I was so delighted to find this on my flist when I logged in today. Your awesome writing + Reid/Nathan = Perfect.
This whole thing was utterly engrossing, particularly the italicized portions from Nathan's POV. Somehow, even though you never say directly, you get the solid impression that he genuinely does love Reid and oh, God. REID. :(
When he was telling Hotch that he STILL loved Nathan, my heart broke for him right there. Then my heart broke for Hotch by the end because you know that he will never be Nathan; he will never take his place in Reid's heart and he'll be competing for Reid's love over that of a murderer and losing. Of course that may just be me being ridiculously shippy about Reid/Nathan, but that's how I see it and wow, the heartache down the line for ALL of them, even Nathan. *shakes head*
:D Thank you omg. I WAS SO INTIMIDATED BY THE THOUGHT OF WRITING THIS. It's an idea I had quite a while ago and I just was so nervous about trying to form it into an actual fic. I'm so glad that you liked it. ♥
NATHAN TOTALLY LOVES REID. In his own totally fucked up way. I'm glad you liked the Nathan POV flashbacks - after I'd written all of them, I was like "...damn, maybe it would have made more sense for those to be Reid's POV?" But I didn't want Nathan to only be seen through everyone else's eyes, if that makes sense. Plus I really loved writing Reid visiting him in hospital, THERE NEEDS TO BE MORE OF THAT.
I too am ridiculously shippy about Reid/Nathan so that ended up being the focus of this, obviously, and yeah - even though I really really love Reid/Hotch and felt kind of awful about not making things a little happier for them at the end, it just sort of seemed more realistic. Nathan is just so important to Reid that it sort of doesn't matter what he did - so much came before that, you know? And maybe one day he will love
( ... )
You're so welcome and you deserve a gabillion and one more comments for this piece. ♥
YES, Nathan does totally love Reid, so much so that he didn't take a weapon when he went to him. It's like... since he LOVES Reid; doesn't just want to screw Reid or find himself merely physically attracted to him then doesn't want to kill him. That shit is really EPIC to me when I think about it that way.
*flails* Maybe one day Reid will love Hotch as much or more than he does Nathan, but will he still also love Nathan, too? So. Much. Drama waiting in the wings there and Hotch getting sick of it, of coming in second and then this time, the angst would be EPIC and Reid would tell Nathan and Nathan would pet him until the guards made him stop and omg, I am getting carried away...
You must, simply must, write some Reid/Nathan porn one of these days. I would pay to read that, no shit and it would be awesome. *nods*
Plus I really loved writing Reid visiting him in hospital, THERE NEEDS TO BE MORE OF THAT.WITH MAKING OUT FOR BONUS POINTS
( ... )
Yes! I really love the idea of it being sort of a RISK and like a possibility that Reid is aware of, that Nathan might actually want to kill him, that Nathan might have to fight the urge...but he never actually does it, and he definitely wouldn't plan to.
Oh godddd it was honestly hard to stop writing where I did, DON'T MAKE ME WANT TO WRITE MORE OF THIS. I sort of figured Nathan would just assume Hotch was like ~supervising~ the meeting, but I kept thinking about how he'd react if he knew they were together. And then just this whole like, totally messed up love triangle thing going on while Nathan is still in jail, and. It would be so crazy
( ... )
OH GOD HI I'M SO GLAD YOU LIKED THIS, AFTER EVERYTHING, ALL OUR RIDICULOUS MESSAGES. ♥
I kept thinking maybe I shouldn't ramble about the plot so much to you because it would spoil it, so I'm glad you enjoyed it despite probably knowing everything that was going to happen next. XD
And I don't mind waiting! I like it when comments are on the actual fic just to keep everything together, but if you have like, extra stuff to say then a message is fine. GAH ILU. ♥
I know exactly what you mean about their relationship - that's what fascinates me so much about it, the way they just understand each other and they're so similar in some ways. And ugh, Reid wanting to save Nathan so desperately even though he knows that he can't.
I think I prefer it when Nathan hasn't actually killed anyone and it's just the desire that he's struggling with, too, but I was really interested to explore the idea of him being the actual unsub. And how Reid's feelings would change (or not change) in that scenario. Anyway, I'm glad you enjoyed it!! Thank you for your lovely comment.
