They can't hurt you if you're already broken [ 1/? ]

[marley_bean]

Comments

[zippy88]

I really like the style of this, with the fuller paragraphs coupled with a single, significant sentence that carries a lot of weight. I think you've done well with Kate's character as well, and I'm really interested in how you're going to develop her as the story unfolds. I really enjoyed reading this, so I hope you'll continue this :)

[marley_bean]

Thank you so much for your comment!
I've got to admit this is a little new and scary haha! I've only ever written essays and such (didn't pick up creative writing again til this past year), I hope I can continue and develop the story and characters adequately :)

[zippy88]

I'm sure you'll do just fine from looking at your start, so don't worry :) I'm really looking forward to reading more.

[rinleonhart]

"Kate couldn’t help feel the austerity was merely a convenient façade, hiding the fact she wasn’t really that strong. Wasn’t really that detached. That she was just as scared and fragile as everyone else."

I just really loved that bit. Write more! :D

[marley_bean]

thank ya' muchly! And I will write more, working on it right now ;)

[scrolllocke]

"She could be telling you the sky was falling and you wouldn’t give a shit because of that voice."

Love that line. Totally true. I'm also digging the short lines that carry importance. Keep going!

[marley_bean]

I think that's my favorite characteristic of Juliet, she's so blunt but its like...damn that voice makes me melt!

:)

[ebette]

I could tell just by the first paragraph with how you wrote that this was going to be a good fic! The way you captured Kates thoughts about Juliet are believable. I am excited to see where this is going, please update soon!!!!

Re: :)

[ebette]

P.S ... I love the title, and your image for the story!!

Re: :)

[marley_bean]

:D *hugs* thanks so much!!