My boy and I have talked about this a lot (except, I'm sort of interested in dating other guys too...maybe. But I'm not really that thrilled with him dating a chick without me involved. I guess there's a lot of baggage there and I hope I'll be able to overcome it if I do ever seriously want to pursue other relationships...because that wouldn't be very fair to him to be like I GET TO BUT YOU DON'T...UNLESS I FALL IN LOVE WITH A GIRL AND SHE LIKES US BOTH. SO THERE. But anyway, he's far less jealous of a person than I am... as I said, baggage and whatnot). So yeah, I don't think you're weird for thinking any of this. In fact, I think it's pretty normal. Also, I totally got a serious crush when I was younger and never got rid of it...so, I understand what you're saying entirely about that person as well
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Do you live in Oregon? Because I would totally go out and meet you if you did.
I'm not really worried about what other people think, and it would take some convincing to make me think I'm weird. Just realistic: the chances of there being someone both me and boy could love who could love both me and boy at the same time are not too high. Factor in the location aspect and the fact that he is Ever So Very Straight, thus limiting ourselves pretty much to "women in or very near this little cluster of three tiny towns." It's just not likely.
You must read incredibly fast. I only just posted this.
Oh, and I think that if I could find two guys who would be willing to date me and each other, that would be brilliant. One of my favorite non-OTP ships is Weasley twins/Angelina because of that. But that is, again, assuming (which I am not willing to do) that the current relationship doesn't hold out.
Heehee, I live in WA so not TOO too far away. I don't know if my boy would appreciate that though ;)
I'm glad you don't care what other people think. I guess I have a very thin skin and it really bothers me when people think I'm ZOMG IMMORAL. For me, I guess...well...I'm still not really sure how it would work but I personally don't have an issue with dating people that are not dating my boy as well (and he doesn't either, but I think it is preferable to him to find a girl who would date us both if we ever do plunge into poly-land. He's Ever So Very Straight as well.) But as I said, that would be some sort of horrible double standard that I would feel bad about (until I could get over my jealousy issues >_<) But yes, since you're only considering girls who would date you and your boy that does make the perspective dating pool even smaller. A friend of mine in a similar position joined some dating websites and posted some craigslists ads... it's not the most romantic way to meet someone but it might work for you (and might work
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He has some jealousy issues along with his low self-esteem, so me looking for someone for just me to date would Absolutely Not Fly with him. I use capitalization as emphasis a lot, I hope it hasn't got annoying yet. And I would not be pleased a bit if he found someone for just him to date without me. I'm not looking for any sort of open relationship; it would be as closed as the most monogamous marriage, just with three of us.
Imagine dating identical twins! And ones as attractive as the Weasley twins! Angelina is a very very lucky girl, in my opinion. Because damn. Those are men that are sexy in a 'do me' kind of way. But then, those are not real men. Those are fictional men and movie stars. They hardly even count.
I really can't give you any advice in the relationship (with a boy) department. I knew I was gay even before i knew whay gay was at 14 when I met Tanya and now 31 years I like you I have never seen or felt a real cock, I have kissed a guy but I didn't like it. I will tell you one thisn however you need to follow your heart. Now F?F relationship advice I can give LOL
I need to have sex with a woman, too. Like... yeah. Like... soon. This summer I'm going to head to Boystown more often. I might make dark_branwen come with me. I don't have any other LGBT friends near me who would want to come. But I want to. I want to meet women, dammit. I know how you feel. I've done NOTHING, and I've been mostly single for three years, half of which I hadn't come out to myself totally yet, but still that's really no excuse. You should really start watching The L Word (awesome lesbian show) with me. It's amazing. And there are lesbians. And lots of sex and feelings. You'd like it
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I think I agree with Scarlet's third paragrapgh. Though rather than a traditional open relationship I think maybe he should let you just sleep with a woman once or maybe twice just so you can have that experience. I think it would be a really valuable experience for you, and clear your thoughts. Would you let him have sex with a boy if he wanted to explore his sexuality? If you did would you want to be involved?
I almost think involving him in the experience would be a bad idea, a threesome that is. Because then you are somewhat trapped into worrying about what he is thinking of your actions, your performance, and there is still cock involved at the end of the day. Mostly though I just think you couldn't really let loose and enjoy the experience for you if he was involved as well. I think it might be too awkward. But then again I have never had a threesome so I can't prove any of that. I mean ya know except for the fact that cock is still involved... but I digress.
I would absolutely let him have sex with a boy, but he is not at all interested. And I would even let him do it on his own. It would be great if I could just sleep with a woman once or twice, but then he would want to sleep with same woman once or twice or at the same time, and that's not what I want.
I've been saying that a lot lately.
It's not that I'd mind letting him at her, but how would she feel about it? "Hi, I really want t have sex with you, but if I do you have to let my boyfriend do so too. Is that okay?" How many girls are going to jump at that opportunity?
