Chat Exchange Fic: "Strange Tortures"
This actually came from a recurring dream I was having in Biloxi. It was one short shot that haunted me for the whole week and made it possible for me to sleep deeply on a steel bunk bed in a completely different environment. I slept like a rock for the whole week, probably as much from the work as from the dream... but I had to write it.
But then the modern Ukitake in my brain wouldn't lay a finger on Kira until he'd really talked and negotiated what he needed to negotiate. Which is why this monster is as huge as it is. Sorry.
This takes place after calmingeffects's Gin/Kira series. You don't have to read it before reading this. There is, amusingly enough, actually a piece that I've already written that comes before this as well; but I'll be posting it in June for the springkink community. I'll probably put it in my fic list in the right order.
Title: Strange Tortures
Fandom: Bleach
For: calmingeffects through chat_exchange
Pairing: Ukitake/Kira
Prompt: "Strange Torture"
Word Count: 8508 (I did say it was a monster)
Rating: NC-17
Warnings: A little bondage, explicit sex between two men, and lots of talking about BDSM. Sorry.
Summary: Kira hears rumors about Ukitake-taichou and goes to him because of them so he can scratch an itch left by Gin.
Disclaimer: I don't own or make money off of Bleach. It's all fictional. Really. And all characters having sex are consenting adults.
This was not beta'ed, so all the mistakes are mine.
Kira Izuru found himself shaking as he entered the compound for the Thirteenth Division. He knew he was here for a reason, but it seemed like such a stupid reason the more he turned it over in his mind. What did little Hanatarou know about these things? How could he trust a taichou? He had trusted Gin with everything he was, and from that trust Kira had betrayed himself, his friends, and the whole of the Gotei 13.
And with troubles like that, why was he so worried about something as trivial or stupid as sex?
Kira stopped outside the doorway into the compound.
Suddenly, there were two bursts of reiatsu and two figures dropped to one knee on either side of him. Kira felt the rock hard reiatsu of Sentarou and the new growth flexible reiatsu of Kiyone splash down next to him.
"Kira-fukutaichou!"
"Kira-fukutaichou!"
"I welcome you to the Thirteenth, how may I serve you?" Sentaruo said gruffly.
"No! Let me help you? What do you need? A coordinated training exercise? Some help with paperwork?" Kiyone asked, near pleading.
Kira eyed the two Third Seats. Some part of him cynically commented that these two were a master's wet dream. Do anything you wanted, huh?
In the back of his head Wabisuki stirred. But look at them. They are not humbled the way you were. See their pride, their arrogance?
Kira blinked as the two Thirds started squabbling over which of them would help him out the best. They certainly weren't like him. They had no trace of being cowed, of being... forced to guess correctly exactly what the object of their entreaties needed. They were both throwing out ideas like a fountain, showing off everything they could think of, testing those ideas against each other. And they had no fear of what it was he wanted or of getting it wrong.
Kira frowned a little over what that implied of their captain. When they both cried out at the frown and came up with more ridiculous ideas, he interrupted them. "I need to see Ukitake-taichou, if it's okay. I didn't know his schedule..."
"You should have made an appointment!" Kiyone cried. "Then you would have known..."
"Stupid! It's obvious he happened to come by on some other errand and just wanted to drop in and see him!" Sentarou yelled.
Kira was taken aback a bit by that. "But... is he..."
"Ukitake-san's just doing paperwork. He likes getting interrupted then," Kiyone said, comfortingly. "It's okay. I'll show you the way."
"No! I'll show him the way!"
The two of them elbowed each other on the way to Ukitake-taichou's office, and both of them knocked to announce him. From outside the office, Kira felt the sea calm depth of Ukitake-taichou's reiatsu. Breathless with suppressed anxiety, Kira stumbled into the office, into the depths of a power so alike and so different from Ichimaru's, only to see Ukitake-taichou with his brush in hand, poised over paper, and one eyebrow cocked in surprise.
"Ah. Good... uhm... is it morning or afternoon, Kotsubaki?" Ukitake asked, blinking owlishly.
Kira jolted at Ukitake addressing his subordinate by family name and without a honorific, respectful familiarity.
"Morning, sir!" Sentarou answered easily.
"Ah. Good morning, Kira-fukutaichou, how may I be of assistance?"
Kira looked at the mild-mannered, open face before him and just couldn't, for the life of him, think of the man in front of him as a sadist. It was just... wrong. Hanatarou had to be mistaken. Or maybe Kira had remembered it wrongly. He'd been half-faint with blood-loss and pain, he must have fucked it up. His hope was just an illusion, a mad dream, impossible.
Kira shook his head, and his voice betrayed him and broke when he said, "I... I'm... I'm sorry... I think I must have been mistaken." He turned to go.
"About what?" Ukitake-taichou asked.
"Nu... Nothing. I'm sorry to have bothered you, sir." Kira felt faint as he turned away.
"Kira. Stay."
Kira's eyes closed. He stopped, a shiver worked from his head to his toes at that deep voice suddenly sharpened to command.
"Thirds. Go." Two puffs of flash step and the Third Seats were gone.
There was a swirl in that ocean of power, and then a small sigh, "They are truly gone. And you. You're not walking out that door with that wild mix of fear, arousal, and disappointment without at least saying something as to why."
"Something," Kira said and waited. The center of all that power walked up to him. He cringed, expecting to get hit for his presumption.
He opened his eyes when he heard a small puff of laughter. "I guess I asked for that."
Mild-mannered eyes looked at him. "You... you're not a sadist are you?" Kira blurted out.
Ukitake blinked.
"You didn't hit me for... for giving you lip," Kira explained.
Ukitake surprised the hell out of Kira by laughing. "No. I like humor. As to the other question... I am a sadist. I have just a little masochism. I switch between top and bottom. I can be a dominant, but it's harder for me outside of the chain of command. I cannot submit, and I'm definitely not a master or slave."
"Those are all different?" Kira asked, bemused.
"You don't know that?" Ukitake's brown eyes looked concerned. "Then we do need to talk. What kind of food do you like? And is it even close to lunch time?"
"You lost track of the time?"
Ukitake looked sheepish, "I was writing. I don't really notice the time when I'm writing."
"What were you writing?"
"A story about a flower that talked with a bug and how the bug goes off to see things to tell the flower. It's a kids' book. One of my great-great-grand-something-nephews worked out the plot with me and he's doing the pictures."
Kira put his head in his hands. "A sadist that writes kids' books."
Ukitake laughed. "I told you I liked humor."
"It is lunch time. I like... anything..." Kira said, distracted.
"No preferences at all? Even between Western food and Japanese food?"
"None. You pick."
Ukitake shook his head, "This does not bode well."
But before Kira could ask what he meant by that, Ukitake-taicho took off his captain's haori and hung it up by the door. "I think I'm off official duties now. Let's go."
They ended up at a little teriyaki place nearly on the opposite side of Seireitei. It was crowded, with plenty of tables and lots of people working their way through what smelled like really excellent food. The decorations were colorful and well done, the chef staff yelled their greeting with gusto, and within thirty seconds of a customer leaving their table, the table was sparkling clean and ready for them.
Kira noted that, somehow, Ukitake had wrapped his reiatsu around himself, minimizing his impact on the souls around them. He'd never seen Ichimaru do that, or most of the other Captains, they'd always seemed to enjoy making weaker souls tremble or fall over when they were near. Kira frowned and tried to draw his own reiatsu in and got a glance from Ukitake and a small nod.
Kira sat opposite Ukitake and looked around with wonder. "We're going to talk about... that, here?"
Ukitake studied his menu, "After we order."
"But there's... people here. They'll hear us." Kira said, worried.
"Hm. How often do you hear the whole of a conversation when people are talking at a normal tone, when that lady is telling her girlfriends about how badly her beautician messed up her hair last week?" Ukitake tilted his head in the direction of the very loud, very animated woman gesturing with beautifully painted nails.
"Oh," Kira digested that while staring blankly at his menu.
The waitress came up, "Hey, what can I getcha?"
"Uhm.. I'd like a short rib lunch and one of the beef and chicken combinations, please, and some tea," Ukitake said.
"Both meals?" The waitress looked him up and down. "You do not look like you could even fit that in your skinny bod, honey. But it's your dime." She wrote in her pad while Kira choked over his ice water. "What about you, pretty boy?" Kira saw Ukitake bite his lip.
Kira flushed, "Uhm... just the chicken teriyaki, please, and uhm... hot water?"
"Plain jane boy, hm? Okay, not even a bit of spice for your meal?" The waitress grinned and winked at Kira making him blush even harder. "Oh, that's nice," she said. "All right... I'll let you be." She sauntered off.
"What a..." Kira said.
"... nice woman." Ukitake finished. "She was just teasing. I'll have to tell Shunsui about this place. And you are quite pretty."
Kira gaped at Ukitake, who frowned and studied Kira closely.
"How is it that you don't know what a sadist is, and still knew enough to ask me if I am one?" Ukitake asked in a tone that, for Kira, was far too even for the content of the sentence. "And don't tell me it was just a passing fancy and you wandered in off the street on a whim and blurted that out by mistake. You're here."
Kira bit his tongue, and felt his face heat even more than when the waitress spoke to him. "How can you read my mind?"
"I can't. That is why we're talking in a public place. I can read your reiatsu for general emotional content and level of agitation. For most folks it gets stronger the more emotionally upset or focused they are. You are not focused." Ukitake said patiently. "Now. Why. Are. You. Here."
Kira felt pinned by that calm brown gaze. "Yamamoto Hanatarou gave me your name."
Ukitake blinked. "Who?"
"The... uhm... the Seventh Seat of the Fourth Division? He's a little guy, straight black hair..."
"Oh! Right. He's good, but I can't ever remember his name. And he's helped me out... I'm glad he remembered to..." Ukitake frowned.
Kira squirmed in his seat. "Can you please finish a sentence, sir?"
Ukitake grinned. "Sorry. I'm too used to talking with Shunsui. So. Would you like to know the differences in behaviors between sadists, dominants, tops, and masters?"
"Uhm... yes?" Kira wasn't sure if he cared, really, but it was obvious Ukitake wanted to explain things.
Ukitake bared his teeth in something that Kira could not call a smile. "Or do you really not care what you're getting into if you agree to do something with me?"
Kira felt his own anger flare. "Does it really matter? Isn't it all just I agree to go with you and you do what you want with me? Why do we have to talk about it? And why here?"
"Because the food is good?" The waitress said as she stepped in with their food and Kira nearly jumped out of his seat.
"Exactly," Ukitake said smoothly. "The food is excellent."
The waitress deposited all their food neatly and exactly and gave Ukitake a smile and Kira a raised eyebrow, and then went on her way.
"So... why here?" Kira persisted. "It seems stupid, why not just lock ourselves in a bedroom and talk about what we want to do there?"
