Take Two - Chapter Fifteen - Destiel Fanfiction

[lotrspnfangirl]

Title: Take Two
Authors: islanderbib83 & pdlessard07 (pippin1983 & lotrspnfangirl)
Pairing: Destiel
Rating: R (may change)
Summary: Dean and Castiel get drunkenly married at 19. It's bold, it's rash, it's being young and in love. After Dean walked out, Castiel tried to move and after ten years, he's decided to marry again. The only thing standing in his way is his legal marriage. Dean, however, wants a second chance to prove that he's grown up, he's matured, but his love for Castiel has never changed.
Warnings/Spoilers: Angsty! Totally AU.
Beta(s): Huge thanks and hugs to oldbatj for working with us on this! Jude, you’re fantastic!
A/N: We own nothing! We are taking these characters and playing with them nicely. Our fic was based off of this prompt.. Bibi primarily wrote Dean and Dani primarily wrote Cas. Our eye banners are used to signify scene changes and not POV, even if they coincide. We just think the boys have pretty eyes <3
You can find Chapter One here.
You can find lotrspnfangirl fiction index here.
You can find pippin1983 fiction index here.





"Hey Cas, I'm just going to order a pizza tonight... I'm heading to get Dot from school now."

"Okay," Cas smiled, even though he knew Dean couldn't see it through the phone. "I'm finishing up with my Dad and then I will meet you at the house."

"Sounds good! Oh by the way, Dot has tomorrow off from school for a teacher's workshop or something... I got the day off from Bobby. You interested in going to the zoo or something with us?"

"Yeah, I would love to." They said their goodbyes and Cas hung up, the goofy smile still on his face.

"You sure you want to do this?" Dean threw an amused look at Cas as he pulled the car into the zoo parking lot. In the backseat, Dotty had entertained everyone on the drive over by belting out as many songs pertaining to animals as she could, her voice high pitched and increasingly more excited the closer they had gotten to the zoo.

"What? And miss out on this?" Cas raised his eyebrow and turned to look at Dot, joining in with her singing. "Animal crackers in my soup! Monkeys and rabbits loop de loop!!" He nudged Dean's leg, smiling happily.

Guiding the car smoothly into a nice shaded parking spot, Dean grinned at him and got out of the car to free Dot from her seat.

"Daddy are there going to be lions? And tigers? And monkeys? And horses? And even piggies?" Dean laughed, cutting her off as he lifted her onto his hip.

"I think there will be most of those things," Cas answered for Dean and started walking towards the entrance. "They should have a map that will tell us where everything is."

"Yes, they should. I know they have stroller rentals for carrying our picnic lunch and for the princess if her feet get tired." Dean reached into the car for Dot's backpack.

"Sounds like a plan," Cas smiled and Dot bounced in Dean's arms, her hands clasped before her in excitement.

Dean grabbed his own backpack as well. "We got everything?"

"Yeah," Cas nodded and then smiled at Dotty. "Are you ready?"

"Yes!!!" She gasped. Dean locked the car and started walking towards the entrance.

Cas hesitated for a moment before finding Dean's free hand and taking it in his own. "This okay?" He asked after a moment as they approached the gates.

Dean just grinned and squeezed his hand in response.

Cas bought the tickets, ignoring Dean's protest, and grabbed a map from the wall as they entered the zoo. Dean stopped for a stroller and then deposited his pack with their lunch and Dotty's backpack into it before finding Cas’s hand again. Dorothy was now on the ground and helping Cas to open the map and gaze over all of the animal locations.

"So, where're the lions, my dears?" Dean asked leaning over them, laying his left arm over Castiel's shoulder. Dot showed him the lions’ location on the map.

"Ah, and there are the monkeys right there. How about we go start with the monkeys and then head on to the lions? Then the tigers and then children’s petting zoo so we can look for those piggies Dot likes?" Dean suggested, pointing at each suggested station on the map.

Dorothy nodded and turned around to her dad. "Yes!!! Yes, Daddy!"

Dean ruffled her hair and lightly squeezed Castiel's shoulder. Castiel folded up the map and wanted to slip his hand in Dean's but Dot was faster. She beamed up between them and then reached for Cas’s hanging hand to hold onto them both, swinging them gently as they walked.

Dean had a huge smile plastered on his face. He loved that his daughter was so comfortable with Castiel. If what they were trying now worked out, Dot wouldn't feel uncomfortable having Cas in her life. Dean smiled down at his little one and then looked up to catch Castiel’s eyes. He smiled at him and tried to ignore the swelling hope that was blossoming in his chest. If this worked, if they could have this? Dean smiled again.

