[52] Nothing Gold Can Stay

Oct 16, 2011 23:11

Nothing Gold Can Stay
Pairing: Jongyu
Rating: PG-13
Word Count: 2601w
Summary: The town thought Jinki killed his parents. But he couldn’t have. That was the afternoon he met the smiling blond boy.
a/n: Comm anniversary fic! Inspired by Crave You by Flight Facilties and Nothing Gold Can Stay by Robert Frost. Pretentious and probably fail interpretation of the lyrics. I hope tsukipon and ruethereal enjoys?! This went on forever.

Nature's first green is gold
Her hardest hue to hold.
Her early leaf's a flower;
But only so an hour.
Then leaf subsides to leaf.
So Eden sank to grief,
So dawn goes down to day.
Nothing gold can stay.
- Robert Frost

Jinki started the day with a family and ended it in the company of police officers.

They said that in one summer afternoon, his parents mysteriously vanished off the face of the Earth. It was the source of town gossip for months - the Lee's sudden, very peculiar disappearance.

The house was neat and organized - just how the Missus preferred. The car was still parked in the garage - just waiting for the Mister to drive it to work. Inside, the house was stocked with food, and the bills were ready to be paid months in advance, as if waiting for someone to live out those months. It wasn’t as if there were any strange signs, if not for the note, most would have assumed that the Lee’s were merely away for a few days and left their teenage son to fend for himself.

Ordinarily, the note would have been nothing special, but in this case, it was something out of the ordinary. ‘So dawn goes down to day. Nothing gold can stay,’ written fluidly in gold ink. Under, a single golden leaf was affixed. Intricately etched and beautiful beyond measure, it sparkled in sunlight, a key to a secret.

After the first few days, an officer deemed the note insignificant and discarded it in the trash. Jinki quietly dug it back out and kept it; he didn’t understand exactly why, but he felt something stir from within as he carefully thumbed over the thin veins of the leaf.

He found a second leaf by his bedside that evening. As he placed both leaves gingerly in his bedside table drawer, that peculiar feeling again invaded his conscious, it felt as if something was wrong with his existence.

That night he dreamed of golden trees and rooms dripping in gold.

-

Jinki was aware that everyone thought he killed his parents. He has heard the whispers follow him as he leaves his home; a wave of heads turning, drilling holes into the back of his skull, silently wondering when one of their own became the monster in their quiet city. He has seen the mothers and fathers skittishly move out of his path in fear that he would suddenly attack. But he was innocent; he didn’t kill anyone. Jinki knew that as much. He knew because that was the peaceful afternoon he met his friend, the smiling blond boy.

-

His friend. A boy with light blond hair and an infectious smile. Jinki had met him while on the way back from school. While readjusting his green backpack, Jinki had noticed a boy sitting near the base of a tree, as if waiting for someone. His light yellow jacket and blond hair proving a startling contrast against the brown tree bark and green leaves. As they locked gazes, Jinki instinctively knew that he would immediately like the other. Just because.

They easily fell into lighthearted camaraderie; the two boys spent the evening walking to nowhere, side-by-side, their topics changing fluidly from hopes and dreams to the possibility of alternate universes and different dimensions. Jinki argued that the existence of alternate dimensions was something only found in fantasy, while the other stubbornly contested otherwise. In the end, Jinki childishly concluded that he was correct because he was taller and older. The shorter boy frowned in defeat, almost bitterly.

By evening, Jinki and his newfound friend parted ways. As he bid farewell, he saw himself reflected in the other’s eyes, the lamp post shading them a golden honey color. Jinki felt the strange sensation again, as if he belonged somewhere else, as if he met the boy in a different place, in a different time.

“Hey listen. It’s late out and I can’t stay. I hope to catch you around tomorrow?”

“One moment I have you, the next you’re gone,” the other boy laughed, almost sadly. Jinki stared in confusion. “Just kidding. See you tomorrow. Stay golden.” And Jinki watched the boy meld into the darkness.

When Jinki returned home, his parents were missing. All was left was a single note and a golden leaf. One moment they were in his life, and the next they were gone.

-

For a week, inspectors kept a close watch on the boy, monitoring his every move, hoping Jinki would tell them something new, hoping that Jinki would confess. An officer was assigned to keep watch over him, in As the town gossiped, Jinki went about life continuing quietly, face carefully serene and neutral.

“It’s very unnatural,” whispered a woman as she gazed fearfully at Jinki leaving the police station. “His parents just disappeared, why is he so calm?”