Ukitake snapped apart his chopsticks and happily breathed the steam off his food. "Well, the food here is good." Kira snorted and Ukitake looked up at him. "Besides that, in a public space I cannot physically coerce you. I cannot intimidate you in this setting. And both of us must behave within socially delimited parameters. For instance, you can't strip naked and try to seduce me into doing something I'd regret, and vice versa. There can be no threats that do not have other consequences in this situation. In a private setting... " Ukitake shrugged. "Given how you came to me, I'm sure you know what can happen in a private setting."
Kira paled. How Ukitake had gotten that from just the fact that Hanatarou had sent him made Kira dizzy to think though.
"What... what if I don't want to do this? What if I just leave?" Kira said, shakily.
"Then I'll pay for our lunches and I might have some leftovers for dinner. Though... I am rather hungry," Ukitake said peacefully after swallowing his mouthful.
"And... and you'll tell everyone I came to you for pain," Kira said bitterly.
Ukitake paused. "Wherever did you get that idea? I'm fairly sure the only name you were given was my own, no?"
Reluctantly, Kira nodded his head.
"I have the Fourth Division give my name and my name only. There are people who need to know that they're not alone," Ukitake said with a sigh. "That does not mean that anyone else's confidentiality is ever broken by me."
Kira thought and started on his food while Ukitake ate his first meal almost without breathing.
Ukitake sighed in satisfaction from the first meal and mournfully looked at his second. "Ah well, first the bulk of what I'd like you to know. The differences, short and succinct. Sadists like to give pain. I, in particular, only like giving pain to someone that really wants it, needs it, likes it, i.e. usually a clear masochist. Tops like to do things to a bottom that the bottom wants. A dominant likes to have control over their submissive, usually involving orders and punishment if the submissive doesn't do as ordered. With some pairings the punishment is actually the fun part of it. With masters and slaves, there is also a level of behavior correcting punishment, where what is done is something the slave would by all means otherwise avoid. You should note, however, that these are my distinctions, and if you do get involved with someone else, you need to ask what their labels mean." Ukitake ticked through all the points on his four fingers. "Any questions?"
Kira thought through one slow mouthful of chicken and rice. "Does that mean that a Sadist isn't always on top?"
"Sadists usually are the ones doing, so... it's rather hard to bottom and be sadistic at the same time, but I've seen it done. I've seen a dominant order her submissive to flog her, and it was amazing." Ukitake said, reflecting.
They ate for a while in silence as Kira processed the information he'd been given.
"So, Kira-kun, what do you now make of the answer I gave you? Would you please explain what your understanding of me now is?"
Kira wracked his brain. "Uhm... the first thing was what you just said... that you like to give pain, but only to people that get off on it. Uhm... you'll give or take other things? You can give orders, but don't... uhm... take them well, and you're just right out of the whole behavior correcting business.... Is... is that it?"
"And... sometimes I can get off on a little pain, applied the right ways," Ukitake said. "Well done. I'm impressed you remembered so much of it when you didn't even know what the terms meant."
Kira smiled tentatively.
"Now, how would you describe yourself?"
Kira blinked and quirked a very crooked grin, "I've been Gin's slave."
Ukitake rocked back, eyes hooding for just a moment. "Bravely said, Kira-kun. Now... what do you want?"
"You just said you aren't a master... so... I guess I don't want..."
"No." Jyuushiro's deep voice stopped Kira's voice. "Do not shape your desires from mine. You must define your own desires."
Kira realized his hands were shaking. He whispered, "I want Gin back."
The brown eyes watched him, listening. When the white-haired captain said nothing at all, Kira shivered all the harder and thought frantically.
"I... I don't... I don't get what all this has to do with... with me. What does what I want have to do with anything? Why... why can't you just..."
"Because in order for me to really enjoy whatever it is that we do, I need to understand that you will enjoy it. Derive joy from it. And I cannot read your mind, Kira-kun. It is much easier if you can tell me." Ukitake brooded a moment, and then reached for his short ribs, giving Kira time to think.
Joy? Joy from any of this? Kira was frightened, more than anything. But the dark desires of his previous captain had imprinted themselves upon his nerves and body. Even pain from the innocent and hapless Hanatarou had aroused Kira embarrassingly. Kira hadn't even been able to masturbate without resorting to self-inflicted damage, and he was so tired of that. Suddenly realizing that, Kira finally found he could talk about it.
"I'm not sure if those things can describe what I want. I... I'm having trouble..." Kira cursed his complexion as he felt himself heat with a blush. But the obvious patience in the man opposite him was a quiet encouragement he hadn't expected. "I seem to need pain or threat in order to orgasm."
"What level of pain or threat?" Ukitake asked.
"Cuts, long slashes, or... or choking..." Kira frowned rather than cry. "I... I wish I didn't need those. But... I guess that makes me a masochist, huh?"
Ukitake nodded solemnly. "A heavy play masochist at that. Hm... asphyxiation, hard to time, but easier on higher level shinigami. We're damned hard to kill."
Kira blinked. "You've done that?"
Ukitake shrugged. "There is very little I haven't done in two thousand years. Go on, please."
"Uhm... okay. I guess I'm a bottom, I like things done to me. I haven't... done things to other people... I don’t like hurting anyone. But I don't know what it would be like to have someone that liked it. I don't ever want to go through a master and slave relationship again, but... it's familiar to me, I think. I miss... some parts of it."
"What parts?" Ukitake gently prodded.
Kira huffed softly, "There were times... when I was just chained and relieved of... well... everything. I didn't have anything I could do, anything to decide, so I just... well... was. I don't know if that makes any sense."
Ukitake nodded. "That makes sense to me."
Kira sagged a little in relief. "You have no idea what it means to me to know I'm not... not crazy or something. Alone in all this."
Ukitake quirked a grin. "Good then. I have one more question. Is there anything you wish to never do or have done to you?"
Kira played with his chopsticks as he thought about that question. "I... I don't like... I don't like broken bones, broken noses, or dislocations. Marks on my face are so hard to explain."
Ukitake winced and Kira blushed quietly.
"I... I don't like it when someone really hurts me for getting things wrong. I don't... don't like... being ashamed all the time." Kira felt like the last was dragged out of him by Ukitake's look of sympathy.
Ukitake nodded, "I can't do humiliation or shame. So... that will be easy enough. I don't do any human wastes or cross-dressing. I don't usually do anything having to do with blood. I have a system for cleaning it up, but it's a lot of effort."
Kira blinked, "People play with human wastes for fun?"
Ukitake shrugged, "Yes, but not me."
"Oh, good." Then Kira absorbed the other. "You... you don't spill blood?"
Ukitake shook his head slowly. "Not without precautions and a lot of prep work and a real understanding of what the benefit to my partner is."
"Then I don't know if this is going to work," Kira said quietly, hearing only that Ukitake wouldn't cut him. "I've gone through this whole torturous conversation for no reason at all."
"Hm. Conversation as torture." Ukitake chuckled quietly. "Give me one chance, Kira-kun. I think I can make this conversation worth your while. From what you've said, your real wish is to figure out if you can be aroused by something other than cuts or blood and being choked. I think I can address that wish."
Kira's eyes widened. After all the things they'd talked about... this man had latched onto an offhand comment made from despair. And it was the one thing he hadn't thought possible.
"Can you come to my quarters tonight, Kira-kun?" Ukitake asked.
"At the Thirteenth Division?" Kira asked, recalling the paper walls of the officers quarters in the Third.
"Yes. Tonight at 7," Ukitake said, watching Kira carefully.
Kira nodded, "It can't hurt to try, can it?"
Ukitake laughed, "Ignoring the double entendre, no. It can't hurt for us to try."
Kira arrived promptly at 7.
When they'd left the restaurant, Ukitake had asked his permission to touch him on his throat. Kira had consented. The white-haired captain then shocked Kira by wrapping his slender hands firmly about Kira's throat. There hadn't been enough pressure to cut off his breath, but he'd felt his pulse pounding against those slender, calloused hands. The captain had studied his hands, muttered, nodded to himself, and then bowed himself off to his offices.
Kira had been half-aroused the rest of the afternoon simply from remembering that firm, warm, sudden touch.
He wasn't greeted by the Thirds on his way into the compound and he was grateful. He nodded to the guard, who gently challenged him for the requisite passwords and he gave them as formally. He was impressed that even in the midst of the Gotei 13 compounds, that regular sentry duties were kept so tightly. He made a mental note to check how good the discipline was of his own sentries.
He knocked lightly on the frame of the sliding door to Ukitake's private quarters, and the deep voice of the captain said, "Come in."
Kira took off his shoes, laid them beside one pair of clogs and one pair of sandals out in the hall, slid aside the door, and stepped in.
He blinked at the riot of pictures that greeted his eyes. An entire wall of the otherwise spare entry way was wallpapered with pictures. Pictures of kids, of men, of women, and groups of people all plastered over every square inch of the opposing wall. As he drew closer, Kira realized that the faces of nearly a tenth of the people in the pictures bore a remarkable resemblance to the Captain of the Thirteenth.
"My family," Ukitake said quietly. "I love the new digital cameras, I can take as many pictures as I want and only print the good ones."
"Which are your parents?" Kira asked, curious.
"Oh... they were reborn to the living world a good thousand years before cameras. These are mostly fifth through twentieth generation relatives and their adopted children." Ukitake laughed, "Sometimes it's hard to keep track."
"Are any of your brothers or sisters still..."
"In Soul Society? I don't think so. I think they all moved on, along with most of their children, grandchildren... and so on."
"That must be lonely, to live so long you've lost everyone you grew up with," Kira said, reliving the pang of losing his own parents.
Ukitake laughed, "Not everyone. I still have Shunsui, Unohana-san, and Yamamoto-sama and a few others that have known me since I was in Academy. It's good to have friends that stick with you."
Kira thought about Shuuhei and Momo and Renji and nodded. "It is good to have friends that stick with you."
"All right. Let's head to the playroom," Ukitake said with a laugh. "I think you may enjoy it."
"Oh gods, how did you get this here?" Kira said, awe clear in his voice as he looked around.
"I didn't. Kisuke-kun did it as a favor to me... uhm... two? No... three centuries ago. He'd made his cave already and I just asked him to make a smaller chamber with three rooms for me." Ukitake stood with his hands on his hips, looking pleased as he looked around.
They had gotten there through a tunnel carved through what looked like solid rock. No sounds were going to escape from this place. The first room they came to was a bedroom. It was simple, stark, with a king-sized bed on a frame with solid, heavy posts and headboard. There were chests of drawers, and other storage furniture all around the walls and Kira found himself curious as to what lay in them.
On the far side of the room were two doors. The first led to a huge bath room, a toilet was set in a closet with a door; but the rest of the room was taken with a sink, a traditional Japanese washing area with a hand wand shower, and then a huge, heated soaking tub, covered with an insulated cover. Steam curled out from under the edges.
"Oh, my, that looks..."
"... decadent, no? I can have the tub filled with healing water from the Infirmary when we need it, but usually, it's just good, hot soaking water." Ukitake sighed. "And the steam helps my lungs, so it serves a double purpose."