“Cas?” Dot asked, tugging on his arm. “Are you gonna’ sleep over again tonight when we get home?”

“Probably,” Cas nodded, eyes flicking to Dean’s for a second before settling back on the little girl “Is that okay with you?”

Dot nodded, biting on her lower lip. “Are you always going to sleep over? Are we going to have to get you a bedroom? Or are you going to sleep with my Daddy?” Her innocent childlike questions attracted the gaze of a few people around them and Cas felt himself blush and knew Dean was fighting back his own.

“Um, well… this is actually going to be my last night here, Dotty. I have to go back to New York tomorrow.” She stopped short, dropping both of their hands.

“You’re leaving?” She asked, and Dean could tell she was suddenly on the verge of tears. “You’re not going to be here for my party?”

Dean looked at Castiel expectantly. "Sammy's gonna’ be there. It's on the twenty seventh," he told him.

Castiel knelt down, reaching for Dot’s shoulders to pull her closer, giving her a warm smile. “I have to go back home, Dotty.” he said softly and reached up to push a blonde curl behind her ear. “But that doesn’t mean you’re never going to see me again. We’re friends, right?” She nodded slowly, eyes still wet and glassy as she watched Cas’s face intently. “I’ll try to make it to your party, but if I can’t get it off of work, maybe your Daddy can set up a special call with me on the phone where we can see each other? Does that sound okay?”

Dean knelt down as well and laid his arm around her back.

Dot nodded again. "Okay... but I hope you can come."

Dean smiled and kissed her cheek. "Maybe we can call him anyway during the next weeks, huh?"

"Yesss. Can we, Cas?" she asked, nodding her tiny head encouragingly.

“You can call me anytime.” Cas smiled and reached forward to ruffle her hair. “So no sad faces, okay? I don’t think the lions are going to want to put on a show for us if we’re sad. What do you think?” He looked up at Dean and Dorothy followed his gaze, her eyes wide.

“I’m pretty sure this zoo only runs on happy faces,” Dean nodded his agreement and then laughed as Dot plastered a huge grin on her face and tugged Castiel to his feet.

“Well then… let’s go!” Cas laughed and followed after the happily prancing, little girl.

After the first lion and monkey-house visit they had made their way to the petting zoo. The two men greatly enjoyed Dot’s gleeful squeals and giggles when the little goat-kids and pot-bellied pigs snuffled and tickled her hands as they gobbled the treats she’d offered them.

They had ended up back at the lions three times before Dorothy fell fast asleep snuggled against Castiel’s chest. Halfway through their day, sometime after lunch, she had declared herself too hot and too tired to walk any further, and was happily passed between the two men or rode in the stroller like the tiny princess that she was as they made their way through the rest of the exhibits.

On the way home with Dorothy asleep in her carseat, Dean made a quick stop to pick up something for dinner while Cas waited in the car, watching over the sleeping child. The blue-eyed man leaned his head back against the seat and smiled. He could picture this being his life, eventually. Even though it had only been a little more than a week, Castiel found that he loved every little moment he spent with Dean’s sweet little girl, and the time they shared with her father. As Dean climbed back into the car with the food in tow, Cas gently caught his right hand and lifted it up to kiss the back of it.

“What was that for?” Dean asked, a smile on his lips, despite his apparent confusion.

“I’m just happy,” Cas shrugged, squeezing his hand and then releasing it to take the take out box from Dean and settle it on his lap. “Just happy.”



Castiel sighed, leaning back into the seat of the plane and letting his eyes fall closed. He was grateful that there didn’t seem to be any unruly children on the plane, or large noisy groups. It seemed the only sounds around him were those of soft murmurings and snores. He felt his stomach began churning at the very thought of going back to the apartment he and Balthazar had shared for the past four years. Earlier he had contemplated texting the other man, letting him know he would be stopping by, but just the thought had nearly brought on an anxiety attack so he chickened out.

He would simply show up he decided. After all, his name was on the lease as well. If Balt happened to be there? Well… he would have to deal with it. It wasn’t just going to go away, no matter how badly he wanted it to. If Balt was away at work? Perfect.

