Comments | laverick: Of Mice and Men

laverick

Of Mice and Men

Feb 26, 2009 09:35

For those keeping track of my eharmony adventures, maybe you're having better luck than I am keeping them all straight. A couple weekends ago, I had a date with an amazing guy who suffered a spinal cord injury 18 years ago and is paralyzed from his shoulders down. He went on to get two master's and a PhD, and he lives by himself in a house he had ( Read more... )

dating, creative recovery, food, writing, reporting, health

Comments 12

sabethea February 26 2009, 15:39:22 UTC

Goodness me, you meet a lot of people. Is it terrifying? I mean, having to do the small talk 'getting to know you' thing over and over again.

The people you meet are always so interesting and so varied, as well. And Art therapy and writing and - wow, you do so much!

adamant_turtle February 26 2009, 18:14:03 UTC

having to do the small talk 'getting to know you'thing over and over again

That's what keeps me from going out more than I do. Honestly, I find it as exhausting as another freakin' job! I already work full-time, kthanks...

Is Naked Guy, like, an official nudist? Or is it just some kind of fetish thing?

laverick March 3 2009, 03:13:38 UTC

naked guy is an official nudist...who likes to masturbate on camera. Um, yeah.

Yes, it is another flipping job. But a fun one. I don't do small talk as much as I can help it. I abhor it. I actually think people find it refreshing once they know how to handle the deep questions.

laverick March 3 2009, 03:16:10 UTC

I've only actually met three of them in person so far. Will meet three more this week. It can be terrifying if I put too much pressure on it. But if I go into the situation thinking I hold the cards, there are more options to choose from, if this doesn't work out, it makes it easier somehow. And I skip the small talk beyond the bare necessities. I do love the variety of interests and personalities I've been getting to know.

Art therapy, writing, and teaching--it's a little bit of a few things, so it doesn't get too overwhelming.

stmaybe February 26 2009, 17:31:22 UTC

you've been busy!

tulipchica February 26 2009, 18:56:25 UTC

What an interesting mix of men! Huh. Glad you're having fun with it! Makes for life stories and experiences.

wlotus February 26 2009, 19:07:56 UTC

This is my first time hearing about Art for Healing. I just emailed Art For Healing NYC to inquire about volunteer opportunities for a photographer like myself.

laverick March 3 2009, 03:17:12 UTC

I'm glad you could find out about the program. Let me know how Art for Healing NYC works out for you!

philosofialogos February 26 2009, 21:50:31 UTC

Ha. What fun dating stories. It is a fun anthropological experiment, but so many failed dates do tend to grate on you after a while.

I was especially intrigued by the story of dating the paralyzed guy. Feeding him is certainly something you would have never even thought about before agreeing to a date. And the touch issues are interesting, too. I'd never considered that before. He sounds like a great guy. I hope he meets a nice nurse one day because it seems like the type of person who'd be able to endure that type of relationship would be someone accustomed to that sort of thing on a regular basis who wouldn't feel put off by the dedication required.

laverick March 3 2009, 03:21:07 UTC

Fortunately I haven't actually had so many failed dates. I've only been on dates with three different guys in person. This last one was a wonderful date, and I am hopeful about our second date. The others I've exchanged emails and sometimes also phone calls with before I decided it would go no further. Though I am supposed to meet 3 more this week too.

I think you are right about the type of woman paralyzed guy needs in his life. He needs a girlfriend who is totally comfortable being a permanent caretaker/nurse as well as long-term love. I just hope we can stay friends.