Image.

[margaretc]

So asim posted this thing about shoes, and I just got my hair 'done' Tuesday, and I'm still fuming over a doctor telling me that I could lose 20 pounds just by changing what I eat even though walking down the hall to get a drink of water is a bit much for me right now, all of which adds up to a post about self-image and body-consciousness

Comments

[syaldia]

I know what you mean, as it's the general area I tend to live in. And then something happens for a few months and I do the strange girly thing, and when I come back out of it I'm very confused as to what the point was.

[margaretc]

I'm not sure if there are only the two points of "girly" vs. "plain/frumpy". There has to be something else, right? I don't know. I'll know it when I find it, though.

[herveus]

Frumpy is not necessarily a Bad Thing. In the eye of a beholder, it may even be sexy. It certainly can be attractive. If you are comfortable with it, it enhances attractiveness (and/or sexiness). If you fight it, it will probably show, and that generally doesn't help. Simply being comfortable with yourself and showing a hint of a smile are hugely beneficial

[margaretc]

See above reply. Why can't there be comfortable==attractive? Why do they have to be opposites?
Very thoughtful reply, by the way. Thank you.

[herveus]

I don't count them as opposites. Attractiveness is a cloud of points characterized by a number of dimensions. One of those dimensions is "comfortableness". I'd say that it affects attractiveness, but does not define it.

[baronalejandro]

But I'm starting to wonder if I might want to change that some day, and if so, how.

It's not that hard. I did it - or at least I believe I did.

[margaretc]

Dude, you're starting to scare me a little bit with the aggressive workout schedule and the power-eating and protein-packing and so on. Just don't get addicted to exercise or something goofy like that.
Start riding a bicycle to work, by the way- it's not that far, esp. if you take Campus Dr. from East.

Anyway, I did kind of try to ask you for help, but nothing's come of it yet. I suspect I need to be dragged to change.

[baronalejandro]

You did? My obtuseness again. Check your email!

[baronalejandro]

Oh, and about the exercise/eating/blah blah blah/ thing - Keep in mind, that I"m working towards a very specific goal in regards to that. It has an end date.

You should have seen me when I was hardcore training for fencing.

[francesca_la]

The sexiest thing ever... is self confidence. Believing in oneself. And for me, that's HARD. Have to work on it all the time. All the nice dresses, shoes and hair in the world cannot make you sexy if the attutude sucketh. :-) The hair color's a great start, btw. Adventuring out into the unknown... can be much fun. Alejandro is GREAT at dressing folks up... really. Much fun to watch him pick out clothes. As to the idea being foreign... well you like foreign travelling, right? Can you think of it like that kind of adventure? :-)!!!

[wakeupmagy]

Amen to that! Sexy is a state of mind. Attractive is a state of mind. It has nothing to do with how you look, but it all boils down to how you feel about yourself. Confidence is the key. Otherwise, all the "not pretty" people in the world would be sitting around all lonely. It's all in the attitude!

[40sw]

so, does this mean you're the one of my friends who sees in the mirror what she expects to see in the mirror rather than finding a bafflingly old, fat stranger that doesn't look like your image of yourself?

I mean, if it's true, is that good or bad?

& are you still disappointed by what a mirror says even if it isn't any worse than you expect to look?

[margaretc]

There are days when I'm not startled by what I see in the mirror, but it's not that often. I'm usually surprised that I'm as attractive as I appear to be, because I definitely don't feel that. How's that for pitiful? I mean, I'm surprised that I'm not fatter and uglier and older. So I guess I've passed myself up somewhere in there.
Bleah.