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I was so delighted to find this on my flist when I logged in today. Your awesome writing + Reid/Nathan = Perfect.
This whole thing was utterly engrossing, particularly the italicized portions from Nathan's POV. Somehow, even though you never say directly, you get the solid impression that he genuinely does love Reid and oh, God. REID. :(
When he was telling Hotch that he STILL loved Nathan, my heart broke for him right there. Then my heart broke for Hotch by the end because you know that he will never be Nathan; he will never take his place in Reid's heart and he'll be competing for Reid's love over that of a murderer and losing. Of course that may just be me being ridiculously shippy about Reid/Nathan, but that's how I see it and wow, the heartache down the line for ALL of them, even Nathan. *shakes head*
Brutal, wrenching, BRILLIANT.
*twirls this*
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NATHAN TOTALLY LOVES REID. In his own totally fucked up way. I'm glad you liked the Nathan POV flashbacks - after I'd written all of them, I was like "...damn, maybe it would have made more sense for those to be Reid's POV?" But I didn't want Nathan to only be seen through everyone else's eyes, if that makes sense. Plus I really loved writing Reid visiting him in hospital, THERE NEEDS TO BE MORE OF THAT.
I too am ridiculously shippy about Reid/Nathan so that ended up being the focus of this, obviously, and yeah - even though I really really love Reid/Hotch and felt kind of awful about not making things a little happier for them at the end, it just sort of seemed more realistic. Nathan is just so important to Reid that it sort of doesn't matter what he did - so much came before that, you know? And maybe one day he will love ( ... )
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YES, Nathan does totally love Reid, so much so that he didn't take a weapon when he went to him. It's like... since he LOVES Reid; doesn't just want to screw Reid or find himself merely physically attracted to him then doesn't want to kill him. That shit is really EPIC to me when I think about it that way.
*flails* Maybe one day Reid will love Hotch as much or more than he does Nathan, but will he still also love Nathan, too? So. Much. Drama waiting in the wings there and Hotch getting sick of it, of coming in second and then this time, the angst would be EPIC and Reid would tell Nathan and Nathan would pet him until the guards made him stop and omg, I am getting carried away...
You must, simply must, write some Reid/Nathan porn one of these days. I would pay to read that, no shit and it would be awesome. *nods*
Plus I really loved writing Reid visiting him in hospital, THERE NEEDS TO BE MORE OF THAT.WITH MAKING OUT FOR BONUS POINTS ( ... )
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Oh godddd it was honestly hard to stop writing where I did, DON'T MAKE ME WANT TO WRITE MORE OF THIS. I sort of figured Nathan would just assume Hotch was like ~supervising~ the meeting, but I kept thinking about how he'd react if he knew they were together. And then just this whole like, totally messed up love triangle thing going on while Nathan is still in jail, and. It would be so crazy ( ... )
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SO I'VE READ IT AND I WILL START WORKING ON A COMMENT A.S.A.P. LOL DO YOU WANT THE COMMENT ON HERE OR IN A MESSAGE? HAHA
THIS IS EPIC. YOU ARE EPIC. MY LOVE FOR YOU IS EPIC. SOOO MUUUCH EPICNEEESSSS.
/STARTS REPLY
I SHALL BE BACK IN, LIKE, UNFORTUNATELY MAYBE A DAY OR TWO. I'M SORRY <33
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I kept thinking maybe I shouldn't ramble about the plot so much to you because it would spoil it, so I'm glad you enjoyed it despite probably knowing everything that was going to happen next. XD
And I don't mind waiting! I like it when comments are on the actual fic just to keep everything together, but if you have like, extra stuff to say then a message is fine. GAH ILU. ♥
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I know exactly what you mean about their relationship - that's what fascinates me so much about it, the way they just understand each other and they're so similar in some ways. And ugh, Reid wanting to save Nathan so desperately even though he knows that he can't.
I think I prefer it when Nathan hasn't actually killed anyone and it's just the desire that he's struggling with, too, but I was really interested to explore the idea of him being the actual unsub. And how Reid's feelings would change (or not change) in that scenario. Anyway, I'm glad you enjoyed it!! Thank you for your lovely comment.
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