“It’s obvious he killed them. I can’t see why the police haven’t had him arrested. He’s a danger to our town,” muttered another, wincing slightly as Jinki passed by with a gentle smile.

Jinki knew what they were talking about, he could tell by the looks in their eyes. He knew they meant no harm, after all, his parents did disappear and he was the only lead, but it didn’t lessen the stings.

That evening, Jinki found more golden leaves. Two, this time nestled by his alarm clock. He put them away in his nightstand drawer.

-

During the passing days, Jinki was the most alone. Although he dearly missed his parents, it was the company of his friend he craved the most. It wasn’t as if he didn’t feel anything for his parent’s disappearance, a dull ache permeated his chest every so often and he was filled with a sense of nostalgia every time he sees a happily laughing family. Yet nothing could compare to Jinki’s need to once again see the sincere wide-eyed boy, and basking in the other’s warmth and energy.

He thought it to be impossible to see the other again, as he was still being observed by police. But it didn’t stop his friend from visiting. Jinki might have gone truly mad if not for the shorter boy; a simple, few innocent stolen moments proving to be the highlights of his day. Jinki didn’t understand how the other found him, but he woke up happy and excited at the prospect of seeing his friend for another day.

Every morning, but only so an hour, they spent time together. When the sun rose in the early dawn, showering Jinki’s room in gold, he would awaken by the soft humming of sweet melodies. And together they spent the hour together, laughing and joking like best of friends. The other boy proved to be quite the writer, one that matched Jinki’s budding interests. And together they composed grand sweeping ballads, rich poetry and talked about the most mundane of mundane. The other boy was Jinki’s anchor. He always knew when Jinki needed him the most and never hesitated to offer his warmth and support.

He knew that the other needed him too. He could see it in the way the other seemingly wilted and dimmed whenever their time was to end or was cut short due to the police investigation. He could see it in the pleased spark that appeared on the other boy’s eyes when Jinki sang along to his songs, and the way his face would crinkle shyly when Jinki praised his poetry. It was beautiful.

After the week of close scrutiny, the police finally decided to stop investigating. Citing unsubstantial evidence and limited resources, the case was seemingly put on an indefinite hold. The town’s attention had moved onto a new scandal. The latest apparently involving Principal Choi’s middle son and a beautiful blond transfer student; quite the scandal, it seemed.

-

One halcyon morning, he awoke from the fading images of a dazzlingly gilded tree and discovered three golden leaves by his pillow. His friend was nowhere to be seen and didn’t appear until the late afternoon, looking lost and seemingly dull in sadness.

Silence occupied the house as the shorter boy quietly sat with Jinki on the couch, fingers idly playing with Jinki’s forest green jacket, sniffling slightly. In his concern, Jinki forgot about the golden leaves and the dazzling tree, his eyes focused only on the sullen blond.

-

To most people, a person’s name was very important; it serves as a failsafe conversation starter, a method of introducing oneself to another. But Jinki never found the need to; it was the last thing on his mind whenever the shorter boy boldly held his hand and sang poetry with all the breath in the world, everything felt right.

He never questioned anything; that is, he didn’t want to think of it. He never wondered how his friend was able to sneak in and out of his house. He never pondered how his friend knew when he needed him the most. He never even asked the other boy for his name - because being with the other boy felt natural. At least, during the times when the boy would stick out his tongue so childishly at Jinki’s lame jokes, or during viewings of Romeo and Juliette, when the other would not stop sniffling sadly into his favorite green pillow.

During those moments, Jinki felt the urge to brush away the other boy’s bangs; he wondered what it would be like to lean in and….

-

Four golden leaves were tucked into Jinki’s green slippers. Jinki didn’t notice until later, until it was too late. When he stepped into his slippers and crumpled the delicate flakes during a midnight trip to the bathroom. He gently gathered the golden fragments and placed them in his drawer.

A heavy feeling settled in his stomach. There was something amiss, he felt as if he was viewing the world through a mirror, backwards, upside down. The next morning, the world was gray. The short blond never appeared and Jinki felt as lifeless and dull as the skies outside.

-

Jinki’s dreams were always fleeting and abstract. Since his parent’s disappearance, he’s been dreaming of golden hues and bright glittering slivers, falling from the sky. He moves around his dream, entering a room dripping in the gold. Inside is a lone golden colored tree, leaves falling endlessly from its branches. The room is his friend, sitting serenely in a silver cage, staring dreamily at the sky.

