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So here is how my month thought process has gone, writing-wise:
1. DO NANO
2. ...that's not going to work!
3. I could write a part a day of that Dean/Sam AU!
4. ...I guess that didn't work either!
5. WE'RE KIND OF DOING OKAY
6. I don't feel like writing that. But as long as I write SOMETHING it's like I'm doing Nano, right?
The answer is no, no it is not. Whatever I am doing this month in no way resembles Nano. Like. Not even slightly. Except that I spam my flist a lot. SO YOU KNOW. Whatever. I really was planning to have another part of the Sam/Dean epic love 'verse up today, but then I watched more con videos, so. Yeah. This is how I roll. It's pretty sad.
Title: One Point Five, Tops.
Author: chash
Fandom: Supernatural RPS
Pairing: Jared Padalecki/Jensen Ackles
Rating: PG-13
Warnings: None?
Word Count: 1650.
Summary: It's maybe a little weird to keep living together after the show ends.
Disclaimer: I make this shit up.
Jared didn't even realize it was odd until his mother brought it up.
"You're still living with Jensen?" she asked, a little faintly.
"Yeah," he said, rifling through the fridge. It was Jensen's turn to go shopping, and the lazy bastard hadn't yet. Jared considered the possibility of a mayonnaise sandwich .
"But your show's over," she said.
"Yeah," agreed Jared. "But we're still friends."
His mother heaved a sigh. "I know you are. And honey, you know we adore Jensen, but...don't you think it's strange?"
"Not really," Jared said, too distracted by the complete lack of food prospects to really give the whole thing much of his attention.
But now that he thought about it, it kind of was.
*
"Are we staying here or going to LA?" Jared had asked.
Jensen had looked up from the paper, taken a swig of orange juice. "You got anything you're doing?"
Jared shook his head. "Taking a break for a little while. Not too long, just..." he shrugged. "Kind of tired, man."
Jensen smiled. "Yeah."
"We could stay here," said Jared. "Til we find a place in LA."
Jensen hadn't hesitated. "Yeah, sounds good."
It hadn't seemed weird to Jared at all.
*
Jared likes living with Jensen. Jensen is his best friend in the world, and it turns out Jared doesn't really like living alone. Even before Jensen had moved in, they'd spent most of their time together outside of work; Jared gets lonely. It's why he has dogs, because dogs are almost as good as people for company, but Jensen's better.
And they're going to be seeing less of each other now that the show's gone. If Jared doesn't hold on to him, he might get away.
Jared doesn't honestly think he's going to lose Jensen, he's never thought that. But moving away from each other, going home to separate places--it would feel like the first step.
*
"When are you moving back to LA?" his mother asked.
"Whenever we find a place."
There was a long pause. He realized too late why it happened.
"Jared," she said.
"We talked about this," he said. "He's my best friend."
"People are going to talk."
Jared thought about the last five years. "They already talk."
"Have you thought about it?" she asked.
He didn't ask which part she meant. "Yeah."
It might have been a lie. He wasn't really sure.
*
"Should we still be living together?" he asks Jensen.
Jensen looks at him. "Yes?"
Jared nods, mostly to himself. "That's what I thought."
*
They find a place in LA with a yard that can hold the dogs. It's smaller than their house in Vancouver because LA is more expensive, and because they didn't actually need all the room they had. It was sort of nice to have a whole floor each, but it wasn't necessary.
Jared thought the smaller house might feel constricting, but it doesn't. It feels cozy, nice.
It feels like home.
He comes back from an audition to find Jensen on the couch, with the dogs slobbering on his sweater.
He doesn't examine how it makes him feel.
*
"I still live with Jensen," he told Chad. "Does that make me gay?"
"No," said Chad. "You still like chicks."
Jared considered this. "I do still like chicks."
He could hear Chad typing over the phone. "You're, like, a two. On the Kinsey scale."
Jared hit up Wikipedia. "Not a one?"
"Nah," said Chad. "You've still got that big old gay crush on me, too."
"You and Jensen," Jared agreed.
"You've got the shittiest taste in guys," said Chad. "Really should just stick to chicks. And stop living with Ackles."
"I'd be lonely."
"Get married.
Jared sighed. "I am not taking marriage advice from you."
"Which one of us is married?"
"Which one of us married his costar, got an annulment, and married a girl who was barely out of high school?"
"At least if you marry Ackles, you can't fuck up your show anymore," Chad pointed out.
Jared considered this. "We're moving to LA. It's not legal there anymore."
"Go back to Canada, fag," said Chad, and hung up.
Jared didn't really feel any more enlightened about the whole thing.
*
Jensen lands a five-episode guest spot on Medusa, the CW's new paranormal/fantasy show. They both assume he gets the part because they're hoping to pull in some of the old Supernatural crowd, but it's work, so Jensen doesn't mind. It films in Vancouver, and Jensen heads back up to their old, as-yet-unsold house while Jared stays in LA.