The door to the last room was closed and locked. Kira raised an eyebrow when he tried it and found that it would not open. Ukitake shrugged, "That's for some other time, Kira-kun. We need to try what we've agreed upon tonight, first."
"All right," Kira said softly. "What would you like me to do?"
"First, a demonstration." Ukitake went and pulled open a drawer and pulled out a white bundle of soft rope.
"That isn't going to hold me," Kira said quietly.
"It's not supposed to. I would like you to take a length of it and use just your normal strength against it." Ukitake said quietly. "No reiatsu or kidou."
Kira blinked and then complied. He pulled hard at the thick, soft rope and it stretched a little and gave pleasantly; but didn't part.
"Now, with your powers," Ukitake asked.
Kira snapped the rope easily. "Like I said. Gin used steel on me."
"What if I want a bond that you can get out of if you really wanted to?"
"Then... I guess this would be perfect. I can pull against it for the sensation of being held, but if I panicked, it would almost fall off of me," Kira said, thoughtfully.
"Then that it is what we shall do. Now, I have a present for you. May I put it on you?"
Kira blinked, a present? "Sure."
Ukitake pulled a short length of sapphire blue silk cord from his sleeve. There were fasteners on either end that glinted in the light. Ukitake took an end in each hand and then reached up to lay the slick silk against Kira's throat. The cord itself was hard, solid, but sheathed in that silkiness against his skin. Kira tried to swallow the lump that suddenly formed in his throat and at the sudden rush of desire in his loins, as Ukitake fastened the little choker against his throat. It was tight enough Kira could feel it pressing against his skin, but not so tight as to actually restrict his breathing. Again, he could feel his pulse beating against the silken sensation as it had against Ukitake's hands.
"Beautiful," Ukitake said in satisfaction. "It brings the blue out in your eyes even more."
Kira blushed, "Can I... can I take it off when I'm... in public?"
"Oh! Indeed, any time you like. In fact, I'd prefer you only wore it here, when you come to play, if you want to come back." Ukitake said. "But it's yours to keep any way you like, even if you don't come back. I'm just glad it fits so well. Now, if you please, I'd like you to strip." Ukitake turned to the various chests of drawers and started opening a few of them to peer into them and he started pulling things out.
"All the way? Or just down to the loincloth?"
"All the way, please."
"Are you always so polite?" Kira asked.
Ukitake laughed and Kira was relieved as the captain started stripping off his uniform as well with easy, practiced motions and very little self-consciousness. "Yes. Shunsui would say that it's because I have a stick up my ass, but, really, I just find life more pleasant if I am polite. For many, it makes up for my not being particularly obedient."
Kira had to laugh at that and felt so odd doing so. Sex with Gin had never been a laughing matter. It had always been weird battle for attention and against cold rages, never quite knowing when tenderness would turn into torture and vice versa.
Kira looked up from his thoughts to see the white-haired captain standing, naked right in front of him, studying him. The captain carried himself with good balance. His musculature was solid, but as lean as a greyhound. Kira wondered if he could count all the ribs above that nearly concave belly. Kira blushed and glanced up at Ukitake's black eyebrows under that white hair. His pubic hair was as black as his eyebrows, and Kira wondered what had happened to make that distinctive flag of white hair. Ukitake's hips were sharp over legs as hard and lean as the rest of him. All of it covered in that lightly tanned, smooth skin.
"You stand like your grandfather on your father's side," Ukitake said, head tilting a little.
Kira blinked, "You knew my grandfather?"
Ukitake nodded, "And your parents, your grandparents that served, and your three great-grandparents who were in the Fifth, Third, and Eleventh."
"Eleventh!?"
"Before this Kenpachi's time, so a different personality to that Division, then, but, yes, the Eleventh. Your family goes back a long ways in the Gotei 13."
The captain moved in closer to Kira, and then, gradually, Kira felt Ukitake's reiatsu rise. Kira's breathing fluttered.
"Are you all right with this?" Ukitake asked.
"Yes. What are you doing?" Kira's eyes closed as reiatsu rose all around him, tasting of ocean and thunder, waves gradually growing higher. His body shuddered and he felt his cock responding to being lost amid it. Gin's reiatsu had been hot and dry, desert heat rippling around him, almost smothering him. This was cool and crisp, but the feeling of being able to drown amidst it was the same.
"I keep my reiatsu furled during the day, to not inconvenience people. I like to relax that restriction when I want to really concentrate on something else. If the pressure is too much..."
"No... I... you're turning me on," Kira whispered as his knees wobbled.
"Indeed," the deep voice got closer.
Kira leaned towards the sound, and groaned softly as Ukitake stepped in and pressed his lean, hard body all along Kira's. Skin against warm skin and Kira nearly cried out at how good it felt. Arms wrapped around him, and calloused hands stroked all the way down his back from neck to ass. Kira moaned, back arching into the pressure.
"Such beautiful sounds," the whisper breathed softly against his ear. "How did someone so responsive lose the ability to orgasm? Or were you only trying all alone, so no one could see or know?"
Kira flushed bright red, swallowed. "How do you know these things?"
"You told me."
Kira's eyes snapped open in outrage. "I did not... I..." His rage pushed back the weight of the reiatsu around him as he focused on Ukitake's face.
Ukitake's eyes looked... worried? He frowned but watching Kira carefully. "You are still in love with Ichimaru, right?"
Kira swallowed at the sudden turn in conversation. He tentatively shook his head no, but at remembering what he'd said in the restaurant, and at the intensity of the gaze on him, he felt tears well up. "Yes," he whispered.
"And you're still ashamed of that, no?"
"Shouldn't I be? He's... he's a traitor to all the Gotei 13. He made me do something that nearly killed my best friend. I... I wasn't there when they butchered the Central 46 Chambers, but I saw the results and he said to say nothing. I am ashamed of that."
"But that's just what he's done. Not what you loved."
Kira closed his eyes at that and couldn't believe that Ukitake hadn't recoiled from him in horror at what he'd just said. But the warm embrace still surrounded him.
"So it would make sense that you haven't sought out others, to me at least," Ukitake said quietly, one hand just on Kira's hip, the other released Kira's shoulder to slide gently against Kira's jaw. Kira opened his eyes again. "This is a little odd for me, Kira-kun. I can tell that you're attracted to my power and what I have to offer; but I don't usually play with someone that doesn't want me for myself as well."
"Do you want me for myself?" Kira asked softly.
Ukitake leaned his forehead gently against Kira's, and Kira was reminded of when his mother used to take his temperature when she thought he had a cold. It comforted him in a way he hadn't expected. "That's odd, too, as while I know your records, your family, and I have interacted with you, I don't know you well enough to be able to say. At the moment, I'm out of balance on that account as well, as I am as attracted to your need as you are attracted to my power. You are beautiful. You feel wonderful. I'm starting to learn a bit about how you respond and what you like. Maybe that's just where we have to start for you to know what it is that you need to know."
Kira sighed softly, "Maybe."
"Then... hold out your hands, Kira-kun. Let's begin something new for you and me," Ukitake said cheerfully.
Kira held his hands out, and Ukitake deftly looped the soft cotton rope around both wrists, not particularly tightly, but making three wraps around both limbs. Kira frowned, and then nodded when Ukitake then turned the rope so that he could wrap it around the slack between his wrists. He wrapped until both rope 'cuffs' were against Kira's skin, but not tight. Then he tied it off. The remaining end he used to lead Kira over to the huge bed. Kira couldn't help but feel like a puppy being led on a leash.
"Get on, and turn to lie your back."
Kira crawled, a little awkwardly, onto the odd mattress. At first, he'd assumed it was a futon, the surface was flat and it hadn't given immediately with his weight the way a spring box mattress did. There was no bounce or spring to it at all. But when he moved his knees, he found that he'd left impressions on the firm surface. He got to the middle and turned to lie on his back and was startled to find Ukitake almost right next to him. The weird mattress hadn't indicated any motion from another body on the surface. The captain tied his end of the rope to the headboard, so that the rope was well tensioned between Kira and the headboard.
"Pull a little, tell me how it feels."
Kira pulled and shivered at all his muscles tensioning from his hips through his belly and along his chest and arms. "Nice."
Ukitake flashed a smile. "Good." He unfolded a length of silk cloth he'd had bunched in one hand. The cool length of it fell against Kira's skin. Ukitake slid the softness against Kira's throat and Kira was made blazingly aware of the collar he wore. His body tensioned again against his wrist restraints and the combination made Kira shudder.
Ukitake hummed softly, and then wrapped that length of silken cloth around Kira's head and over his eyes. Kira made a small questioning sound, but he didn't unbind himself. He waited for what would happen next. And waited and...
And with his eyes denied him, he realized he could feel Ukitake's reiatsu all around him, that slow surge and pull, that power piled up all around his body, quiescent, sensing, focused on him. The mattress had shaped to his own body, but... it seemed to fall away from him a little more sharply than it should. That's when he realized that he could smell something herbal... piney rosemary and cool sharp mint.
Kira opened his mouth, a trick he'd learned a long time ago when he needed to scent something a little better. The herbal scent came more strongly and Kira wondered if that's what Ukitake's hair would smell like. He smelled just a hint of sweat, of arousal, both his and that of another. He smelled just a hint of Ukitake's breath and realized the warmth by his left ear was likely the captain's face. Ukitake was watching him. He shivered all over.
"Please," he whispered.
"Please what?" The whisper was light against his ear. He turned his head sharply, but touched nothing, no one.
Kira moaned, and he heard that other breathing quicken.
"Please... please touch me," Kira begged.
"Yes." And then those calloused hands stroked down his anchored arms, along his chest, skimming over his nipples and then back up his throat. Kira gasped and arched, disappointed when he couldn't quite seem to meet with the body he felt must be above his. Those hands then moved down his body, along his belly, and then with a gasp of delight from Kira, they stroked his balls, his cock, teasing, pulling gently.
"Mouth." Kira gasped out. "Please... "
A small laugh. "Kiss? Lick? Bite? What?"
Kira made a sound of frustration. "All. Anything... please..." A warm, wet, and rough tongue roughly stirred his scrotum. Kira hummed as he felt Ukitake's mouth close over his sac and balls, but then Kira felt the edge of teeth closing down. He half screamed.
"No!" The teeth let up.
"Rethink that request?" The voice was breathless, and Kira suddenly realized he was affecting Ukitake as well.
"Think?" Kira sobbed out. "How can I think?"
"Exactly."
Kira just wanted to cry. "Fuck this. You're making me think and I can't think and... oh... oh... oh... this... this is why we were supposed to talk this all out in the restaurant. Right?"
"Right."
"Can you just do... do what we agreed on? You do whatever you think you can to... to arouse me and... and maybe I just tell you what feels really good for me?" Kira felt his voice shake, "'Cause I don't think I can tell you everything while... while you're doing it."
