H/D World cup Reveal
So the hd_worldcup reveal is up! I drew These Five Years for hd_worldcup. We all knew that already, didn't we. Yawn. :-) Someday I will be free from being the slave of my own style, and put out pic that nobody can recognize. Someday.
Here let me present you an improved version of These Five Years. The frame rate has been doubled to make the movement smoother. It gets more CPU intensive than the original, so beware. Also, I added a start button to the movie, which shows up after the movie finishes loading. The movie won't start by itself until you press the start button, so you can avoid seeing the movie and still read my rambling.
If you'd like to download the file but don't know how, here I have a compressed file that contains an html and the movie, for your convenience. Just download, uncompress, and open the html file. -> fanon_sword_enhanced.rar
Commentary:
These Five Years was done for myself.
The idea was born at the time when I thought drawing h/d no longer made me happy, that I should indulge myself something special before leaving fandom. It has been tweaked to suit the prompt Sword for hd_worldcup team Fanon, but the basic idea would have been executed in another form regardless of the prompt or the team, with or without worldcup.
During its making, I slowly realized what has made me so upset was that I have been drawing for the wrong reason. I couldn't remember the last time I made art for myself. It seemed to me that I needed to re-learn the fun of fanart, to focus in the making of the art itself rather than in public reaction. These Five Years went into that direction, and I made sure that it didn't deviate. Hell it might have just become some weird, horrible thing that nobody would care to take a second glance, but if that's what was going to happen, then at least I made myself something memorable in these ten weekends.
Some viewers have expressed negative reaction toward the theme. To that I totally understand, and I truly appreciate them openly voicing their opinions. I see it as the art's victory to trigger an emotion, albeit being a negative one. (In my book, the worst kind of reaction is no reaction.) The only thing I'd like to clarify is that I vehemently disagree the art carries any form of pro-rape message within. The art is labeled "NC-17, dub-con, bodily fluids". I trust my viewers to be mature enough to know how to apply judgment to a story, and I respect their decisions. I will continue to use my own standards in creating artwork, and the art I make I will take full responsibility.
Come to think of it, though, I probably should have added "disturbing theme" or similar words to the warning. Perhaps the level of disturbance didn't quite hit me because I've been working on the art for 2+ months and I've grown indifferent. To that I apologize. I'm quite new to the land of mature content, and I didn't know enough.
I am overjoyed to see that the art is well received, in spite of the twisted, disturbing theme. I've been squeeing over every review, and was thrilled to see old friends and new people, especially those I secretly (or not so secretly) admire have commented positively on the art. (oh god they liked it! THEY LIKED IT!!! IWINSQUEEEEEEEEALKJSHDLKJSHDSDF) Even though I keep telling myself to stop weighing my self-worth using feedback from people on the Internet, there are those of you whose words are highly potent confidence boost. It is something I can't get over with, being a mere human. I only hope that one day I could be Zen enough to turn off the comment feature, post art, sit back, and be content with it.
Thank you so much to everybody who have recced the art, and also a huge thanks to those who have openly expressed their thoughts about it. Positive or otherwise, they are all appreciated. I'll try my very best to reply to every comment left on the comm that needs a reply. I won't be invading others' territories and commenting on personal journals regarding the art. Also, the mod team of hd_worldcup has done a brilliant job in organizing the event, and dealing with many issues arisen from the beginning until the end. To that I express my complete admiration. *bows*
As for the story behind the art, I was very curious and thus have truly enjoyed reading the different ways it is interpreted. I'd prefer not elaborate on the story myself, as (1) I'm verbally challenged; and (2) doing so contributes nothing and ruins everything. The only thing I'd like to say is that I intended the art to be dub-con, but since everybody understands the story in their own ways and that we all have our own definitions of dub-con/non-con/non-non-con, I'm not going to insist.
Using Flash to present the series of pictures has been the plan from the start. It is not a new concept; it's just not wide-spread. I have been fascinated by the idea ever since I first saw it, and I was hitting the wall with new presentation ideas at the time. It seems that there's nothing new that hasn't been done already. Since I was using old boring watercolor for the art, making a flash movie seemed to be a fun way to add variety to my usual same-old angst / my usual same-old art.
