Title: Thursday's Child
Author:
lyrasCharacters: Remus, Petunia
Length: 2,700 words
Feedback: Constructive feedback would be much appreciated, as I had problems with this story and I'm still not happy with parts of it.
Notes: For
saeva's
Gen Ficathon. Written for
churri_arashi, who requested: "Remus quietly travels to Little Whinging to catch a glimpse of young Harry." I really hope you like this!
Thanks very much to
luzdeestrellas and
maple_clef for super speedy beta-reading!
Privet Drive was awash with mud. The cars that occasionally ploughed down the road - carrying harassed fathers, neat mothers and excited children to and from town - looked as if they were forcing their way through the sheets of rain, windscreen wipers languidly pushing the water aside.
In an alleyway, Remus shivered and watched them go.
He'd been observing the Dursleys for several days now, returning home only to sleep, and he knew their simple routine. At twenty past eight, the husband drove off to work, beeping at anyone who interrupted his progress by driving below the speed limit. About that time, the curtains would open inside the house. If Remus wandered past, as he had done on several occasions over the past few days, he would glimpse Petunia making her rounds, her blonde hair encased in a headscarf as she dusted the rows of Christmas cards lining the living room walls.
At about eleven o'clock, Petunia would emerge from the house, pushing a huge, navy blue pram. In the pram, his chattering and wailing muffled by a translucent plastic cover, was a toddler whom Remus assumed to be Dudley Dursley, since he certainly wasn't Harry.
Petunia and the child returned at about midday, generally with grocery bags crammed into the shelf above the wheels. Petunia wheeled her son back into the house, and there they stayed until about three thirty, when they once more made the trip along the street. This time they returned sooner, perhaps by four o'clock. Then again nothing, until the husband reappeared at twenty to six, headlights forging aggressively through the darkness.
One evening they had had friends round. As the sound of laughter and pleasantries spilled from the front door, Remus had pulled up the collar of his coat and shoved his hat down, as he'd seen detectives do in the films he'd loved as a child, when a life in the wizarding world had appeared as merely a tantalising dream, and retired to the rear of the alley until the street was quiet again.
Not once did he see any indication of a fourth presence in the house.
The rain intensified to sleet, and Remus pressed himself into the wall, wishing that the use of magic in this area wouldn't set off all sorts of alarms in the Ministry of Magic.
Water trickled down the back of his neck as he watched Petunia, shrouded in mackintosh and a plastic scarf, edge the large pram down the front step and along the street, hunched against the rain. Once she was out of sight, he counted to fifty and then stepped onto the pavement of Privet Drive. Despite his vigil of several days, he still had no clear idea of what he was going to do. He concentrated on attempting to look purposeful as he approached the house, and marched confidently up to the front door. Unbelievably, it was ajar. Remus looked around hurriedly, expecting to see Petunia bearing down on him. There was no sign of her, however, so he pushed through the doorway and into the house. He couldn't pass up this opportunity; he would simply have to take the risk that Petunia might return.
A distant wail startled him; he followed it up the stairs and into a small bedroom, where a thin little boy with black hair and a runny nose was clasping the bars of a cot.
"Harry!" Remus scooped him up and cuddled him tightly until the sobs subsided, which took approximately twenty seconds. He looked down.
"Hi, kiddie! What have you been up to, eh? Why are you shut away in here?"
Harry said nothing, but merely stared unflinchingly at him in the way that only very young children can. Discomfited, Remus prompted, "Do you remember me? I'm Uncle Remus! I used to play with you, along with Uncle Peter and-" He stopped.
Harry nodded solemnly, but remained silent, and Remus wasn't sure whether he'd been recognised or not. How long was a child's memory at the age of one and a half? Still, Harry seemed to be comforted by his presence. Emboldened, Remus suggested that they find some food, to which Harry assented with a decided nod. Carrying Harry, and wondering whether it was natural that he should feel more or less the same weight as he had been three months ago, Remus walked gingerly down the stairs and into the kitchen, where he swiftly located the fridge.
"Let's see, what have we got here? Cake! Ah…Christmas cake, we'd better not eat that. Here, try this." He extracted the remains of a Victoria sponge, located a knife and cut Harry a generous slice, before hunting around for a tissue to wipe Harry's nose.
"What are you doing?"
Remus jumped around. Petunia stood in the doorway, a dripping scarf dangling from her hands, which were halfway to her face. Harry sidled behind him. Remus swore inwardly.
