Haven fic: Star Light, Star Bright (A/D, A/N, PG-13, 1/1)
Title: Star Light, Star Bright
Author: Shane Vansen
Category: Audrey/Duke, Audrey/Nathan, ANGST, speculation/future fic, sort of H/C
Spoilers: Specifically Stay, but let's say anything through Real Estate is fair game, just in case
Rating: PG-13 (language)
Length: ~1500 words
Disclaimer: It's probably best that they're not mine; I'd screw it up. Haven, its characters and storylines, and the overall concept belong to people much more creative than I. (Besides, if I were in charge, there would not be this much angst.)
Summary: It's Audrey's last night in Haven. (spoilers for Stay and S3's general storyline.)
Author's Notes: As a heads up: mostly one-sided Audrey/Duke, ultimately Audrey/Nathan. Not everyone's cup of tea, I know, so fair warning. :)
Thanks once more to december21st for betaing on short notice.
Never gonna happen in a million years, but the muse doesn't care.
***
The temperature's dropped sharply in the past half-hour even though the sun hasn't yet dipped below the horizon, but Duke can't be bothered to go back inside. The chill suits the occasion perfectly, he thinks; the clear sky, on the other hand, just doesn't fit. It should be pouring rain right now.
Behind him, the Gull is quiet in a way it only ever is in the wee hours of the morning. Given the situation, Duke didn't feel right having customers happily going about their lives right under Audrey's apartment; it's too much like rubbing salt in the wound. There's a sign on the door telling potential patrons that the restaurant is closed for the next few days. He hasn't bothered to explain why.
There are footsteps on the deck and Duke scowls to himself briefly, in no mood to deal with someone who can't read the closed sign. When he turns, though, it's not a customer at all. "Audrey," he says, surprised to see her. "What are you doing here?"
"Last I checked, I still live here," she tells him as she leans on the railing next to him. "I am caught up on my rent, aren't I?"
She's giving him a wide smile that a perfect stranger would be able to tell is forced and Duke feels the knot in his chest twist a little tighter. "All paid up," he agrees, playing along, but he just can't keep up the pretense, not even for a few minutes. Not tonight of all nights. "I just thought you'd be... somewhere else." With someone else is what he means.
Audrey's smile falters and she twists around so that she's looking out across the water instead of at him. "Where else would I be?" she asks, the question sounding rhetorical, maybe somewhat wistful, and then she glances over at him and adds, "Besides, this isn't a bad place to spend my last hours."
He really has no answer for that.
They watch the sunset together in silence. Audrey starts shivering not long after the sky begins to darken and Duke puts an arm around her, pulling her closer. "Thanks," she murmurs, resting her head against his shoulder.
"Any time," he returns without thinking, then realizes that that's an offer that's really only good for a few more hours and winces.
"It's okay," Audrey says before he can apologize. "Believe it or not, I keep forgetting too. Before I came down here, I was checking my alarm clock to make sure it was set for the right time tomorrow."
"How can you stand it?" he bursts out. "I'm freaked out half the time knowing that someone with a tattoo is going to kill me someday. You know you're going to be gone before morning and you're just standing here, calm as can be."
She lets out a huff of breath that's almost a laugh. "It took seven weeks to get to this point. You just missed most of the bad moments. Besides, I don't know that you could say I'm calm right now; I'm just kind of numb. I think it still hasn't really sunk in yet, to be honest."
He wraps his other arm around her shoulders and she turns into him, settling both her arms around his waist in a hug. Audrey's quiet, which she almost never is. "What's going through your head?" he asks.
"How much I'm going to miss this place." Her voice is low, muffled against his chest, but he hears every word. "I know I'll probably be back but I won't remember any of this. I won't remember what I've learned about my past and everything I've done here. I won't remember you or Nathan or anyone else. And that's almost worse than the idea of just dying."
By now her voice is thick, choked, and Duke's eyes start to burn with the inevitability of it all. "We'll remember for you," he promises, his own voice rougher than usual. "We'll remember everything, and we'll share it all with you when it's time for you to come back, even though you'll have no idea who we are and you'll think we're all insane."
She makes a sound that was probably supposed to be a laugh but comes across as a sob. "Thanks," she murmurs. "That helps, actually."
"Anything," he assures her. "Absolutely anything I can do, just ask and I'll do it."
Her arms tighten around his waist and he follows suit, burying his face in her neck as he squeezes her back hard. "I'm going to miss you, Audrey Parker."
He doesn't know how long they stand there, only that it's almost full dark by the time she pulls back. She doesn't go far, though, so he doesn't let go entirely, just lets his hands fall to her waist, wanting to hold on to her for as long as possible. "Duke," she starts, "I need you to do something for me, after I'm gone."
"Name it."
"Keep an eye on Nathan for me."
He stares at her like she's nuts. "Seriously?" She gives him one of those looks and he holds up his hands defensively. "Sorry. It's just, you've noticed that he doesn't much like me, right?"
Her lips quirk up in a half-smile. "I know. But he doesn't have anybody else, not really, and I don't know how he's going to take me leaving but I don't think it's going to be good. It'll help if I know someone will be looking out for him."