Suddenly, even the small new house is too big, too lonely. He hangs out every night he can, but it's not enough, somehow. He knows exactly why it isn't, too, but that doesn't make anything better.
*
When Jensen had first moved in, they'd talked a lot about it.
"People are going to think we're gay," Jared had said, "but they already think that."
"You smell pretty terrible," Jensen pointed out. "But I have to smell you all the time anyway."
"Yeah, like you smell like roses."
"It's apricot-pear," said Jensen.
"That's why people think we're gay."
"Only about three people know I use apricot-pear body wash."
"And all of them think you're gay."
Jensen waved his hand. "We might get sick of each other," he pointed out.
"I'm already sick of you," Jared noted.
"I'm sick of your face."
"My face is gorgeous. My face keeps us from being canceled."
"Exactly. If it wasn't for your face, I wouldn't work a billion hours a day."
"Don't hate the player, hate the game."
"Did you really just say that?" asked Jensen, starting to laugh.
Jared glared at him. "I got swept up in the moment, shut up."
"I cannot believe you said that."
"So are you moving in?" asked Jared.
"Sure," he said. "Why not?"
After all that trouble, it seemed stupid to not stay together.
*
Jared brings to dogs to Vancouver, because he figures that he's not going to be leaving until Jensen does. He lets himself in and the house feels empty, which is weird. The entire first floor is empty, and he goes upstairs to find that Jensen's stuff has been unloaded in his bedroom.
Jared can't help grinning. Because--he isn't entirely sure what he's saying. Or what he's doing here. He knows that he misses Jensen, that he wants to live with Jensen for the rest of his life, and he's not at Sam levels of codependency or anything, but he's apparently in whatever this is for the long-term.
At this point, it seems like maybe "friends" doesn't cover it anymore.
And if Jensen's sleeping in his bed, maybe Jensen is going to agree.
*
Before he went back to Vancouver, he called his mom.
"What if they were right?" he asked, herding Sadie into her carrier.
"Honey," she said, "we've talked about this. You can't start your conversations with me before I pick up the phone."
"What if me and Jensen--what if something was going on? Would it be okay if we lived together then?"
"Don't start dating Jensen just so you can keep living together," she said, sighing.
"What if I want to?"
"Date Jensen?"
"Yeah."
Harley gave a low whine into the silence.
"I was wondering when you would figure that out," his mother said.
Jared laughed, easy and a little shocked. "You never would believe me when I said I was slow."
*
Jensen locks the door trying to unlock it, and Jared can hear him swear as he fumbles it open. He's already laughing when Jensen manages to get in.
"Jared?"
Jared stands up, feeling awkward and too-large and happy. He hasn't seen Jensen in a week and a half, and it's the longest they've been apart since they moved in together in the first place.
"I missed you," Jared blurts out. It wasn't exactly what he was planning.
Jensen raises his eyebrows, taking in Jared in the house. "I noticed."
"I don't want you to move out."
"I'm not?" says Jensen, looking confused. "I've got a job. You remember those?"
"I know! But, like, ever. I am never going to not want to live with you."
Jensen just looks at him. "I can't tell if you're asking me out or proposing marriage or just want me to be your hetero lifemate."
"Uh," says Jared. "I'm not really sure either."
Jensen rubs his forehead. "So, just to, you know, clarify the exact levels of your insanity, let's go over this. I left for a month-long gig and you went crazy after a week, packed up your dogs, and came to Vancouver to tell me you can't live without me, even though you don't have to?"
"Pretty much."
"Jesus, Jared."
"You're sleeping in my bed," says Jared.
"Yeah, but you're not in it. So it doesn't count."
"You have your own bed."
Jensen shrugs. "You eat yet?"
"No," says Jared. "I gotta do something first."
Jensen sighs, looks put upon. "What."
"I'm gonna kiss you," Jared announces, stalking toward Jensen. "Because either I'm having sex with you for the rest of my life, or I have to find a girl who doesn't care that you're living with us."
"Yeah, that could be tough," says Jensen. He doesn't move away.
It's a good kiss--slow, and kind of thoughtful, Jared thinking through a list of things he wants to try and doing all of them. He sucks on Jensen's bottom lip, his tongue, lets Jensen take the lead for a while. He rests his hands just above Jensen's hips and they just make out for a long time there, in their Vancouver kitchen, learning each other's mouths.
"So?" asks Jensen, huskily, when they finally pull apart.
"Yeah," says Jared, breathless and grinning. "I could do that."
Jensen nods, mostly to himself. "Okay. Me too."
"Awesome. Want to make dinner?"