"I'm sorry-" he began, and then registered Harry's reaction. "I'm looking after Harry," he remarked, "which it doesn't look as if you've been doing much of recently. Does he ever see the outside of this house? Are you trying to pretend he's not here?"
"You're one of them!" Petunia's voice was full of revulsion, and she looked wildly around the kitchen, searching, Remus assumed, for some kind of weapon.
"If by that you mean I'm a wizard, then yes, I am," he said calmly. "I also happen to have been a great friend of James and Lily's, and-"
He was interrupted by a gasp from Petunia. "You're him! The one who betrayed them! Harry, get away from there!" She looked around wildly and then made a dive for Harry, who burst into tears as she thrust him behind her with one hand while scrabbling on the draining board with the other. She turned around brandishing a large knife, and Remus backed away.
"Get out." Petunia waved the knife in Remus's face, forcing him to move further towards the doorway. "Get out!"
Remus put up his hands reflexively as he edged away from the weapon. "That's not me you're thinking of," he protested, struggling to keep his eyes on Petunia instead of the knife. "It was Sirius; I'm Remus - we've met before, actually. Sirius was our friend but he betrayed them, and he's in prison now. It was Sirius who was the traitor!" His voice cracked; it was the first time he'd said that aloud, and once again he was overwhelmed because how could Sirius, who had always been full of wildness and laughter, have turned out to be a calculating double agent?
Petunia made another movement with the knife; Remus stepped backwards and banged his elbow on the doorframe.
"I'm sorry," he said, rubbing his arm. "I didn't mean to frighten you; I'll go now, but I just wanted to see Harry and make sure he was all right." He backed into the hallway, and Petunia followed him, pulling the door to against Harry who had been edging around her.
He risked a quick glance behind him to establish the location of the front door, which was now closed. Petunia didn't look as if she'd actually use that knife unless he moved to attack her, but he didn't exactly want to turn his back on her. "Please," he said, "please won't you take good care of Harry? For Lily's sake, if nothing else." His questing fingers found the door latch; Petunia stepped back to allow him to open the door, but still held the knife on him, her arm shaking ever so slightly.
"My sister is dead," she said, "and her bloody wizard husband, and your sort tried to kill her son, too, and you will not get me or my son like that." Her voice was shrill as she finished speaking, and as if in answer, a wail arose behind her. Over her shoulder, Remus noticed that the pram was parked in a shadowy corner at the other end of the hall.
Petunia half-turned, her face softening instantly. "Coming, sweetums!" she called gently. "Mummy's coming." As the child's crying amplified to "Mummeee!", she looked back at Remus. "Get out. If you mean us no harm, then get out and leave us alone."
"I'm sorry," apologised Remus again as he backed over the threshold. He glimpsed Harry's face peeping out from the kitchen and called, "Bye, Harry!" Petunia's face became a mask of fury in the instant before she slammed the door in his face. Still damp, Remus was instantly drenched by the rain which pelted into him as he trudged down the driveway, almost as if it was trying to force him back towards the house.
He remained in the alley around the corner because he had nothing better to do, and because it was cheaper than paying for endless cups of tea in the greasy spoon down towards the main street.
He'd given notice on the flat he'd shared with Sirius, and his tenancy expired tomorrow. He'd somehow scraped together enough cash to pay the final month's rent, both his share and Sirius's, but it had left him with almost nothing. He didn't really care; he simply needed to escape from the looks people gave him: either suspicious, because he'd been close friends with Sirius as well as James, or pitying, because he'd lost three good friends in one catastrophe.
He'd been too proud to accept help from his parents outright, but when his mother had suggested that he visit some of her Muggle relatives for a time, he'd seized upon the plan. The only problem was that these relatives lived in Australia. At least, it wasn't a problem as such - Remus would be glad to be anonymous for a while on the other side of the globe, in a world where - with the exception of his relatives - they didn't even believe in werewolves. But he'd wanted to catch a glimpse of Harry before he left, to say his goodbyes.
Dumbledore had been evasive when Remus had visited him, but had admitted that Harry had been left with his aunt and uncle. Although he'd also disclosed their location, he had tried to dissuade Remus from visiting them. "Harry is safe there," he'd said. "It would be best if you left him alone, to get on with his new life."
"Perhaps that's so," Remus had replied. "But I feel I have a responsibility. I know I'm not his godfather, but…" He'd lapsed into silence at this reminder of Sirius, and Dumbledore had put on his understanding face and said no more.