"Audrey, I-" Duke falters, not sure what to say or how to say it. I'm not sure I'm going to take it very well either is the first thing to spring to mind but he can't put that on her, not tonight. If he's been too chickenshit to tell her and she hasn't figured it out by now, it's a conversation they're never going to have and that's entirely on him.
It's her fault, he decides. She had to go and believe that he's a good man, making him live up to her expectations, and now he's going to do the most selfless thing he's ever done in his life and she won't ever know.
"You should be with him tonight," he says, even though it's the last thing he wants. He's neither stupid nor blind, though, so he knows it's the truth.
Audrey stares at him, then looks away. "He doesn't want to see me."
He has to laugh when he hears that, though it's short and sharp and not at all humorous. "Audrey, there is nothing in the world Nathan would want more than for you to be there with him right now. Trust me on this."
The security light illuminates her face enough for him to see her expression, hopeful but oddly insecure. "You think so?"
"It's been blatantly obvious to half of Haven that that man's been in love with you for months. Whatever you've said or done that makes you think he doesn't want to see you, believe me, you couldn't be more wrong."
She comes up on her toes and kisses him so fast he barely has time to respond before she's sliding her arms around him in another hug. "Thank you."
He's slow to release her, knowing that this is goodbye and not ready to say it just yet. But he's the one who's sending her away to another man and now he has to let her go. It's all part of being this good person that she believes him to be, even if it hurts like hell.
"Duke," she says, and he has to bite the inside of his cheek to keep from crying because she's got tears rolling down her cheeks and, fuck, he knew it would hurt but he had no idea it could be this painful. "Thank you, for everything. You've been a good friend."
"Yeah." Friend, he thinks, but that's his own fault and it's something he'll learn to live with. "You too." Before she can turn away he adds, "Hey, Audrey?" She hums a question at him. "Do me a favour before you go?"
"Anything," she says immediately, echoing his words from before.
"Try to convince Nathan to let up on me, would you?"
And then she's laughing through her tears, and Duke's glad that the last memory he'll have of her is a moment when she's happy.
He doesn't watch her leave. He listens to her footsteps fade as she walks away and, not too long after that, hears the sound of her car as she pulls out of the Gull's parking lot. When he's sure she's not coming back he goes inside to grab a jacket and a bottle of scotch and heads upstairs to sit in one of the Adirondack chairs on Audrey's deck, staring up at the stars scattered across the clear night sky.
When the meteor storm hits in the early hours of the morning, he lifts the bottle in a salute and toasts to Audrey Parker.
--end--
(Just a reminder: I am as spoiler-free as possible, so nothing about upcoming episodes, please!)
Author: Shane Vansen
Category: Audrey/Duke, Audrey/Nathan, ANGST, speculation/future fic, sort of H/C
Spoilers: Specifically Stay, but let's say anything through Real Estate is fair game, just in case
Rating: PG-13 (language)
Length: ~1500 words
Disclaimer: It's probably best that they're not mine; I'd screw it up. Haven, its characters and storylines, and the overall concept belong to people much more creative than I. (Besides, if I were in charge, there would not be this much angst.)
Summary: It's Audrey's last night in Haven. (spoilers for Stay and S3's general storyline.)
Author's Notes: As a heads up: mostly one-sided Audrey/Duke, ultimately Audrey/Nathan. Not everyone's cup of tea, I know, so fair warning. :)
Thanks once more to december21st for betaing on short notice.
Never gonna happen in a million years, but the muse doesn't care.
***
The temperature's dropped sharply in the past half-hour even though the sun hasn't yet dipped below the horizon, but Duke can't be bothered to go back inside. The chill suits the occasion perfectly, he thinks; the clear sky, on the other hand, just doesn't fit. It should be pouring rain right now.
Behind him, the Gull is quiet in a way it only ever is in the wee hours of the morning. Given the situation, Duke didn't feel right having customers happily going about their lives right under Audrey's apartment; it's too much like rubbing salt in the wound. There's a sign on the door telling potential patrons that the restaurant is closed for the next few days. He hasn't bothered to explain why.
There are footsteps on the deck and Duke scowls to himself briefly, in no mood to deal with someone who can't read the closed sign. When he turns, though, it's not a customer at all. "Audrey," he says, surprised to see her. "What are you doing here?"
"Last I checked, I still live here," she tells him as she leans on the railing next to him. "I am caught up on my rent, aren't I?"
She's giving him a wide smile that a perfect stranger would be able to tell is forced and Duke feels the knot in his chest twist a little tighter. "All paid up," he agrees, playing along, but he just can't keep up the pretense, not even for a few minutes. Not tonight of all nights. "I just thought you'd be... somewhere else." With someone else is what he means.
Audrey's smile falters and she twists around so that she's looking out across the water instead of at him. "Where else would I be?" she asks, the question sounding rhetorical, maybe somewhat wistful, and then she glances over at him and adds, "Besides, this isn't a bad place to spend my last hours."
He really has no answer for that.
They watch the sunset together in silence. Audrey starts shivering not long after the sky begins to darken and Duke puts an arm around her, pulling her closer. "Thanks," she murmurs, resting her head against his shoulder.
