Fic: Reaching Through The Mirror (Gerard/Gerard, Frank/Gerard)
Because I'm about to be away for three days and I couldn't TAKE the idea of that shameful "First Fic" meme sitting at the top of my LJ the whole time. Have some fic!
Fandom: Bandom - MCR
Title: Reaching Through The Mirror
Pairing: Gerard/Gerard, Frank/Gerard
Rating: NC-17
Length: 5 800 words
Warnings: Porn and weirdness
A/N: I don't even know where this came from. I have so many other fics I'm supposed to be writing. Obviously I should stay away from anon_lovefest. (Original post here.)
Summary: Danger Days Gerard and Basement Gerard get it on. (I never promised it would make sense.)
ETA - there is now a podfic available by the amazing knight_tracer over here
Reaching Through The Mirror
"I don't understand."
Gerard reaches a hand out. His ink stained fingers and chipped black nail polish look alien as he traces the line of the pale cheek of the man in front of him. The man who looks so much like him but not like him. It's like looking in a mirror, some kind of enchanted mirror, a mirror of what could be. His fingers tangle in scarlet hair, skate over red dye staining a slender neck.
He's beautiful, but he's also...
"You're me." Gerard says, unable to mask the confusion in his voice.
"No, you're me." The red-haired Gerard says, grinning at Gerard with tiny crooked teeth, Gerard's teeth.
"How does it work? I mean, how old are you? Where have you been? What can you tell me?" The questions come thick and fast and Gerard can't stop touching, his hands skimming down dusty clothes, colourful leather, paint-stained cloth, a thigh holster. A thigh holster holding a - a ray gun? "Shit, does this work?"
He's reaching for the yellow gun immediately, until the red haired Gerard slaps his hand away, "Don't touch that, you'll blow a hole in yourself."
Gerard tries not to sulk, but really? It's a fucking ray gun. Come on. "What is the point of letting me see you if you're not gonna tell me anything?" He shoves his hands on his hips, and yes, okay, so maybe he pouts. He's still not convinced he hasn't dreamed this whole thing. I mean there's a scarlet haired version of himself in motorcycle leathers standing in his basement. Looking way too colourful among all Gerard's black, black and more black. It's a stark contrast to Gerard's Hello Kitty pajama bottoms and threadbare Nightmare t-shirt that probably hasn't been washed this calendar year.
"Look, I can't give too much away, because you might, you know, change things, and like, that would be bad. Butterfly effect and all that shit." The red-haired Gerard flaps a hand airily and god, does Gerard look like that when he does that? He shouldn't do that anymore.
"Okay, so why come back at all?" Gerard folds his arms across his chest and maybe glares a little. Because - questions. He has so many.
"So maybe I lost a bet."
Gerard arches an eyebrow at his so-called future self. "That's the shittiest reason for going back in time I've ever heard."
The red-haired Gerard runs a hand through his hair distractedly. It makes it stick up all crazy. He's looking more like Gerard every second.
There's a soft staticky noise. Gerard might not have heard it at all, except for how it makes the red-haired Gerard's hand fly to his ear and his brow furrow. "Yes, Ghoul. Yes I fucking hear you. Thirty minutes. Fuck okay, I'm fucking - yes." He drops his hand, shaking his head and adding, "Asshole," in a whisper. A moment later, his head twitches to the side and he says, "I don't care if you fucking heard! You are."
"Who are you talking to?" Gerard asks, voice coming out high pitched and whiny and he doesn't care.
"No one. Nothing. Just." Red-haired Gerard flaps a distracted hand at Gerard. He looks really, really annoyed. He gropes in his back pocket, which - fuck, leather pants man - will Gerard ever look that good in leather? Because fuck, that's hot. He needs to like, work out more, or whatever, if he could look like that.
It takes Gerard a moment to focus on what it is that the other Gerard pulls out of the pocket of his way-too-tight leather pants. It's sort of, filmy and transparent, like it's made up of tiny panes of glass. It's vaguely... box-shaped? No, camera shaped. The red-haired Gerard twists it in a way that makes it make a small humming noise and then lets go of it, in mid-air. It doesn't drop to the floor like Gerard expects it to. It just hovers, and then it starts to swim through the air towards Gerard's face. Gerard fights the urge to duck out of its way. It hovers in front of Gerard's nose and he stares at it, trying to make out what it is as it makes tiny shutter-sounding noises.
"Is that a - a camera?" He reaches a finger out to it, but the red-haired Gerard grabs his hand out of the way.
