TW: Underhanded Tactics, Chapter I [T]
Fandom:
Torchwood
Title:
Underhanded Tactics
Chapter I:
The Plot
In which Tosh recruits Jack and Ianto for a special mission.
Author:
lt_indigo
Pairing(s):
Jack/Ianto
Warning(s):
none at this stage
Disclamer:
Not RTD. I love the boys too much.
Word count:
506 + footnotes
Author's note:
This is a bit of a weird one. It's written in a kind of Pratchett-esque style, with footnotes (all you should have to do is hover over the number, if I've done this right). This is also, at present, unfinished, but I have a plan. I know what I'm doing (for a change). I decided to post to give myself a kick in the pants.
Timeline is Season Two, just before Meat. Hope you like.
on to Chapter II
“Um, can I ask you two something?”
Jack and Ianto looked up from trying to locate Jack’s desk under the paperwork. That the desk was a useful surface for sex was secondary; the foremost concern in Ianto’s mind was that He Could No Longer See The Desk For Paperwork, and therefore the paperwork Would Be Done 1 .
Jack, relieved for the distraction, waved her in 2. Curiously, she closed the door. Everyone in Torchwood knew what a closed door meant. In theory, anyway: Gwen seemed to forget regularly 3.
“Tosh, what’s wrong?”
Ianto was on his feet like a shot at the unusual door-closing, his arm around Tosh, guiding her to the sofa, sitting beside her and fussing. She grabbed his hand with a naughty grin.
“How do you feel about a little deception?”
The two men exchanged puzzled looks.
“You both know how I feel about Owen,” she said.
“He’s not good enough for you, Tosh,” Ianto said with a sigh. It was the topic of many an evening spent in the pub 4.
“He just needs to realise what he’s missing out on,” Jack disagreed, coming to sit on the other side of Tosh. “Tell us what you’re thinking.”
“Would you take me out on a couple of dates? I mean, I’d pay…”
Jack grinned suddenly. “You want to make him jealous?”
She nodded and Ianto hugged her. “If you’re sure he’s the one you want, it would be our pleasure.”
“And you won’t pay a penny,” Jack agreed, snuggling into them affectionately. “After everything you did for us 5, we can return the favour. And we’re going to enjoy doing it.”
1 Admittedly, its secondary use was what motivated Jack more. That and the threat of enforced celibacy until the paperwork was complete. Ianto had been hesitant about using sex (or lack thereof) as a weapon against Jack after Lisa (from whom, ironically, he had learned the tactic in the first place), but in these instances, Jack didn’t seem to mind that much. Not when he got his reward for good behaviour.
2 Bribery with sex was just, sometimes, not enough for paperwork. Not that Ianto wasn’t hot enough to make it work under normal circumstances, but this was paperwork.
3 Jack had a theory that Gwen got her rocks off catching them in the act, but Ianto was convinced that she just forgot about the closed door rule. Ianto was normally right about these things, but Jack refused to believe she was that stupid.
4 Tosh and Ianto had bonded over something or other at some point. Probably around the time of CyberLisa’s death, Jack wasn’t too sure. But they seemed to go out for drinks together quite a lot these days, and Jack wasn’t invited. He should probably be more upset than he was about that.
5 Which is another story entirely. One that might be written, one day, but the author writes painfully slowly on occasions. Which was okay by Jack - it kept Ianto in a state of perpetual alive-ness that otherwise shouldn’t be possible.
on to Chapter II