Beauty and the Beast | Chapter 16/20 [Part 1]
[ P A R T O N E ]
Beauty and the Beast
Author: love_cassiopeia
Summary: Jung Yunho - a gifted and successful actor. Kim Jaejoong - Yunho's biggest fan. After receiving the task to interview Yunho for his journalism assignment, Jaejoong realizes that his favourite actor just might transform him from a "fan" into something much more.
Rated: PG-13 ~ NC-17
Disclaimer: I don’t own the five members, I’m simply borrowing them.
Warning(s): NC-17 material, language
Genre: Romance/Comedy
Pairing(s): YunJae
Chapter 16: Regrets [Part 1]
[Please leave your comments on part 2 of the chapter. I've disabled the comments on part 1]
16.
Part 1:
Regrets
Sony Film Studios Korea. 1:45 PM Seoul, South Korea
A coward, a knave, a fool… those were the titles I desired to take upon, for they described me faultlessly. And yet, at the very same time, they were the only words which I wanted hurl at the actor, making sure such insults would reach his ears in the loudest volume possible.
I left Changmin’s office as promptly as I could, for I could not take the exasperating tension any longer. As the manager embraced me, a part of me imagined that I was in Yunho’s arms, holding onto him tightly. I lusted for his touch once more, but I absolutely understood that such a thing would not be possible now.
As I reached the main floor of the Sony Film Studios building, my mobile phone rang, bringing the eyes of the many employees towards me. I answered the call immediately, knowing how important phone calls would usually turn out to be.
“Yeoboseyo?” I answered, my voice a bit sombre as it spoke into the receiver. I had just experienced a great deal of tragedy, after all.
“Jaejoong! Thank goodness you picked up! I’ve been trying to reach you for ages!” The familiar voice announced, his tone filled with exhilaration.
“Professor Lee!” Although I had not heard it for a few weeks, I recognized the professor’s voice immediately. “How are you?” I asked politely, sticking to the game of karma.
“Never mind me.” The professor contradicted. “I handed in your article into the Seoul Times newspaper a few days ago, and they informed me that your article would be most apt for the entertainment section of the paper.” He clarified, accelerating my heartbeat. “They would like to publish your article in tomorrow’s paper!”
Article… what article? Oh, the article! I had completely forgotten about the article I had written in Bora Bora on the actor’s daily life and behaviour. After all the commotion which hoarded my life the last few days, I was unable to take such the memory into deep consideration.
“That’s great!” I answered after a momentary pause. “I’m overjoyed that they’ve decided to use my article.” Not overjoyed, just happy, for the grief which lingered throughout me took away most of my potential to be overjoyed.
“I would like to see you, Jaejoong.” The professor requested, his benevolent voice ringing throughout my ears. “You’ve received a large amount of money from the newspaper; I would appreciate it if you could come to the university right now to retrieve it.”
I nodded, having no idea that such a thing was feasible. Scoring a fairytale vacation with Yunho was enough; little did I know I would actually benefit from such an astonishing assignment.
“I’ll be there.” I told the elderly professor, eager to receive the large amount of prize money he mentioned earlier. I hung up the phone call without delay, knowing my moments of misfortune would eventually diminish.
I was Kim Jaejoong. Although I was immutably clumsy and absurd, I did have a flicker of sanity within me. My article was the one which won me the position in the Seoul Times, and I was awfully proud, knowing that I was capable of success. My story-my fairytale-had the potential to continue.
I was not resolute to draw an end to my story… not yet.
I retraced my footsteps, moving away from the ridiculously tall skyscraper. I did not belong here, and therefore I could not achieve a single thing here. I needed to savour my past and realize where I truly fit within society. That was the only way I could achieve success honestly and candidly.
I took the bus to a more quiet division of town. The university campus welcomed me as I got off the bus, bringing deep nostalgia to my body diseased with homesickness. The amicable setting receipted me into its arms, the complete opposite of how the Sony Film Studios building greeted me. I instantly found Dr. Lee’s classroom and entered, knowing that this was the place where I belonged.
And soon, I would have to leave this classroom-forever. I would have to immigrate to Japan to ensure the actor a stable career.
I was cordially welcomed into the classroom by Dr. Lee, the professor which had taught me so much during the last few years. I wore a smile as I approached him, veiling any hints of the ordeal I experienced.
The professor handed me a white envelope without delay, his wise features meeting mine. “You deserve this.” He told me, referring to the money. “You’ve written quite a spectacular article on the actor, Jung Yunho.”