Castiel opened his eyes, turning his head to look out the window, but only fluffy white clouds appeared past the oval of plexiglass, blocking any view of the ground far below. For a brief moment he wondered if clouds might be the only view angels ever enjoyed. If so, their lives must be pretty boring he mused. With a sigh he reached for the shade and pulled it down, making the area surrounding him just a little bit darker.

Just three hours ago he had been comfortably cocooned in the blankets on Dean’s bed. By the cool feel of the pillow beside him, he knew Dean had gotten up early to get Dot ready for school. Cas was just preparing to get himself out of bed when the bedroom door suddenly flew open as a tiny blond tornado blew into the room. With a pained cry the little girl launched herself onto the bed, tears streaming down her face as she wrapped her little arms tightly around his neck. With her green eyes swimming with tears, she clung to his neck as if her life depended on it and through broken sobs begged him not to leave.

“It’s not like you’re never going to see me again, Dotty. I promise I’ll be back.” She sobbed inconsolably for a few minutes while he, and then Dean, murmured soft assurances to the child. Finally, as her Daddy rubbed soothing circles across her small back, she nodded shakily, then planted a large, wet kiss on each of her friend’s cheeks before finally letting Dean pull her away.

“I’ll be back, I left coffee on for you,” Dean leaned forward and pressed their lips together in a soft kiss before following his daughter out the door.

Dean had come back and found Castiel still snoozing, wrapped up in the comforter that smelled of Dean. The other man had slid in behind him, and rolled him over gently to kiss him awake. They had explored each other’s mouths, kissing and licking and nipping until both of them were ready to burst. Castiel could tell, just from the lust-blown eyes that had stared down at him and the way Dean was repeatedly licking his lower lip, what he had been going to say.

“I can’t, Dean… You know I have to go home.”

“I know… I do…. I just… I feel like I’m losing you.” Dean whispered, pain reflected in his eyes.

Cas kissed him softly, fingers trailing back through his hair and causing small moans to escape from Dean’s throat.

“You’re not, Dean. But life doesn’t stop, just because we found each other again. I have a job, a house, a life back in New York and it’s waiting for me whether I want it to or not. Deep down,” Cas added, running his thumb over Dean’s cheek, “I think you know that if I did stay? Just moved in and shoved myself into you and Dorothy’s lives? This would fail. We would fail again. This is reality, Dean. We have to do this right this time. Learn about each other again, fall in love again.”

“I hate that you’re the rational one,” Dean whispered back. “And even worse…? I hate that I know you’re right.” And then his lips were once again fused to Cas’.

Cas smiled and lifted his fingertips to brush across his lower lip, still slightly swollen from their goodbye kiss. As hard as it had been to get on the plane? It was necessary. Castiel had to go home, get his affairs in order, and focus on falling back into a relationship with his husband.

Never, in a million years, did Cas ever think he would be thinking about dating and loving Dean Winchester again. It made his heart do a little flutter.



Standing outside his apartment Castiel steeled himself, taking in a few deep breaths before he lifted his keys out of his pocket. He hadn’t passed Balthazar’s car in the parking garage, but that didn’t necessarily mean anything. He wasn’t about to drive through all fifteen floors of the parking garage and look down every aisle to see if he could find the car. He was, however, crossing his fingers as he slipped the key into the door and let himself into the apartment.

It hit him then how strange this was. Everything was… the same. He exhaled and slowly placed his keys on the hook by the door and toed off his sneakers, pulling his wheeled-suitcase in behind him. He didn’t know what he had expected… The apartment still smelled like home, a mix of the vanilla scented candles Balthazar had distributed around the place and his and Balt’s own aftershaves and colognes. The furniture pieces were still in their usual places, the throw blanket slipping off the back of the couch because it never stayed where it was put. The same pictures hung on the walls, the same shoes discarded neatly by the door. His stomach twisted as he stepped further into the apartment and headed towards his bedroom.

Hinge creaking loudly in the stillness of the apartment, Cas hesitantly pushed open the bedroom door, and instantly froze at the sight before him. Balthazar had been asleep in their bed. Castiel’s pillows had been pushed carelessly to the floor.

Suddenly, much to Castiel’s dismay, the sound of the door opening had snapped the man awake. Sitting up awkwardly Balthazar stared blinking at the intruder, first in shock, and then as recognition hit a multitude of expressions had flitted across his face. Finally, he sighed wearily and collapsed back onto the pillows, before pulling the comforter up over his head.

“Just don’t be loud,” Balthazar’s muffled voice groaned from beneath the thick covers.

