Advice sought from people with taste who understand gender

[livredor]

For the first time in my life, I'm dating someone who celebrates Christmas. This means I really ought to get him a Christmas present. I was racking my brain for ideas, when I remembered that the Beau doesn't own a teapot, and it's something of a tradition for me to give my sweeties teapots.

The thing is, last time we discussed teapots, cartesiandaemon said that

Comments

[lavendersparkle]

The Bodum teapots look quite butch to me.

Oddly enough, this year is the first Christmas I've ever spent with a significant other, despite being in long term relationships almost continuously for the last six years. My first boyfriend's mother had issues sharing and I've gone to Limmud every Christmas since I started dating Alec.

[livredor]

Ah, and this year they decided to break tradition and not do Limmud over Christmas, right? What are your plans for Christmas itself, then?

[lavendersparkle]

It's not a break from tradition, it's Christmas this year being on a Thursday. I'm spending Christmas with Alec's parents on the grounds that neither of us is allergic to their house and they live in North West London so we can get the Jew coach to Limmud.

[livredor]

You know, I really love how it's the queer women on my flist who are able to give me the best advice about masculinity, without assuming that masculine simply means "not girly" or else "neanderthal". Thank you. And yes, in the end the teapot that we both like is black with dark jewel blues and greens for the decoration, and squarish but not to the point of being ugly and blocky. So I feel very comforted that this was your immediate suggestion. (The Bodum ones would have been the fallback if I couldn't find anything more special, because while they're gender appropriate and aesthetically appealing, they're also a really standard accessory for everybody in my peer group who has some pretension to style in home decor, so it would have been a bit boring

[anonymous]

The following is fairly generic advice

[hatam_soferet]

(1) Oh, nonsense. If you bring a box of choccies, that's quite sufficient.
(9) It's nice!

[anonymous]

(1) Be prepared though that everyone who is there might give you a present. Probably best to ask young Master Scorton to negotiate in advance if you want to keep present-giving to a minimum.

[lavendersparkle]

(!) Ah, but if you are enough of a couple to be going to Christmas together you are enough of a couple to give joint gifts.

[deborah_c]

Whittards have a good range, and even have a shop in Cambridge. On looking at it, mind you, all the "manly" options (FSVO "manly") appear to be from Bodum...

[simont]

But I have no idea what makes a teapot masculine

I'm afraid all I can hear is my inner 13-year-old suggesting a really big spout.

[livredor]

Um, thanks... That is highly amusing, but now I shall have a terrible time not paying the wrong kind of attention to the angle and length and thickness of all the teapot spouts I happen to look at...