He'd not really intended to speak to Harry, but once he'd waited around for a day or two without seeing a sign of him, he'd begun to worry. He was almost certain that the boy must be safe, otherwise the Ministry of Magic couldn't possibly have kept it quiet - but it seemed very odd that the Dursleys didn't appear to take him out anywhere.
With only one day left before his lease ran out, he'd resolved that today he had to do something; he owed it to the memories of Lily and James to make sure that their son was all right before he left the country.
And now he'd scared Petunia and completely ruined his attempt at seeing Harry, who was probably confused and frightened by what had occurred. Remus fumed to himself, wandering up and down the alley as he considered his next move.
Finally the rain began to ease off. Remus had just decided to return to the house, confront Petunia and demand that she promise to look after Harry properly when a movement caught his eye. He looked up to find Petunia, securely wrapped up again, parking the pram at the spot where the alley joined Privet Drive. He walked towards her slowly, not wanting to frighten her again. When he was still several metres away, she put her hand out as if to ward him off, and so he halted.
"I - I do remember you," she said. "From Lily's wedding."
"Yes," agreed Remus, and then stopped, unsure of how to proceed. "Look-" he began, but Petunia interrupted him.
"Tell me what happened. To Lily. And - and him."
"What do you know so far?" he asked.
She hunched her shoulders. "I know they were betrayed, and killed by that awful man, and that then he disappeared. That's all."
And so he told her. How Lily and James had known for some time that they were Voldemort's targets. How James's body was found in the hallway of their home, Lily's in the back garden, with a distressed Harry close by. How they would have felt no pain, only terror. He told her about Peter, how he'd been so heartbroken at the news that he'd rushed blindly to his own death. He told her about Sirius, who was Harry's godfather and who had betrayed him, deceiving them all in the process. He told her how he'd known nothing of all this until he'd seen the newspaper when it was over, because they'd thought he was the spy, not Sirius. And finally, he told her how he was going to Australia, and had wanted to see Harry one last time before he left.
Petunia listened with stony features. When Remus finished his tale, he paused, but she didn't appear to have anything to say, and so he launched into the subject that was uppermost in his mind.
"Professor Dumbledore - he was in charge of the operations against Voldemort until two months ago - Professor Dumbledore told me that living with you confers some kind of protection on Harry."
Petunia looked up at this. "He told me that, too," she said bitterly, "but what kind of protection does it give me or my son? Or Vernon? He's brought danger on us all, danger from your stupid world." She turned away slightly, and Remus could see her blinking tears away. "We were so happy! Vernon's company was really starting to get somewhere, and we had Dudley, and then this happened."
Remus stared at her, wondering what on earth he could say to convince her. "Petunia," he began, "if Harry hadn't somehow - nobody knows how, you know - thwarted Voldemort, he would be dead, and so would a lot of others, people in your world. Voldemort and his followers - they wanted to bring about a magical Britain, with non-magical people being nothing but subjects, followers, if they weren't killed outright. And he was terrifyingly close to achieving this. Didn't Lily ever tell you?"
Pain flickered across Petunia's face before being smoothed away. "Before Lily - died, I hadn't heard from her for six months. She - she did mention something about it, but…" She faltered, and looked down at her wrist. "I have to get home. We're having Vernon's parents over for Christmas Dinner tomorrow, and I have to get everything ready. I just wanted -" She looked at him for a long moment, then sighed and turned the pram around. Inside, gazing through the plastic and looking cramped but otherwise happy, was Harry. Beside him, Dudley shoved and struggled to usurp his space, but Harry appeared not to notice, so interested was he in the gloomy surroundings of the alleyway.
Remus swallowed. "Bye Harry," he said loudly, unsure whether his voice would be heard inside the pram. He raised his hand in a wave and, after a long stare, Harry lifted his arm in a child's approximation of the gesture. Remus looked back at Petunia, unable to speak.
"I don't usually leave him alone, you know," she said jerkily. "There's a lady who lives round the corner, I usually drop him off there, but she's away for Christmas week, and I thought he'd be safe in the cot. I didn't-" She shook her head in a helpless gesture, and then busied herself in reversing the pram around a large puddle and out onto Privet Drive. "Goodbye."
"Goodbye," replied Remus. As Petunia rounded the corner, he hurried to the edge of the road and called, "Thank you! Please take care of Harry!"
But there was no reply, and Remus watched her as she walked stiffly back towards the house, pushing the pram slightly slower than usual because of its heavy load. Halfway down the street, she paused for a moment and put a hand to her face, before continuing on her journey.
It was drizzling again as he took one last look at the receding pram, before pulling his coat tight around himself and setting off in the other direction.