"Right. I'm going to take 'yes' as 'yes' and 'no' as 'stop'. Will that work for you?"
"Yes, oh gods, please."
"I don't know if the gods will hear you, but I certainly do."
And a warm, dense body slid onto Kira's, legs against his legs, Ukitake's thickening but still soft cock hanging between Kira's own legs. Kira's cock firmed at that touch of soft skin against that sensitive spot. Arms slid under his shoulders and then a hand slid into his hair, slowly closing. Kira's body tensioned as that hand pulled gradually harder against his hair. Kira whispered, "Oh, yes." The tensioning remained exactly at that level and Kira's breath shuddered through him just as gentle lips teased his own. He pulled against his bound hands, hearing the rope creak.
Kira kissed back, and opened his mouth as Ukitake probed and teased with lips and teeth. Ukitake delved into Kira's mouth with his tongue and Kira moaned into it, his head moving to the grip in his hair. He felt the Ukitake's cock firm, rubbing against the skin between his anus and balls, and his hips moved to gain more friction there and for his own cock, trapped between them.
The hand turned his head to the side, and then Ukitake used lips, tongue, and teeth against the swirls of Kira's ear. Nipping kisses, and then lightly tracing the shell of his ear with the warm, wet tip of his tongue. The licking slid down the tendon alongside his throat, with light nips all the way down. One nip tugged hard on the silk choker, making Kira's breath catch and his cock twitch between them. Then Ukitake's tongue and mouth moved along the pulse of Kira's throat, and when he felt teeth closing against his pulse and breath, Kira's cry was needing, wanting, trembling.
Ukitake's breathing became ragged as well, and Kira felt Ukitake grind hard against his own hard-on. "Yes... oh yes," Kira whispered and felt Ukitake's reiatsu spike at the words, the arousal amid that power even stronger, swirled with a desire that Kira now understood was for him. Just knowing that he was pleasing, arousing the other shinigami made his own arousal all the harder, higher.
Ukitake's mouth and hands moved down, stroking, sliding, kisses and licks down Kira's chest, then onto his nipples. He yelped as the rough wet warmth of Ukitake's tongue slid along his nipples and, surprised by how good that felt, Kira's body arched as Ukitake's mouth closed on a nipple, teeth pinched the bud. The electric intensity of sensation shot right through Kira. "Oh, gods. That's good..."
"You have had that done to you, before, right?" The deep voice was neutral but curious.
"No." Kira said blushing again. "Gin's cut them, but he's never done that."
"Cut..." Kira couldn't see, but he could feel the anger, killing intent suddenly spill, flood all around him. Not at him, he could sense that he wasn't the target of it, but the sheer, heavy weight of it made Kira twist again as it sparked an anger, a rage that he hadn't even realized he'd held. A rage fed by learning more about what it was that he might have had with someone else... that he might, by raw chance and his own stumbling efforts, get another chance at.
"Jyuushiro," Kira said, shivering. "Please continue, sir. I want... want to know more."
He felt Ukitake start at the use of his personal name, the intent lessening and then fading away. "Yes, Izuru."
Jyuushiro took Kira's other nipple into his mouth and somehow sucked in such a way that Kira's nipple felt like it was fluttering, pulled pleasantly at the same time. A silken fall of Jyuushiro's hair slid against Kira's belly, cock, and balls. Kira moaned, pulling at his bindings, body arching again, lost again in the sensation.
As Jyuushiro licked and kissed his way down Kira's belly, the fall of hair moved as well, sliding, soothing, almost tickling. Kira gave a shout when Jyuushiro took the length of Kira's cock deep within his mouth and throat, just swallowing him whole into a wet, warm heat that closed and moved against his length. Kira pumped his hips, and Jyuushiro deftly moved with the motions, bobbing his head, twice. Kira felt the blood pool in his loins, the hard tightness right before orgasm. Kira stuttered, "S... S... Stop!"
Instantly Jyuushiro was off of him, making Kira cry out, bucking involuntarily at the sudden loss of sensation.
"I... I was going to... I was going to come," Kira whispered, oddly thrilled at having the power to stop the man tormenting him so deliciously.
"I thought that was the point of this exercise, Izuru," Jyuushiro breathed against Kira's ear. Kira moaned softly and turned towards the voice and got a kiss that tasted of his own precum.
When Kira caught his breath again, he said, "I... I don't want to without... without having you in me... without you coming with me, too. Please." It came out with more pleading than Kira intended, but he'd had to say it.
"You like anal penetration?" Jyuushiro asked softly.
"With you, yes. Please. I want... I want to give myself to you that way," Kira said back, and at Jyuushiro's spike of arousal, desire, he understood that he'd picked the right thing to say and it warmed him through. That the gift was understood.
"Hm. Okay... then I have one more thing I want to try on you..." Long, lean hands, picked up Kira's knees and Kira eagerly bent himself double.
His hips had always been very flexible, and it was an easy position for him to maintain. He shivered as he felt lips, tongue and teeth moving from the soft flesh under his knee and along the backs and insides of his thighs. Then the sharp drag of nails down soft flesh and he twisted, tensioned. "Oh, yes," he sighed and was rewarded by a quiet groan against his skin.
He felt Jyuushiro's kisses, nuzzles, nips traveling closer and closer to his groin, and then he felt Jyuushiro's tongue slide from his balls down. He cried out, shuddering, arching as the smooth sliding of that wet warmth touched the exquisitely sensitive skin of his anus. Stroking all along that small mouth and then probing, pushing hard at the tight ring of muscles. Kira cried out with each probe, pulling hard at his bindings. He could feel his cock and balls grow heavy with need. Then he sobbed with loss as that sensation ceased.
"Oh, that worked," Jyuushiro said, sounding very satisfied.
Then Kira got to taste the musk of his own anus as Jyuushiro kissed him again, deeply, probing as he'd probed his other mouth. Kira greedily kissed back. The man's weight pushed his legs up against his chest, and he could feel the hardness of the other's cock, the silken soft skin rubbing gently against his ass crack.
Against his mouth, Jyuushiro said softly, "Do you like being lubed inside? Or do you prefer just taking a lubed cock straight?"
"It... it's been a while. I think I'd like a little preparation, please," Kira said back, and stole another kiss before Jyuushiro leaned away again. "I really like how fingers feel."
And in answer a cool, slick, slender finger probed at the tight ring of his anus. Kira tried to relax and suddenly the muscles gave, and he gasped as he was penetrated. The hard slenderness slid into him and turned, crooking to stroke his prostate. Kira shivered, groaned at the feeling, and then twisted as a second finger joined the first. "Yes. Please," he pleaded, and both fingers started to slide in and out as Jyuushiro's other hand started to stroke his cock.
"No, stop," Kira was shocked again to have Jyuushiro stop exactly when asked to, the hand fell away, and the fingers within him stilled. "I'm... I'm too close... please... I think I'd like you in me now."
"As you wish," Jyuushiro said softly. Another click of the lube bottle lid, and then the heated touch of a cock head probed at Kira's anus, and he moaned and tried again, to relax, to let him in. A sensation of stretching, almost too much, almost too big and that hot invasion of his body, sliding surely deep within him. Kira's eyes rolled up in his head under the blindfold, the rope holding his wrists creaked as he pulled hard, his breath came out in a groan, and his hips rolled trying to accept...
Kira was glad that once in, Jyuushiro stilled, trembling. Kira took the moment Jyuushiro gave him to adjust to the penetration, and when he could, he tightened the muscles of his ass and heard the captain gasp, groan softly. The deep impalement made Kira breathe in short, gasping pants. "Good. I'm good, sir. You can... you can move a little now. Short to start, please?"
"Yes," Jyuushiro said breathlessly. Short, slow strokes made both of them groan with each movement. Kira moved his hips for more, and elicited soft cries from his partner and more whimpering cries from himself. The pace picked up, faster, stronger, longer strokes as both of them met the other's motion. Jyuushiro's hand suddenly seized Kira's cock and started pumping with his lube slick hand. Kira cried out, feeling his climax harden, tighten, flutter, and then explode through him.
He screamed when it hit. He felt his own come hit his belly. He heard Jyuushiro cry hard out as well, as his ass grabbed the captain's cock tight with his own orgasm. Then he felt Jyuushiro spasming within him, and he groaned and shuddered as his whole body tightened again. That brought gasps from Jyuushiro as well, and that lean body fell forward against his, sweat and come slick between them.
Hair fell over Kira's face, and he got to smell, first hand, the rosemary and mint of Jyuushiro's hair mixed with the scent that purely Jyuushiro. The captain's arms tightened around him and Kira nuzzled softly against that sweat damped, herbal hair. Both of them were breathing in big, heaving gasps that gradually slowed. Jyuushiro coughed once, but that was all Kira heard.
Both of them groaned a little as Jyuushiro moved so that he could kiss Kira, slow and sensually. They both sighed a little as Jyuushiro slipped from Kira's ass. Then Jyuushiro left him for a moment, and came back with warm, damp clothes and cleaned Kira up, still tied up, still blindfolded. The rubbing felt so good against his skin, Kira almost purred.
Then a sharp snap of kidou and his rope cuffs fell away.
"Don't move, yet, Izuru, let me rub these back to life," Jyuushiro said softly, and Kira whimpered a little as Jyuushiro rubbed the circulation back into his arms. Kira shivered a little, he'd never been taken care of like this, after. Cleaned and released whole, it was something he'd never had before.
Gentle hands stroked the cloth away from his eyes, and he got to see Jyuushiro's concerned face looking at him. Kira's breath caught again at the attention in those eyes, the intent gaze directed solely at and for him.
"You all right?" Jyuushiro asked.
"Yes," Kira said, truthfully. "I am."
Jyuushiro smiled, "Then get off the covers, I want to get under the blankets with you."
Kira groaned at having to move, but he did; and was rewarded by getting pulled up against the warm, lean length of Jyuushiro as they both were covered by smooth sheets and thick blankets. Jyuushiro gently stroked Kira's skin.
"Well, Izuru, what do you think?"
"Think? You want me to think again?" Kira said and the laughter in his hair made him blush with happiness this time.
"Mmmhm... Did we do what you wanted to do? We can do a more detailed post-mortem when we have our brains, but I'd like to know that, at least."
Kira leaned quietly against Jyuushiro's chest, hearing the steady heartbeat, the slightly rasping breath. He wondered if he'd pushed the captain too hard for his breathing to sound like that. "We didn't."
"No? What did we miss?"
Kira thought a bit about how to say it. He fingered his choker and shivered a little. "The terror. My fear. All the things I was so afraid of when I talked with you. We didn't touch any of it."
Jyuushiro squeezed him gently. "Sorry." There was laughter in that deep voice in the dark.
Kira chuckled as well. "I'm not. Not really. Thank you, Jyuushiro, for what you did give me, it was something I couldn't want because I didn't think it was possible. I couldn't even really wish for it because it seemed too insane. Thank you. And..."
"And?"
