Five Things to Throw Into the Fire
Title: Five Things to Throw Into the Fire
Word Count: 3088
Rating: PG
Pairing: Junhyung/Hyunseung
Summary: Just done on a prompt...Again xDD
Disclaimer: I do not own the characters.
A/N: Anyway. Again back with JunSeung. It's really weird...I don't even write about my main fandom but here I am writing JunSeung. Anyway, constructive criticism appreciated <3 (And I hate that I can't copy from Word WITH italic text)
Winter was passing but Hyunseung still felt as depressed as in the period of darkness.
The grass was going green slowly but the man still only saw the puddles left from the snow.
The sun was shining brighter but the lonely figure still only saw the shadow of the winter.
There he was, sitting in front of the fireplace with a carton box in his hands. Leaned against the couch, his look expressed melancholy as he looked at the box which seemed to have had better days as now the corners were slowly disappearing, leaving small holes to replace them. The color once had been white, but now you could only see how grey it was from all the dust. It looked like no one had touched it in months, which was probably true.
Hyunseung slowly opened the lid, placing it beside him without ruining his dark jeans. The inside was still how it had been when he had closed the box - only five things in it.
Hyunseung’s gaze stopped at one of the things and he hesitantly raised his hand but still finally decided to go on as he brought the item a bit closer to his eyes.
It was a ring - a couple ring.
It was nothing special to a stranger but Hyunseung knew the meaning behind it. He turned it between his fingers until he saw something that caught his eye - a graving.
Hyunseung remembers his first reaction when he received it - he couldn’t have been happier as he was bouncing the whole week while the other was always just calm and laughed at the other. It had been pure bliss.
Junhyung had just appeared on some day, randomly, with a sly smirk on his face. This made the older a bit confused but Junhyung kept at it without spilling anything.
Another thing was that he had been a bit too affectionate that day, which was totally uncommon as Junhyung was always the one to keep his calm and could appear even a bit…cold.
This time it had been different - already while entering Junhyung had pulled Hyunseung into his arms and gave him a long hug, slightly swinging from side to side.
“How you’ve been,” he whispered into the other’s ear, feeling how Hyunseung tensed at the breath against his neck. He then let go but still held his hand as they made it to the living room.
Hyunseung let go of his hand to get some drinks and a bit to eat, thinking the other was hungry.
It seemed his thoughts were true as the younger said thanks and took a bite with a smile on his face. Hyunseung looked over at him while he was eating. He still remembers that feeling - peacefulness mixed with affection. That’s when their relationship had been at the best. That year. He could never forget it.
He was shaken out of his thoughts as a strawberry was pushed against his lips and he opened his mouth on a reflex. It was sweet as he noted the sugar-coat around it.
His eyes met with another set of brown orbs and they both smiled.
“You’re quite…different. Did something happen?” Hyunseung asked after Junhyung had suddenly hugged him from back.
“Hmm,” Junhyung murmured at the back of his throat before placing his head a bit more comfortably on the other’s shoulder. “I just feel like it.”
“That’s a bit weird,” the older chuckled but the other kept quiet.
“Hey,” Junhyung asked again as Hyunseung was finishing the last of the dishes, “You think it’d be possible for us to stay like this?”
The older felt a tint of sadness from his voice as he turned around, “What’s wrong?” Hyunseung arched an eyebrow as he cupped the other’s cheeks with his hands.
“I told you, it’s nothing. I’m just in a weird mood today and I just started wondering,” the other shrugged it off, went to the living room and sat down on the couch again, Hyunseung still managing something in the kitchen side.
“By the way, I got you a present,” Junhyung smiled as he knew the other’s reaction would be good.
And he was right as Hyunseung suddenly was only a meter away from him, eyes big as a puppy’s as he seated down on the floor. “What? Where? For me?” He spazzed looking around to detect anything strange.
“Hmm,” Junhyung let his hand go through the other’s hair, playing with it. “Yeah, for you. It’s nothing special and I don’t know if you’re going to like that but - “
He was stopped by feeling lips against his for a slight contact before meeting with Hyunseung’s eyes again. “You always start rambling.” Junhyung gave out a hesitant smile before taking out a box from his jacket.
“Here,” he said and handed it to Hyunseung whose eyes widened at every inch it made closer to his hands.
