2012 Year End Assessment
I've made it an online journal tradition to write an assessment for the end of each year. What I've learned, where I've been, how I've gained or lost...
Last decade's assessment of 2000 -2009 with a nice summation of things over the course of my writing this journal:
http://lucretiasheart.livejournal.com/2010/12/29/
Recently, things have been back on an uptrend. 2010's year-end assessment:
http://lucretiasheart.livejournal.com/2010/12/30/
2011 continued that easily:
http://lucretiasheart.livejournal.com/2012/01/02/
2012 was just as good, though my focus changed slightly. Since we've moved to White Gables, I've entered a new era of my life. One of more independence, security, self-assurance, peace, and stability. Though drama has been coming around me in spades, I have managed to ride the waves of it unruffled for the most part, maintaining my compassion and patience.
Jobs & Career
For Gerick, his new position (which he obtained in August 2011) has meant that we've been okay financially with even a little extra for the first time since the year 2000, which is when he lost the last truly decently-paying job he's ever had. We've had medical and dental benefits which allowed us to address some issues at long last as well. Meanwhile, though the company where he works-- "Celestial"-- has begun laying people off, his own position would be one of the last to go, and at least we would see it coming. After this spring, layoffs should be over for a while and we'll be able to breathe easier. Even in a worst-case scenario, he's assured of 2 years of unemployment plus money for college "retraining."
My own very modest online career involves proofing transcripts for the United States Congress. A company out of Ohio where I used to live does it, and because I've had face-to-face contact with the owners of the company and have helped them with transcripts off and on since 2004 or so-- when I decided to stop doing proofing last year (didn't need to, eye strain) they asked if I could simply spend a couple of hours a week coordinating work sent out to various online transcribers. I agreed, and now I make almost the same amount for far less hours-- I absolutely HAVE to be reliable, but unless electric goes off, that's not an issue. Other than that, my time is nearly free-- especially during the winter when I have little to do as a manager on White Gables property.
And being property managers is our "other" job-- Gerick and myself. I do paperwork, handle keys, take deliveries when people aren't home, and do light work like sweeping, raking, painting and cleaning. Gerick blows leaves, does repairs, heavy cleaning (like the gutters every year), mows lawns, and plants trees and does other various improvements. Between us, the place has turned around quite a bit, and we liked it to begin with when we first got here! We've also gone out of our way to really be picky about renters, and the results have been that we have a friendly bunch of very respectful and trustworthy people as tenants and our closest neighbors. We really enjoy managing, and because the guy who oversees foundational properties for the university is also a man who owns many rental properties, we've already been told that if we move from here, he'd be interested in having us oversee one of his other properties-- which is very flattering! Although in general, I'm not looking to go back to typical apartment living ever again if I can help it.
Prepping & Decline
Last year was our very first LARGE garden, with a companion planting design-- that, despite the late and cold spring, did very well! Beyond jams and salsa, we also took up pickling this year (which is trickier.) I got much more practiced and nuanced in my approach with organic seedling starts and learned a lot about pest-control without using poisons. We've also investigated and experimented with several ideas, including pressure-canning and dehydrating foods to preserve them. We'll be getting affordable access to what we need to use these techniques in 2013.
We've stayed on a budget and our savings "saved" us when the car engine went belly up last autumn and we had to buy another one (used, of course!). Now we're on a stricter budget for a while until we have some modest savings built up again. This year we also began weatherizing the entire building with caulking and strips, thus hitting yet another Greer suggestion for not just ourselves, but our tenants. Gerick also improved his nutritional regimen and some of his chronic issues have been alleviated substantially.
Though in some ways what we've accomplished so far may seem modest, I feel quite proud that we've been continuing to pursue steady changes and incorporate them permanently into our lifestyle as a whole.
Social & Lifestyle
Some changes for sure.