"Yeah. Look, just, don't touch it. Try to pretend it's not there." The dusty, leather-clad Gerard sounds really fucking annoyed now and Gerard kind of wants to point out that he hasn't done anything wrong here. He was just minding his own business trying to work up the urge to get out of bed when crazy leather wearing red-haired future-him decided to bust in and start making obnoxious demands.
He decides not to pick a fight, though. Not yet. "Um. Okay?" He's less than impressed with just how unsure his voice comes out sounding.
The red-haired Gerard looks at him. He looks... apologetic, actually. "Hey look, this isn't really going to make any sense at all. I'm sorry. Just, try to go with it?" He grins at Gerard then, and there's enough uncertainty in his smile that Gerard could be looking in a mirror. It's both unnerving and familiar enough to be a comfort.
Gerard returns the smile, a little shakily and it makes the other Gerard's smile a little warmer. Right up until the moment the smile drops from his mouth altogether. His face falls into a look of concentration and he brings a dusty hand up to cup Gerard's cheek. His fingers are warm and Gerard can't help but tilt his face into the touch. It's weird, sure, but also nice. It's been a long time since anyone's touched Gerard this gently. And maybe it's narcissistic of him to think so, but this red-haired future self of his is really pretty to look at.
Gerard hasn't gotten past that thought when the hand on his cheek firms a little and the next thing he knows, the red-haired Gerard is leaning in and kissing him. And that's just. Wow. That's fucking weird. But also, kind of... hot. Future Gerard is like, a fucking good kisser. Not too soft, not too rough. He's sucking on Gerard's mouth, licking gently at his lips and just - going for it.
Gerard's a little too startled to kiss back at first, but then he remembers the command to just "go with it" and so he tries to force his brain to disengage and just get into it. This has got to be some sort of really intense, really weird wet dream. Surely. He'll wake up and tell Mikey all about it. Except maybe he'll leave out the kissing part.
Or maybe he won't, because the kissing part is kind of extremely awesome. Gerard gets enough control of himself to relax his mouth and kiss back and then the other Gerard is licking into his mouth, finding his tongue and then, holy shit, sucking on it and it's so hot that Gerard can feel his knees getting wobbly. He grabs at the other Gerard's shoulder, his fingers tightening on dusty leather and it gives him enough balance that he doesn't fall over. Yet.
It helps when a warm, dusty hand worms its way around Gerard's back, pulling him close until he's pressed all up against future Gerard's body. And it feels fucking nice. The kissing and the warmth of another body pressed against his. Scarlet-haired Gerard's leathers creak a little whenever they move, and he tastes like dust and cigarettes and it's so nice and so hot that Gerard can't even think. He just kisses back, giving more lips, more tongue, writhing a little up against the firm hard body he's pressed against.
He has to come up for air eventually, he's too gone to remember to breathe properly. When their lips part, red-haired Gerard's watching him, his eyes considering, his mouth wet and soft. He pats a hand through Gerard's long and not-at-all-washed hair, the movement awkward, but Gerard knows it's meant to be comforting. His breathing is just as uneven as Gerard's.
They're like that for a long moment, drawing breath in the silence, until Gerard hears a soft crackle of static and what sounds like a voice saying "Fuck yeah" with more than a little awe.
"Who is that?" Gerard asks, because he's figuring the voice in the earpiece has got to be another future dweller.
"No one. Look. Don't worry about it. Just." The red-haired Gerard shakes his head, trailing fingers through Gerard's hair in a calming way. "Can we just...?" His eyes are huge, like he's asking for a big favour.
Gerard's not sure what part of making out with his future self is supposed to be a chore, but he shrugs at the other Gerard. "Um, sure?" It beats inking, anyway.
"Yeah?" Apparently despite the cool clothes and hair, his future self is just as unsure as his current self.
"Yeah." Gerard nods, swallowing a little and forcing his hand to slide from future Gerard's shoulder up to cup his neck. He only has to put a tiny bit of pressure behind the motion before red-haired Gerard is leaning in again, and Gerard meets him halfway, kissing him wet and eager.
It gets hotter from there. Soon there's a leather clad leg pushing between Gerard's thighs and Gerard's rubbing off on it before he's even processed the movement. Dusty fingers thread up under Gerard's t-shirt, dancing over his back, tickling lightly up his sides until Gerard's squirming. The older, firmer, thinner Gerard keeps kissing Gerard like he can't help himself. Like he's the best thing he's tasted. Like he can't get enough.