“Is this…what I think it is?” He looked back up to see Junhyung looking away, slight blush on his face. “But…I thought you said you didn’t like stuff like this,” he said while holding the box preciously in his hands as if it was going to break.
The other was still silent.
Hyunseung didn’t press further as he gradually opened the box to reveal what he had expected to see. It was still as shiny as in the dusty carton box at the present.
Hyunseung took it out and studied it until seeing a graving inside. He looked closer, trying to make out the words and his mouth fell open slightly with every letter.
I love you…
Hyunseung looked back at the other who had practically hidden his face from embarrassment.
“Junhyung,” the older said softly, knowing very well the fact that being sweet must’ve felt weird for the younger.
There was no reply so Hyunseung shifted closer to his legs and placed his chin on his thigh, “Junhyung,” he said again, ever so softly but the other stayed unresponsive, still looking into the opposite direction.
Hyunseung let his heart take over as he reached to the other’s collar, forcing their eyes to meet and pulling him close enough to place another kiss on the younger’s lips.
“I love you too,” Hyunseung whispered against Junhyung’s lips.
Hyunseung let out a sigh as he placed it back into the carton box. That was the time they had been the happiest before the problems arose.
Before the hell.
He remembers all the times he had wanted to throw it into the fire…If it only had burned…
His eyes then stop at the next thing - a picture of them in university, arms loosely hanging around other’s shoulders as they both were laughing. It had been taken two and a half years before the ring incident.
Was it two months after they both had met for the first time?
It had been their first year in university and they both had mostly the same courses. Their first meeting was a bit awkward but it was fun remembering it later.
Junhyung had been walking, his nose in the book, trying to remember facts fast before the exam. But one thing he should’ve known was not to hold a coffee cup at the same time as he suddenly crashed into a back, making coffee spill all over the other’s white shirt.
Junhyung gasped in surprise as the other yelped. “I’m so sorry,” Junhyung said over and over again, reaching for a napkin and trying to help the other clean up a bit.
“Watch where you’re going,” the other said, surprisingly not in a mean way.
“Argh, why white!” He exclaimed before walking off to the nearest restroom. Junhyung followed on instinct, still apologizing.
“I got it, you may stop now. It’s not like we can make it disappear,” Hyunseung replied calmly before taking his shirt off, leaving him only in a sleeveless top.
The older chuckled as he noticed the other’s eyes going over his body and he looked at him, seeing how the other almost unnoticeably jumped in his place before answering with his gaze.
His eyes. Hyunseung remembers the first time he had looked into his eyes. The feeling how he couldn’t look away. And as he found out later, it had been the same for Junhyung also. Were they just mesmerized? Or was it some kind of spark?
Junhyung was the first to escape it as he did a fake cough before saying: “I have a clean shirt though. I was going to keep it for after practice time but I guess this would save the trouble.”
Hyunseung seemed in thought for some seconds before nodding, accepting his offer and the younger took the shirt out of his bag. It wasn’t Hyunseung’s style but he dealt with it. It was better than nothing.
“Thanks,” he said before accepting it.
“I’m really sorry,” he said once more, making the other give out a laugh, “I told you it’s enough.”
There was a silence. A silence when Hyunseung thought which action to take.
“My name is Hyunseung,” he finally said and reached out his hand. It seemed to surprise Junhyung a bit but he reacted fast as he accepted, “Junhyung.”
That was their first meeting.
This brings us to the third item - hair-pin which he had on while chilling at Junhyung’s house one night. To get hair out of his face of course.
Hyunseung gives out a dry laugh, “Oh it was so embarrassing. Who could’ve thought he could make me act like that.”
Hyunseung had often stayed over at Junhyung’s as he lived alone and well, they always had a lot of fun. It was one of those nights.
Hyunseung remembers Junhyung’s wide eyes when he had asked him to sit down and have a small serious chat. He had confessed.
“You’re serious?” The younger said, the other only nodding in reply, looking back into the brown eyes full of confusion.
“But…We’re best friends,” Junhyung continued.
“I know that,” Hyunseung sighed before continuing, “But I can’t help it I guess. Though just say it if you don’t want to or anything, I just wanted to…I don’t know…Give it a chance and hope that maybe…just maybe you could accept me as a bit more than a best friend.”