"Yeah," agrees Jensen. "Sounds good."
1. DO NANO
2. ...that's not going to work!
3. I could write a part a day of that Dean/Sam AU!
4. ...I guess that didn't work either!
5. WE'RE KIND OF DOING OKAY
6. I don't feel like writing that. But as long as I write SOMETHING it's like I'm doing Nano, right?
The answer is no, no it is not. Whatever I am doing this month in no way resembles Nano. Like. Not even slightly. Except that I spam my flist a lot. SO YOU KNOW. Whatever. I really was planning to have another part of the Sam/Dean epic love 'verse up today, but then I watched more con videos, so. Yeah. This is how I roll. It's pretty sad.
Title: One Point Five, Tops.
Author: chash
Fandom: Supernatural RPS
Pairing: Jared Padalecki/Jensen Ackles
Rating: PG-13
Warnings: None?
Word Count: 1650.
Summary: It's maybe a little weird to keep living together after the show ends.
Disclaimer: I make this shit up.
Jared didn't even realize it was odd until his mother brought it up.
"You're still living with Jensen?" she asked, a little faintly.
"Yeah," he said, rifling through the fridge. It was Jensen's turn to go shopping, and the lazy bastard hadn't yet. Jared considered the possibility of a mayonnaise sandwich .
"But your show's over," she said.
"Yeah," agreed Jared. "But we're still friends."
His mother heaved a sigh. "I know you are. And honey, you know we adore Jensen, but...don't you think it's strange?"
"Not really," Jared said, too distracted by the complete lack of food prospects to really give the whole thing much of his attention.
But now that he thought about it, it kind of was.
*
"Are we staying here or going to LA?" Jared had asked.
Jensen had looked up from the paper, taken a swig of orange juice. "You got anything you're doing?"
Jared shook his head. "Taking a break for a little while. Not too long, just..." he shrugged. "Kind of tired, man."
Jensen smiled. "Yeah."
"We could stay here," said Jared. "Til we find a place in LA."
Jensen hadn't hesitated. "Yeah, sounds good."
It hadn't seemed weird to Jared at all.
*
Jared likes living with Jensen. Jensen is his best friend in the world, and it turns out Jared doesn't really like living alone. Even before Jensen had moved in, they'd spent most of their time together outside of work; Jared gets lonely. It's why he has dogs, because dogs are almost as good as people for company, but Jensen's better.
And they're going to be seeing less of each other now that the show's gone. If Jared doesn't hold on to him, he might get away.
Jared doesn't honestly think he's going to lose Jensen, he's never thought that. But moving away from each other, going home to separate places--it would feel like the first step.
*
"When are you moving back to LA?" his mother asked.
"Whenever we find a place."
There was a long pause. He realized too late why it happened.
"Jared," she said.
"We talked about this," he said. "He's my best friend."
"People are going to talk."
Jared thought about the last five years. "They already talk."
"Have you thought about it?" she asked.
He didn't ask which part she meant. "Yeah."
It might have been a lie. He wasn't really sure.
*
"Should we still be living together?" he asks Jensen.
Jensen looks at him. "Yes?"
Jared nods, mostly to himself. "That's what I thought."
*
They find a place in LA with a yard that can hold the dogs. It's smaller than their house in Vancouver because LA is more expensive, and because they didn't actually need all the room they had. It was sort of nice to have a whole floor each, but it wasn't necessary.
Jared thought the smaller house might feel constricting, but it doesn't. It feels cozy, nice.
It feels like home.
He comes back from an audition to find Jensen on the couch, with the dogs slobbering on his sweater.
He doesn't examine how it makes him feel.
*
"I still live with Jensen," he told Chad. "Does that make me gay?"
"No," said Chad. "You still like chicks."
Jared considered this. "I do still like chicks."
He could hear Chad typing over the phone. "You're, like, a two. On the Kinsey scale."
Jared hit up Wikipedia. "Not a one?"
"Nah," said Chad. "You've still got that big old gay crush on me, too."
"You and Jensen," Jared agreed.
"You've got the shittiest taste in guys," said Chad. "Really should just stick to chicks. And stop living with Ackles."
"I'd be lonely."
"Get married.
Jared sighed. "I am not taking marriage advice from you."
"Which one of us is married?"
"Which one of us married his costar, got an annulment, and married a girl who was barely out of high school?"
"At least if you marry Ackles, you can't fuck up your show anymore," Chad pointed out.
Jared considered this. "We're moving to LA. It's not legal there anymore."
"Go back to Canada, fag," said Chad, and hung up.
Jared didn't really feel any more enlightened about the whole thing.
*
Jensen lands a five-episode guest spot on Medusa, the CW's new paranormal/fantasy show. They both assume he gets the part because they're hoping to pull in some of the old Supernatural crowd, but it's work, so Jensen doesn't mind. It films in Vancouver, and Jensen heads back up to their old, as-yet-unsold house while Jared stays in LA.