Kira said, slowly, "And I think I'd like to come back, sometime. Even if you do have to torture me again just to figure out what I want."
And Kira was rewarded with rich, rolling laughter. "Any time, Izuru. Any time."
But then the modern Ukitake in my brain wouldn't lay a finger on Kira until he'd really talked and negotiated what he needed to negotiate. Which is why this monster is as huge as it is. Sorry.
This takes place after calmingeffects's Gin/Kira series. You don't have to read it before reading this. There is, amusingly enough, actually a piece that I've already written that comes before this as well; but I'll be posting it in June for the springkink community. I'll probably put it in my fic list in the right order.
Title: Strange Tortures
Fandom: Bleach
For: calmingeffects through chat_exchange
Pairing: Ukitake/Kira
Prompt: "Strange Torture"
Word Count: 8508 (I did say it was a monster)
Rating: NC-17
Warnings: A little bondage, explicit sex between two men, and lots of talking about BDSM. Sorry.
Summary: Kira hears rumors about Ukitake-taichou and goes to him because of them so he can scratch an itch left by Gin.
Disclaimer: I don't own or make money off of Bleach. It's all fictional. Really. And all characters having sex are consenting adults.
This was not beta'ed, so all the mistakes are mine.
Kira Izuru found himself shaking as he entered the compound for the Thirteenth Division. He knew he was here for a reason, but it seemed like such a stupid reason the more he turned it over in his mind. What did little Hanatarou know about these things? How could he trust a taichou? He had trusted Gin with everything he was, and from that trust Kira had betrayed himself, his friends, and the whole of the Gotei 13.
And with troubles like that, why was he so worried about something as trivial or stupid as sex?
Kira stopped outside the doorway into the compound.
Suddenly, there were two bursts of reiatsu and two figures dropped to one knee on either side of him. Kira felt the rock hard reiatsu of Sentarou and the new growth flexible reiatsu of Kiyone splash down next to him.
"Kira-fukutaichou!"
"Kira-fukutaichou!"
"I welcome you to the Thirteenth, how may I serve you?" Sentaruo said gruffly.
"No! Let me help you? What do you need? A coordinated training exercise? Some help with paperwork?" Kiyone asked, near pleading.
Kira eyed the two Third Seats. Some part of him cynically commented that these two were a master's wet dream. Do anything you wanted, huh?
In the back of his head Wabisuki stirred. But look at them. They are not humbled the way you were. See their pride, their arrogance?
Kira blinked as the two Thirds started squabbling over which of them would help him out the best. They certainly weren't like him. They had no trace of being cowed, of being... forced to guess correctly exactly what the object of their entreaties needed. They were both throwing out ideas like a fountain, showing off everything they could think of, testing those ideas against each other. And they had no fear of what it was he wanted or of getting it wrong.
Kira frowned a little over what that implied of their captain. When they both cried out at the frown and came up with more ridiculous ideas, he interrupted them. "I need to see Ukitake-taichou, if it's okay. I didn't know his schedule..."
"You should have made an appointment!" Kiyone cried. "Then you would have known..."
"Stupid! It's obvious he happened to come by on some other errand and just wanted to drop in and see him!" Sentarou yelled.
Kira was taken aback a bit by that. "But... is he..."
"Ukitake-san's just doing paperwork. He likes getting interrupted then," Kiyone said, comfortingly. "It's okay. I'll show you the way."
"No! I'll show him the way!"
The two of them elbowed each other on the way to Ukitake-taichou's office, and both of them knocked to announce him. From outside the office, Kira felt the sea calm depth of Ukitake-taichou's reiatsu. Breathless with suppressed anxiety, Kira stumbled into the office, into the depths of a power so alike and so different from Ichimaru's, only to see Ukitake-taichou with his brush in hand, poised over paper, and one eyebrow cocked in surprise.
"Ah. Good... uhm... is it morning or afternoon, Kotsubaki?" Ukitake asked, blinking owlishly.
Kira jolted at Ukitake addressing his subordinate by family name and without a honorific, respectful familiarity.
"Morning, sir!" Sentarou answered easily.
"Ah. Good morning, Kira-fukutaichou, how may I be of assistance?"
Kira looked at the mild-mannered, open face before him and just couldn't, for the life of him, think of the man in front of him as a sadist. It was just... wrong. Hanatarou had to be mistaken. Or maybe Kira had remembered it wrongly. He'd been half-faint with blood-loss and pain, he must have fucked it up. His hope was just an illusion, a mad dream, impossible.
Kira shook his head, and his voice betrayed him and broke when he said, "I... I'm... I'm sorry... I think I must have been mistaken." He turned to go.
"About what?" Ukitake-taichou asked.
"Nu... Nothing. I'm sorry to have bothered you, sir." Kira felt faint as he turned away.
"Kira. Stay."
Kira's eyes closed. He stopped, a shiver worked from his head to his toes at that deep voice suddenly sharpened to command.
"Thirds. Go." Two puffs of flash step and the Third Seats were gone.
There was a swirl in that ocean of power, and then a small sigh, "They are truly gone. And you. You're not walking out that door with that wild mix of fear, arousal, and disappointment without at least saying something as to why."
"Something," Kira said and waited. The center of all that power walked up to him. He cringed, expecting to get hit for his presumption.
He opened his eyes when he heard a small puff of laughter. "I guess I asked for that."
Mild-mannered eyes looked at him. "You... you're not a sadist are you?" Kira blurted out.
Ukitake blinked.
"You didn't hit me for... for giving you lip," Kira explained.
Ukitake surprised the hell out of Kira by laughing. "No. I like humor. As to the other question... I am a sadist. I have just a little masochism. I switch between top and bottom. I can be a dominant, but it's harder for me outside of the chain of command. I cannot submit, and I'm definitely not a master or slave."
"Those are all different?" Kira asked, bemused.
"You don't know that?" Ukitake's brown eyes looked concerned. "Then we do need to talk. What kind of food do you like? And is it even close to lunch time?"
"You lost track of the time?"
Ukitake looked sheepish, "I was writing. I don't really notice the time when I'm writing."
"What were you writing?"
"A story about a flower that talked with a bug and how the bug goes off to see things to tell the flower. It's a kids' book. One of my great-great-grand-something-nephews worked out the plot with me and he's doing the pictures."
Kira put his head in his hands. "A sadist that writes kids' books."
Ukitake laughed. "I told you I liked humor."
"It is lunch time. I like... anything..." Kira said, distracted.
"No preferences at all? Even between Western food and Japanese food?"
"None. You pick."
Ukitake shook his head, "This does not bode well."
But before Kira could ask what he meant by that, Ukitake-taicho took off his captain's haori and hung it up by the door. "I think I'm off official duties now. Let's go."
They ended up at a little teriyaki place nearly on the opposite side of Seireitei. It was crowded, with plenty of tables and lots of people working their way through what smelled like really excellent food. The decorations were colorful and well done, the chef staff yelled their greeting with gusto, and within thirty seconds of a customer leaving their table, the table was sparkling clean and ready for them.
Kira noted that, somehow, Ukitake had wrapped his reiatsu around himself, minimizing his impact on the souls around them. He'd never seen Ichimaru do that, or most of the other Captains, they'd always seemed to enjoy making weaker souls tremble or fall over when they were near. Kira frowned and tried to draw his own reiatsu in and got a glance from Ukitake and a small nod.
Kira sat opposite Ukitake and looked around with wonder. "We're going to talk about... that, here?"
Ukitake studied his menu, "After we order."
"But there's... people here. They'll hear us." Kira said, worried.
"Hm. How often do you hear the whole of a conversation when people are talking at a normal tone, when that lady is telling her girlfriends about how badly her beautician messed up her hair last week?" Ukitake tilted his head in the direction of the very loud, very animated woman gesturing with beautifully painted nails.
"Oh," Kira digested that while staring blankly at his menu.
The waitress came up, "Hey, what can I getcha?"
"Uhm.. I'd like a short rib lunch and one of the beef and chicken combinations, please, and some tea," Ukitake said.
"Both meals?" The waitress looked him up and down. "You do not look like you could even fit that in your skinny bod, honey. But it's your dime." She wrote in her pad while Kira choked over his ice water. "What about you, pretty boy?" Kira saw Ukitake bite his lip.
Kira flushed, "Uhm... just the chicken teriyaki, please, and uhm... hot water?"
"Plain jane boy, hm? Okay, not even a bit of spice for your meal?" The waitress grinned and winked at Kira making him blush even harder. "Oh, that's nice," she said. "All right... I'll let you be." She sauntered off.
"What a..." Kira said.
"... nice woman." Ukitake finished. "She was just teasing. I'll have to tell Shunsui about this place. And you are quite pretty."
Kira gaped at Ukitake, who frowned and studied Kira closely.
"How is it that you don't know what a sadist is, and still knew enough to ask me if I am one?" Ukitake asked in a tone that, for Kira, was far too even for the content of the sentence. "And don't tell me it was just a passing fancy and you wandered in off the street on a whim and blurted that out by mistake. You're here."
Kira bit his tongue, and felt his face heat even more than when the waitress spoke to him. "How can you read my mind?"
"I can't. That is why we're talking in a public place. I can read your reiatsu for general emotional content and level of agitation. For most folks it gets stronger the more emotionally upset or focused they are. You are not focused." Ukitake said patiently. "Now. Why. Are. You. Here."
Kira felt pinned by that calm brown gaze. "Yamamoto Hanatarou gave me your name."
Ukitake blinked. "Who?"
"The... uhm... the Seventh Seat of the Fourth Division? He's a little guy, straight black hair..."
"Oh! Right. He's good, but I can't ever remember his name. And he's helped me out... I'm glad he remembered to..." Ukitake frowned.
Kira squirmed in his seat. "Can you please finish a sentence, sir?"
Ukitake grinned. "Sorry. I'm too used to talking with Shunsui. So. Would you like to know the differences in behaviors between sadists, dominants, tops, and masters?"
"Uhm... yes?" Kira wasn't sure if he cared, really, but it was obvious Ukitake wanted to explain things.
Ukitake bared his teeth in something that Kira could not call a smile. "Or do you really not care what you're getting into if you agree to do something with me?"
Kira felt his own anger flare. "Does it really matter? Isn't it all just I agree to go with you and you do what you want with me? Why do we have to talk about it? And why here?"
"Because the food is good?" The waitress said as she stepped in with their food and Kira nearly jumped out of his seat.
"Exactly," Ukitake said smoothly. "The food is excellent."
The waitress deposited all their food neatly and exactly and gave Ukitake a smile and Kira a raised eyebrow, and then went on her way.
"So... why here?" Kira persisted. "It seems stupid, why not just lock ourselves in a bedroom and talk about what we want to do there?"
Ukitake snapped apart his chopsticks and happily breathed the steam off his food. "Well, the food here is good." Kira snorted and Ukitake looked up at him. "Besides that, in a public space I cannot physically coerce you. I cannot intimidate you in this setting. And both of us must behave within socially delimited parameters. For instance, you can't strip naked and try to seduce me into doing something I'd regret, and vice versa. There can be no threats that do not have other consequences in this situation. In a private setting... " Ukitake shrugged. "Given how you came to me, I'm sure you know what can happen in a private setting."