"Any time," he returns without thinking, then realizes that that's an offer that's really only good for a few more hours and winces.
"It's okay," Audrey says before he can apologize. "Believe it or not, I keep forgetting too. Before I came down here, I was checking my alarm clock to make sure it was set for the right time tomorrow."
"How can you stand it?" he bursts out. "I'm freaked out half the time knowing that someone with a tattoo is going to kill me someday. You know you're going to be gone before morning and you're just standing here, calm as can be."
She lets out a huff of breath that's almost a laugh. "It took seven weeks to get to this point. You just missed most of the bad moments. Besides, I don't know that you could say I'm calm right now; I'm just kind of numb. I think it still hasn't really sunk in yet, to be honest."
He wraps his other arm around her shoulders and she turns into him, settling both her arms around his waist in a hug. Audrey's quiet, which she almost never is. "What's going through your head?" he asks.
"How much I'm going to miss this place." Her voice is low, muffled against his chest, but he hears every word. "I know I'll probably be back but I won't remember any of this. I won't remember what I've learned about my past and everything I've done here. I won't remember you or Nathan or anyone else. And that's almost worse than the idea of just dying."
By now her voice is thick, choked, and Duke's eyes start to burn with the inevitability of it all. "We'll remember for you," he promises, his own voice rougher than usual. "We'll remember everything, and we'll share it all with you when it's time for you to come back, even though you'll have no idea who we are and you'll think we're all insane."
She makes a sound that was probably supposed to be a laugh but comes across as a sob. "Thanks," she murmurs. "That helps, actually."
"Anything," he assures her. "Absolutely anything I can do, just ask and I'll do it."
Her arms tighten around his waist and he follows suit, burying his face in her neck as he squeezes her back hard. "I'm going to miss you, Audrey Parker."
He doesn't know how long they stand there, only that it's almost full dark by the time she pulls back. She doesn't go far, though, so he doesn't let go entirely, just lets his hands fall to her waist, wanting to hold on to her for as long as possible. "Duke," she starts, "I need you to do something for me, after I'm gone."
"Name it."
"Keep an eye on Nathan for me."
He stares at her like she's nuts. "Seriously?" She gives him one of those looks and he holds up his hands defensively. "Sorry. It's just, you've noticed that he doesn't much like me, right?"
Her lips quirk up in a half-smile. "I know. But he doesn't have anybody else, not really, and I don't know how he's going to take me leaving but I don't think it's going to be good. It'll help if I know someone will be looking out for him."
"Audrey, I-" Duke falters, not sure what to say or how to say it. I'm not sure I'm going to take it very well either is the first thing to spring to mind but he can't put that on her, not tonight. If he's been too chickenshit to tell her and she hasn't figured it out by now, it's a conversation they're never going to have and that's entirely on him.
It's her fault, he decides. She had to go and believe that he's a good man, making him live up to her expectations, and now he's going to do the most selfless thing he's ever done in his life and she won't ever know.
"You should be with him tonight," he says, even though it's the last thing he wants. He's neither stupid nor blind, though, so he knows it's the truth.
Audrey stares at him, then looks away. "He doesn't want to see me."
He has to laugh when he hears that, though it's short and sharp and not at all humorous. "Audrey, there is nothing in the world Nathan would want more than for you to be there with him right now. Trust me on this."
The security light illuminates her face enough for him to see her expression, hopeful but oddly insecure. "You think so?"
"It's been blatantly obvious to half of Haven that that man's been in love with you for months. Whatever you've said or done that makes you think he doesn't want to see you, believe me, you couldn't be more wrong."
She comes up on her toes and kisses him so fast he barely has time to respond before she's sliding her arms around him in another hug. "Thank you."
He's slow to release her, knowing that this is goodbye and not ready to say it just yet. But he's the one who's sending her away to another man and now he has to let her go. It's all part of being this good person that she believes him to be, even if it hurts like hell.
"Duke," she says, and he has to bite the inside of his cheek to keep from crying because she's got tears rolling down her cheeks and, fuck, he knew it would hurt but he had no idea it could be this painful. "Thank you, for everything. You've been a good friend."
"Yeah." Friend, he thinks, but that's his own fault and it's something he'll learn to live with. "You too." Before she can turn away he adds, "Hey, Audrey?" She hums a question at him. "Do me a favour before you go?"
"Anything," she says immediately, echoing his words from before.
"Try to convince Nathan to let up on me, would you?"
And then she's laughing through her tears, and Duke's glad that the last memory he'll have of her is a moment when she's happy.
He doesn't watch her leave. He listens to her footsteps fade as she walks away and, not too long after that, hears the sound of her car as she pulls out of the Gull's parking lot. When he's sure she's not coming back he goes inside to grab a jacket and a bottle of scotch and heads upstairs to sit in one of the Adirondack chairs on Audrey's deck, staring up at the stars scattered across the clear night sky.
When the meteor storm hits in the early hours of the morning, he lifts the bottle in a salute and toasts to Audrey Parker.
--end--
(Just a reminder: I am as spoiler-free as possible, so nothing about upcoming episodes, please!)