Junhyung leaned on the table with his elbow and let his head rest on his arm while messing with his hair in nervousness.
“I really don’t know what to say. But…You know I like someone at the moment, right?” Junhyung asked cautiously, eyeing the other from the corner of his eye, seeing how the other’s eyes hit the table.
“I know,” a voice came out, almost gone unheard by the younger.
But after 10 seconds Hyunseung stood up, surprising the other as he walked over and patted on his back, “Ah, just give it a rest, it’s nothing! I guess I was just wondering how you felt about me,” Hyunseung gave out a fake smile. Even though he was usually really good at making those look realistic, he couldn’t manage one in this situation.
Something had pierced through his heart. And that something was a fact that Junhyung was into someone else…And that someone was a girl. Junhyung was bi, he knew that, but how could he win against a girl.
“Are you alright?” Junhyung’s voice seemed worried and Hyunseung just made a gesture with his hand as if brushing it off. “Don’t worry.”
They both went to bed early.
A week later Hyunseung found out that Junhyung was finally dating the girl and he couldn’t help but feel even more crestfallen. The feeling had been horrible - how it was eating you from inside and nothing could cheer you up. Even the best friend who was able to was gone. And that made him feel even worse.
That was his alone period. It lasted long and was hard but he survived.
Not that he had any other choice.
The two boys became distant but after their break-up Junhyung came back to Hyunseung and even though the older was slightly angry at him, he accepted by wrapping his arms around the younger and trying to relieve the pain from the other’s broken heart.
The fourth item in that carton box brought a smile on his face - a mini-notebook.
Junhyung had dated quite some number of girls after the one that broke his heart into millions of pieces. None of the relationships lasted long so Hyunseung didn’t worry that much and as Junhyung still spent as much time with him as before, the older had no reason to complain.
You could even say he even got used to it.
Except for the part where he had to listen to his relationship problems. There were times where the girl cheated on him, or times when he slipped and made out with another girl causing hell of an argument. Times when he just got bored and played with girls and times when he just told them off.
Junhyung had changed slightly. He seemed to have closed his heart to others. Hyunseung could feel it in his case too but only slightly. And it seemed Hyunseung was the only one who was the closest to him.
Things between them turned a bit strange though - Junhyung seemed lately rather touchy-feely. Was it just because he was comfortable? He had been like that before Hyunseung’s confession also or…No…Hyunseung didn’t even want to get his hopes up.
He was just happy.
Happy that he could have at least that much of his attention.
And he didn’t mind that much, it was nice to cuddle with someone from time to time, just lie down on the coach and meddle with other’s hair.
Especially Hyunseung liked the times Junhyung was drunk after another breakup. It was then when Junhyung would come to his place and just crash there. The older didn’t know why but the Junhyung then started randomly flirting with him.
“Hyunseung, come here,” he would say and Hyunseung would usually comply.
Junhyung then would grab at the hem of his shirt and just lean against his chest, nose in the crook of his neck. “I like how your heart starts beating faster for me.”
Good thing was that Junhyung never remembered what happened at times like these.
It was nothing much though as Hyunseung didn’t want to take advantage of him…Or die after Junhyung finds his back hurting like hell the next morning.
So he just played along, sometimes giving out shallow breaths against the other’s ear, sometimes laying butterfly kisses along the other’s neck and sometimes…they just made out roughly, Hyunseung pinning the younger up against the wall.
The other didn’t refuse though.
This went on about 2 months.
At one time they were again sitting in a lecturing room, Hyunseung slightly glancing outside as the weather started clearing up.
Suddenly he felt a tap on his shoulder and he looked back to Junhyung who handed him a small notebook, about 10 pages. And as he had nothing better to do, he glanced through it, his eyes widening with every page.
Hey Hyunseung. He turned a page, a bit confused.
You know I have been thinking lately.
I guess it had been decided from the moment I spilled the coffee on you. Hyunseung’s lips formed into a smile.
It’s really interesting how my thoughts always end up about you. Hyunseung started to get the point of this notebook as he turned another page fast.
You were there for me after the worst breakup of my life…
…after the problems with my family…
…after me being such an ass to you…
…even after when I practically abandoned you…
You always let me come back.
Never judging me.