Suddenly, even the small new house is too big, too lonely. He hangs out every night he can, but it's not enough, somehow. He knows exactly why it isn't, too, but that doesn't make anything better.
*
When Jensen had first moved in, they'd talked a lot about it.
"People are going to think we're gay," Jared had said, "but they already think that."
"You smell pretty terrible," Jensen pointed out. "But I have to smell you all the time anyway."
"Yeah, like you smell like roses."
"It's apricot-pear," said Jensen.
"That's why people think we're gay."
"Only about three people know I use apricot-pear body wash."
"And all of them think you're gay."
Jensen waved his hand. "We might get sick of each other," he pointed out.
"I'm already sick of you," Jared noted.
"I'm sick of your face."
"My face is gorgeous. My face keeps us from being canceled."
"Exactly. If it wasn't for your face, I wouldn't work a billion hours a day."
"Don't hate the player, hate the game."
"Did you really just say that?" asked Jensen, starting to laugh.
Jared glared at him. "I got swept up in the moment, shut up."
"I cannot believe you said that."
"So are you moving in?" asked Jared.
"Sure," he said. "Why not?"
After all that trouble, it seemed stupid to not stay together.
*
Jared brings to dogs to Vancouver, because he figures that he's not going to be leaving until Jensen does. He lets himself in and the house feels empty, which is weird. The entire first floor is empty, and he goes upstairs to find that Jensen's stuff has been unloaded in his bedroom.
Jared can't help grinning. Because--he isn't entirely sure what he's saying. Or what he's doing here. He knows that he misses Jensen, that he wants to live with Jensen for the rest of his life, and he's not at Sam levels of codependency or anything, but he's apparently in whatever this is for the long-term.
At this point, it seems like maybe "friends" doesn't cover it anymore.
And if Jensen's sleeping in his bed, maybe Jensen is going to agree.
*
Before he went back to Vancouver, he called his mom.
"What if they were right?" he asked, herding Sadie into her carrier.
"Honey," she said, "we've talked about this. You can't start your conversations with me before I pick up the phone."
"What if me and Jensen--what if something was going on? Would it be okay if we lived together then?"
"Don't start dating Jensen just so you can keep living together," she said, sighing.
"What if I want to?"
"Date Jensen?"
"Yeah."
Harley gave a low whine into the silence.
"I was wondering when you would figure that out," his mother said.
Jared laughed, easy and a little shocked. "You never would believe me when I said I was slow."
*
Jensen locks the door trying to unlock it, and Jared can hear him swear as he fumbles it open. He's already laughing when Jensen manages to get in.
"Jared?"
Jared stands up, feeling awkward and too-large and happy. He hasn't seen Jensen in a week and a half, and it's the longest they've been apart since they moved in together in the first place.
"I missed you," Jared blurts out. It wasn't exactly what he was planning.
Jensen raises his eyebrows, taking in Jared in the house. "I noticed."
"I don't want you to move out."
"I'm not?" says Jensen, looking confused. "I've got a job. You remember those?"
"I know! But, like, ever. I am never going to not want to live with you."
Jensen just looks at him. "I can't tell if you're asking me out or proposing marriage or just want me to be your hetero lifemate."
"Uh," says Jared. "I'm not really sure either."
Jensen rubs his forehead. "So, just to, you know, clarify the exact levels of your insanity, let's go over this. I left for a month-long gig and you went crazy after a week, packed up your dogs, and came to Vancouver to tell me you can't live without me, even though you don't have to?"
"Pretty much."
"Jesus, Jared."
"You're sleeping in my bed," says Jared.
"Yeah, but you're not in it. So it doesn't count."
"You have your own bed."
Jensen shrugs. "You eat yet?"
"No," says Jared. "I gotta do something first."
Jensen sighs, looks put upon. "What."
"I'm gonna kiss you," Jared announces, stalking toward Jensen. "Because either I'm having sex with you for the rest of my life, or I have to find a girl who doesn't care that you're living with us."
"Yeah, that could be tough," says Jensen. He doesn't move away.
It's a good kiss--slow, and kind of thoughtful, Jared thinking through a list of things he wants to try and doing all of them. He sucks on Jensen's bottom lip, his tongue, lets Jensen take the lead for a while. He rests his hands just above Jensen's hips and they just make out for a long time there, in their Vancouver kitchen, learning each other's mouths.
"So?" asks Jensen, huskily, when they finally pull apart.
"Yeah," says Jared, breathless and grinning. "I could do that."
Jensen nods, mostly to himself. "Okay. Me too."
"Awesome. Want to make dinner?"
"Yeah," agrees Jensen. "Sounds good."