Gerard's so lightheaded he's wondering if he might just tip over when firm hands start ushering him backwards. He lets himself be guided, taking halting steps back until he can feel the edge of his bed pressing at his calves. Fuck. A bed. This is getting serious.
Their bodies tumble back onto the mattress, Gerard landing softly, then getting a lapful of leatherclad Gerard climbing not-so-gracefully on top of him.
"Shit, are we really?" The words escape Gerard's mouth between kisses. His fingers grip the sheets. The weight of the other Gerard on top of him is heavy and delicious. It's kind of intense.
"Yeah, we're really. We're really gonna-" Future Gerard can barely get the words out. He's got a furrow of concentration between his brows and his mouth is wet and swollen from kissing. Gerard can't believe he'll ever look this sexy. Red-haired Gerard squirms in his lap, eyes falling shut as he grinds down on Gerard and goddamn. How is that so hot?
So Gerard sometimes jerks off in front of a mirror. So what? Doesn't everyone? Something about seeing his own face - except not his face - older, thinner, prettier - making sex faces at him, sitting in his lap reminds him of that, except this is so much hotter. He starts tugging at the other Gerard's leathers. Fuck he wants to see what's underneath the clothes. He wants everything. It doesn't matter how fucking freaky that is.
Red-haired Gerard figures it out pretty fast. He starts peel off the leathers. It's not as easy as it looks. He manages to get the jacket off, and all he's got on under that is a black shirt with the sleeves cut off. In fact the sleeve holes are so huge Gerard immediately reaches his hands into them to skate his fingers over the other Gerard's chest, shoulders, back. The skin under his fingers is smooth and warm and Gerard can't touch enough of it.
His fingers fall onto the buckle of the red-haired Gerard's belt, and immediately there's a second pair of hands covering his, helping him unbuckle it, undoing the button and zip of his pants. Red-haired Gerard peers up at Gerard through swaying locks of scarlet hair and smiles, a tiny secret smile. It makes Gerard's heart shudder in his chest. How is this his life?
When the leather pants are open the sight isn't exactly unfamiliar. Gerard knows what his own dick looks like, hard and straining from a nest of dark curls. Reaching down to touch it is like reaching through the mirror to touch his reflection. He firms his fingers around his future cock and it's weird, yeah, but also fucking hot. Hot and firm in his hand as he starts to stroke a little. He peers between his own messy black locks and the red tangles of his future self's hair to see the grimace of pleasure on his other face.
"Yeah, you like that." He twists his hand a little, in that good way, and red-haired Gerard's eyes fall shut. He bucks into Gerard's hand, his body heaving, totally at Gerard's mercy. The reaction burns up Gerard from the inside. He feels like a fucking sex god.
"Yeah." Future Gerard agrees. He keeps writhing in Gerard's lap. It's rubbing Gerard in all the right ways. "Fuck yeah." He's so undone. It's so sexy.
Gerard can't help smiling, knowing it's a fucking goofy-ass stupid smile but, god. Look, he wants to say. Look what I can do.
The other Gerard keeps rolling in his lap, pressing himself into Gerard's hands, even as his own start to tug at Gerard's clothes. Gerard isn't exactly ecstatic at the idea of undressing. This other version of himself is definitely in better shape than he is. There's firm, warm muscles under Gerard's hands and those leather pants left nothing to the imagination - he's lithe. He's fit. But Gerard doesn't really have a free hand to fight it when future Gerard drags Gerard's battered t-shirt over his head, revealing his pudgy middle and the crease mark on his stomach.
Gerard tries not to wince, or to lose his rhythm, because as long as he's keeping his future self distracted it's less likely he'll notice he's getting it on with a lardass. Red-haired Gerard is still rocking his hips into Gerard's hand, rolling with the movement, making soft noises in the back of his throat. It's almost hypnotic to watch. He raises his hands to rest warm palms on Gerard's shoulders, skating his hands downwards, over the soft pale flesh, creeping under the waistband of Gerard's pajama pants.
Gerard sucks in a shocked noise when the other Gerard's hands find his dick. His hands are warm as he shapes his fingers around Gerard's insistent erection and Gerard makes a really fucking embarrassing noise the first time his fingers tighten around him. God, it's been so long since he's felt someone else's hands on him. Except this isn't exactly someone else's hands on him. What a head fuck.