Kira paled. How Ukitake had gotten that from just the fact that Hanatarou had sent him made Kira dizzy to think though.
"What... what if I don't want to do this? What if I just leave?" Kira said, shakily.
"Then I'll pay for our lunches and I might have some leftovers for dinner. Though... I am rather hungry," Ukitake said peacefully after swallowing his mouthful.
"And... and you'll tell everyone I came to you for pain," Kira said bitterly.
Ukitake paused. "Wherever did you get that idea? I'm fairly sure the only name you were given was my own, no?"
Reluctantly, Kira nodded his head.
"I have the Fourth Division give my name and my name only. There are people who need to know that they're not alone," Ukitake said with a sigh. "That does not mean that anyone else's confidentiality is ever broken by me."
Kira thought and started on his food while Ukitake ate his first meal almost without breathing.
Ukitake sighed in satisfaction from the first meal and mournfully looked at his second. "Ah well, first the bulk of what I'd like you to know. The differences, short and succinct. Sadists like to give pain. I, in particular, only like giving pain to someone that really wants it, needs it, likes it, i.e. usually a clear masochist. Tops like to do things to a bottom that the bottom wants. A dominant likes to have control over their submissive, usually involving orders and punishment if the submissive doesn't do as ordered. With some pairings the punishment is actually the fun part of it. With masters and slaves, there is also a level of behavior correcting punishment, where what is done is something the slave would by all means otherwise avoid. You should note, however, that these are my distinctions, and if you do get involved with someone else, you need to ask what their labels mean." Ukitake ticked through all the points on his four fingers. "Any questions?"
Kira thought through one slow mouthful of chicken and rice. "Does that mean that a Sadist isn't always on top?"
"Sadists usually are the ones doing, so... it's rather hard to bottom and be sadistic at the same time, but I've seen it done. I've seen a dominant order her submissive to flog her, and it was amazing." Ukitake said, reflecting.
They ate for a while in silence as Kira processed the information he'd been given.
"So, Kira-kun, what do you now make of the answer I gave you? Would you please explain what your understanding of me now is?"
Kira wracked his brain. "Uhm... the first thing was what you just said... that you like to give pain, but only to people that get off on it. Uhm... you'll give or take other things? You can give orders, but don't... uhm... take them well, and you're just right out of the whole behavior correcting business.... Is... is that it?"
"And... sometimes I can get off on a little pain, applied the right ways," Ukitake said. "Well done. I'm impressed you remembered so much of it when you didn't even know what the terms meant."
Kira smiled tentatively.
"Now, how would you describe yourself?"
Kira blinked and quirked a very crooked grin, "I've been Gin's slave."
Ukitake rocked back, eyes hooding for just a moment. "Bravely said, Kira-kun. Now... what do you want?"
"You just said you aren't a master... so... I guess I don't want..."
"No." Jyuushiro's deep voice stopped Kira's voice. "Do not shape your desires from mine. You must define your own desires."
Kira realized his hands were shaking. He whispered, "I want Gin back."
The brown eyes watched him, listening. When the white-haired captain said nothing at all, Kira shivered all the harder and thought frantically.
"I... I don't... I don't get what all this has to do with... with me. What does what I want have to do with anything? Why... why can't you just..."
"Because in order for me to really enjoy whatever it is that we do, I need to understand that you will enjoy it. Derive joy from it. And I cannot read your mind, Kira-kun. It is much easier if you can tell me." Ukitake brooded a moment, and then reached for his short ribs, giving Kira time to think.
Joy? Joy from any of this? Kira was frightened, more than anything. But the dark desires of his previous captain had imprinted themselves upon his nerves and body. Even pain from the innocent and hapless Hanatarou had aroused Kira embarrassingly. Kira hadn't even been able to masturbate without resorting to self-inflicted damage, and he was so tired of that. Suddenly realizing that, Kira finally found he could talk about it.
"I'm not sure if those things can describe what I want. I... I'm having trouble..." Kira cursed his complexion as he felt himself heat with a blush. But the obvious patience in the man opposite him was a quiet encouragement he hadn't expected. "I seem to need pain or threat in order to orgasm."
"What level of pain or threat?" Ukitake asked.
"Cuts, long slashes, or... or choking..." Kira frowned rather than cry. "I... I wish I didn't need those. But... I guess that makes me a masochist, huh?"
Ukitake nodded solemnly. "A heavy play masochist at that. Hm... asphyxiation, hard to time, but easier on higher level shinigami. We're damned hard to kill."
Kira blinked. "You've done that?"
Ukitake shrugged. "There is very little I haven't done in two thousand years. Go on, please."
"Uhm... okay. I guess I'm a bottom, I like things done to me. I haven't... done things to other people... I don’t like hurting anyone. But I don't know what it would be like to have someone that liked it. I don't ever want to go through a master and slave relationship again, but... it's familiar to me, I think. I miss... some parts of it."
"What parts?" Ukitake gently prodded.
Kira huffed softly, "There were times... when I was just chained and relieved of... well... everything. I didn't have anything I could do, anything to decide, so I just... well... was. I don't know if that makes any sense."
Ukitake nodded. "That makes sense to me."
Kira sagged a little in relief. "You have no idea what it means to me to know I'm not... not crazy or something. Alone in all this."
Ukitake quirked a grin. "Good then. I have one more question. Is there anything you wish to never do or have done to you?"
Kira played with his chopsticks as he thought about that question. "I... I don't like... I don't like broken bones, broken noses, or dislocations. Marks on my face are so hard to explain."
Ukitake winced and Kira blushed quietly.
"I... I don't like it when someone really hurts me for getting things wrong. I don't... don't like... being ashamed all the time." Kira felt like the last was dragged out of him by Ukitake's look of sympathy.
Ukitake nodded, "I can't do humiliation or shame. So... that will be easy enough. I don't do any human wastes or cross-dressing. I don't usually do anything having to do with blood. I have a system for cleaning it up, but it's a lot of effort."
Kira blinked, "People play with human wastes for fun?"
Ukitake shrugged, "Yes, but not me."
"Oh, good." Then Kira absorbed the other. "You... you don't spill blood?"
Ukitake shook his head slowly. "Not without precautions and a lot of prep work and a real understanding of what the benefit to my partner is."
"Then I don't know if this is going to work," Kira said quietly, hearing only that Ukitake wouldn't cut him. "I've gone through this whole torturous conversation for no reason at all."
"Hm. Conversation as torture." Ukitake chuckled quietly. "Give me one chance, Kira-kun. I think I can make this conversation worth your while. From what you've said, your real wish is to figure out if you can be aroused by something other than cuts or blood and being choked. I think I can address that wish."
Kira's eyes widened. After all the things they'd talked about... this man had latched onto an offhand comment made from despair. And it was the one thing he hadn't thought possible.
"Can you come to my quarters tonight, Kira-kun?" Ukitake asked.
"At the Thirteenth Division?" Kira asked, recalling the paper walls of the officers quarters in the Third.
"Yes. Tonight at 7," Ukitake said, watching Kira carefully.
Kira nodded, "It can't hurt to try, can it?"
Ukitake laughed, "Ignoring the double entendre, no. It can't hurt for us to try."
Kira arrived promptly at 7.
When they'd left the restaurant, Ukitake had asked his permission to touch him on his throat. Kira had consented. The white-haired captain then shocked Kira by wrapping his slender hands firmly about Kira's throat. There hadn't been enough pressure to cut off his breath, but he'd felt his pulse pounding against those slender, calloused hands. The captain had studied his hands, muttered, nodded to himself, and then bowed himself off to his offices.
Kira had been half-aroused the rest of the afternoon simply from remembering that firm, warm, sudden touch.
He wasn't greeted by the Thirds on his way into the compound and he was grateful. He nodded to the guard, who gently challenged him for the requisite passwords and he gave them as formally. He was impressed that even in the midst of the Gotei 13 compounds, that regular sentry duties were kept so tightly. He made a mental note to check how good the discipline was of his own sentries.
He knocked lightly on the frame of the sliding door to Ukitake's private quarters, and the deep voice of the captain said, "Come in."
Kira took off his shoes, laid them beside one pair of clogs and one pair of sandals out in the hall, slid aside the door, and stepped in.
He blinked at the riot of pictures that greeted his eyes. An entire wall of the otherwise spare entry way was wallpapered with pictures. Pictures of kids, of men, of women, and groups of people all plastered over every square inch of the opposing wall. As he drew closer, Kira realized that the faces of nearly a tenth of the people in the pictures bore a remarkable resemblance to the Captain of the Thirteenth.
"My family," Ukitake said quietly. "I love the new digital cameras, I can take as many pictures as I want and only print the good ones."
"Which are your parents?" Kira asked, curious.
"Oh... they were reborn to the living world a good thousand years before cameras. These are mostly fifth through twentieth generation relatives and their adopted children." Ukitake laughed, "Sometimes it's hard to keep track."
"Are any of your brothers or sisters still..."
"In Soul Society? I don't think so. I think they all moved on, along with most of their children, grandchildren... and so on."
"That must be lonely, to live so long you've lost everyone you grew up with," Kira said, reliving the pang of losing his own parents.
Ukitake laughed, "Not everyone. I still have Shunsui, Unohana-san, and Yamamoto-sama and a few others that have known me since I was in Academy. It's good to have friends that stick with you."
Kira thought about Shuuhei and Momo and Renji and nodded. "It is good to have friends that stick with you."
"All right. Let's head to the playroom," Ukitake said with a laugh. "I think you may enjoy it."
"Oh gods, how did you get this here?" Kira said, awe clear in his voice as he looked around.
"I didn't. Kisuke-kun did it as a favor to me... uhm... two? No... three centuries ago. He'd made his cave already and I just asked him to make a smaller chamber with three rooms for me." Ukitake stood with his hands on his hips, looking pleased as he looked around.
They had gotten there through a tunnel carved through what looked like solid rock. No sounds were going to escape from this place. The first room they came to was a bedroom. It was simple, stark, with a king-sized bed on a frame with solid, heavy posts and headboard. There were chests of drawers, and other storage furniture all around the walls and Kira found himself curious as to what lay in them.
On the far side of the room were two doors. The first led to a huge bath room, a toilet was set in a closet with a door; but the rest of the room was taken with a sink, a traditional Japanese washing area with a hand wand shower, and then a huge, heated soaking tub, covered with an insulated cover. Steam curled out from under the edges.
"Oh, my, that looks..."
"... decadent, no? I can have the tub filled with healing water from the Infirmary when we need it, but usually, it's just good, hot soaking water." Ukitake sighed. "And the steam helps my lungs, so it serves a double purpose."