One was going out of my way to get to know and socialize with my neighbors here at White Gables, including lots of chats and even going on outings or having them over for wine & cheese. Everyone participated in a sort of holiday gift exchange as well, which was really rather cool! Things are very comfortable here, and I can tell that now that the ice has been broken, it seems people are actually wanting to socialize more. We're not the only ones who have never really had this sort of closeness with apartment neighbors before-- so everyone seems equally pleased and yet unsure as to how we're supposed to go about this. With just a little initiating and nudging here and there, though-- things seem to be falling into place naturally and well.
On the other hand, I've stopped going out of my way to socialize with my former work friends from the Arts N' Crafts job I held for almost 3 years. Other than facebook contact, most of them have faded from my life gracefully, but for a few of my 'Adventure Club' girls. Those relationships have matured but we don't see each other as much as we'd like to lately.
I think a big part of why I didn't expand my social life in the last year was my commitment to help my friend Robin get through the worse of her ab-reactions after leaving Monster Mark. Its calmed down quite a bit in the last couple of months, but for over a year, I was on the phone with her for hours almost daily. She had no other supportive contacts and I couldn't abandon her during that period of crisis. Things are still very rough, and she's had a couple of serious setbacks (like the suicide attempts) while beginning to process all that pain and rage. However, very slowly some members of her family are 'getting it' and she's getting therapy more regularly.
But all that energy directed at Robin created a deep need in me to avoid people in order to rest and recover my own spirits. Dealing with deep darkness is draining. It was worth it, no question-- but I just didn't have enough juice remaining at the end of the day to expand my social world.
I had one blindside attack from an enemy I haven't seen in 18 years and THAT was surprising, but I got over my upset very quickly. I've realized that making and dealing with enemies is a part of life that anyone who rocks boats by insisting on truth will have to expect as part of the price for practicing what they preach. I have to be okay with this reality, because I'm never going to live in an ideal world where people refuse to be so petty and pathetic.
Lifestyle-wise, I have spent most of my free time secluded in order to maintain and preserve my inner sense of peace and well-being. I kept busy with the garden, and the property, and writing and research and played some video games and read some books and called it good. Other than Faerieworlds, there were no seriously big plans last year and overall I was okay with that.
Emotional & Spiritual
For the last few years, most of the paranormal weirdness that indicates possible abduction activity has been taking place from late January through early March. This year, I hope to be prepared to meet it rather than denying it's reality while its happening in front of me. If I can keep my head, I may be able to trick some more memory from these events, which is always my ongoing goal.
My early onset menopause reversed itself early last year, and when it did my emotional stability returned from the previous unexplained anger stage I was in for a few months. If that mood swing comes back again when my hormones shift, I'll be better able to handle it. Meanwhile, other than that odd bit, I've been remarkably balanced and mellow. Despite some serious stress and drama (from others' lives) I've kept my composure and met things as they've come quite well. Feeling emotionally drained on occasion and in need of time to myself to re-charge makes sense to me, and I haven't been too hard on myself over it.
Some astral and ghost activity, generally very subtle and relatively rare, has occurred this year-- but my dream life has settled WAY down. 2011 was a year of oddly violent dreams that were very directly related to deeply personal shifts in my psyche. 2012, in contrast, has been mostly the 'long story' variety of dream with surprisingly little in the way growth oriented themes. At night, I mostly relax and enjoy the show that my subconscious comes up with these days!
The overall theme for the past 3 years has been simply focusing on and cultivating peace and stability. I knew I wanted to venture out into being more actively spiritual again someday, but I just never felt ready. Rather than push myself, I tried to honor those inner cues that insisted upon more time to heal and rest-- and grow only very slowly. Apparently that approach has worked well because I feel confident that I've developed and strengthened my overall resilience and maturity.
I think I've known that 2012 would be the last year I'd be in "down-scope" mode, though. I could feel-- under the surface lurking-- a need to expand myself and my world again, even though that means making myself vulnerable and taking chances. I hope this next time I venture out, those years of living more modestly will reward me.
