[17] How deep we fall
Title: How deep we fall
Rating: G
Pairing: Suho/D.O
Warnings: Word vomit. Unbeta-ed. Must read How Fragile We Are to understand fully.
Summary: The sound of Suho's even breathing lulls Kyungsoo to sleep.
It happens two years after their debut.
They’re standing backstage of a prominent music show, patiently waiting for their turn to perform. Their outfits are tight and stifling but there’s really no way around it. Baekhyun and Chanyeol are busy fumbling with the intricate chains strapped around their coats while Kai and Sehun are focused on the group dancing on stage. Kyungsoo is trying to look interested but he’s aware of Suho’s gaze on them and he’s trying not to blush.
I'm an idiot, he thinks.
Kyungsoo doesn’t know when he had started to gravitate towards their leader. But it’s becoming instinctive and he finds himself aware of everything about the older male. And right now, Suho is looking at them like a proud father, a habit he always does when he thinks none of them notice. Suho has always taken is father role quite seriously.
It’s hot and uncomfortable and Kyungsoo’s peripheral view catches Suho accepting a bottle of water, catches him giving a thankful blinding smile to the staff who gave it. Kyungsoo swallows down the feeling of jealousy.
The heat must be unbearable because Suho takes a huge gulp right before their group name gets called and they take position.
They stand under dimmed lights, their fans filling the set with screams of encouragement. Kyungsoo quickly looks over to Suho and sees him grimace. Is he in pain? The flash of hurt lasts only a second. But Kyungsoo sees it, Kyungsoo always sees. He wants to reach out and ask him what’s wrong, tell him that there’s no need to be nervous. They’ve done this a hundred times already and he is perfect the way he is. But the music starts and Kyungsoo knows he should focus on the performance. They can do this routine with their eyes closed but he will not mess this up.
Kyungsoo isn’t Kyungsoo anymore. He is D.O.
They dance in perfect unison and D.O opens the song with his captivating voice, powerful and solid. They shift and slide and Suho opens his mouth to sing his lines. But his voice comes out as a croak, not the steady lilting sound it’s supposed to be. It throws everyone off the rhythm and then he’s falling and falling...
D.O disappears.
Kyungsoo feels his blood turn cold.
He’s never really known fear until that moment, Kyungsoo realizes. It’s sixteen hours later and the steady sound of Suho’s heart rate monitor is threatening to drive him insane. Beep, beep, beep. He doesn’t remember the last time he’s been to a hospital or the even the last time he’s cried so much. But he’s here and he’s never felt so useless in his life. The rest of the group is huddled together with their managers, discussing what actions to take but Kyungsoo feels so tired and half of their words don’t even register.
He just wants Suho to wake up. It’s a consuming feeling, a crushing hope that looms over the room like a dark cloud. Please wake up. Please wake up. Please wake up. Please wake up. Please wake up. Kyungsoo just wants Suho to wake up, to tell them that he’s going to be fine.
Please wake up
Please wake up.
Please wake up.
Please wake up.
Please wake up.
He chants it in his head as if it would will Suho back to life, return him to the strong leader he’s always been.
Please wake up.
Please wake up.
Please wake up.
Please wake up.
Please wake up.
Suho opens his eyes.
Kyungsoo breathes again.
Everything about Suho is pleasant and sweet. Kyungsoo remembers the first time he had seen him, all syrupy smiles and gentle gestures. Back then; he had been Joonmyun the trainee, not Suho the leader. But he had an innate grace and calmness that Kyungsoo knew he could never possess. It wasn’t a challenge to be ensnared by Suho’s natural charm. He was kind and attractive and a loyal friend to his peers. With all his uncertainty about being a trainee, Kyungsoo was only ever sure that he would not be immune to Suho’s innocent allure the moment he had set eyes on him.
But it was a perplexing circumstance. Kyungsoo had anxiously prepared for SM’s rigorous training program, a battlefield of sorts for aspiring singers like him. However, he certainly did not prepare to be drawn to a boy who should’ve been treated as a rival but who also smiled as brightly as the sun.
Fast-forward to the present, Kyungsoo is sitting on the extra cot beside the hospital window, looking at Suho’s slumbering face, smooth and pale. He thinks he must be lucky that they had been place in the same group. Suho was a trainee for seven years, Kyungsoo for one. In a lot of ways, he feels that he wasn’t entirely ready to debut when they had included him in EXO. But Suho was there and that was enough reason for him to put down any doubts or hesitations. It was his wish to constantly be with the boy who claimed his affections even though Kyungsoo lacked the courage to confess his feelings.
Suho was a great friend, is a great friend.
And Kyungsoo watches him with a promise to always be whatever Suho needs him to be. A friend, a brother. Suho may never know just how special he is to him. But it is enough that Kyungsoo is here with him, caring for him…
Loving him.
The sound of Suho’s even breathing lulls Kyungsoo to sleep.
