New Story: Intemperance 2/2

[madoldmrsfigg]

Title: Intemperance (Part Two)
Author: madoldmrsfigg
Summary: “Then don’t you think, a small voice inside Hermione’s head piped up, that Ron would want that side of you, too?”
Rating: NC-17
Feedback: Very much appreciated. Either comment or at weasleyisourking @ hotmail.com
Notes: Written for lysrouge in the Second Ron Fic A Thon. She requested: Ron/Hermione. 1. D/s

Comments

[cantabile]

That was lovely. I really like how your Hermione and your Ron are so good with each other. That she'd snuck away his clothes was great, I could see her doing something like that.

[madoldmrsfigg]

Thank you! I invisage Ron and Hermione to be like that with each other, after the way they seemed to mature in OotP, and be more tolerant of each other. And the clothes... hell, can you blame her? ;D

[binzer611]

Oh man, that was delightful! Wow, well done, Amy! Made me miss Kenny ;) The smell thing, you hit that right on. I love the way Kenny smells, even when he's dirty and sweaty. He came back from a 10 day camping trip once, hadn't showered the entire time (had only been swimming) and I couldn't get enough of it. Weird and kinda yucky, I know, but I can't help it. Anyway, that story was wonderful...it really made me wish summer would hurry the hell up!

[madoldmrsfigg]

Thanks loads Linz! I really appreciate it. :)

And no, I don't reckon that's yucky, for the record. ;)

I know... summer, HBP... *stares miserably out at British weather*

[clwshorty01]

Wow! That was so hot! Geez...

Now, a helpful piece of concrit: You change verb tenses quite often (from past to present and back) so that it can be a bit distracting and disorienting at times. Other than that, perfect!

Cathy

[madoldmrsfigg]

Thanks very much!

And I really appreciate the concrit. As it was for a challenge deadline, I only had the first half betaed, and I was struggling, I admit, with the verb tenses. I worried about that... so thanks, it's really helpful to know where I went wrong. :) Anything in particular for me to correct?

And thanks again. :D

[shocolate]

*swallows*

Fuck, she's a lucky girl!

Ron stumbles forward more, and dropped to his knees in front of her, his eyes raking all over her body

*swallows*

[madoldmrsfigg]

Damn right she is - I clever one too. :P

Thanks! Means a lot, coming from the Queen of Smut, such as yourself...

[elanor_sarah]

I liked how you had Hermione dominating- I liked her let loose side and the way she was still in character with being slightly shy at the start.

and damn hot too ;)

[lilmisstwirly]

UM....wonderful!!! This is definately the HOTTEST r/h piece I've read in months! They're so in character!
Awesome

[madoldmrsfigg]

Thank you! I'd wonderful to know that they're in character - that's the most important thing to achieve, for me. And that was my first piece of smut so - yeah. Cool. :D

Thanks for reviewing.