The door to the last room was closed and locked. Kira raised an eyebrow when he tried it and found that it would not open. Ukitake shrugged, "That's for some other time, Kira-kun. We need to try what we've agreed upon tonight, first."
"All right," Kira said softly. "What would you like me to do?"
"First, a demonstration." Ukitake went and pulled open a drawer and pulled out a white bundle of soft rope.
"That isn't going to hold me," Kira said quietly.
"It's not supposed to. I would like you to take a length of it and use just your normal strength against it." Ukitake said quietly. "No reiatsu or kidou."
Kira blinked and then complied. He pulled hard at the thick, soft rope and it stretched a little and gave pleasantly; but didn't part.
"Now, with your powers," Ukitake asked.
Kira snapped the rope easily. "Like I said. Gin used steel on me."
"What if I want a bond that you can get out of if you really wanted to?"
"Then... I guess this would be perfect. I can pull against it for the sensation of being held, but if I panicked, it would almost fall off of me," Kira said, thoughtfully.
"Then that it is what we shall do. Now, I have a present for you. May I put it on you?"
Kira blinked, a present? "Sure."
Ukitake pulled a short length of sapphire blue silk cord from his sleeve. There were fasteners on either end that glinted in the light. Ukitake took an end in each hand and then reached up to lay the slick silk against Kira's throat. The cord itself was hard, solid, but sheathed in that silkiness against his skin. Kira tried to swallow the lump that suddenly formed in his throat and at the sudden rush of desire in his loins, as Ukitake fastened the little choker against his throat. It was tight enough Kira could feel it pressing against his skin, but not so tight as to actually restrict his breathing. Again, he could feel his pulse beating against the silken sensation as it had against Ukitake's hands.
"Beautiful," Ukitake said in satisfaction. "It brings the blue out in your eyes even more."
Kira blushed, "Can I... can I take it off when I'm... in public?"
"Oh! Indeed, any time you like. In fact, I'd prefer you only wore it here, when you come to play, if you want to come back." Ukitake said. "But it's yours to keep any way you like, even if you don't come back. I'm just glad it fits so well. Now, if you please, I'd like you to strip." Ukitake turned to the various chests of drawers and started opening a few of them to peer into them and he started pulling things out.
"All the way? Or just down to the loincloth?"
"All the way, please."
"Are you always so polite?" Kira asked.
Ukitake laughed and Kira was relieved as the captain started stripping off his uniform as well with easy, practiced motions and very little self-consciousness. "Yes. Shunsui would say that it's because I have a stick up my ass, but, really, I just find life more pleasant if I am polite. For many, it makes up for my not being particularly obedient."
Kira had to laugh at that and felt so odd doing so. Sex with Gin had never been a laughing matter. It had always been weird battle for attention and against cold rages, never quite knowing when tenderness would turn into torture and vice versa.
Kira looked up from his thoughts to see the white-haired captain standing, naked right in front of him, studying him. The captain carried himself with good balance. His musculature was solid, but as lean as a greyhound. Kira wondered if he could count all the ribs above that nearly concave belly. Kira blushed and glanced up at Ukitake's black eyebrows under that white hair. His pubic hair was as black as his eyebrows, and Kira wondered what had happened to make that distinctive flag of white hair. Ukitake's hips were sharp over legs as hard and lean as the rest of him. All of it covered in that lightly tanned, smooth skin.
"You stand like your grandfather on your father's side," Ukitake said, head tilting a little.
Kira blinked, "You knew my grandfather?"
Ukitake nodded, "And your parents, your grandparents that served, and your three great-grandparents who were in the Fifth, Third, and Eleventh."
"Eleventh!?"
"Before this Kenpachi's time, so a different personality to that Division, then, but, yes, the Eleventh. Your family goes back a long ways in the Gotei 13."
The captain moved in closer to Kira, and then, gradually, Kira felt Ukitake's reiatsu rise. Kira's breathing fluttered.
"Are you all right with this?" Ukitake asked.
"Yes. What are you doing?" Kira's eyes closed as reiatsu rose all around him, tasting of ocean and thunder, waves gradually growing higher. His body shuddered and he felt his cock responding to being lost amid it. Gin's reiatsu had been hot and dry, desert heat rippling around him, almost smothering him. This was cool and crisp, but the feeling of being able to drown amidst it was the same.
"I keep my reiatsu furled during the day, to not inconvenience people. I like to relax that restriction when I want to really concentrate on something else. If the pressure is too much..."
"No... I... you're turning me on," Kira whispered as his knees wobbled.
"Indeed," the deep voice got closer.
Kira leaned towards the sound, and groaned softly as Ukitake stepped in and pressed his lean, hard body all along Kira's. Skin against warm skin and Kira nearly cried out at how good it felt. Arms wrapped around him, and calloused hands stroked all the way down his back from neck to ass. Kira moaned, back arching into the pressure.
"Such beautiful sounds," the whisper breathed softly against his ear. "How did someone so responsive lose the ability to orgasm? Or were you only trying all alone, so no one could see or know?"
Kira flushed bright red, swallowed. "How do you know these things?"
"You told me."
Kira's eyes snapped open in outrage. "I did not... I..." His rage pushed back the weight of the reiatsu around him as he focused on Ukitake's face.
Ukitake's eyes looked... worried? He frowned but watching Kira carefully. "You are still in love with Ichimaru, right?"
Kira swallowed at the sudden turn in conversation. He tentatively shook his head no, but at remembering what he'd said in the restaurant, and at the intensity of the gaze on him, he felt tears well up. "Yes," he whispered.
"And you're still ashamed of that, no?"
"Shouldn't I be? He's... he's a traitor to all the Gotei 13. He made me do something that nearly killed my best friend. I... I wasn't there when they butchered the Central 46 Chambers, but I saw the results and he said to say nothing. I am ashamed of that."
"But that's just what he's done. Not what you loved."
Kira closed his eyes at that and couldn't believe that Ukitake hadn't recoiled from him in horror at what he'd just said. But the warm embrace still surrounded him.
"So it would make sense that you haven't sought out others, to me at least," Ukitake said quietly, one hand just on Kira's hip, the other released Kira's shoulder to slide gently against Kira's jaw. Kira opened his eyes again. "This is a little odd for me, Kira-kun. I can tell that you're attracted to my power and what I have to offer; but I don't usually play with someone that doesn't want me for myself as well."
"Do you want me for myself?" Kira asked softly.
Ukitake leaned his forehead gently against Kira's, and Kira was reminded of when his mother used to take his temperature when she thought he had a cold. It comforted him in a way he hadn't expected. "That's odd, too, as while I know your records, your family, and I have interacted with you, I don't know you well enough to be able to say. At the moment, I'm out of balance on that account as well, as I am as attracted to your need as you are attracted to my power. You are beautiful. You feel wonderful. I'm starting to learn a bit about how you respond and what you like. Maybe that's just where we have to start for you to know what it is that you need to know."
Kira sighed softly, "Maybe."
"Then... hold out your hands, Kira-kun. Let's begin something new for you and me," Ukitake said cheerfully.
Kira held his hands out, and Ukitake deftly looped the soft cotton rope around both wrists, not particularly tightly, but making three wraps around both limbs. Kira frowned, and then nodded when Ukitake then turned the rope so that he could wrap it around the slack between his wrists. He wrapped until both rope 'cuffs' were against Kira's skin, but not tight. Then he tied it off. The remaining end he used to lead Kira over to the huge bed. Kira couldn't help but feel like a puppy being led on a leash.
"Get on, and turn to lie your back."
Kira crawled, a little awkwardly, onto the odd mattress. At first, he'd assumed it was a futon, the surface was flat and it hadn't given immediately with his weight the way a spring box mattress did. There was no bounce or spring to it at all. But when he moved his knees, he found that he'd left impressions on the firm surface. He got to the middle and turned to lie on his back and was startled to find Ukitake almost right next to him. The weird mattress hadn't indicated any motion from another body on the surface. The captain tied his end of the rope to the headboard, so that the rope was well tensioned between Kira and the headboard.
"Pull a little, tell me how it feels."
Kira pulled and shivered at all his muscles tensioning from his hips through his belly and along his chest and arms. "Nice."
Ukitake flashed a smile. "Good." He unfolded a length of silk cloth he'd had bunched in one hand. The cool length of it fell against Kira's skin. Ukitake slid the softness against Kira's throat and Kira was made blazingly aware of the collar he wore. His body tensioned again against his wrist restraints and the combination made Kira shudder.
Ukitake hummed softly, and then wrapped that length of silken cloth around Kira's head and over his eyes. Kira made a small questioning sound, but he didn't unbind himself. He waited for what would happen next. And waited and...
And with his eyes denied him, he realized he could feel Ukitake's reiatsu all around him, that slow surge and pull, that power piled up all around his body, quiescent, sensing, focused on him. The mattress had shaped to his own body, but... it seemed to fall away from him a little more sharply than it should. That's when he realized that he could smell something herbal... piney rosemary and cool sharp mint.
Kira opened his mouth, a trick he'd learned a long time ago when he needed to scent something a little better. The herbal scent came more strongly and Kira wondered if that's what Ukitake's hair would smell like. He smelled just a hint of sweat, of arousal, both his and that of another. He smelled just a hint of Ukitake's breath and realized the warmth by his left ear was likely the captain's face. Ukitake was watching him. He shivered all over.
"Please," he whispered.
"Please what?" The whisper was light against his ear. He turned his head sharply, but touched nothing, no one.
Kira moaned, and he heard that other breathing quicken.
"Please... please touch me," Kira begged.
"Yes." And then those calloused hands stroked down his anchored arms, along his chest, skimming over his nipples and then back up his throat. Kira gasped and arched, disappointed when he couldn't quite seem to meet with the body he felt must be above his. Those hands then moved down his body, along his belly, and then with a gasp of delight from Kira, they stroked his balls, his cock, teasing, pulling gently.
"Mouth." Kira gasped out. "Please... "
A small laugh. "Kiss? Lick? Bite? What?"
Kira made a sound of frustration. "All. Anything... please..." A warm, wet, and rough tongue roughly stirred his scrotum. Kira hummed as he felt Ukitake's mouth close over his sac and balls, but then Kira felt the edge of teeth closing down. He half screamed.
"No!" The teeth let up.
"Rethink that request?" The voice was breathless, and Kira suddenly realized he was affecting Ukitake as well.
"Think?" Kira sobbed out. "How can I think?"
"Exactly."
Kira just wanted to cry. "Fuck this. You're making me think and I can't think and... oh... oh... oh... this... this is why we were supposed to talk this all out in the restaurant. Right?"
"Right."
"Can you just do... do what we agreed on? You do whatever you think you can to... to arouse me and... and maybe I just tell you what feels really good for me?" Kira felt his voice shake, "'Cause I don't think I can tell you everything while... while you're doing it."
"Right. I'm going to take 'yes' as 'yes' and 'no' as 'stop'. Will that work for you?"
"Yes, oh gods, please."
"I don't know if the gods will hear you, but I certainly do."