A/N: ginginchanchan asked to translate this to Vietnamese. ^^;; You can check it out here. :)
Rating: G
Pairing: Suho/D.O
Warnings: Word vomit. Unbeta-ed. Must read How Fragile We Are to understand fully.
Summary: The sound of Suho's even breathing lulls Kyungsoo to sleep.
It happens two years after their debut.
They’re standing backstage of a prominent music show, patiently waiting for their turn to perform. Their outfits are tight and stifling but there’s really no way around it. Baekhyun and Chanyeol are busy fumbling with the intricate chains strapped around their coats while Kai and Sehun are focused on the group dancing on stage. Kyungsoo is trying to look interested but he’s aware of Suho’s gaze on them and he’s trying not to blush.
I'm an idiot, he thinks.
Kyungsoo doesn’t know when he had started to gravitate towards their leader. But it’s becoming instinctive and he finds himself aware of everything about the older male. And right now, Suho is looking at them like a proud father, a habit he always does when he thinks none of them notice. Suho has always taken is father role quite seriously.
It’s hot and uncomfortable and Kyungsoo’s peripheral view catches Suho accepting a bottle of water, catches him giving a thankful blinding smile to the staff who gave it. Kyungsoo swallows down the feeling of jealousy.
The heat must be unbearable because Suho takes a huge gulp right before their group name gets called and they take position.
They stand under dimmed lights, their fans filling the set with screams of encouragement. Kyungsoo quickly looks over to Suho and sees him grimace. Is he in pain? The flash of hurt lasts only a second. But Kyungsoo sees it, Kyungsoo always sees. He wants to reach out and ask him what’s wrong, tell him that there’s no need to be nervous. They’ve done this a hundred times already and he is perfect the way he is. But the music starts and Kyungsoo knows he should focus on the performance. They can do this routine with their eyes closed but he will not mess this up.
Kyungsoo isn’t Kyungsoo anymore. He is D.O.
They dance in perfect unison and D.O opens the song with his captivating voice, powerful and solid. They shift and slide and Suho opens his mouth to sing his lines. But his voice comes out as a croak, not the steady lilting sound it’s supposed to be. It throws everyone off the rhythm and then he’s falling and falling...
D.O disappears.
Kyungsoo feels his blood turn cold.
He’s never really known fear until that moment, Kyungsoo realizes. It’s sixteen hours later and the steady sound of Suho’s heart rate monitor is threatening to drive him insane. Beep, beep, beep. He doesn’t remember the last time he’s been to a hospital or the even the last time he’s cried so much. But he’s here and he’s never felt so useless in his life. The rest of the group is huddled together with their managers, discussing what actions to take but Kyungsoo feels so tired and half of their words don’t even register.
He just wants Suho to wake up. It’s a consuming feeling, a crushing hope that looms over the room like a dark cloud. Please wake up. Please wake up. Please wake up. Please wake up. Please wake up. Kyungsoo just wants Suho to wake up, to tell them that he’s going to be fine.
Please wake up
Please wake up.
Please wake up.
Please wake up.
Please wake up.
He chants it in his head as if it would will Suho back to life, return him to the strong leader he’s always been.
Please wake up.
Please wake up.
Please wake up.
Please wake up.
Please wake up.
Suho opens his eyes.
Kyungsoo breathes again.
Everything about Suho is pleasant and sweet. Kyungsoo remembers the first time he had seen him, all syrupy smiles and gentle gestures. Back then; he had been Joonmyun the trainee, not Suho the leader. But he had an innate grace and calmness that Kyungsoo knew he could never possess. It wasn’t a challenge to be ensnared by Suho’s natural charm. He was kind and attractive and a loyal friend to his peers. With all his uncertainty about being a trainee, Kyungsoo was only ever sure that he would not be immune to Suho’s innocent allure the moment he had set eyes on him.
But it was a perplexing circumstance. Kyungsoo had anxiously prepared for SM’s rigorous training program, a battlefield of sorts for aspiring singers like him. However, he certainly did not prepare to be drawn to a boy who should’ve been treated as a rival but who also smiled as brightly as the sun.
Fast-forward to the present, Kyungsoo is sitting on the extra cot beside the hospital window, looking at Suho’s slumbering face, smooth and pale. He thinks he must be lucky that they had been place in the same group. Suho was a trainee for seven years, Kyungsoo for one. In a lot of ways, he feels that he wasn’t entirely ready to debut when they had included him in EXO. But Suho was there and that was enough reason for him to put down any doubts or hesitations. It was his wish to constantly be with the boy who claimed his affections even though Kyungsoo lacked the courage to confess his feelings.
Suho was a great friend, is a great friend.
And Kyungsoo watches him with a promise to always be whatever Suho needs him to be. A friend, a brother. Suho may never know just how special he is to him. But it is enough that Kyungsoo is here with him, caring for him…
Loving him.
The sound of Suho’s even breathing lulls Kyungsoo to sleep.
A/N: ginginchanchan asked to translate this to Vietnamese. ^^;; You can check it out here. :)