Staying in the background.
And the last page made his stomach erupt in butterflies as his breath got hiked.
I guess you’re the best for me after all.
Hyunseung turned back to Junhyung so fast his eyes got a bit blurry for some seconds before seeing the other smile at him and putting a finger on his lips before shushing.
Hyunseung smiled at the memory before putting the notebook back into its place and finally landing his eyes on the last item - a letter. Or could you say the letter?
Already a month before the letter problems started to pile up. And arguments which were pointless started to appear. They were both suffering.
Why?
I guess it was just time taking its turn.
A breaking point. Every relationship has it.
They missed each other when they were apart but as they saw each other, they started fighting. It was horrible.
And Junhyung was the one to end it.
Junhyung had stayed over at one night and he was being surprisingly affectionate. But this time it wasn’t pleasant as Hyunseung felt something horrible coming.
And he was right.
In the morning Junhyung was gone, only a letter left on the table which Hyunseung already dreaded then. He still opened it, recognizing the handwriting even though the letter seemed to have been written in hurry.
Hyunseung
You probably know what I’m going to say, don’t you? You know it as well as me that this isn’t going anywhere, we need time apart and the sooner the better - before we both end up in even worse state. I can’t bear to see you suffering.
I’m taking the responsibility though as you have endured a lot because of me. That’s why I’m the one writing this letter…so you wouldn’t have to even though our thoughts are the same.
I still love you but this is inevitable.
I don’t even know what else to say, except…
I’m sorry.
Junhyung
Hyunseung’s lips started quivering as his eyes stung; tears started forming in the corners of his eyes. He felt his face-muscles clench and he did nothing to stop the tears as they started pouring down on his cheeks. He wasn’t angry; he knew this was going to happen sooner or later.
He was just disappointed.
Disappointed that he couldn’t do anything.
They had been so happy.
Why this?
Present Hyunseung’s thoughts were interrupted by a knock on the door.
“Are you ready?” A voice came from outside and Hyunseung hurriedly closed the lid, pushing the carton box below the couch. He whiped a single tear from the corner of his eyes before standing up and exiting the room without a single look back.
No matter what we have gone through…We have still made it in the end.
Word Count: 3088
Rating: PG
Pairing: Junhyung/Hyunseung
Summary: Just done on a prompt...Again xDD
Disclaimer: I do not own the characters.
A/N: Anyway. Again back with JunSeung. It's really weird...I don't even write about my main fandom but here I am writing JunSeung. Anyway, constructive criticism appreciated <3 (And I hate that I can't copy from Word WITH italic text)
Winter was passing but Hyunseung still felt as depressed as in the period of darkness.
The grass was going green slowly but the man still only saw the puddles left from the snow.
The sun was shining brighter but the lonely figure still only saw the shadow of the winter.
There he was, sitting in front of the fireplace with a carton box in his hands. Leaned against the couch, his look expressed melancholy as he looked at the box which seemed to have had better days as now the corners were slowly disappearing, leaving small holes to replace them. The color once had been white, but now you could only see how grey it was from all the dust. It looked like no one had touched it in months, which was probably true.
Hyunseung slowly opened the lid, placing it beside him without ruining his dark jeans. The inside was still how it had been when he had closed the box - only five things in it.
Hyunseung’s gaze stopped at one of the things and he hesitantly raised his hand but still finally decided to go on as he brought the item a bit closer to his eyes.
It was a ring - a couple ring.
It was nothing special to a stranger but Hyunseung knew the meaning behind it. He turned it between his fingers until he saw something that caught his eye - a graving.
Hyunseung remembers his first reaction when he received it - he couldn’t have been happier as he was bouncing the whole week while the other was always just calm and laughed at the other. It had been pure bliss.
Junhyung had just appeared on some day, randomly, with a sly smirk on his face. This made the older a bit confused but Junhyung kept at it without spilling anything.
Another thing was that he had been a bit too affectionate that day, which was totally uncommon as Junhyung was always the one to keep his calm and could appear even a bit…cold.
This time it had been different - already while entering Junhyung had pulled Hyunseung into his arms and gave him a long hug, slightly swinging from side to side.
“How you’ve been,” he whispered into the other’s ear, feeling how Hyunseung tensed at the breath against his neck. He then let go but still held his hand as they made it to the living room.
