(Untitled)

[malecrit]

I'm not really sure what's up with this. There's more of me in this than I'd care to admit. And it's probably awful. /disclaimer

Comments

[occultebelta]

Ooh. I like this characterization of Bellatrix - I don't see one like this very often. <3

[malecrit]

Thanks, Bee. :) I'm not really thrilled with how this came out, but I just wanted to do *something* with how scared out of her wits she probably is, in addition to her being ignorant/crazy/evil.

[occultebelta]

*nods* I understand what you mean. A little more length in the second section may even that out - it felt a bit too jumpy, even for this style. Then again, that may be me, being long-winded. :)

[malecrit]

Thanks for the suggestion! I think I'll revise/expand on this later after I finish some other things that need to be written...

[theo_fabula]

I quite liked it. A softer Bellatrix than what I've generally seen, but it's a very nice contradiction. When you remove the haze of the madness there are only fears and doubts, the cards, the tea, the crystal ball.

Just one nitpicky note; in case it slips you again -
when Sirius bumps his mother

[malecrit]

Thanks. It's a different Bellatrix from the one I'm used to (the one I RP, anyway), too.

I don't mean to be completely dense, but I'm not sure what you're nitpicking.

[theo_fabula]

Erm, I assumed it should have been 'bumps into'. But am not native, so maybe there's not so much difference between the two then.

[malecrit]

Oh! I see. :) I'm pretty sure 'into' is optional (although now that you mention it, maybe it's more correct to include it?), but I might go ahead and add it in. Thanks.