The music is a clip from Chopin's Nocturne Op.55, No. 15 in F Minor. I chose this piece for I'm particularly fond of the pi mosso bit which, unfortunately, could not be inserted in the movie due to file size limitation. The clip was crappily cropped, and you can definitely tell that I'm no expert in sound editing. What I did was that I typed "audio editor" in the google bar and spent three minutes searching for one that's free. After repeated failures I decided I couldn't be bothered. It was hilarious how quickly I gave up. *shakes head* If anybody knows a foolproof audio editor, please share?
As for the big question, oh my god I can't believe I sounded so whiny but no, I still have stories to tell, so you will still have to endure my h/d art post. ;-P I might not be drawing/posting as much h/d as I used to, and I'll be more careful on putting appropriate warnings in future. Please protect yourself by being careful of them before clicking the cuts.
Lastly, I'd like to express my most sincere appreciation to the special someone for pulling me out of my silly misery back in January, and for my flist who didn't mind my whining and offered me support. Also a big thanks to my teammates who gave me encouraging words and suggestions. I wouldn't have done it without you.
(Forgot to mention: it felt so liberating not having to draw that damn pair of glasses on Harry. :-D )
I'll post all the watercolor pieces later. They will be posted either individually or in groups, with appropriate warnings and ratings. I hope you'd enjoy.
ETA: Individual watercolor pieces:
These Five Years Slides #1, #2 and #3 (H/D, PG-13)
These Five Years Slides #4 (H/D, PG-13)
These Five Years Slides #5, #6 , #7 and #8 (H/D, NC-17, dub-con)
These Five Years Slides #9, #10 and #11 (H/D, R)
These Five Years Slides #12 (H/D, NC-17, dub-con, bodily fluids, disturbing theme)
These Five Years Slides #13, #14 and #15 (H/D, PG-13)
These Five Years Slides #16 and #17 (H/D, R)
These Five Years Deleted Scene (H/D, PG-13)
Here let me present you an improved version of These Five Years. The frame rate has been doubled to make the movement smoother. It gets more CPU intensive than the original, so beware. Also, I added a start button to the movie, which shows up after the movie finishes loading. The movie won't start by itself until you press the start button, so you can avoid seeing the movie and still read my rambling.
If you'd like to download the file but don't know how, here I have a compressed file that contains an html and the movie, for your convenience. Just download, uncompress, and open the html file. -> fanon_sword_enhanced.rar
Commentary:
These Five Years was done for myself.
The idea was born at the time when I thought drawing h/d no longer made me happy, that I should indulge myself something special before leaving fandom. It has been tweaked to suit the prompt Sword for hd_worldcup team Fanon, but the basic idea would have been executed in another form regardless of the prompt or the team, with or without worldcup.
During its making, I slowly realized what has made me so upset was that I have been drawing for the wrong reason. I couldn't remember the last time I made art for myself. It seemed to me that I needed to re-learn the fun of fanart, to focus in the making of the art itself rather than in public reaction. These Five Years went into that direction, and I made sure that it didn't deviate. Hell it might have just become some weird, horrible thing that nobody would care to take a second glance, but if that's what was going to happen, then at least I made myself something memorable in these ten weekends.
Some viewers have expressed negative reaction toward the theme. To that I totally understand, and I truly appreciate them openly voicing their opinions. I see it as the art's victory to trigger an emotion, albeit being a negative one. (In my book, the worst kind of reaction is no reaction.) The only thing I'd like to clarify is that I vehemently disagree the art carries any form of pro-rape message within. The art is labeled "NC-17, dub-con, bodily fluids". I trust my viewers to be mature enough to know how to apply judgment to a story, and I respect their decisions. I will continue to use my own standards in creating artwork, and the art I make I will take full responsibility.