His eyelids flutter for a long moment and when he opens his eyes again he's looking into an identical set of eyes looking back at him. "Stop thinking so much." His other self tells him.
"Easy for you to say."
"Shut up and tell me where you keep the lube."
Gerard wants to make a crack about how is supposed to tell about the lube if he's supposed to shut up, but his mind can't really make it past, "Lube?"
"Yes, lube." Red-haired Gerard isn't smiling, but his eyes are.
Gerard points mutely at the bedside table and the other Gerard leans awkwardly sideways, his shoulder crushing into Gerard's windpipe as he gets the drawer open and gropes inside it. He makes a triumphant noise and then he's back in Gerard's face.
Gerard's having trouble breathing. "Lube. So. We're, um. We're going to."
"Yes." The other Gerard says, sound very, very sure. Then he kisses Gerard, hard and enthusiastic. So hard there isn't room for any more thoughts. Gerard just lets himself get pressed onto his back on the bed, his other self's body a warm weight over him as they make out and the other Gerard starts to tug his pants down. And there is a flash of panic when he can feel air all over his skin because he's naked now. Even the other Gerard isn't naked, his leathers wouldn't go any further than his thighs and he's still wearing that gapey black singlet thing. Somehow Gerard has trouble holding onto his panic when the other Gerard keeps kissing him, though. The kissing is seriously awesome.
Then the other Gerard's hands are on Gerard's ass, gripping firmly before his fingers slide between his cheeks to stroke as his hole. Gerard has to break the kiss and draw in a shaky breath. Fuck, it's been a long time. Blood is racing through every limb. He's excited and frightened and so, so turned on.
"Oh god." He breathes, when slick fingers start running around his opening.
"Yeah." Red-haired Gerard agrees, grinning at Gerard through the messy strands of his hair. "You're gonna like this."
Gerard makes a noise that sounds like a dying bird and then tries really hard to pretend that he didn't. The other Gerard giggles - yes, giggles - then proceeds to drive Gerard completely out of his mind by teasing around Gerard's hole with one finger while stroking Gerard's dick with his other hand. The combination of sensation is fucking amazing. Gerard likes to do this to himself, but he doesn't have the willpower or concentration to do it this well and he knows he's turning into a whimpering pile of goo the longer the other Gerard does it. He really doesn't care much, though. As long as it continues.
"You ready?" The other Gerard is grinning down at Gerard, and before Gerard has assembled enough brain cells to answer, there's a gentle finger working its way into Gerard's ass.
Gerard makes a strangled noise that's somewhere between "yes" and "holyfuckingshitballs" and he's pushing down on the other Gerard's hand with his ass before he's even realized it. Oh shit yes. Oh yes. This is the best day of his entire life.
Then the other Gerard adds another finger and starts kissing him, slow and sensuous with lots of tongue as he gently twists his fingers in Gerard's ass and the added stretch is mindblowing. Gerard loves his mouth. Really. He's going to write poetry about this crazy red-headed version of himself's mouth. Totally. Just as soon as he has the use of his limbs back.
It's a disappointing loss when the other Gerard's fingers slip from Gerard's ass. But then he's gently pressing Gerard's legs apart, up and back, pushing with his shoulder and hands. And Gerard knows where this is going. And there's no way he's fighting it. He goes liquid in the other Gerard's hands, lets himself be opened up. Readied.
When he can open his eyes again, his future self is looking down at him. His body is a warm weight all over Gerard's front and it feels wonderful. His eyes are dark and he's breathing hard, lips hovering above Gerard's. "You okay?" he whispers.
"Yeah, yeah I'm. I'm fucking peachy." Gerard breathes, and tries to smile. It's nearly a grimace.
"You're cool if we...?" This is the most uncertain Gerard's seen his future self look since he got here. It's unnerving but also kind of endearing.
"You're asking me now?" Gerard can't help asking, because seriously, he's so fucking open for the taking and red-haired Gerard's dick is like, right there.
"Well, it was all a little, like sudden."
Gerard can hear the staticky tremble of words from future Gerard's headpiece but he can't make them out. Future Gerard grimaces, closing his eyes and whispering, "Oh my god, shut up. I can't do this if you keep talking, I swear." He opens his eyes and his expression softens when his eyes land on Gerard's. "Not you," He says, apologetically. "You can talk all you want. Promise. It's just this-" He flails a finger towards the nearly-invisible earpiece, "It's a little-"
"Yeah, I bet it is." Gerard cuts him off, giving him a small smile. He considers suggesting taking out the earpiece, but doesn't manage to form the words.
