(Untitled)

[malecrit]

Er. I know it's bad form to post something unfinished, and I'm like 90% sure that this is just that, and it wanders and I'm generally unsure about it, but I want feedback, so nyah. This is for pogrebin (apologies, dear, for, um, cramping your style and dedicating horrible writing to you) and (sort of) for the fiftieth anniversary of the discovery of the

Comments

[kaesa]

That was very cool.

Well, okay, I won't leave it at that. "Cool" isn't the kind of review one should give. It was powerful. It was neato. I liked the use of quotes and the great comparisons of Harry and Tom/Voldemort. I particularly liked the idea that the serpent and the phoenix are really representative of the same thing - death and rebirth - although, you know, snakes are seen as that even without the eating-the-tail thing.

I liked the end. I know it's open, but that's because you stuck with your theme in it, and your theme is that there is no end, ever, so there's really no way for it to be closed.

One little nitpicky thing, however: "straight as a strand of DNA" would be curved up horribly, then twisted around an octamer and clipped on with a histone, wouldn't it? (Spellings subject to change, of course). Other than that, I loved it.

Re:

[malecrit]

Thanks for the feedback.

I'm glad the end worked for you, since I basically just got to a point where I went, "I'm out of quotes and I don't know what else to write! Fuck it!"

And, er, yeah, you're right about the DNA bits. It's been too many years since I went to DNA science summer camp, and I think I have a tendency to imagine them being all lined up during mitosis, instead of when they're curled up during the other phases whose names I can't remember. *makes note to fix things during editing*

Thanks again!

Re:

[kaesa]

'Sokay. I'm at DNA science camp. The stuff's hell to purify, I don't know how the Death Eaters are going to manage. I'm going to have nightmares about centrifuges tonight. And buffer solutions. ::shudder:: Ones that eat away at your skin if you aren't wearing gloves.

Re:

[malecrit]

Ew, buffer solutions. Are you going to run a gel electrophoresis ... thing? I always thought those were pretty neat.

[biichan]

God. That was So. Fucking. Cool.

(I could say more but that pretty much sums it up.)

[malecrit]

Thank you! *blushes madly*

[biichan]

Anytime.

We've got Dolores Umbridge in the game now. Seventh year Hufflepuff prefect and the bane of Sybill Trelawney's existence.

Ph34r the Dotty Dolly!

[malecrit]

I love Dotty Dolly already! Well, in a love-to-hate-her sort of way.

*sigh* I really need to prod Eleanor into action now.

[bentley]

I believe people have already stated that was cool, so I shall just say excellent and well done, especially on the Beckett quotes and But do two halfbloods create wholeblood, or is it simply continuing degradation?, which is something I have wondered for a while.

Brilliant writing skills, and I adored it.

[malecrit]

Thank you, Greenie!

[malecrit]

Thanks! And I'm very glad to hear that your Tom approves, too.

[luminousmarble]

In the forests of Albania, Tom Riddle is coaxing the serpent to eat its tail.

Word.

Wowee.

Whee.

I... am still in stupid!reviewer mode, but I can safely say that I loved the tone and style. I actually like the ending as well, because it reiterates (ha) what I think you're saying, in essence: that everything is circular. That cycles repeat. I don't, actually, find that fatalistic -- rather, it's the natural order of things.

[malecrit]

Yay, thank you!