Hyunseung let go of his hand to get some drinks and a bit to eat, thinking the other was hungry.
It seemed his thoughts were true as the younger said thanks and took a bite with a smile on his face. Hyunseung looked over at him while he was eating. He still remembers that feeling - peacefulness mixed with affection. That’s when their relationship had been at the best. That year. He could never forget it.
He was shaken out of his thoughts as a strawberry was pushed against his lips and he opened his mouth on a reflex. It was sweet as he noted the sugar-coat around it.
His eyes met with another set of brown orbs and they both smiled.
“You’re quite…different. Did something happen?” Hyunseung asked after Junhyung had suddenly hugged him from back.
“Hmm,” Junhyung murmured at the back of his throat before placing his head a bit more comfortably on the other’s shoulder. “I just feel like it.”
“That’s a bit weird,” the older chuckled but the other kept quiet.
“Hey,” Junhyung asked again as Hyunseung was finishing the last of the dishes, “You think it’d be possible for us to stay like this?”
The older felt a tint of sadness from his voice as he turned around, “What’s wrong?” Hyunseung arched an eyebrow as he cupped the other’s cheeks with his hands.
“I told you, it’s nothing. I’m just in a weird mood today and I just started wondering,” the other shrugged it off, went to the living room and sat down on the couch again, Hyunseung still managing something in the kitchen side.
“By the way, I got you a present,” Junhyung smiled as he knew the other’s reaction would be good.
And he was right as Hyunseung suddenly was only a meter away from him, eyes big as a puppy’s as he seated down on the floor. “What? Where? For me?” He spazzed looking around to detect anything strange.
“Hmm,” Junhyung let his hand go through the other’s hair, playing with it. “Yeah, for you. It’s nothing special and I don’t know if you’re going to like that but - “
He was stopped by feeling lips against his for a slight contact before meeting with Hyunseung’s eyes again. “You always start rambling.” Junhyung gave out a hesitant smile before taking out a box from his jacket.
“Here,” he said and handed it to Hyunseung whose eyes widened at every inch it made closer to his hands.
“Is this…what I think it is?” He looked back up to see Junhyung looking away, slight blush on his face. “But…I thought you said you didn’t like stuff like this,” he said while holding the box preciously in his hands as if it was going to break.
The other was still silent.
Hyunseung didn’t press further as he gradually opened the box to reveal what he had expected to see. It was still as shiny as in the dusty carton box at the present.
Hyunseung took it out and studied it until seeing a graving inside. He looked closer, trying to make out the words and his mouth fell open slightly with every letter.
I love you…
Hyunseung looked back at the other who had practically hidden his face from embarrassment.
“Junhyung,” the older said softly, knowing very well the fact that being sweet must’ve felt weird for the younger.
There was no reply so Hyunseung shifted closer to his legs and placed his chin on his thigh, “Junhyung,” he said again, ever so softly but the other stayed unresponsive, still looking into the opposite direction.
Hyunseung let his heart take over as he reached to the other’s collar, forcing their eyes to meet and pulling him close enough to place another kiss on the younger’s lips.
“I love you too,” Hyunseung whispered against Junhyung’s lips.
Hyunseung let out a sigh as he placed it back into the carton box. That was the time they had been the happiest before the problems arose.
Before the hell.
He remembers all the times he had wanted to throw it into the fire…If it only had burned…
His eyes then stop at the next thing - a picture of them in university, arms loosely hanging around other’s shoulders as they both were laughing. It had been taken two and a half years before the ring incident.
Was it two months after they both had met for the first time?
It had been their first year in university and they both had mostly the same courses. Their first meeting was a bit awkward but it was fun remembering it later.
Junhyung had been walking, his nose in the book, trying to remember facts fast before the exam. But one thing he should’ve known was not to hold a coffee cup at the same time as he suddenly crashed into a back, making coffee spill all over the other’s white shirt.
Junhyung gasped in surprise as the other yelped. “I’m so sorry,” Junhyung said over and over again, reaching for a napkin and trying to help the other clean up a bit.
“Watch where you’re going,” the other said, surprisingly not in a mean way.
“Argh, why white!” He exclaimed before walking off to the nearest restroom. Junhyung followed on instinct, still apologizing.