As Jinki walks closer, his friend looks away from the sky and at him. His gaze is empty and carefully clinical. As he stares at-beyond-through Jinki he poses a single question.

“Surely I can’t fall into a game of chase?”

When he wakes up, Jinki almost always forgets this part.

-

Jinki awoke on a sunny Sunday morning to the sounds of quiet sobs. He turned over to his side to find the nightstand drawer opened and empty. Sitting on the side of bed was the blond, holding his parent’s note. He looked out of place in his green sweater. In his lap were the many golden leaflets that Jinki had found over the past month. It’s been days since he had last seen his friend, and Jinki was suddenly awash in a wave of emotions.

Finally noticing Jinki, the shorter boy held his gaze steady and quietly shredded a golden leaf.

“Nature’s first green is gold,” he tore another leaf. “Her hardest hue to hold.”

Jinki watched as the other boy continued ripping the leaves, reciting a poem, until his bed was covered with golden fragments. In the sunlight, the leaves shined green golden.

“So dawn goes down to day. Nothing gold can stay,” Jinki finished, he watched as brown eyes darken with emotion. That strange tingling sense returned, as if Jinki’s entire existence was a lie.

“I try to reach out, but he’s in his own world… Jinki. Do you remember...? Do you remember me?”

“One moment I have you, the next you’re gone.” quoted Jinki. He smiled as he remembered the other boy’s words from their first encounter. “Well, Jonghyun. I am here, do you still want me?”

Jonghyun smiled tearfully and wrapped his arms around Jinki’s form, burying his face in yellow pajamas.

“Of course.”

-

That evening, the police again knocked on the Lee’s door. One grumbled about missing a variety show, the other complained of the cold. The case was reopened after several townsfolk complained of seeing Jinki around town, talking and laughing to nobody, seemingly thin air. Jinki had their full attention again, now that the Choi scandal had dissolved.

After a few minutes of knocking, the door fell open. It was unlocked. Cautiously the police entered the house; the lights were on, indicating that someone was at home. A sound alerted the officers, upstairs. It came from up the stairs. As they carefully traveled up the stairs, they looked for any suspicious signs, any indication of anything.

To the end of the hallway was a single room with its lights on, it gilded the dark hallways in a golden rectangular light. A faded chuckle echoed from the room.

As the officers crept forward, they held their breaths; hands ready, were prepared for the worse. What they found, however, was nothing from this world. At least, nothing they could have accepted as from within their reality.

It felt as if they walked into a room dripping in gold. The entire room was filled with golden leaves. The walls and floor beautifully adorned in golden flakes. A small florescent lamp sat on the table, filling the room with an almost ethereal glow. As one of the officers looked in amazement, his partner was the first to notice a small piece of paper in the middle of the room. The card itself was rather ordinary, a small piece of scratch paper with a few words untidily scrawled in gold ink. But what was extraordinary was the room it was in. The officer nudged his partner, breaking the others trance.

“Hey. Can you read this? My eyesight is pretty bad, I think might be a clue,” he said, pushing the note in the other’s hands.

“So dawn goes down to day. Nothing gold can stay,” muttered the other officer. “Hey wasn’t there another card in like this? Didn’t I throw that one away?”

“I don’t know. But let’s leave. It's creeping me out,” said his partner. “Wait you threw away evidence?!”

Both men left the room lightly squabbling. Eventually a team was assembled to further investigate just what happened to the boy. However, nobody could find a trace of anything extraordinary. The two officers swore that the otherworldly room of dipped in gold existed, that they had been in the room, and stepped on the leaves. Their only clue was the small note, tucked securely in an officer’s pocket. This time, the man kept the small scrap of paper, sometimes taking it out and wondering if what he saw was part of reality or a glimpse into a dream.

To most everyone, it seemed that all was left was the sparse furnishings in the room and a few pieces of stray notebook paper. The remaining faded green wallpaper looked anything but golden.

Years later, the townsfolk still speak of the Lee family, but only in absent passing. Some say that the son murdered his parents, hid the corpses in the walls of his old room and killed himself right after. Others say that the parents abandoned the son, left him to die alone, trapped as a ghost in the house. A few jokingly speculate that that the room holds a secret, one that leads to an entirely different world, full of the gilded leaflets that the officers saw.

But nobody really believes the last story anyways.

fandom: shinee, ship: jonghyun/onew, rating: pg-13

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