The Unquiet Past, part 1

[lilfluff]

After debating for much of the day I decided to post the first portion. For anyone who skipped the previous post this is my unofficial nanowrimo effort (I haven't actually taken the time to set up an account at NaNoWriMo.org). I spent the first several days working out who the characters were and a few of the major plot elements, which means that

Comments

[jeriendhal]

No she is not happy at all is she. Makes me wonder what happened to her grandmother and why being there hurts so much. Nice bit of characterization there. I was inclined by the opening paragraphs to think she was just walking around with a stick up her tail, but obviously there's something deeper going here.

Don't stop!

"Sharpears" hehe. The family has done well since poor Sam died.

[lilfluff]

*blink*

*ponders* *searches*

Well. No wonder I ended up settling on that as the best family name.

As for Doris, hmm, would it be telling to pull out notes? Guess it's no spoiler to say that she's trying to bury her emotions. And she really does think she's doing the right thing to do so.

"No really Doris, think of your great-great-great-great-(several minutes and deep breaths later)-great grandmother. What would she think?"

"Oh really now, you know that story is not canon."

"Doris dear, you aren't exactly canon either."

"Really now, next you will claim I'm not real."

Oh, look at the time. Almost midnight. Have to run. :}

[jeriendhal]

Snerks

Just don't have her run into a vulp Marine who's had 75% of his body replaced by cybernetics. :)

[lilfluff]

Well, I did get 800 more words last night (completely messing up my sleep, should have been heading to bed when I started rather than when I finished).

With fighting, explosions, cheep special effects... But no 75% cybernetic Marines, vulpine or otherwise.

[mjkj]

Nice one, thanks for sharing...

You really had me enthralled there :)

I just hope she will have some meetings with people that will get her over whatever it is that had happened (maybe someone who knew her grandmother and is able to put all into the right perspective/her grandmother's perspective for her...)

Looking forward for more :)

mjkj

[lilfluff]

Meet someone and gain some perspective? You mean [redacted] who she will discover is [redacted] because of [redacted]? Are you peeking at my notes? Next you'll say you already know that [redacted] is going to [also redacted].

Today was a wash for writing (and sadly breakfast too). But I'm hoping tomorrow will prove more fruitful.

(And fight the urge to do more editing. Write, thorough editing can wait until a draft is done! Hmm, well, perhaps to add in that missing word.)