Which of today's foto posts is the most depressing? This one?

[ludickid]

As you can see from these recent photographs, my hair has gotten very, very long and fat. An interesting development, however, is that I also appear to be going bald. Or something. I mean, I still have ridiculously huge amounts of hair, but not as much ridiculously much morer as once I had did. All I know is that hair is coming off of my head

Comments

[manningkrull]

When did we hang out? About three years ago? For whatever it's worth, I think you look younger and skinnier in these pics than my memory of how you looked then. But my memory of how you looked then might be also colored by the last three years of your self-deprecating old/fat/etc LJ posts. But you look great!

[ludickid]

When did we hang out? About three years ago?

Wait, am I the only one who celebrates the anniversary?

[manningkrull]

I go to that little Italian place on South Street, alone, and talk to you like you were there, like that scene in the Sixth Sense.

[petit_chou]

I...I'm pretty sure Manning just called you "black."

therapy

[beanparty]

Leo-

About your therapist. Of the brief time that I had with my therapist, whom I actually liked, but fired anyway, she did tell me this. Of all the different types of therapy, the only factor in determining the success of failure of it was having a good relationship with your therapist. Now, of course, I'm not really sure what "good relationship" means, but it doesn't sound like you are going down a road that could lead to one. Which doesn't mean that you're doomed, just that you may need to find someone else.

Having just come back to the US for a few weeks, I can say that I have forgotten about all the drug commercials on TV, and how it feels like Americans think that there is drug for every and any aliment. When in reality I bet there isn't. But maybe that is just the negative, critical, pessimistic brit side coming out. It does tend to rub off. I don't want to take a pill to make me different though.

Sorry to ramble but its like my second day at a new job and I'm bored. Just felt I should pipe up.

Re: therapy

[ludickid]

Hey, it's good to hear from you, Shan! Welcome back to the US.

It really does help to hear that -- part of the problem is that, having never had therapy and not being entirely comfortable with the whole idea of it, I really don't know what to expect. I'm not even sure what I want out of it, which is in itself symptomatic of...something.

That "hair" photo is totally MySpace.

[petit_chou]

Man, I don't know about your hair of the state of your mental health, but I DO know that you either need to exorcize your house of all the spirit orbs or CLEAN YOUR DAMN MIRROR.

PS - Manning's right -- you're looking good these days.

MySpace is all about hair photos, really

[ludickid]

Hey, thanks! Perhaps you two are blinded to my flaws by how dirty the mirrors are in the house. (Those are actually two different mirrors, both filthy.)

Another thing I could do is learn to turn off the flash on my camera.

your new LJ therapist Pico doesn't want to work on his spreadsheets

[picodulce]

1. i am a bit anti-mental health drugs except in extreme cases. but, from experience, and my siblings' current experience, the pot-smoking is not the good way to go when depressed. when in a healthy state of mind, the reefer is best but will still cause some emotional dips (partly why i don't smoke anymore-- it just don't work for keeping me on an even, not-near-tears keel). i can't comment on the therapy. just wanted to put in my "when depressed, lay off the cess."

2. let's talk about the hair. the hair looks good. what is the rate of hair loss? do you pick up large clumps in the shower drain? if not, let it roll. if you were 20 and shedding that would be a big cause of concern. keep th hair as is. looks good. you'd pick up chicks in the Motor City Bar (in the Lower East Side). DO NOT GO (intentionally) BALD. and if you go shave it off, for the love of God do not wear leather.

Psycho Therapy

[ludickid]

1. Weed has never had a depressive effect on me, although I will admit to being sad that I don't smoke weed anymore. Which in itself probably means I need therapy.

2. My hair is not coming out in clumps, just like little ones-and-twos when I brush it or run my hands through it, which is new. Speaking of wearing leather, this conversation between the two of us about therapy and hair care clearly means we are gay.

Re: Psycho Therapy

[picodulce]

1. Remember, you control the weed. The weed does not control you.

2. Your hair will be fine. I know because I date a hairdresser and he's fabulous. But at least I don't wear leather when I shave my head.

[goingferal]

I have to say, first, that this post contains my favorite ever typo.

Secondly, I like your longer hair.

Thirdly, it made me cry when my mental health professional suggested I try a drug to alter my moods, but after 10 years, I must say that the drug *does good things* for me--it's not a sense of being happier, but a matter of being functional versus disfunctional in the small and large ways. (I mean, stuff like paying bills vs not paying bills, picking trash up off the floor, washing the dishes, etc.)

Fourthly, if you don't like talking to/want to talk with your MHP, then ... well, the whole process breaks down. So, switch now.

Fifthly, I need new a few new icons, I think.

[goingferal]

Addendum:

I shed in the fall. You'd think I'm going bald, but no, I just plain lose hair. I suppose other people could be thusly affected, too.

[ludickid]

1. I just noticed that. I will leave it in for your sake.

2. Thank you.

3. Eh, I dunno. The thing is, I'm not that depressed -- I'm not nonfunctional, I only occasionally feel like utter shit, and I think the problems I have are not going to be addressed by drugs. But, again, this very resistance, many would argue, is evidence of need. I dunno.

4. Right, I'm sayin'. Although, you know, is the conception of 'therapist' as 'friend' a bad one? Should I be thinking 'therapist' as 'person who tells me what I need to hear'? Maybe I should just save my money to blow on candy.

5. Everyone should have a hundred icons.

[goingferal]

4. I don't think of my therapist as a friend, but I do think of her as someone I can talk to "safely" and get feedback that makes me think further or helps me sort something out. So, there's a point somewhere between friend and person you resent where you should be able to interact and be told things you don't want to hear and still be willing to come back the next week.

3. ... That makes sense. I'd go with your gut on this. On the other hand, I've heard the argument that going on anti-depressants can make you more able to sort out what is going on and more able to deal with and handle issues while you're in the middle of a tough spot--and taking something for 6 months doesn't mean you'll need to or want to take it for the rest of your life.

5. I'm gonna get right on it.