"Hey." The other Gerard says, his voice soft and a little unsure.
"Hey." Gerard says back, and smiles. Then he reaches up to slide his fingers into scarlet hair and pull the other Gerard's head down for a kiss. He can feel the smile against his lips a moment before the kiss gets serious. Then his mouth is being devoured and he's kissing back for all his worth, giving tongue, lips, teeth. His hands slide over every bare patch of skin he can find. He can feel the other Gerard's cock there, at his ass, the tip rubbing lightly at his hole, but not pushing.
Gerard groans between their lips and reaches down between their bodies to find the other Gerard's dick (his dick, oh my god) and wrapping his fingers around it. He guides it in, until the cockhead is pressing at his hole. And fuck, he's ready. He's so fucking ready.
He breaks the kiss long enough to say, "Yeah" and then he's pressing his ass down on the other Gerard's cock and fuck, his future self's pushing in, slow but sure and fucking fuck it's amazing. He doesn't stop until he's all the way in and Gerard is so full. It feels incredible.
"Gee?" It's the first time the other Gerard's used his name, and it feels weird, but soft and familiar and so warm.
"Please." It's the only word in Gerard's mind. It comes out thready and strained.
"Please what?" The other Gerard whispers, a tiny smile tugging on his lip and oh god he's an asshole for making him say it.
Gerard knows what he wants to hear and he gives it to him. "Move. Please. Fuck me."
It's worth it for the way the other Gerard's eyes darken, the way he immediately latches his mouth to Gerard's, kissing him hard as his hips start to push. As he starts to fuck Gerard through the mattress.
Every push feels like it's unraveling Gerard's spine. It starts slow and picks up until Gerard feels like he can barely catch a breath. He buries his hands in the other Gerard's scarlet hair, kissing him with everything he's got and taking every thrust and pushing back for more. Soon they're both panting into each other's mouths, Gerard squirming under the firm body over him, every thrust bringing him closer.
He gropes between their bodies to grab his own dick, because it feels like he might die if he doesn't touch himself, but the other Gerard beats him there. His fingers feel almost as good as his cock and he strokes in time with his thrusts, getting faster, getting harder, until Gerard's groaning, mewling and shuddering beneath him.
"Yes." The other Gerard pants against his mouth, eyes wild, hair stuck to his face with sweat. "Yes, that's it. Come apart. Come for me."
It's all it takes. Gerard groans long and loud as the orgasm hits him and he shoots between their bodies and the other Gerard's skilful fingers. His eyelids flutter and his hips jump, a whole body spasm. It feels amazing. When he can pry his eyes open, the other Gerard is grinning down at him, so wicked. Then he keeps fucking Gerard, harder, faster, and Gerard takes it, letting the motions push the air from his lungs until he feels the orgasm shaking in the body above him.
"Come on." He whispers, wanting to feel it, and the other Gerard does. His mouth falls open and his eyes crease shut as his whole body stiffens and Gerard feels it, feels it in the pulse in his ass and the buck of the other Gerard's hips against his. He sees it crash over his own face, older, prettier, but his and the way he looks at his moment of release is almost beatific.
He doesn't stop staring for a long time, committing it memory, the passionate perfection of that face over his. He tangles a hand in scarlet hair, presses fingers to a warm cheek. "You're beautiful." He whispers.
The other Gerard's eyelids come open, familiar eyes looking down at him. "You are." His smile is soft, almost fragile.
"Okay." Gerard says, surprised at how easily he agrees.
The other Gerard smiles down at him. "Okay." He leans down and kisses Gerard, soft and sweet and long.
When they finally come up for air, the future Gerard rolls off Gerard onto his back, pulling Gerard onto his chest. Gerard's heartbeat still hasn't returned to normal. He lies on the bed, the familiar scents of the basement mixing with the unfamiliar scents of dust and leather.
It's silent, but for their breathing, and eventually the burst of soft static.
"You can't stay, can you?" Gerard asks it as a question, even though he's sure he knows the answer.
"I have less than five minutes." The other Gerard answers softly, before turning his head away a little, whispering, "Fuck Ghoul, shut up."
Gerard doesn't bother to ask about the voice on the end of the line again. He's knows he's not allowed to know. "Will I see you again?" He hates how unsure his voice sounds.
"Oh hell yeah." The other Gerard turns his head back to look at Gerard and he's grinning. "On the other side of the mirror."
