Breath Catches

[lantairvlea]

I have been slowly putting things back in the tack room since the first storm last September. Things that don't get used as much have lingered like the Western draft saddle and the second bareback pad. I have been glancing at Z's halter as I have pulled things out of the workshop and worked around in it. That didn't really bother me. I was

Comments

[herecirm]

Wish I could help you feel better. :( I brought Pepsi's bridle home a couple of months ago and hung it in the hallway, but haven't touched it since - even though the reason I brought it home was to clean it up. The bit still has skanky dried grass stuck to it from where I let her graze the last time I walked her out. I don't really know what my plan is once that's done. Like you say, it feels like if you don't do certain things, then she isn't really gone. She's just ... elsewhere.

So many hugs to you. Don't feel like you have to do things or move on just because it's been two months; you can't measure something like this, or give yourself deadlines for when things ought to change. These horses are such a big part of our lives and accepting that they're gone is monumentally hard.

[lantairvlea]

Knowing that is normal is an odd comfort. Saddened that others experience this, but knowing that it is just all a part of the process is a small relief.

Thank you.

So far as my beliefs go, in the grand scheme of things, she is elsewhere, but at the moment that is still a frustrating thought because I want her HERE.

[meri_sielu]

I know how this feels, I get the same kind of jarring feeling whenever I find any of Arya's fur on anything. :(

[lantairvlea]

On the one hand you want it to stop and on the other you don't because you want to stay connected.