Comments | lapiratess: Fic: "Falling Away"

lapiratess

Fic: "Falling Away"

Aug 14, 2006 14:31

Title: Falling Away
Author: lapiratess
Pairing/Characters: Technically Will/Elizabeth
Word Count: 1,300
Rating: R for sexual themes
Genre: Angsty semi-smut
Summary: The four times Will and Elizabeth make love. Spoilers for DMC.
Disclaimer: Last I checked, I wasn't ridiculously rich and famous. Therefore, none of this is mine. I just like to play in other ( Read more... )

potc, fic

Comments 7

thedarkmaterial August 14 2006, 21:55:27 UTC

One of my...odder preferences, I suppose...is for bitter lovelessness, and you've captured that excellently in three out of the four sections here. There's a big difference between hate sex and empty sex, and I haven't seen a lot of the latter (which is not to say it's not out there, mind you; I just don't get around as much, fic-wise, as some people do). Here, even when there's emotion present, there's so much distance between Will and Liz that it might as well not be, because it will never reach from one to the other. I really can't decide if I want to cry, or go take a cold shower. Maybe both.

lapiratess August 16 2006, 03:16:04 UTC

Thanks for the comments! I'm so glad the emptiness vibe came through - I was really trying to show that though they're going through the motions, neither of them are really there.

martian_aries August 14 2006, 22:00:52 UTC

This is very sad, but gorgeous, and phenomenally well-written. I love your characterizations, the inevitable rift between the two, Will's reluctance to leave and Elizabeth's longing for freedom. The love scenes are also very tasteful and poetic, not at all purple or porny --which is a mark of deft writing, and which I appreciate (good love scenes are so difficult to find). All in all, this is a great piece of work. Well done!

Also, I love your icon. That's exactly what I think every time I look at that picture. That or "Om..."

lapiratess August 16 2006, 03:17:53 UTC

Thanks so much! The love scenes were particularly difficult to write so I'm quite glad you liked them.

hereswith August 14 2006, 23:03:25 UTC

This is very good, and very sad and poignant. You've really managed to convey the distance between them that neither of them is able to cross, and how it grows ever wider, inexorably and inevitably, until there's nothing to hold on to anymore and no other paths to take than the one they choose to take. Lovely work!

lila82 August 15 2006, 01:07:07 UTC

I'm really enjoying this trend in POTC fic regarding W/E and the inevitable end of their love affair. This portrait of them as growing further and further apart, too cowardly to admit the distance between them and too afraid to admit it might really be over, was wonderfully done, with the right amount of sizzle and heat, but such painful sadness as well. There are no villains, no one to blame, because they can't control who they love or their hearts choose, only the bitter realization that what they had and built their lives around doesn't exist anymore. I like this self-possessed Will as well. He's still noble and loyal to a fault, but able to recognize his own feelings and move past them, rather than letting them simmer to the point of destruction.

Wonderful story, and not the least bit rusty.

Lovely belladonnabelle August 17 2006, 07:02:23 UTC

I really did love this fic. The words and sentences are so simple and yet very poignant. I adore Will and I feel an unbearable sadness for him in the movie because every person he gives his heart to seems to take it and throw it away. I love the pattern as well. Using the subject in order to get across their feelings and emotions which makes it all the more brilliant! Love it.