Interview Part 2 [Harry/Draco]
Title: Interview Part 2
Author: iP
Pairing: Harry/Draco
Genre: Crack. *cough*
Rating: Um. Let’s just think of it as a PG-13 one. Hah.
Flame?: NO.
Disclaimer: J.K. owns the characters. Sigh.
Summary: And so the interview continues…
A.N.: I advise you to read the part 1 before this. Kies? :D
part 1
*****
Harry: (stares blankly into space) Um…hello…we’re back!
Draco: What the hell?
Harry: (looks around blindly) Why is everything so dark?
Draco: Meh. I guess this is one of the things the author did.
Harry: AUTHOR!
Draco: (hits Harry on the back) Stop it.
Harry: At least I’m doing something.
Draco: (winks) Well, we could do other things, y’know…
Good day, my lads. This is your author. Actually, the male version. Counterpart. Yeah. ‘Tis me.
Harry: (rolls eyes) And so?
Ahem. I am regretful to say that nobody asked you any questions…
Draco: (eyebrows meet) WHAT?!?
Harry: No one?
Draco: Does that mean-
Yes, Draco. You two suck. Suckers!
Harry: Hey! No fair!
Draco: (looks at you O_O reader) Why did you not ask us a question? We’d answer it! Don’t tell me you don’t believe us? Malfoys have one word!
Harry: (shakes head) Malfoy, I’m afraid the Harry Potter phenomenon had actually… went down a bit. Popularity loss.
Draco: (shakes Harry) WHAT POPULARITY LOSS??
Harry: What? I just think the people’s affection for Harry Potter decreased.
Draco: OF COURSE THEY DECREASED! Because Draco Malfoy appreciation inflation rate increased to a hundred percent! MUAHAHAHA!
Harry: Shut up.
Draco: (looks at you reader again O.O) Reader! Tell me, who do you like more? That four-eyed git or the smooth, sexy, suave me, Draco Malfoy the great?
Harry: (butts in) Of course they’ll choose me.
Draco: How could you prove that? I’ve got a much much nicer body than yours, and besides-
Harry: You still shag me.
Draco: (sputters) NOT. TRUE.!
Harry: (rolls eyes) Just because it was sadomasochism and you get to dominate me, you ABUSED it!
Draco: (red in the face) Did NOT!
Harry: Yes you did. The shag scene was supposed to last only for two minutes but instead it became three! I was bound and you were shoving it all the way IN!
Draco: NOT!
Harry (whistles) I always had a feeling that you fancied me, Malfoy. Must I tell you that I don’t like gays?
Draco: (strangles) I. Am. Not. Gay.!
Harry: Ha-ha. Like I’ll believe THAT for a minute! You even seduced Oliver while we were having an affair!
Draco: You had an affair with Oliver Wood? (gasp)
Harry: (blushes) N-no, it was just in the fic.
Draco: (teases) Potter is gay! Potter-is-gay! Potter.Is.Gay.! HARRY POTTER IS GAY! (collapses laughing)
Harry: (sarcastic) If I were gay, then what are you?
Draco: (proud) A sexy beast!
Harry: (guffaws) It’s a lie, a big-big-big lie, you crying priss!
Draco: I am not a crying priss, you idiot!
Harry: Yes you are. I remembered when the author put it in her first H/D fanfic.
Draco: Malfoys do not cry!
Harry: (mock voice) Oh really?
Draco: (pissed) HMM?
Harry: I still know that I was the one who made you cry. BUAHAHAHAHA! (points at Draco) Besides, J.K. made you cry too.
Draco: That was different!
Harry: You cried all the same. (girly voice) Harry, please don’t leave me, I love you! MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!
Draco: Clam up, Potter. Or else I will stick this up your arse. (points to his wand)
Harry: Where? (a/n. the room is still dark)
Draco: (grinning manically) Here! (shoves his wand up Harry’s arse)
Harry: OW! Shit! What was that?!? (rubs butt woefully)
Draco: Told ya.
Harry: Wait till you get this! (pulls out a very huge deathly-looking intsrument)
Stop that.
Draco: Who’s that?
Harry: The one who made you cry. (stifled laughter)
Draco: (pounces at Harry) I’ll get you, you git!
Harry: (grabs wand and points it at Draco’s chin) You hurt me and you’ll regret it for the rest of your life.
Draco: (huffs)
Harry: Besides, (looks at reader O__O) the readers still have to ask us a question. Though I don’t want to be asked, argh. It’s all the author’s damn fault.
Draco: Please ask us a question! (pleads)
Harry: See? She’s even manipulating your brain.
Draco: Meh.
Harry: Reader, this author will not leave us in peace unless you make her happy by asking us a question! She’s desperate like that, because she and we know that this story or interview could not continue unless you do ask something!
Draco: So very desperate. (sigh)
Harry: (hears something) Oh my. Someone’s calling us again.
Draco: Can’t we spend an entire day without anything to do?
Harry: Seems like that.
Draco: OH WELL. (glares at you T.T reader) You better think of something to ask us or else… (raises wand)
Harry: Yes, I’ll have to agree with him this time.
