for wondering where my husband was. Tell me, is Mary there?”
I lowered my voice, fighting the urge to yell. “No, she’s not. She’s at a hole in the wall motel in Illinois. Why don’t you hang up and call her if you don’t believe me?” I ended the call and turned off my phone, not wanting to deal with her multiple call backs right now. My head jerked up and around when a floorboard creaked behind me. “Nora,” I spoke softly, as I stood and crossed to stand in front of her. “Did I wake you?”
She shook her head. “I had to pee and I heard you talking to someone - who was on the phone?”
“My wife, your Aunt Abigail.”
Nora’s lips pursed in a pout. “I hate her.”
“Nora!” I scolded her as I dropped to one knee in front of her. “That’s not a nice thing to say - about anyone.”
“I know - but it’s true. It’s her fault you weren’t here for Thanksgiving dinner this year-“
“I had to go and see her family in Texas.”
“Why?”
“We’re married - that’s what married people do, go see each other’s families.”
“So she goes to see your family too?”
My lips twitched as I fought to keep the smile off my face. “That’s different - my family isn’t close like hers. It’s complicated.”
Nora tossed her head in such a perfect imitation of Mary that I chuckled. “Complicated - mama uses that word too. Usually when she doesn’t want to explain something to me.”
I tapped Nora on the nose. “You’re a very smart little girl - and it’s way past your bedtime.”
“I can’t sleep,” she shuffled on her feet. “I can’t get comfortable with this thing on.” She waved her arm with the neon green cast in the air. “It itches.”
“I know - I broke my arm when I was your age and I thought the itching would never stop until my big brother showed me a trick.”
“What trick? Can you show me, Uncle Marshall? Please?”
I stood and walked into the kitchen, Nora following on my heels. She watched as I pulled open Mary’s junk drawer and searched inside until I found- “Ah! Here’s one!” I held the object up in triumph.
Nora frowned. “A pencil? What good will that do?”
“You’ll see - hold out your arm, please.”
Nora held out her cast, her eyes full of suspicion. Ever so slowly I slid the pencil up inside and rubbed it across her skin. Nora’s frown melted into a smile and soon she was giggling. “That’s amazing! It’s working! It’s working, Uncle Marshall!”
I scratched her little arm on the underside but was careful to avoid where the actual break was - I didn’t want to make things worse. Slowly I withdrew the pencil and put it back in the drawer. “That’s enough for now - bedtime, love bug.”
“Can I sleep with you?”
Her request melted my heart. Nora was growing up so fast and soon she would be too old for me to honor requests such as this. “I was just going to crash on the couch.”
“Mama won’t mind if you take her bed.”
I grinned. “She won’t, huh?” I knew Mary wouldn’t but to hear the words coming from her five year old daughter cracked me up. “How do you know that?”
“She told me when I talked to her tonight. She said ‘Don’t let Uncle Marshall sleep on the couch, Bug. Tell him to sleep in my room, OK?’”
This time I did laugh as Nora pulled off a perfect impression of Mary. “We’ll have to be very quiet as we change the sheets so we don’t wake George.”
Nora nodded. “Oh, and she also said for you to make chocolate chip pancakes for breakfast.”
My eyes narrowed. “She did not.”
“Uh huh.”
“Your nose is growing, Pinocchio.”
Nora giggled and ran towards Mary’s room as I chased her, my heart full of love. Why do I always want the one thing I can’t have?
________________________________________
Delia knocked on the doorframe of my office. “Chief, there’s a Sgt. Drakini here to see you.”
My head shot up from the file I was studying. “From APD?”
“Yes, but I don’t think he’s here in any official capacity.”
I leaned back in my chair and took the readers off my nose. “What makes you say that?”
“He wanted to know if Mary Shannon, the mother of Nora Shannon was here, and when I said no, he said he wanted a word with you. Said it was about some incident at Nora’s school-“
I was already shrugging my suit jacket on and straightening my tie by the time the words “mother of Nora” had left Delia’s mouth. So Jerry’s father was here and he was a cop. “Where did you put him?”
“In the conference room - careful, boss man, he seems a bit of a loose cannon.”
“Hmm,” was my noncommittal reply as I crossed the floor and opened the door to the fish bowl. “Sargent Drakini? I’m Chief Inspector Mann-“
“Yes, we’ve met.”
I frowned at the stocky athletic man in front of me. Upon closer inspection, the man did look vaguely familiar, but I couldn’t quite-
I snapped my fingers. “Of course! You’re in my wife’s unit, aren’t you? You came to the wedding and our New Year’s Eve Party last year-“
“Yes, me and the wife. Name’s Paul Drakini-“ He held out his hand and we shook. “Look, this is kind of awkward and I was really hoping I could talk to Inspector Shannon about this directly but your receptionist-“
“Delia is an Inspector.”