Castiel swallowed and glanced over towards the walk-in closet… all of his extra luggage had been pulled from the depths of the closet and stacked neatly outside both mocking him and beckoning him forward.

“I can come back…later” Cas said softly to no one in particular, but he saw the figure on the bed stiffen and knew his voice had been heard.

“Why?” Balt shoved the covers aside and sat up, his arms crossing over his bare chest. His hair was sticking up in all directions and he had pillow lines on his face -- something that usually would have Castiel’s heart skipping. Now, Balthazar’s eyes were cold, angry, and all Castiel felt was shame. “Why wait? You made your choice, Castiel. You didn’t wait then when you decided to turn my life upside down. You didn’t wait when you--” Balthazar stopped and shook his head, closing his eyes tightly.

“I’m sorry.” Cas wasn’t sure what else there was to say.

“I know you are. I know you’re sorry, you didn’t mean to hurt me, and we’re both going to be much happier. I know, okay, Cas? I know.” Balt tried to give him a reassuring smile but ended up looking constipated instead. His eyes were shining, tears threatening to fall, and Castiel wanted to run now more than ever.

“I didn’t… I can just…” He sighed, tearing his eyes away from Balthazar and let his gaze drop down to the floor, focusing on the small tear in his sock. A heavy suffocating silence fell over the room. Finally, Cas heard the bed creak and he looked up to see Balt retreating to the bathroom, the door slamming shut and echoing through the apartment.

This is going well… Cas moved over to his bags and slowly pulled them into the middle of the floor, opening them wide.

He started with the closest, pulling out all of his suits, his shirts and ties and laying them carefully in the largest bag. He debated about leaving the hangers, wondering briefly if Balthazar would be upset at the prospect of having to buy more when he got another -- he stopped, hands freezing on the hanger he was holding.

This was really happening. He looked down at the bag, his clothes looked small, foreign in the luggage. He looked towards the bathroom, the silence that greeted him felt almost cold and cruel. He pushed away from the closet and crossed the room, wanting to say something, anything to make this better.

Balthazar was right -- they both would be happy, eventually. He pressed his hand to the door and immediately felt like he was being doused with a bucket of ice water when he heard the quiet sobbing, Balthazar trying his best not to make any noise. Cas could picture him sitting on the side of the tub, a towel clenched in his fists and pressed against his mouth to stop the sound. They would be happy eventually, but right now? Cas felt tears spring to his own eyes, knowing he caused this, knowing he was the selfish one and the reason for Balthazar’s pain.

Quickly, he almost ran back to the closet, yanking things off of their hangers -- if the hanger came, so be it, it not then it could stay -- and shoved things into the bags. Next, he went to his dresser and emptied out each drawer… socks… underwear… undershirts… t-shirts… jeans and shorts all went haphazardly into the next bag.

He grabbed the few books he had left on the nightstand and then opened the drawer. He glanced down and his heart skipped again as he gazed over the things that were theirs. A few toys, a bottle of lubricant, pictures and a stack of anniversary and birthday cards that he had been given throughout their entire relationship. He hesitated, fingers trailing over the items before he sighed and emptied the drawer’s contents into his final bag. Even if he didn’t keep them, leaving them for Balthazar to take care of… seemed cruel.

The rest of the apartment was easy -- They had bought most of the furniture and furnishings together, all things to decorate the home that they shared, and since Castiel was the one walking out of this life, he didn’t deserve to take them. He grabbed a few things that Balthazar wouldn’t miss -- his extended edition Lord of the Rings collection, his own laptop and a medical terminology dictionary. Carefully he packed the few pictures of him with his dad that had hung on the living room wall. He decided to leave the kitchen and the rest of the living room alone and went back into the bedroom.

Everything was packed. Everything that he personally owned was stored in three large bags and sitting, waiting for him at the foot of the bed. He swallowed hard, zipping up the bags and sinking down on the end of the bed. Should he knock on the bathroom door? Let Balthazar know he was leaving?

Cas had been left by a lover once before …so very long ago…and Dean hadn’t… He closed his eyes tightly.

“I’ve separated the joint account,” Balthazar’s voice was hard, loud as it cut through the silence, and Castiel jumped, spinning around to face the now open bathroom door. “I just split it in half, transferred half into your private account. I’ll close the joint account tomorrow… So just… Don’t use the card. You have your credit card, I have mine.”

“Okay,” Castiel whispered, nodding quickly as he searched Balthazar’s face. His eyes were puffy and red, bloodshot. But they were as dry as his cheeks and cold as they stared at Castiel.

