Fanfic: Principles, Chapter VI (WIP) (Jalex)
Okay, so I've decided that I'll post up to chapter VIII before I leave next week. Then when I return in August, I'll eventually post chapters IX through XI. Since those are mostly already written, you won't get any more until September, but at least this way it won't seem like you're waiting so long. :D
Title: Principles, Chapter VI
Rating: T
Pairing: Pre-Justin/Alex
Warning: Thoughts of incest.
Summary: When Justin thinks he might be doing okay, things will never go right for him. Jalex eventually.
Word Count: 1,134
Disclaimer: Sadly, I will never own WOWP.
The next morning, Justin feels better because he’d finished his homework and actually managed to sleep for a while. He doesn’t remember his dream, but figures that’s better than remembering too much. After showering, he uses the new robe Alex bought him, and it feels like it’s going to be a good day until Justin sees Alex sitting at the kitchen table, his heart beating faster for no logical reason.
When he sits beside her, she flashes him a quick smile before stuffing her mouth with an impossibly large piece of pancake. Her puffed cheeks make Max crack up, which causes her to giggle and snort until she’s suddenly choking and struggling for air. She’s not coughing, which makes Justin panic. He scrambles up and pulls Alex from her chair so that she’s standing.
“Can you cough?” Justin asks.
Alex gags and shakes her head, cheeks quickly turning red.
He tries to gather his wits. “All right, uh -- I’m going to do the Heimlich Maneuver on you, okay?”
He waits until she locks eyes with him and nods. Then he moves behind her, where he wraps his arms around her waist. With one hand, he finds her bellybutton before locking his hands together just above it. He hesitates only a second before squeezing his hands in the J motion, as he was taught. Alex is so light, his movement lifts her from the floor. Justin holds her back more firmly against his chest as he tries again. On the fourth attempt, Alex finally starts coughing out the pancake, and Justin feels like he can breathe again.
“Oh, my poor baby!” Theresa cries, rushing forward with a glass of water and making Alex spit out the food before taking a drink.
Alex’s stomach quivers beneath Justin’s hands, bringing him back to the situation where he’s now keeping her body unnecessarily close to his. Though she’s clasping his forearm, also holding him close, and he’s having the wrong reaction. He quickly releases her, backing away until he feels like he’s a safe distance, leaning against the back of the couch. He’s sweating and feels like he might need another shower.
When everyone’s made sure Alex is all right, Jerry comes to Justin’s side, clamping a strong hand on his shoulder. “I think you just saved your sister’s life. I‘m so proud of you, son.”
With no reasonable feelings supporting him, Justin smiles a little in return. He wants to respond in a way that will make light of everything, but inside, he’s shaking more than he wants to admit. Part of him can’t help but wonder what would have happened if he hadn’t been successful, while another part -- one he wishes he could ignore -- is only thinking about how it felt to have Alex pressed against him. Thanks to hormones, that second part is quickly winning over the first, and Justin has the urge to puke, though he hasn’t even eaten yet. The feeling’s only worsened because he can’t stand his father’s happy face when he’s thinking about his sister in a way that’s sure to get him disowned.
He dashes up the stairs to the bathroom and settles next to the toilet, but after a minute (to his amazement), nothing’s happened. He’s still queasy, so he rinses his face with cold water before resting on the edge of the bathtub, head nearly between his knees. There’s a knock on the open door, and he looks up to see Alex, only for his stomach to start doing somersaults again. Her eyes are watery and red when she sits beside him, too close for Justin’s comfort.
She doesn’t say anything, and the silence is unnerving. He starts to feel bad because he should be thinking about her well-being, so without looking at her, Justin asks, “Are you okay?”
“My throat kind of hurts, but I’m fine thanks to you.” She hesitates before continuing. “Are you really sick? I thought maybe you were faking yesterday so you could avoid me.”
“Why would I do that?” He tries to laugh it off as he hangs his head low again.
“I don’t know. Does it have something to do with. . . .” She stops, making Justin look over his shoulder at her.
“With what?” he asks, a sinking feeling forming somewhere in his chest.
“With -- um -- never mind.” Her cheeks turn red, and this time Justin knows it’s not because she’s choking. Her dark eyes lift away to stare at the ceiling. “I just came in to say thank you. . .for saving my life, you know?”
Justin nods, his throat suddenly thick with feelings he wouldn’t dare voice. “Well, uh, I -- I don’t know what I’d do without you, so yeah.”
He’s looking back at the white tile when Alex bumps their sides together. “Haven’t I been saying that all along?”
“Oh, I think it’s been the other way around. Do you know how many times I’ve had to save you?” He sits up straight and knocks his shoulder against hers.
“Pfft.” She looks away again, and he thinks she won’t answer when he hears a soft, “A lot. But never like this.”
“. . .Yeah.” Thankfully, his nerves have calmed a bit.
“Makes a bathrobe seem kind of pathetic.”
Justin laughs at Alex’s unexpected comment. He’s surprised when she leans her head against his shoulder, wrapping both her arms around his.
“I’m glad you’re my brother,” Alex says, and it goes straight to Justin’s heart. He can’t decide if it’s a good or bad thing because he feels happy, but he also feels regret for something that scares him. When she rubs his arm with her hand, fingers moving in small, gentle circles, there’s a tightening in Justin’s chest, and he almost can’t take it.
“What are you doing?” He barely manages to speak, and he’s not sure she heard him, but then Alex freezes and slowly moves away.
Putting her hands in her lap, she says, “Nothing.”
Justin stands quickly, trying to gain control of his heartbeat. “I-I guess we should get ready to leave.”
“You still look sick.” It’s her way of showing concern, Justin knows. What he doesn’t know is how to feel about it. He should be okay with her caring about him, but instead, he wants her to care in a different way.
“I’ll be all right,” he eventually says. “What about you?”
“Fine, I guess.” Alex stands as well and leaves before him.
He watches her until she turns the corner, out of sight. When Justin catches his reflection in the mirror, he hates how his outside appearance remains the same, because he now knows his heart really is changing, and he feels like a monster because it may not be entirely against his will.