Fic: Someday, Maybe

[jazzfic]

Title: Someday, Maybe
Authors: jazzfic, fireworkfiasco and ninamazing
Rating: R
Pairing: Mal/River
Words: 10,158
Disclaimer: Joss is Boss. But we love him anyway.
Summary: Of hardened space captains, reader-girls, and an understanding that falls a little left of centre.
Notes: This started life as a series of drabbles to while away an otherwise dull afternoon, but it soon took

Comments

[damiarvn]

that was gorgeous, but my favorite part was this:

"I have a name, you know." He smiled weakly.

"Yes."

"Would you kindly use it, darlin'?"

"No."

This was spoken one breath away from his lips. And, soon enough, he had forgotten words all together.

just beautiful.

[jazzfic]

Thankyou from me as well...I'm so glad you liked it :)

[gwenfrewi72]

I have to say, I enjoyed this as much this time as I did the first time I wandered over onto it.

Loved all of it, especially Mal naming her Darling. Just gives me a big happy.

Hugs to all 3 of you for an excellent job!

[jazzfic]

*snort*

And there I was getting all exited when I opened my email...*g*

[raincitygirl]

Oh, this is just cool.

[evilfirepixie8]

Oh, it's been a long time since I've read a story that moved me quite like this one. Beautiful work.

[sawasdeekha]

drawling her words like little Kaylee and smiling like exotic Inara and making cracks like warrior Zoe.

I love how this encapsulated their differences neatly and naturally.

"No," River said. "You're going to pay. Because you're captain of a great ship, and that great ship runs by Kaylee's love as well as yours. And she's deserving. And--" She leaned up, kissed him on the cheek, "--because I told you to."

With that she disappeared into the crowd. Mal stared blankly after her. Words of displeasure made their way onto his lips, but all he could manage was, "Huh."

Well, she's just got him wrapped round her itty bitty finger and he knows it! - Love this whole section and the image it gives of their relationship!

"Vendor took a shining to you, I'm thinking, cause he let me have them for free."

River's eyes widened and she took a step closer to him. "Captain, the man has four daughters at home!"

"Which is why I left him a generous tip."

Her smile grew. "You may think you're a mean old man, but your heart says different."

Well, we

[jazzfic]

Well, I'm seconding fireworkfiasco's appreciation for such nicely thought out feedback!

The only way I can describe it (and it's not quite right - not exactly what I mean and purely a personal interpretation), is that it's tone is sad. And I don't know why, because it's not a sad story, at all, in any way.

That's interesting. It certainly didn't really have an 'arc' of sorts, as it was never intended to really go anywhere as far as an actual story was concerned. I'm not sure I can offer any explanation either! I always love seeing how different readers interpret things, though, so thanks for the comment.

Glad you enjoyed it!

[sawasdeekha]

Thanks both of you for replying - because you are right about the end point. I think the reason I thought it was sad was because it felt like it was building up to something, and because everything had gone well so far, my perverse nature was expecting the rug to be pulled out from under me and River would die or something!

Thanks so much for putting your finger(s) on the point i was trying - badly - to make. I've read it again and now it has a much different feel to it. Since I wasn't trying to work out what was bothering me, I found many other little gems within the whole.

So, still loving it, but in a much happier way now!