“Oh, what a lucky guy you are! Rooster in a henhouse, eh?”
The smile slipped from my face. “What can I do for you, Drakini?”
“Well, I don’t know if you’re aware of this, but our kids got into a scrap on the playground yesterday and fact of the matter is, Nora broke my little Jerry’s nose.”
“I’m aware of the situation.”
Paul’s eyebrow’s rose in surprise. “You are?”
“Yes, I’m Nora’s godfather - and since Mary is out of town, the school contacted me after the - altercation.”
“Yeah, well, my kid says that Nora attacked him for no reason - and I’m not going to stand for that. I want to know-“
“You want to know what, Mr. Drakini?” I cut him off, my voice low and soft. “You want to know how Nora is going to be punished for breaking your innocent angel’s nose? You want to know how much Mary Shannon is willing to pay of your son’s medical bills?”
“Well - yeah.”
“Let me tell you what really happened, Paul. Nora was playing on the monkey bars with another friend when your innocent little boy came over and started to tease Nora’s friend about her lisp. Nora and the other girl ignored him. That’s when your innocent Jerry turned his attentions on Nora, and out of the blue called her mother a whore, a word he learned from his father. Now, I want to know something too - do you often talk like that in front of your child? And who is Mary Shannon to you? Do you know her personally? Or is she just someone to gossip about around the water cooler at the APD?”
Paul flushed beet red. “You have no proof that’s what happened - it’s your kid’s word against mine.”
“I don’t think Nora would make up a story like that about her mother - and she’d never heard the word ‘whore’ before yesterday. How can you explain that?”
The other man fidgeted. “Let’s just forget I came here - OK? Jerry’s nose and Nora’s arm will heal and I’m sure the kids will make things up once school starts again next year.” Paul moved towards the door but Marshall stepped into his path.
“So that’s it? Sweep it under the rug all nice and neat?”
“Sure, no harm no foul.”
“Still doesn’t explain why you’re calling Mary Shannon a whore.”
Paul looked at me for a moment in disbelief and then laughed. “Come on, you were her partner for what - ten years before you got promoted? You know her reputation- Shannon will spread her legs for any man who winks at her.”
My pulse was pounding in my ears and I felt my hands clench into fists. I will not punch him. I will NOT punch him. “Really? I thought she’d settled down since having a kid.”
Paul shrugged. “Maybe - but then again, who knows what she does on those frequent road trips out of town, eh? And she claims that this Mark guy is the father of her kid, but between you and me, I bet she doesn’t really know for sure.”
I was seeing red now but Delia poked her head in and said that I had an important call on hold. “Excuse me, Drakini. Delia, please show our guest out.” In an angry daze I stalked to my office and watched from behind the glass as the Sargent was escorted out.
I waited until the elevator doors closed behind him before with a roar of rage, I rammed my fist into the glass wall of my office. The glass cracked but held and I pulled my bloody fist back, staring down at the embedded glass and multiple cuts in my flesh.
Delia came running and stared in shock, first at the large crack, then at my hand. “What the hell? I was trying to prevent you from hitting him - that’s why I interrupted you, Chief. You looked like you were about to blow your stack in there.”
“Well, thank you, Dee. You did save me from hitting his face. Now I just have to pay for the glass and get my hand attended to.”
“What on earth did that man say to you? You’re usually so calm and level headed - it must have been something pretty derogatory.”
I waved my good hand at her. “Leave it alone. It’s nothing, all right?”
She crossed her arms. “Nothing? You tried to put your fist through a glass wall for nothing?”
I shrugged into my coat, cradling my injured hand against my chest. “I’ve been under a lot of stress lately-“
She caught the sleeve of my coat as I passed by. “Do you need someone to talk to? Because I’m here-”
I shook my head. “Thanks, but no. What I need is for you to hold down the fort. I’m headed back to the ER - for me this time. Then I’ll go check on the kids-“
Delia shook her head. “Whose kids?”
“Sorry - Nora and George. I’ll call you once I’m at Mary’s and if it’s quiet I may just take the rest of the day off.”
“Why don’t I just call you if something comes up?”
“Thanks, Dee.”
The elevator doors were sliding closed when Delia held up her hand between them and stuck her face through. “What do I say if your wife calls or stops by?”
I sighed. “She knows where I am - just don’t tell her about me punching the wall.”
________________________________________
“Uncle Mars!”