And yes, I absolutely don't want him involved in the whole experience. This is something I need to be able to do on my own at least once. Your observations in this paragraph are spot-on.
I think your boy should let you hit a gay bar. You obviously love him very much, but this seams like something you really need to do. Honestly, it would probably be safer for him to allow you to fuck a complete stranger as opposed to fucking someone you might really care about, even if that person is being shared. Who's to say you won't completely fall in love with this woman and run off to the far reaches of the earth with her?
I don't know what you should do, honey. I just don't think you should deny yourself an experience that is vital to your happiness.
I would offer myself up, but I has a boy too. Perhaps if we snuck off to some little place and did it in secret. Anyway, "Purity is for drinking water, not people."-FSM
First of all, sneaking off and doing anything in secret is not an option. I've been down that road and it is not a fun road.
Second, hitting a gay bar would be great, except how do I know if she's clean? Plus, the attractiveness of those women is not quite guaranteed. I mean, if it were someone I cared about, it wouldn't matter, but if I'm fucking a stranger, they had better be a REALLY fucking hot stranger.
I actually completely understand that feeling towards guys. Guys are a rarity for me to find attractive, and 99% of the time, it's less of a "OMG SO HOT, DO ME." and more of a "You're witty and smart, and really funny. I guess I wouldn't mind having sex with you." It's less of a want, so much as, this sounds weird, a courtesy. But with women, it's an instant thing. God, women are so hot
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Oh, yes, I'd love to discuss the very real and serious possibility that I need to fuck a woman. And for a second there, five minutes ago when I was replying to Scarlett, I thought I was. And then he wasn't really being serious.
Which is okay. Realistically, this is a fairly intermittent thing with me, and the risk is too great compared to the reward, as far as I'm concerned. It may become a greater issue in the future, at which time we'll talk about it. Today, I just needed to vent.
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I'm not really worried about what other people think, and it would take some convincing to make me think I'm weird. Just realistic: the chances of there being someone both me and boy could love who could love both me and boy at the same time are not too high. Factor in the location aspect and the fact that he is Ever So Very Straight, thus limiting ourselves pretty much to "women in or very near this little cluster of three tiny towns." It's just not likely.
You must read incredibly fast. I only just posted this.
Oh, and I think that if I could find two guys who would be willing to date me and each other, that would be brilliant. One of my favorite non-OTP ships is Weasley twins/Angelina because of that. But that is, again, assuming (which I am not willing to do) that the current relationship doesn't hold out.
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I'm glad you don't care what other people think. I guess I have a very thin skin and it really bothers me when people think I'm ZOMG IMMORAL. For me, I guess...well...I'm still not really sure how it would work but I personally don't have an issue with dating people that are not dating my boy as well (and he doesn't either, but I think it is preferable to him to find a girl who would date us both if we ever do plunge into poly-land. He's Ever So Very Straight as well.) But as I said, that would be some sort of horrible double standard that I would feel bad about (until I could get over my jealousy issues >_<) But yes, since you're only considering girls who would date you and your boy that does make the perspective dating pool even smaller. A friend of mine in a similar position joined some dating websites and posted some craigslists ads... it's not the most romantic way to meet someone but it might work for you (and might work ( ... )
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Imagine dating identical twins! And ones as attractive as the Weasley twins! Angelina is a very very lucky girl, in my opinion. Because damn. Those are men that are sexy in a 'do me' kind of way. But then, those are not real men. Those are fictional men and movie stars. They hardly even count.
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I almost think involving him in the experience would be a bad idea, a threesome that is. Because then you are somewhat trapped into worrying about what he is thinking of your actions, your performance, and there is still cock involved at the end of the day. Mostly though I just think you couldn't really let loose and enjoy the experience for you if he was involved as well. I think it might be too awkward. But then again I have never had a threesome so I can't prove any of that. I mean ya know except for the fact that cock is still involved... but I digress.
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I've been saying that a lot lately.
It's not that I'd mind letting him at her, but how would she feel about it? "Hi, I really want t have sex with you, but if I do you have to let my boyfriend do so too. Is that okay?" How many girls are going to jump at that opportunity?
And yes, I absolutely don't want him involved in the whole experience. This is something I need to be able to do on my own at least once. Your observations in this paragraph are spot-on.
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You had a chance to, woman!
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I don't know what you should do, honey. I just don't think you should deny yourself an experience that is vital to your happiness.
I would offer myself up, but I has a boy too. Perhaps if we snuck off to some little place and did it in secret. Anyway, "Purity is for drinking water, not people."-FSM
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Second, hitting a gay bar would be great, except how do I know if she's clean? Plus, the attractiveness of those women is not quite guaranteed. I mean, if it were someone I cared about, it wouldn't matter, but if I'm fucking a stranger, they had better be a REALLY fucking hot stranger.
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Which is okay. Realistically, this is a fairly intermittent thing with me, and the risk is too great compared to the reward, as far as I'm concerned. It may become a greater issue in the future, at which time we'll talk about it. Today, I just needed to vent.
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