"Oh god," Gerard rolls his eyes and swats at the other Gerard until they're both laughing. "Be more corny, can you?" They giggle like schoolboys until the nervous laughter has finished bubbling out of them. Then the other Gerard starts wiggling on the bed, and Gerard realizes he's pulling his leathers back on.
He's really going. Gerard sits up, tugging a sheet around him, feeling suddenly vulnerable in his nudity. The other Gerard shrugs into his jacket and Gerard finds himself reaching up to touch the "Dead Pegasus" insignia on the arm. Fuck, he has so many questions.
"I can't ask anything, can I? Can you tell me anything?" He begs, chewing hard on his lower lip.
The other Gerard sits down heavily beside him on the bed. He runs a hand through his red hair, brow furrowed in thought. "Look." He says, "I guess you should just know, it gets better. So much better. So don't-" He cuts himself off and Gerard wants to scream. Wants to ask what? already. The other Gerard's eyes find his again, "Just hang in there."
"Okay." Gerard knows he's frowning, but he can't help it. "Anything else?"
The other Gerard's expression softens. He looks like he's trying hard to decide on something, like he's not sure if he should say it.
"Say it." Gerard says.
"Okay, look." The other Gerard's hand is warm on Gerard shoulder suddenly and he's looking very seriously at him. "One day, you might like, get inspired to you know, create something, like, to write a song."
"A song?"
"Or something." The other Gerard shakes his head and Gerard can hear the little staticky earpiece voice shouting now. It doesn't sound happy. "I'm just saying if you feel that urge, you should totally do it. Totally."
"Um. Okay." Gerard feels even more confused than he did before, but the future version of himself is smiling at him and his hand on Gerard' shoulder is gripping firm and warm and solid. So despite the confusion, he feels pretty good.
"Okay. I'm..." The other Gerard checks his watch. "I'm nearly out." He smiles again and Gerard is having a hard time remembering that's his own smile that he's looking at. "It was cool meeting you Gerard. Just." He shakes his head and smiles again. "Yeah." He leans in then, quickly, kissing Gerard hard with soft lips and Gerard has just enough time to melt into it before the air around him shimmers and he's kissing air.
He pries his eyes open and stares at his empty room. He licks his lips. He can still taste dust and cigarettes. He raises his hand to his face.
"Well, fuck me." He says, wonderingly, flexing his fingers and staring at the streak of scarlet dye on the back of his hand.
Epilogue
Despite every effort to stay upright, as usual, Gerard winds up on his ass on re-entry, as usual.
"I swear you do that on purpose. How hard would it really be to land me somewhere soft?" Gerard says, his voice coming out high pitched and annoyed. He shifts. There's something underneath him. Something hard and... pointy. Oh great, it's car parts, now that's fucking comfortable. "I think I broke something." He moans, rubbing at his bruised ass.
"I hope it wasn't Star's spark plugs, it took him weeks to find those." Frank's voice is a little muffled and a lot uncaring. He peers up at Gerard over the screen of his Frankenputer. Gerard can't see past his nose, but he can tell he's smiling. Fucker.
"Thanks for your concern. Nice to know you care." Gerard's leathers creak as he struggles to his feet. He brushes off his ass, the motions completely ineffectual against the ever present dust. God it was nice to be somewhere dust free, even for a little while. He licks his lips, tasting cigarettes, the old kind, the good kind. And Diet Coke, just the tiniest trace still lingering on his mouth.
"We need to figure out how to bring things back." He mutters, scratching a hand through his hair. "Food, coffee, cigarettes..." He trails off, considering. It's easier to concentrate on practicalities than to think about what just happened. He doesn't have a lot of luck with the distraction though, he can already hear his own voice and his other voice, the old him - or is it the young him? - on playback, leaking from the tinny hotwired speakers of the Frankenputer.
He walks up behind Frank and leans down to peer over his shoulder. Sure enough, crammed into a window on the display is video playback of his encounter with himself. Frank can't seem to take his eyes off the grainy image on the screen - the younger and older Gerard's kissing, their eyes closed, expressions mirrored, black hair and scarlet hair tangling. It's so weird to see himself like this. The view twists something in his chest and he can't tell if it's embarrassment or arousal. Possibly a little of both.
Frank slides a warm hand onto Gerard's neck without taking his eyes off the screen. Gerard can't help it, he leans into the touch.
"So fucking hot." Frank whispers, leaning back into Gerard, his back to Gerard's chest. Gerard silently agrees.