I wasn’t so sure about that. Was the newspaper interested in my writing style, or were they simply fervent to hear any news from the illustrious actor?
“Thank you.” I retrieved the white envelope, wondering what I would be able to do with the large amount of prize money. It was certainly worthless to me now.
The fear and guilt that washed over me was nearly strong enough to undo me. I had no intention to leave Seoul, at least, not for another ten years. I had friends here, family members, and even professors who garnered pride towards me. There was no way for me to escape all this.
And Yunho… I would have no way of coming in contact with him ever again.
Didn’t I want to leave him, though? Didn’t I want to rid myself of all the chaos he brought along? Seeing the uneasy expression painted upon me, the professor abruptly questioned me about my emotions. “Jaejoong… are you feeling all right?” He curiously asked. “You look a bit pale.”
Of course I was pale-I had nearly been through hell during the previous forty-eighty hours. “The truth is…” I trailed off, unable to answer. “I’m leaving for Tokyo tomorrow.” I disclosed, trying to be as affirmative as possible as I spoke the dreadful line. “I’m sorry… but I won’t be able to attend your class for the upcoming six months.”
The professor’s eye lit up with curiosity-or was it anger, I wonder. “Why?” He was disappointed, all right. “Why leave all of a sudden?”
I couldn’t tell him the truth: that I’ve entangled myself into a complete mess; that I’ve associated myself sexually and affectionately with Korea’s most eminent actor. The professor would never dare to look upon me in the same way ever again.
“I’m moving to Tokyo to develop my Japanese.” I lied, hiding away the complete truth. “You do recall that I’ve studied Japanese a few years ago, no? I think I’m ready to leave Seoul to start a new life in Japan.”
The professor’s grimace was clearly incredulous. “But why now, when you’ve received all this success and money?” He questioned, discontented from my horrible news. “You have a paved road ahead of you in Seoul, why leave to Japan now?”
I shook my head, trying to hold my uncontrollable fury back. “It’s the right time.” I disclosed, knowing completely that it was certainly not the right time. “I’ll manage it, Professor Lee.”
“What short notice!” He responded, irritated. “And when are you leaving, tomorrow?”
I nodded, hanging my head.
“Well, you won’t be able to see your article in tomorrow’s paper, now would you?” The professor spoke, directing to the article which meant so much to me but now meant so little.
I shook my head. “No.”
The professor grinned, digging into his drawers for a particular file. He pulled out the blueprint of a newspaper-one which had tomorrow’s date printed upon it-and one with the attractive Jung Yunho’s painted upon the front page of the entertainment section.
The elderly professor handed me the wrinkled newspaper. “This is an exact copy of tomorrow’s paper.” He indicated, a benevolent grin on his lips. “I at least wanted you to have this before you left Seoul.”
I bowed and received the paper, scanning over the actor’s cherished charisma. Beside the black and white picture, an article with my name above it stood, accompanying the actor as if was his partner.
“Thank you, Professor Lee.” I remarked, grateful that yet another gracious character had come to accompany me through my misery.
After I retrieved the paper, I organized my documents, my passports, and my visa so they were completely prepared for tomorrow. I bid a final farewell to the professor, signalling him that I was ready to quit one of the most prestigious and famous universities in all of Korea.
I left the campus in guilt. I was in complete dismay for leaving the familiar professor-knowing he as well as Yunho would never reappear in my life ever again.
I held the wrinkly newspaper in my quivering hands, rereading a few sentences I had previous written. ‘Yunho is a child at heart.’ I wrote, stating the truth. ‘Despite his complicated outer exterior, he has a heart that will make you feel like you’re in unspoiled rapture.’
I laughed at those words, realizing how much the actor had deprived me of rapture. I wanted to change those words to ‘he has a tainted heart that will make you feel as if you’re in hell.’ That way, I would be more truthful in the article that was soon to be published.
Looking at his face in the picture-at that cherished face no one would dare to overlook-I felt my blood boil wildly. Behind those orb-shaped eyes and those rosy velvet lips (ones which I craved from the very beginning), there was certainly nothing there; nothing but a stubborn malicious, cruel beast!
Not being able to take it any longer, I felt the sudden urge to rip the unreleased newspaper, tearing it to shreds so that his picture would have no possibility to haunt me ever again. And so I did, shredding the paper apart until nothing was left of it.
There was no one-no, nothing-that would impel me to return to the actor ever again!
Click here for part 2!
[Please leave your comments on part 2 of the chapter. I've disabled the comments on part 1]
.