“I got it, you may stop now. It’s not like we can make it disappear,” Hyunseung replied calmly before taking his shirt off, leaving him only in a sleeveless top.
The older chuckled as he noticed the other’s eyes going over his body and he looked at him, seeing how the other almost unnoticeably jumped in his place before answering with his gaze.
His eyes. Hyunseung remembers the first time he had looked into his eyes. The feeling how he couldn’t look away. And as he found out later, it had been the same for Junhyung also. Were they just mesmerized? Or was it some kind of spark?
Junhyung was the first to escape it as he did a fake cough before saying: “I have a clean shirt though. I was going to keep it for after practice time but I guess this would save the trouble.”
Hyunseung seemed in thought for some seconds before nodding, accepting his offer and the younger took the shirt out of his bag. It wasn’t Hyunseung’s style but he dealt with it. It was better than nothing.
“Thanks,” he said before accepting it.
“I’m really sorry,” he said once more, making the other give out a laugh, “I told you it’s enough.”
There was a silence. A silence when Hyunseung thought which action to take.
“My name is Hyunseung,” he finally said and reached out his hand. It seemed to surprise Junhyung a bit but he reacted fast as he accepted, “Junhyung.”
That was their first meeting.
This brings us to the third item - hair-pin which he had on while chilling at Junhyung’s house one night. To get hair out of his face of course.
Hyunseung gives out a dry laugh, “Oh it was so embarrassing. Who could’ve thought he could make me act like that.”
Hyunseung had often stayed over at Junhyung’s as he lived alone and well, they always had a lot of fun. It was one of those nights.
Hyunseung remembers Junhyung’s wide eyes when he had asked him to sit down and have a small serious chat. He had confessed.
“You’re serious?” The younger said, the other only nodding in reply, looking back into the brown eyes full of confusion.
“But…We’re best friends,” Junhyung continued.
“I know that,” Hyunseung sighed before continuing, “But I can’t help it I guess. Though just say it if you don’t want to or anything, I just wanted to…I don’t know…Give it a chance and hope that maybe…just maybe you could accept me as a bit more than a best friend.”
Junhyung leaned on the table with his elbow and let his head rest on his arm while messing with his hair in nervousness.
“I really don’t know what to say. But…You know I like someone at the moment, right?” Junhyung asked cautiously, eyeing the other from the corner of his eye, seeing how the other’s eyes hit the table.
“I know,” a voice came out, almost gone unheard by the younger.
But after 10 seconds Hyunseung stood up, surprising the other as he walked over and patted on his back, “Ah, just give it a rest, it’s nothing! I guess I was just wondering how you felt about me,” Hyunseung gave out a fake smile. Even though he was usually really good at making those look realistic, he couldn’t manage one in this situation.
Something had pierced through his heart. And that something was a fact that Junhyung was into someone else…And that someone was a girl. Junhyung was bi, he knew that, but how could he win against a girl.
“Are you alright?” Junhyung’s voice seemed worried and Hyunseung just made a gesture with his hand as if brushing it off. “Don’t worry.”
They both went to bed early.
A week later Hyunseung found out that Junhyung was finally dating the girl and he couldn’t help but feel even more crestfallen. The feeling had been horrible - how it was eating you from inside and nothing could cheer you up. Even the best friend who was able to was gone. And that made him feel even worse.
That was his alone period. It lasted long and was hard but he survived.
Not that he had any other choice.
The two boys became distant but after their break-up Junhyung came back to Hyunseung and even though the older was slightly angry at him, he accepted by wrapping his arms around the younger and trying to relieve the pain from the other’s broken heart.
The fourth item in that carton box brought a smile on his face - a mini-notebook.
Junhyung had dated quite some number of girls after the one that broke his heart into millions of pieces. None of the relationships lasted long so Hyunseung didn’t worry that much and as Junhyung still spent as much time with him as before, the older had no reason to complain.
You could even say he even got used to it.
Except for the part where he had to listen to his relationship problems. There were times where the girl cheated on him, or times when he slipped and made out with another girl causing hell of an argument. Times when he just got bored and played with girls and times when he just told them off.
Junhyung had changed slightly. He seemed to have closed his heart to others. Hyunseung could feel it in his case too but only slightly. And it seemed Hyunseung was the only one who was the closest to him.