"Star's gonna ghost us both when he finds out we did this."
"What's the point in stealing tech if we can't use it for cool shit?" It's Frank's eternal argument. "Besides, I'm not telling him." Frank finally manages to tear his eyes from the screen, turning his head to look at Gerard, one perfect eyebrow arched. "Are you?"
"Fuck no."
"So, no problem then." Frank grins wide, flashing white teeth and fuck if that smile isn't what got Gerard into trouble in the first place. One day he'll learn to say no.
Of course, Gerard doesn't point out that if Ray doesn't figure it out, Mikey will. They're living in too close quarters to have secrets anymore. There's plenty of time to worry about that later. For now he lets his eyes slide shut as Frank increases the pressure on the back of Gerard's neck and captures his mouth in a kiss that's hot and demanding. Gerard can't help the whine that leaks between their lips, kissing back and trying not to think about how different Frank's kissing technique is to his own, how he kisses harder and bites more. Wow, that is clearly not working.
Frank pulls back, separating their mouths with a wet noise and whispering hotly, "We've got at least an hour before Kobra and Star get back. We are so watching this." Frank's grin is huge and the way he's squirming up against Gerard is getting Gerard going again already, cutting through his post orgasmic stupor and getting him way too hot in his leathers. Fuck, Gerard still can't say no.
"Um. Okay." He breathes, feeling an answering smile tug at his lips.
"Awesome." Frank bounces on his feet, grabbing the Frankenputer with one hand and Gerard's wrist with the other and dragging him toward the pile of blankets that serves as a bed. He's got the video cued and his chest pressed up against Gerard's back before he's even had a chance to take a breath.
"I should never bet against you. You always win." Gerard sighs, leaning back into Frank's warmth.
Frank's fingers are warm and heavy over the fly of Gerard's pants. He presses a kiss to the back of Gerard's neck. "Double or nothing?"
"What?" Gerard's body seizes at the question. He turns around slowly to find Frank's mouth stretched into a wicked smile.
"You know you want to watch me go fuck myself. One more round. You lose again, you go again, I choose the year. You win and I'll go, you pick the year. And you get to watch."
Gerard tries to speak but he ends up just moving his mouth open and closed. Because damn, that's a mental image right there. "Um, what?" He finally manages.
Frank tugs on one of Gerard's scarlet locks, his breath ghosting warm over Gerard's lips. "I liked your short blond period. That'd be hot. Was your hair long enough to pull? I want to see that."
Gerard has to swallow hard. His mouth has gone dry. His mind is swimming with possibilities. He stutters a few times, stumbling over his own tongue before he gets the words out. "2005."
Frank blinks back at him. Then he's grinning again. "2005." He repeats.
"Yeah." Gerard grins back at him, feathering a hand through Frank's long hair. "The Mohawk."
"Huh." Frank's eyes narrow at Gerard a little, then he's grinning again. "You're so fucking hot for me."
"Shut up." Gerard says, but there's no venom in it. He kisses Frank hard, then pulls back, cupping his face, fingertips brushing over Frank's cheekbones, browner now than they used to be. "You should do it after a show, so you're still in your makeup. That'd be hot."
Frank tries to hide it, but his grin gets wider. "You know, you haven't won yet."
Gerard turns to face the display screen again. "Just hit play, asshole."
(end)
I wrote a sequel to this that turned into my 2011 bandombigbang fic: James Cameron Got It Wrong if you're interested.
(Gerard won.)
Fandom: Bandom - MCR
Title: Reaching Through The Mirror
Pairing: Gerard/Gerard, Frank/Gerard
Rating: NC-17
Length: 5 800 words
Warnings: Porn and weirdness
A/N: I don't even know where this came from. I have so many other fics I'm supposed to be writing. Obviously I should stay away from anon_lovefest. (Original post here.)
Summary: Danger Days Gerard and Basement Gerard get it on. (I never promised it would make sense.)
ETA - there is now a podfic available by the amazing knight_tracer over here
Reaching Through The Mirror
"I don't understand."
Gerard reaches a hand out. His ink stained fingers and chipped black nail polish look alien as he traces the line of the pale cheek of the man in front of him. The man who looks so much like him but not like him. It's like looking in a mirror, some kind of enchanted mirror, a mirror of what could be. His fingers tangle in scarlet hair, skate over red dye staining a slender neck.
He's beautiful, but he's also...