Draco: Let’s go. (grabs Harry and walks away)
*****
Author: iP
Pairing: Harry/Draco
Genre: Crack. *cough*
Rating: Um. Let’s just think of it as a PG-13 one. Hah.
Flame?: NO.
Disclaimer: J.K. owns the characters. Sigh.
Summary: And so the interview continues…
A.N.: I advise you to read the part 1 before this. Kies? :D
part 1
*****
Harry: (stares blankly into space) Um…hello…we’re back!
Draco: What the hell?
Harry: (looks around blindly) Why is everything so dark?
Draco: Meh. I guess this is one of the things the author did.
Harry: AUTHOR!
Draco: (hits Harry on the back) Stop it.
Harry: At least I’m doing something.
Draco: (winks) Well, we could do other things, y’know…
Good day, my lads. This is your author. Actually, the male version. Counterpart. Yeah. ‘Tis me.
Harry: (rolls eyes) And so?
Ahem. I am regretful to say that nobody asked you any questions…
Draco: (eyebrows meet) WHAT?!?
Harry: No one?
Draco: Does that mean-
Yes, Draco. You two suck. Suckers!
Harry: Hey! No fair!
Draco: (looks at you O_O reader) Why did you not ask us a question? We’d answer it! Don’t tell me you don’t believe us? Malfoys have one word!
Harry: (shakes head) Malfoy, I’m afraid the Harry Potter phenomenon had actually… went down a bit. Popularity loss.
Draco: (shakes Harry) WHAT POPULARITY LOSS??
Harry: What? I just think the people’s affection for Harry Potter decreased.
Draco: OF COURSE THEY DECREASED! Because Draco Malfoy appreciation inflation rate increased to a hundred percent! MUAHAHAHA!
Harry: Shut up.
Draco: (looks at you reader again O.O) Reader! Tell me, who do you like more? That four-eyed git or the smooth, sexy, suave me, Draco Malfoy the great?
Harry: (butts in) Of course they’ll choose me.
Draco: How could you prove that? I’ve got a much much nicer body than yours, and besides-
Harry: You still shag me.
Draco: (sputters) NOT. TRUE.!
Harry: (rolls eyes) Just because it was sadomasochism and you get to dominate me, you ABUSED it!
Draco: (red in the face) Did NOT!
Harry: Yes you did. The shag scene was supposed to last only for two minutes but instead it became three! I was bound and you were shoving it all the way IN!
Draco: NOT!
Harry (whistles) I always had a feeling that you fancied me, Malfoy. Must I tell you that I don’t like gays?
Draco: (strangles) I. Am. Not. Gay.!
Harry: Ha-ha. Like I’ll believe THAT for a minute! You even seduced Oliver while we were having an affair!
Draco: You had an affair with Oliver Wood? (gasp)
Harry: (blushes) N-no, it was just in the fic.
Draco: (teases) Potter is gay! Potter-is-gay! Potter.Is.Gay.! HARRY POTTER IS GAY! (collapses laughing)
Harry: (sarcastic) If I were gay, then what are you?
Draco: (proud) A sexy beast!
Harry: (guffaws) It’s a lie, a big-big-big lie, you crying priss!
Draco: I am not a crying priss, you idiot!
Harry: Yes you are. I remembered when the author put it in her first H/D fanfic.
Draco: Malfoys do not cry!
Harry: (mock voice) Oh really?
Draco: (pissed) HMM?
Harry: I still know that I was the one who made you cry. BUAHAHAHAHA! (points at Draco) Besides, J.K. made you cry too.
Draco: That was different!
Harry: You cried all the same. (girly voice) Harry, please don’t leave me, I love you! MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!
Draco: Clam up, Potter. Or else I will stick this up your arse. (points to his wand)
Harry: Where? (a/n. the room is still dark)
Draco: (grinning manically) Here! (shoves his wand up Harry’s arse)
Harry: OW! Shit! What was that?!? (rubs butt woefully)
Draco: Told ya.
Harry: Wait till you get this! (pulls out a very huge deathly-looking intsrument)
Stop that.
Draco: Who’s that?
Harry: The one who made you cry. (stifled laughter)
Draco: (pounces at Harry) I’ll get you, you git!
Harry: (grabs wand and points it at Draco’s chin) You hurt me and you’ll regret it for the rest of your life.
Draco: (huffs)
Harry: Besides, (looks at reader O__O) the readers still have to ask us a question. Though I don’t want to be asked, argh. It’s all the author’s damn fault.
Draco: Please ask us a question! (pleads)
Harry: See? She’s even manipulating your brain.
Draco: Meh.
Harry: Reader, this author will not leave us in peace unless you make her happy by asking us a question! She’s desperate like that, because she and we know that this story or interview could not continue unless you do ask something!
Draco: So very desperate. (sigh)
Harry: (hears something) Oh my. Someone’s calling us again.
Draco: Can’t we spend an entire day without anything to do?
Harry: Seems like that.
Draco: OH WELL. (glares at you T.T reader) You better think of something to ask us or else… (raises wand)
Harry: Yes, I’ll have to agree with him this time.
Draco: Let’s go. (grabs Harry and walks away)
*****