let's go gaily forward
St. Harvey of San Francisco
Today is National Coming Out Day! This year's theme, courtesy of the HRC, is 'Talk About It':This year will also mark an important hallmark, as National Coming Out Day, Oct. 11, 2007, falls on the 20th anniversary of the 1987 Gay and Lesbian March on Washington, and the unfurling of the AIDS Quilt on the National Mall. National Coming Out Day was celebrated a year to the day later as a way of continuing the spirit of openness, honesty and visibility that the march and the AIDS Quilt presentation inspired.
"Twenty years ago, as the AIDS crisis was raging, coming out was literally a matter of life and death," said Mark Shields, director of HRC’s Coming Out Project. "In many ways, we have come a very long way in a relatively short time, and yet that lesson still resonates deeply today. Coming out and living openly is the most important thing that gay, lesbian, bisexual, transgender and straight-supportive Americans can do to build lasting understanding and equality."
The HRC's got a neat page of resources on coming out, including material for all kinds of queer and straight folk ... I mean, folk.
The back of St. Robinson, my car, is full of bumper stickers, including a long rainbow stripe and a sticker reading 'Jesus didn't teach me to hate gay people' (I promise pictures, someday). It's not always the most comfortable experience to drive that vehicle through the heart of conservative territory, but I wouldn't have it any other way -- because every time I see another car with a rainbow sticker, no matter how small or discreet, it makes me smile. Judging by the thumbs-up and messages left on my windshield and people yelling encouragement across traffic at stoplights, I'd say that my car's being out has made more than a few people's days.
Once my aunt (as seen in pictures a few days ago) was planning a trip and asked me, why would all these places go out of their way to advertise that they're gay-friendly vacation spots? And I told her, it's because people like us have to be cautious of finding ourselves in gay-unfriendly vacation spots; sometimes, it's safer to assume hostile until prove otherwise. The same, sadly, usually goes for people. Of course I've had people surprise me with being unexpectedly and totally cool, but no matter how confident I appear to be about it, the pause between revelation and acceptance is always a stomach-clenching one.
Most of the queer people I know are out -- it's the straight ones I'd like to see showing more visible support! Not everyone can be out -- for one reason or another -- but at least they can be out to you. Amherst passed out these yellow diamond stickers that read BI GAY LESBIAN TRANSGENDERED SAFE ZONE, which many students of all sexual orientations and gender identities put on their doors. The key word, I always felt, was safe. Tolerance, acceptance, understanding, these are all lovely things, but sometimes all you need is to know you're somewhere safe.
Come out, come out, whatever you are.