Things between them turned a bit strange though - Junhyung seemed lately rather touchy-feely. Was it just because he was comfortable? He had been like that before Hyunseung’s confession also or…No…Hyunseung didn’t even want to get his hopes up.
He was just happy.
Happy that he could have at least that much of his attention.
And he didn’t mind that much, it was nice to cuddle with someone from time to time, just lie down on the coach and meddle with other’s hair.
Especially Hyunseung liked the times Junhyung was drunk after another breakup. It was then when Junhyung would come to his place and just crash there. The older didn’t know why but the Junhyung then started randomly flirting with him.
“Hyunseung, come here,” he would say and Hyunseung would usually comply.
Junhyung then would grab at the hem of his shirt and just lean against his chest, nose in the crook of his neck. “I like how your heart starts beating faster for me.”
Good thing was that Junhyung never remembered what happened at times like these.
It was nothing much though as Hyunseung didn’t want to take advantage of him…Or die after Junhyung finds his back hurting like hell the next morning.
So he just played along, sometimes giving out shallow breaths against the other’s ear, sometimes laying butterfly kisses along the other’s neck and sometimes…they just made out roughly, Hyunseung pinning the younger up against the wall.
The other didn’t refuse though.
This went on about 2 months.
At one time they were again sitting in a lecturing room, Hyunseung slightly glancing outside as the weather started clearing up.
Suddenly he felt a tap on his shoulder and he looked back to Junhyung who handed him a small notebook, about 10 pages. And as he had nothing better to do, he glanced through it, his eyes widening with every page.
Hey Hyunseung. He turned a page, a bit confused.
You know I have been thinking lately.
I guess it had been decided from the moment I spilled the coffee on you. Hyunseung’s lips formed into a smile.
It’s really interesting how my thoughts always end up about you. Hyunseung started to get the point of this notebook as he turned another page fast.
You were there for me after the worst breakup of my life…
…after the problems with my family…
…after me being such an ass to you…
…even after when I practically abandoned you…
You always let me come back.
Never judging me.
Staying in the background.
And the last page made his stomach erupt in butterflies as his breath got hiked.
I guess you’re the best for me after all.
Hyunseung turned back to Junhyung so fast his eyes got a bit blurry for some seconds before seeing the other smile at him and putting a finger on his lips before shushing.
Hyunseung smiled at the memory before putting the notebook back into its place and finally landing his eyes on the last item - a letter. Or could you say the letter?
Already a month before the letter problems started to pile up. And arguments which were pointless started to appear. They were both suffering.
Why?
I guess it was just time taking its turn.
A breaking point. Every relationship has it.
They missed each other when they were apart but as they saw each other, they started fighting. It was horrible.
And Junhyung was the one to end it.
Junhyung had stayed over at one night and he was being surprisingly affectionate. But this time it wasn’t pleasant as Hyunseung felt something horrible coming.
And he was right.
In the morning Junhyung was gone, only a letter left on the table which Hyunseung already dreaded then. He still opened it, recognizing the handwriting even though the letter seemed to have been written in hurry.
Hyunseung
You probably know what I’m going to say, don’t you? You know it as well as me that this isn’t going anywhere, we need time apart and the sooner the better - before we both end up in even worse state. I can’t bear to see you suffering.
I’m taking the responsibility though as you have endured a lot because of me. That’s why I’m the one writing this letter…so you wouldn’t have to even though our thoughts are the same.
I still love you but this is inevitable.
I don’t even know what else to say, except…
I’m sorry.
Junhyung
Hyunseung’s lips started quivering as his eyes stung; tears started forming in the corners of his eyes. He felt his face-muscles clench and he did nothing to stop the tears as they started pouring down on his cheeks. He wasn’t angry; he knew this was going to happen sooner or later.
He was just disappointed.
Disappointed that he couldn’t do anything.
They had been so happy.
Why this?
Present Hyunseung’s thoughts were interrupted by a knock on the door.
“Are you ready?” A voice came from outside and Hyunseung hurriedly closed the lid, pushing the carton box below the couch. He whiped a single tear from the corner of his eyes before standing up and exiting the room without a single look back.
No matter what we have gone through…We have still made it in the end.