Comments | lisarene: Give and Take

lisarene

Give and Take

Oct 21, 2005 16:54

It seems like there have been several things lately that I've wanted to blog about, then decided not to for one reason or another.

First, I was going to blog about how I hate it when people are passive/aggressive. I was angry at someone whom was being passive/agressive with me, and began to wonder why it is that people just don't feel like they ( Read more... )

my fanfic, icons, real life

Comments 10

anonymous October 24 2005, 04:52:17 UTC

Concerning point the first ( ... )

elijahsback October 24 2005, 04:53:16 UTC

Sorry, I thought I was logged in. That was me telling people to get their fake niceness out of their asses. I don't want someone else taking credit for that.

anonymous October 26 2005, 01:25:19 UTC

"Pissed off"? Really? Since you want me to be honest, I am offended.

lisarene October 26 2005, 21:18:42 UTC

I'd like to say that I'm sorry you are offended, but since I don't know who you are, I'm not sure what you're offended by? Unless you posted this as a joke, in which case, it's kinda funny :)

Oh Lisa! almond_joyz October 26 2005, 03:59:33 UTC

You are SO funny!

anonymous November 1 2005, 22:49:34 UTC

Have you considered posting what you said about your fan fiction writing on the writers' guild blog?

mh

anonymous November 6 2005, 01:10:38 UTC

I'm still thinking about this. What you say about wanting friends to speak the truth in love is right on. I think friends owe that to each other.

Thinking about passive-aggressive, I think I'd rather have passive or passive-aggressive with conversation. Somehow the thought of all the passive-aggressives without the passive is pretty scary.

From my perspective, honesty is just honesty. Sometimes love chooses to be still and sometimes love choses to speak. But I think, either way, if it's love, it will be honesty in the context of caring more about the other person than about him or herself. In alot of situations, that isn't the context. If that honesty isn't love, do I still want it? I don't know.

I guess I'd rather spend more energy searching myself to make sure I don't need to change than assuming that someone else does.

I have lots of respect for people who are honest.

anonymous November 6 2005, 01:11:49 UTC

lisarene November 6 2005, 17:00:11 UTC

"I guess I'd rather spend more energy searching myself to make sure I don't need to change than assuming that someone else does."

Yes, I could stand to do more of this. My blockage with self-examination in situations like this is that I've spent so much of my life feeling like things are my fault. I'm not good enough, I don't have enough faith, etc. And I've only recently realized that that kind of thinking is what led to my downward spiral of self-loathing and depression. So, in an attempt to reverse that cycle and swing the other way, I now lean more towards confrontation. I'm more likely to think "You are angry with me, but I will not allow your anger to make me feel bad about myself or deliberate all the ways in which I am wrong and you are right. So I will push back until you are honest with me and then maybe we can work things out."

I'm not saying you are wrong to prefer passiveness, this is just my history. Thanks for your thoughts!

anonymous November 6 2005, 18:17:43 UTC

Really good point,Lisa. Thanks!
mh