I dropped my keys on the hall table and turned in time to catch the flying blur of George as he wrapped himself around my legs. “Hey Sport! I’ve only been gone for half a day-“
“But in child time that’s like a week, Marshall.” Joanna laughed at me from the couch where she was playing ‘Go Fish’ with Nora.
“Why are you home so soon?” Nora demanded, not taking her eyes off her cards. “Do you have any 3’s?”
Joanna shook her head. “Go fish.”
I moaned. “One of you is ecstatic I’m home and the other is wondering why I’m here - hmm, what’s wrong with this picture?” I swung George up into my arms, ignoring the stinging sensations that the action provoked in my injured hand. “I thought I’d come home for lunch - is that OK with all of you?”
“Jo-Jo made lasagna,” Nora set her cards on the table and came over to me, her eyes zeroing in on my bandaged hand. “Uncle Marshall, what happened to your hand?”
“An on the job injury, love bug, it’s fine, nothing for you to worry about.”
“You’re lying.”
“Nora!” Joanna gasped.
“Well, he is! I can always tell when Uncle Marshall is lying.”
“How?” I asked in amusement.
“You don’t look me in the eyes - you look at my forehead or the tip of my nose, but not in my eyes.”
Joanna laughed. “You’re busted, Marshall.”
I set George down and he ran off into the other room, whooping all the way. Kneeling down beside her, I was careful to lock eyes with her. “I am OK, Nora, I promise. But as to what happened, well, it’s-“
“Complicated?” Nora grinned.
I reached out and gently pulled on one of her pigtails. “See? Too smart for your own good.”
The doorbell rang and interrupted our moment.
“I get it!” George yelled as he ran past me.
“Wait up, Sport. You can’t just answer the door without an adult-“ I grabbed hold of his overalls. “It’s not safe, OK?”
George nodded somberly.
I chuckled as I swung open the door to see Abigail standing on the doorstep.
“Abby, what are you-“
“Marshall, where the hell have you been? I’ve been all over town looking for you! I went to the office and saw the damage and Delia wouldn’t tell me anything. What the hell happened at work today?”
“Abby, please,” I hushed her as I motioned to a wide eyed George in my arms and both of us looked down to see Nora peeking around from behind my hip.
“Nora, how are you?” Abigail smiled at her.
“Fine.”
I set George down next to his cousin. “Nora, why don’t you go back inside and check on that lasagna with Jo Jo?”
Nora took George’s hand. “What about you?”
“I’ll be there in a minute.”
Nora looked from me to Abigail and back to me again. “You’re not leaving with her?”
I heard Abigail gasp behind me as I shook my head. “I’m staying until your mom gets home tomorrow, remember?”
“OK, as long as she knows that. Come on, Georgie.”
I stepped onto the small porch and shut the front door behind me.
“I can’t believe you’re letting a five year old dictate your life.”
“She’s not - I told Mary I would stay until she got home and I’m not going back on my word.”
“Of course not, the great Marshall Mann never breaks a promise to Mary Shannon.”
I blew out a breath. “I’ve never broken one to you either. Abigail, I think you need to go back to work, or go home and get some rest. If you stay, one or both of us is going to say something we’ll regret.”
“Not until you tell me what happened at the office. Did a witness do that?”
“No.” I swallowed. “I did.”
“What - why?”
“I’ve been under a lot of pressure lately and I guess I just needed to blow off some steam-“
She stared at me for a long moment before throwing back her head and laughing. “Come on, Marshall, this is me, your wife. You can’t fool me with that BS. Something or someone really got under your skin and I’m betting it has something to do with Mary because if it was anything else, you’d just come right out and tell me.”
“Abby-“
“I knew it. This is about her! It’s always about her.”
“Will you keep your voice down, please?” I darted an anxious glance over my shoulder at the house. “It’s something that has to do with Mary, yes, but not the way you think - it’s about what happened to Nora yesterday at school-“
Abigail turned and walked away. “I don’t want to hear it, Marshall. I’m tired of your excuses and rationalizations. I’m tired of waiting for you to put us and our relationship first.”
I caught up to her and swung her around to face me. “What are you talking about? I’ve done nothing but - haven’t I proven over and over to you how committed I am to our marriage? What more do you want from me?”
“I need to know I can trust you. I need to know that when you’re at the office with her, the two of you aren’t sneaking off to-“ Abigail’s voice broke.
“Abby! Mary and I have never had sex - not before our marriage and definitely not after. I don’t know what more I can do or say to convince you. If you don’t trust me, then-“ I shrugged and dropped my hands.
She wrapped her arms around her shoulders, trying to recapture the warmth from my hands. “That’s just it, Marshall. I don’t trust you - not with her. And I don’t know if I ever can.”