Last decade's assessment of 2000 -2009 with a nice summation of things over the course of my writing this journal:
http://lucretiasheart.livejournal.com/2010/12/29/
Recently, things have been back on an uptrend. 2010's year-end assessment:
http://lucretiasheart.livejournal.com/2010/12/30/
2011 continued that easily:
http://lucretiasheart.livejournal.com/2012/01/02/
2012 was just as good, though my focus changed slightly. Since we've moved to White Gables, I've entered a new era of my life. One of more independence, security, self-assurance, peace, and stability. Though drama has been coming around me in spades, I have managed to ride the waves of it unruffled for the most part, maintaining my compassion and patience.
Jobs & Career
For Gerick, his new position (which he obtained in August 2011) has meant that we've been okay financially with even a little extra for the first time since the year 2000, which is when he lost the last truly decently-paying job he's ever had. We've had medical and dental benefits which allowed us to address some issues at long last as well. Meanwhile, though the company where he works-- "Celestial"-- has begun laying people off, his own position would be one of the last to go, and at least we would see it coming. After this spring, layoffs should be over for a while and we'll be able to breathe easier. Even in a worst-case scenario, he's assured of 2 years of unemployment plus money for college "retraining."
My own very modest online career involves proofing transcripts for the United States Congress. A company out of Ohio where I used to live does it, and because I've had face-to-face contact with the owners of the company and have helped them with transcripts off and on since 2004 or so-- when I decided to stop doing proofing last year (didn't need to, eye strain) they asked if I could simply spend a couple of hours a week coordinating work sent out to various online transcribers. I agreed, and now I make almost the same amount for far less hours-- I absolutely HAVE to be reliable, but unless electric goes off, that's not an issue. Other than that, my time is nearly free-- especially during the winter when I have little to do as a manager on White Gables property.
And being property managers is our "other" job-- Gerick and myself. I do paperwork, handle keys, take deliveries when people aren't home, and do light work like sweeping, raking, painting and cleaning. Gerick blows leaves, does repairs, heavy cleaning (like the gutters every year), mows lawns, and plants trees and does other various improvements. Between us, the place has turned around quite a bit, and we liked it to begin with when we first got here! We've also gone out of our way to really be picky about renters, and the results have been that we have a friendly bunch of very respectful and trustworthy people as tenants and our closest neighbors. We really enjoy managing, and because the guy who oversees foundational properties for the university is also a man who owns many rental properties, we've already been told that if we move from here, he'd be interested in having us oversee one of his other properties-- which is very flattering! Although in general, I'm not looking to go back to typical apartment living ever again if I can help it.
Prepping & Decline
Last year was our very first LARGE garden, with a companion planting design-- that, despite the late and cold spring, did very well! Beyond jams and salsa, we also took up pickling this year (which is trickier.) I got much more practiced and nuanced in my approach with organic seedling starts and learned a lot about pest-control without using poisons. We've also investigated and experimented with several ideas, including pressure-canning and dehydrating foods to preserve them. We'll be getting affordable access to what we need to use these techniques in 2013.
We've stayed on a budget and our savings "saved" us when the car engine went belly up last autumn and we had to buy another one (used, of course!). Now we're on a stricter budget for a while until we have some modest savings built up again. This year we also began weatherizing the entire building with caulking and strips, thus hitting yet another Greer suggestion for not just ourselves, but our tenants. Gerick also improved his nutritional regimen and some of his chronic issues have been alleviated substantially.
Though in some ways what we've accomplished so far may seem modest, I feel quite proud that we've been continuing to pursue steady changes and incorporate them permanently into our lifestyle as a whole.
Social & Lifestyle
Some changes for sure.