“Okay. I think that’s it, really. Unless you want anything else from the apartment?”

“No… No, it’s all yours… belongs here.” Cas’s voice trailed off. Balthazar nodded and tore his eyes away to stare down at the floor. “Balt…”

“I think that’s it then, Cas.” Balthazar cut him off and glanced back up at him. Castiel could see his eyes were again swimming, just like the guilt in his stomach. “So I think it’s probably good if you leave now.”

“Yeah…” Castiel nodded quickly and manhandled the three large bags into his arms. Balthazar didn’t offer to help, probably enjoyed a moment of seeing Castiel struggle, and Cas couldn’t blame him one bit. He bumped down the hallway and when he reached the front door he heard the bedroom door close. He paused only once to remove the keys for Balthazar's parents’ house and to this apartment from his keyring and slipped them over the hook with Balt’s keys so the other man would see them.

And that was that. Castiel let himself out of the apartment after pushing his wheeled-bag into the hallway. He was now without a home he realized as he awkwardly dragged the bags to his waiting car. He loaded them up and slipped behind the wheel, his breath catching in his throat when he finally settled.

He was homeless. He had destroyed a man he had claimed to love. He let the guilt wash over him and immediately pulled out his phone, punching in the number he now had learned by heart, and pressed the phone to his ear, hand shaking.

“Hey, baby,” Dean sounded happy, glad that Cas had called him, and Cas couldn’t stop the sob that broke from his lips. “Cas? What’s wrong? Are you okay?”

“Yes! No… I don’t…” he inhaled, the sound wet and painful as his fingers gripped the steering wheel tighter. “Just… I need you to tell me that this is right, Dean. I need you to tell me that this is going to work and that we’re going to be okay because… because I feel so bad right now. I feel so guilty and wrong and just… awful. I hurt him, Dean. I swore I would never, ever hurt someone that I loved like that. I… I know what that feels like and I didn’t… I couldn’t…”

“Cas… Cas, baby, calm down. Please,” Dean pleaded and Cas fell silent, tears still tracking down his cheeks. “Cas, I’m sorry that you’re going through this, I really, really am. It was never my intention to hurt you, then or even now.”

“I know, Dean,” Castiel wiped the backs of his hands over his eyes. “I just… he’s so sad, Dean. He’s hurt and he was crying, and I did that to him. I was the cause of it.”

“I know, we both were,” Dean replied softly and Cas exhaled, breath and body shaking with the force. “I’m sorry that it happened this way, but I promise you that he will be okay. It sucks now, of course it does, but you fell in love with him for a reason, right?”

“Yeah…” Castiel whispered.

“Someone else will too. Someone else that can give him everything that you can’t anymore. He’s hurting now, and so are you, but you told me he had family around there, right? He will take comfort in them, in his friends, and he will move on.”

“I just…I don’t know what to do…” Cas closed his eyes, and leaned back against the seat, gripping onto the phone as if he was gripping onto Dean.

“Well, first you need to start the car.” Dean’s voice was soft, no trace of laughter or resentment in his voice for the things that Castiel had done; things he deserved to be resented for. Cas nodded and listened, twisting the keys and starting up the car. “Okay, good. Now -- didn’t Chuck get you a hotel room near your hospital, until you could figure things out?”

“Yeah, he did… Special rate or something like that for staying so long…”

“Okay, then you should go there, Cas. Get some of your things unpacked, and then, in my professional opinion, it would be best for you to crawl into bed and get some sleep. Just a small nap, and then look at your options with a clearer head. Okay?”

“Your professional opinion?” Cas found himself chuckling, relaxing slightly, the comforting sound of Dean’s voice in his ear as he backed out of the parking space. “I just wish you were here with me…”

“I know baby, I do too.” Dean whispered back and they stayed on the phone like that, mostly in silence as Castiel drove to the hotel. Dean was there on the phone while he checked in, listened to him grunting as he dragged his bags into his room with the phone pressed between his shoulder and his ear, and he was there to tell Castiel to sleep well, that he loved him and would talk to him in a few hours.

“Love you too, Dean.” Castiel smiled and hung up the phone as he sunk down onto the bed. The room was dark, cool from the AC that had been already running, and despite the comfort he had felt at Dean’s voice-- he now felt alone and cold. Kind of perfect, actually… it was probably what he deserved.

Chapter Sixteen