And a warm, dense body slid onto Kira's, legs against his legs, Ukitake's thickening but still soft cock hanging between Kira's own legs. Kira's cock firmed at that touch of soft skin against that sensitive spot. Arms slid under his shoulders and then a hand slid into his hair, slowly closing. Kira's body tensioned as that hand pulled gradually harder against his hair. Kira whispered, "Oh, yes." The tensioning remained exactly at that level and Kira's breath shuddered through him just as gentle lips teased his own. He pulled against his bound hands, hearing the rope creak.
Kira kissed back, and opened his mouth as Ukitake probed and teased with lips and teeth. Ukitake delved into Kira's mouth with his tongue and Kira moaned into it, his head moving to the grip in his hair. He felt the Ukitake's cock firm, rubbing against the skin between his anus and balls, and his hips moved to gain more friction there and for his own cock, trapped between them.
The hand turned his head to the side, and then Ukitake used lips, tongue, and teeth against the swirls of Kira's ear. Nipping kisses, and then lightly tracing the shell of his ear with the warm, wet tip of his tongue. The licking slid down the tendon alongside his throat, with light nips all the way down. One nip tugged hard on the silk choker, making Kira's breath catch and his cock twitch between them. Then Ukitake's tongue and mouth moved along the pulse of Kira's throat, and when he felt teeth closing against his pulse and breath, Kira's cry was needing, wanting, trembling.
Ukitake's breathing became ragged as well, and Kira felt Ukitake grind hard against his own hard-on. "Yes... oh yes," Kira whispered and felt Ukitake's reiatsu spike at the words, the arousal amid that power even stronger, swirled with a desire that Kira now understood was for him. Just knowing that he was pleasing, arousing the other shinigami made his own arousal all the harder, higher.
Ukitake's mouth and hands moved down, stroking, sliding, kisses and licks down Kira's chest, then onto his nipples. He yelped as the rough wet warmth of Ukitake's tongue slid along his nipples and, surprised by how good that felt, Kira's body arched as Ukitake's mouth closed on a nipple, teeth pinched the bud. The electric intensity of sensation shot right through Kira. "Oh, gods. That's good..."
"You have had that done to you, before, right?" The deep voice was neutral but curious.
"No." Kira said blushing again. "Gin's cut them, but he's never done that."
"Cut..." Kira couldn't see, but he could feel the anger, killing intent suddenly spill, flood all around him. Not at him, he could sense that he wasn't the target of it, but the sheer, heavy weight of it made Kira twist again as it sparked an anger, a rage that he hadn't even realized he'd held. A rage fed by learning more about what it was that he might have had with someone else... that he might, by raw chance and his own stumbling efforts, get another chance at.
"Jyuushiro," Kira said, shivering. "Please continue, sir. I want... want to know more."
He felt Ukitake start at the use of his personal name, the intent lessening and then fading away. "Yes, Izuru."
Jyuushiro took Kira's other nipple into his mouth and somehow sucked in such a way that Kira's nipple felt like it was fluttering, pulled pleasantly at the same time. A silken fall of Jyuushiro's hair slid against Kira's belly, cock, and balls. Kira moaned, pulling at his bindings, body arching again, lost again in the sensation.
As Jyuushiro licked and kissed his way down Kira's belly, the fall of hair moved as well, sliding, soothing, almost tickling. Kira gave a shout when Jyuushiro took the length of Kira's cock deep within his mouth and throat, just swallowing him whole into a wet, warm heat that closed and moved against his length. Kira pumped his hips, and Jyuushiro deftly moved with the motions, bobbing his head, twice. Kira felt the blood pool in his loins, the hard tightness right before orgasm. Kira stuttered, "S... S... Stop!"
Instantly Jyuushiro was off of him, making Kira cry out, bucking involuntarily at the sudden loss of sensation.
"I... I was going to... I was going to come," Kira whispered, oddly thrilled at having the power to stop the man tormenting him so deliciously.
"I thought that was the point of this exercise, Izuru," Jyuushiro breathed against Kira's ear. Kira moaned softly and turned towards the voice and got a kiss that tasted of his own precum.
When Kira caught his breath again, he said, "I... I don't want to without... without having you in me... without you coming with me, too. Please." It came out with more pleading than Kira intended, but he'd had to say it.
"You like anal penetration?" Jyuushiro asked softly.
"With you, yes. Please. I want... I want to give myself to you that way," Kira said back, and at Jyuushiro's spike of arousal, desire, he understood that he'd picked the right thing to say and it warmed him through. That the gift was understood.
"Hm. Okay... then I have one more thing I want to try on you..." Long, lean hands, picked up Kira's knees and Kira eagerly bent himself double.
His hips had always been very flexible, and it was an easy position for him to maintain. He shivered as he felt lips, tongue and teeth moving from the soft flesh under his knee and along the backs and insides of his thighs. Then the sharp drag of nails down soft flesh and he twisted, tensioned. "Oh, yes," he sighed and was rewarded by a quiet groan against his skin.
He felt Jyuushiro's kisses, nuzzles, nips traveling closer and closer to his groin, and then he felt Jyuushiro's tongue slide from his balls down. He cried out, shuddering, arching as the smooth sliding of that wet warmth touched the exquisitely sensitive skin of his anus. Stroking all along that small mouth and then probing, pushing hard at the tight ring of muscles. Kira cried out with each probe, pulling hard at his bindings. He could feel his cock and balls grow heavy with need. Then he sobbed with loss as that sensation ceased.
"Oh, that worked," Jyuushiro said, sounding very satisfied.
Then Kira got to taste the musk of his own anus as Jyuushiro kissed him again, deeply, probing as he'd probed his other mouth. Kira greedily kissed back. The man's weight pushed his legs up against his chest, and he could feel the hardness of the other's cock, the silken soft skin rubbing gently against his ass crack.
Against his mouth, Jyuushiro said softly, "Do you like being lubed inside? Or do you prefer just taking a lubed cock straight?"
"It... it's been a while. I think I'd like a little preparation, please," Kira said back, and stole another kiss before Jyuushiro leaned away again. "I really like how fingers feel."
And in answer a cool, slick, slender finger probed at the tight ring of his anus. Kira tried to relax and suddenly the muscles gave, and he gasped as he was penetrated. The hard slenderness slid into him and turned, crooking to stroke his prostate. Kira shivered, groaned at the feeling, and then twisted as a second finger joined the first. "Yes. Please," he pleaded, and both fingers started to slide in and out as Jyuushiro's other hand started to stroke his cock.
"No, stop," Kira was shocked again to have Jyuushiro stop exactly when asked to, the hand fell away, and the fingers within him stilled. "I'm... I'm too close... please... I think I'd like you in me now."
"As you wish," Jyuushiro said softly. Another click of the lube bottle lid, and then the heated touch of a cock head probed at Kira's anus, and he moaned and tried again, to relax, to let him in. A sensation of stretching, almost too much, almost too big and that hot invasion of his body, sliding surely deep within him. Kira's eyes rolled up in his head under the blindfold, the rope holding his wrists creaked as he pulled hard, his breath came out in a groan, and his hips rolled trying to accept...
Kira was glad that once in, Jyuushiro stilled, trembling. Kira took the moment Jyuushiro gave him to adjust to the penetration, and when he could, he tightened the muscles of his ass and heard the captain gasp, groan softly. The deep impalement made Kira breathe in short, gasping pants. "Good. I'm good, sir. You can... you can move a little now. Short to start, please?"
"Yes," Jyuushiro said breathlessly. Short, slow strokes made both of them groan with each movement. Kira moved his hips for more, and elicited soft cries from his partner and more whimpering cries from himself. The pace picked up, faster, stronger, longer strokes as both of them met the other's motion. Jyuushiro's hand suddenly seized Kira's cock and started pumping with his lube slick hand. Kira cried out, feeling his climax harden, tighten, flutter, and then explode through him.
He screamed when it hit. He felt his own come hit his belly. He heard Jyuushiro cry hard out as well, as his ass grabbed the captain's cock tight with his own orgasm. Then he felt Jyuushiro spasming within him, and he groaned and shuddered as his whole body tightened again. That brought gasps from Jyuushiro as well, and that lean body fell forward against his, sweat and come slick between them.
Hair fell over Kira's face, and he got to smell, first hand, the rosemary and mint of Jyuushiro's hair mixed with the scent that purely Jyuushiro. The captain's arms tightened around him and Kira nuzzled softly against that sweat damped, herbal hair. Both of them were breathing in big, heaving gasps that gradually slowed. Jyuushiro coughed once, but that was all Kira heard.
Both of them groaned a little as Jyuushiro moved so that he could kiss Kira, slow and sensually. They both sighed a little as Jyuushiro slipped from Kira's ass. Then Jyuushiro left him for a moment, and came back with warm, damp clothes and cleaned Kira up, still tied up, still blindfolded. The rubbing felt so good against his skin, Kira almost purred.
Then a sharp snap of kidou and his rope cuffs fell away.
"Don't move, yet, Izuru, let me rub these back to life," Jyuushiro said softly, and Kira whimpered a little as Jyuushiro rubbed the circulation back into his arms. Kira shivered a little, he'd never been taken care of like this, after. Cleaned and released whole, it was something he'd never had before.
Gentle hands stroked the cloth away from his eyes, and he got to see Jyuushiro's concerned face looking at him. Kira's breath caught again at the attention in those eyes, the intent gaze directed solely at and for him.
"You all right?" Jyuushiro asked.
"Yes," Kira said, truthfully. "I am."
Jyuushiro smiled, "Then get off the covers, I want to get under the blankets with you."
Kira groaned at having to move, but he did; and was rewarded by getting pulled up against the warm, lean length of Jyuushiro as they both were covered by smooth sheets and thick blankets. Jyuushiro gently stroked Kira's skin.
"Well, Izuru, what do you think?"
"Think? You want me to think again?" Kira said and the laughter in his hair made him blush with happiness this time.
"Mmmhm... Did we do what you wanted to do? We can do a more detailed post-mortem when we have our brains, but I'd like to know that, at least."
Kira leaned quietly against Jyuushiro's chest, hearing the steady heartbeat, the slightly rasping breath. He wondered if he'd pushed the captain too hard for his breathing to sound like that. "We didn't."
"No? What did we miss?"
Kira thought a bit about how to say it. He fingered his choker and shivered a little. "The terror. My fear. All the things I was so afraid of when I talked with you. We didn't touch any of it."
Jyuushiro squeezed him gently. "Sorry." There was laughter in that deep voice in the dark.
Kira chuckled as well. "I'm not. Not really. Thank you, Jyuushiro, for what you did give me, it was something I couldn't want because I didn't think it was possible. I couldn't even really wish for it because it seemed too insane. Thank you. And..."
"And?"
Kira said, slowly, "And I think I'd like to come back, sometime. Even if you do have to torture me again just to figure out what I want."
And Kira was rewarded with rich, rolling laughter. "Any time, Izuru. Any time."