One was going out of my way to get to know and socialize with my neighbors here at White Gables, including lots of chats and even going on outings or having them over for wine & cheese. Everyone participated in a sort of holiday gift exchange as well, which was really rather cool! Things are very comfortable here, and I can tell that now that the ice has been broken, it seems people are actually wanting to socialize more. We're not the only ones who have never really had this sort of closeness with apartment neighbors before-- so everyone seems equally pleased and yet unsure as to how we're supposed to go about this. With just a little initiating and nudging here and there, though-- things seem to be falling into place naturally and well.
On the other hand, I've stopped going out of my way to socialize with my former work friends from the Arts N' Crafts job I held for almost 3 years. Other than facebook contact, most of them have faded from my life gracefully, but for a few of my 'Adventure Club' girls. Those relationships have matured but we don't see each other as much as we'd like to lately.
I think a big part of why I didn't expand my social life in the last year was my commitment to help my friend Robin get through the worse of her ab-reactions after leaving Monster Mark. Its calmed down quite a bit in the last couple of months, but for over a year, I was on the phone with her for hours almost daily. She had no other supportive contacts and I couldn't abandon her during that period of crisis. Things are still very rough, and she's had a couple of serious setbacks (like the suicide attempts) while beginning to process all that pain and rage. However, very slowly some members of her family are 'getting it' and she's getting therapy more regularly.
But all that energy directed at Robin created a deep need in me to avoid people in order to rest and recover my own spirits. Dealing with deep darkness is draining. It was worth it, no question-- but I just didn't have enough juice remaining at the end of the day to expand my social world.
I had one blindside attack from an enemy I haven't seen in 18 years and THAT was surprising, but I got over my upset very quickly. I've realized that making and dealing with enemies is a part of life that anyone who rocks boats by insisting on truth will have to expect as part of the price for practicing what they preach. I have to be okay with this reality, because I'm never going to live in an ideal world where people refuse to be so petty and pathetic.
Lifestyle-wise, I have spent most of my free time secluded in order to maintain and preserve my inner sense of peace and well-being. I kept busy with the garden, and the property, and writing and research and played some video games and read some books and called it good. Other than Faerieworlds, there were no seriously big plans last year and overall I was okay with that.
Emotional & Spiritual
For the last few years, most of the paranormal weirdness that indicates possible abduction activity has been taking place from late January through early March. This year, I hope to be prepared to meet it rather than denying it's reality while its happening in front of me. If I can keep my head, I may be able to trick some more memory from these events, which is always my ongoing goal.
My early onset menopause reversed itself early last year, and when it did my emotional stability returned from the previous unexplained anger stage I was in for a few months. If that mood swing comes back again when my hormones shift, I'll be better able to handle it. Meanwhile, other than that odd bit, I've been remarkably balanced and mellow. Despite some serious stress and drama (from others' lives) I've kept my composure and met things as they've come quite well. Feeling emotionally drained on occasion and in need of time to myself to re-charge makes sense to me, and I haven't been too hard on myself over it.
Some astral and ghost activity, generally very subtle and relatively rare, has occurred this year-- but my dream life has settled WAY down. 2011 was a year of oddly violent dreams that were very directly related to deeply personal shifts in my psyche. 2012, in contrast, has been mostly the 'long story' variety of dream with surprisingly little in the way growth oriented themes. At night, I mostly relax and enjoy the show that my subconscious comes up with these days!
The overall theme for the past 3 years has been simply focusing on and cultivating peace and stability. I knew I wanted to venture out into being more actively spiritual again someday, but I just never felt ready. Rather than push myself, I tried to honor those inner cues that insisted upon more time to heal and rest-- and grow only very slowly. Apparently that approach has worked well because I feel confident that I've developed and strengthened my overall resilience and maturity.
I think I've known that 2012 would be the last year I'd be in "down-scope" mode, though. I could feel-- under the surface lurking-- a need to expand myself and my world again, even though that means making myself vulnerable and taking chances. I hope this next time I venture out, those years of living more modestly will reward me.