Comments | lolocracy: YOUR TASTE IN EXPLOSIVES IS LIKE, IMPECCABLE, GOOD SIR.

firecracker_bao in lolocracy

YOUR TASTE IN EXPLOSIVES IS LIKE, IMPECCABLE, GOOD SIR.

Jan 09, 2011 00:36

WHO: Zhi and the mysterious craigslister responsible for this advert.
WHEN: January 6th, Saturday, 1 in the morning
WHERE: A dark alleyway along Morong Street
WHAT: ILLEGAL DRUG FIRECRACKER DEALING

( --oh wait what it's just you. )

isn't that illegal?, you all look the same anyways, status: incomplete, it's always the quiet ones, all azns are bros, hey i know you, unacceptable! all of this!, north korea, hong kong, what the derp?, i don't get paid enough for this shit, i solemnly swear i am up to no good, there's this thing called murphy's law

Comments 4

salutethered January 9 2011, 02:49:00 UTC

Hak Soo sat at the bench on Morong St., right next to the alley as planned. He saw the hooded figure appear right at 1AM and was pleased by their punctuality. So pleased that he decided to stay and watch the man for a few minutes; it was imperative that he learn about human behaviour in the dark, clearly. What better way to gather data then to be a part of the experiment yourself? After fourteen minutes of zero recognition and fully simulating what it felt like to be in the belly of a whale, Hak Soo spoke. "Are you firecracker bao?"

He fingered the money in his backpocket and pulled his hat over his head further. If this man was not he, then. Well, Hak Soo could always just skulk off in the other direction, or say "Excuse me", feigning a sneeze. The Tsang Tao firecrackers were not cheap to come by in the States and were nearly impossible to get through customs (since they were illegal in fifty of the states in the United States). Tugging on his bat once more, he repeated himself: "Are you firecracker bao?"

firecracker_bao January 9 2011, 10:48:43 UTC

After waiting for so long, Zhi’s nerves were finally beginning to calm down and he was entertaining himself by playing a game of count-the-wads-of-chewing-gum from where he stood. He had just spotted the 8th piece, lodged in a crack by his feet when words suddenly echoed down the alley. Startled, he turned quickly to see the figure silhouetted in the moonlight. It took a moment to process that they had said firecracker bao and not ILLEGAL FIRECRACKERS, NOW, but by the time he opened his mouth to say something, the figure repeated his question once more ( ... )

salutethered January 9 2011, 19:52:52 UTC

"Yes, I am." Hak Soo stepped forward into the beam of the streetlight. He wasn't very sure how to deal with the proceedings of illegal trade in person, but he had watched enough dramas for that.

Clearing his throat, he said quietly. "If you hold out the package, I'll hold out the payment, and we can have a tidy exchange." He just hoped that he wouldn't be ripped off $90 receiving fake goods. For good measure, he pulled up his hat, perhaps as assurance that he wasn't a thug, but a misfortunate individual oppressed by American fear of Chinese firecrackers. He didn't think he looked like a criminal. At least, not what society believed they looked like in general.

And if the other person was a criminal, then, well. Hak Soo always had back up (in this case,a can or two or five of pepper spray).

REVIVING THIS FROM BEYOND THE GRAAAAAVE /A/ firecracker_bao March 4 2011, 09:41:50 UTC

However, he was being ripped off big time, considering the original price of the firecrackers-- a child could have afforded them with simply their pocket money. What the man didn't know wouldn't hurt him, though, and so Zhi nodded his agreement and hefted up the bag, ready to pass it over and receive his completely well-deserved payment in exchange ( ... )