Come to think of it, though, I probably should have added "disturbing theme" or similar words to the warning. Perhaps the level of disturbance didn't quite hit me because I've been working on the art for 2+ months and I've grown indifferent. To that I apologize. I'm quite new to the land of mature content, and I didn't know enough.
I am overjoyed to see that the art is well received, in spite of the twisted, disturbing theme. I've been squeeing over every review, and was thrilled to see old friends and new people, especially those I secretly (or not so secretly) admire have commented positively on the art. (oh god they liked it! THEY LIKED IT!!! IWINSQUEEEEEEEEALKJSHDLKJSHDSDF) Even though I keep telling myself to stop weighing my self-worth using feedback from people on the Internet, there are those of you whose words are highly potent confidence boost. It is something I can't get over with, being a mere human. I only hope that one day I could be Zen enough to turn off the comment feature, post art, sit back, and be content with it.
Thank you so much to everybody who have recced the art, and also a huge thanks to those who have openly expressed their thoughts about it. Positive or otherwise, they are all appreciated. I'll try my very best to reply to every comment left on the comm that needs a reply. I won't be invading others' territories and commenting on personal journals regarding the art. Also, the mod team of hd_worldcup has done a brilliant job in organizing the event, and dealing with many issues arisen from the beginning until the end. To that I express my complete admiration. *bows*
As for the story behind the art, I was very curious and thus have truly enjoyed reading the different ways it is interpreted. I'd prefer not elaborate on the story myself, as (1) I'm verbally challenged; and (2) doing so contributes nothing and ruins everything. The only thing I'd like to say is that I intended the art to be dub-con, but since everybody understands the story in their own ways and that we all have our own definitions of dub-con/non-con/non-non-con, I'm not going to insist.
Using Flash to present the series of pictures has been the plan from the start. It is not a new concept; it's just not wide-spread. I have been fascinated by the idea ever since I first saw it, and I was hitting the wall with new presentation ideas at the time. It seems that there's nothing new that hasn't been done already. Since I was using old boring watercolor for the art, making a flash movie seemed to be a fun way to add variety to my usual same-old angst / my usual same-old art.
The music is a clip from Chopin's Nocturne Op.55, No. 15 in F Minor. I chose this piece for I'm particularly fond of the pi mosso bit which, unfortunately, could not be inserted in the movie due to file size limitation. The clip was crappily cropped, and you can definitely tell that I'm no expert in sound editing. What I did was that I typed "audio editor" in the google bar and spent three minutes searching for one that's free. After repeated failures I decided I couldn't be bothered. It was hilarious how quickly I gave up. *shakes head* If anybody knows a foolproof audio editor, please share?
As for the big question, oh my god I can't believe I sounded so whiny but no, I still have stories to tell, so you will still have to endure my h/d art post. ;-P I might not be drawing/posting as much h/d as I used to, and I'll be more careful on putting appropriate warnings in future. Please protect yourself by being careful of them before clicking the cuts.
Lastly, I'd like to express my most sincere appreciation to the special someone for pulling me out of my silly misery back in January, and for my flist who didn't mind my whining and offered me support. Also a big thanks to my teammates who gave me encouraging words and suggestions. I wouldn't have done it without you.
(Forgot to mention: it felt so liberating not having to draw that damn pair of glasses on Harry. :-D )
I'll post all the watercolor pieces later. They will be posted either individually or in groups, with appropriate warnings and ratings. I hope you'd enjoy.
ETA: Individual watercolor pieces:
These Five Years Slides #1, #2 and #3 (H/D, PG-13)
These Five Years Slides #4 (H/D, PG-13)
These Five Years Slides #5, #6 , #7 and #8 (H/D, NC-17, dub-con)
These Five Years Slides #9, #10 and #11 (H/D, R)
These Five Years Slides #12 (H/D, NC-17, dub-con, bodily fluids, disturbing theme)
These Five Years Slides #13, #14 and #15 (H/D, PG-13)
These Five Years Slides #16 and #17 (H/D, R)
These Five Years Deleted Scene (H/D, PG-13)