"You're me." Gerard says, unable to mask the confusion in his voice.
"No, you're me." The red-haired Gerard says, grinning at Gerard with tiny crooked teeth, Gerard's teeth.
"How does it work? I mean, how old are you? Where have you been? What can you tell me?" The questions come thick and fast and Gerard can't stop touching, his hands skimming down dusty clothes, colourful leather, paint-stained cloth, a thigh holster. A thigh holster holding a - a ray gun? "Shit, does this work?"
He's reaching for the yellow gun immediately, until the red haired Gerard slaps his hand away, "Don't touch that, you'll blow a hole in yourself."
Gerard tries not to sulk, but really? It's a fucking ray gun. Come on. "What is the point of letting me see you if you're not gonna tell me anything?" He shoves his hands on his hips, and yes, okay, so maybe he pouts. He's still not convinced he hasn't dreamed this whole thing. I mean there's a scarlet haired version of himself in motorcycle leathers standing in his basement. Looking way too colourful among all Gerard's black, black and more black. It's a stark contrast to Gerard's Hello Kitty pajama bottoms and threadbare Nightmare t-shirt that probably hasn't been washed this calendar year.
"Look, I can't give too much away, because you might, you know, change things, and like, that would be bad. Butterfly effect and all that shit." The red-haired Gerard flaps a hand airily and god, does Gerard look like that when he does that? He shouldn't do that anymore.
"Okay, so why come back at all?" Gerard folds his arms across his chest and maybe glares a little. Because - questions. He has so many.
"So maybe I lost a bet."
Gerard arches an eyebrow at his so-called future self. "That's the shittiest reason for going back in time I've ever heard."
The red-haired Gerard runs a hand through his hair distractedly. It makes it stick up all crazy. He's looking more like Gerard every second.
There's a soft staticky noise. Gerard might not have heard it at all, except for how it makes the red-haired Gerard's hand fly to his ear and his brow furrow. "Yes, Ghoul. Yes I fucking hear you. Thirty minutes. Fuck okay, I'm fucking - yes." He drops his hand, shaking his head and adding, "Asshole," in a whisper. A moment later, his head twitches to the side and he says, "I don't care if you fucking heard! You are."
"Who are you talking to?" Gerard asks, voice coming out high pitched and whiny and he doesn't care.
"No one. Nothing. Just." Red-haired Gerard flaps a distracted hand at Gerard. He looks really, really annoyed. He gropes in his back pocket, which - fuck, leather pants man - will Gerard ever look that good in leather? Because fuck, that's hot. He needs to like, work out more, or whatever, if he could look like that.
It takes Gerard a moment to focus on what it is that the other Gerard pulls out of the pocket of his way-too-tight leather pants. It's sort of, filmy and transparent, like it's made up of tiny panes of glass. It's vaguely... box-shaped? No, camera shaped. The red-haired Gerard twists it in a way that makes it make a small humming noise and then lets go of it, in mid-air. It doesn't drop to the floor like Gerard expects it to. It just hovers, and then it starts to swim through the air towards Gerard's face. Gerard fights the urge to duck out of its way. It hovers in front of Gerard's nose and he stares at it, trying to make out what it is as it makes tiny shutter-sounding noises.
"Is that a - a camera?" He reaches a finger out to it, but the red-haired Gerard grabs his hand out of the way.
"Yeah. Look, just, don't touch it. Try to pretend it's not there." The dusty, leather-clad Gerard sounds really fucking annoyed now and Gerard kind of wants to point out that he hasn't done anything wrong here. He was just minding his own business trying to work up the urge to get out of bed when crazy leather wearing red-haired future-him decided to bust in and start making obnoxious demands.
He decides not to pick a fight, though. Not yet. "Um. Okay?" He's less than impressed with just how unsure his voice comes out sounding.
The red-haired Gerard looks at him. He looks... apologetic, actually. "Hey look, this isn't really going to make any sense at all. I'm sorry. Just, try to go with it?" He grins at Gerard then, and there's enough uncertainty in his smile that Gerard could be looking in a mirror. It's both unnerving and familiar enough to be a comfort.
Gerard returns the smile, a little shakily and it makes the other Gerard's smile a little warmer. Right up until the moment the smile drops from his mouth altogether. His face falls into a look of concentration and he brings a dusty hand up to cup Gerard's cheek. His fingers are warm and Gerard can't help but tilt his face into the touch. It's weird, sure, but also nice. It's been a long time since anyone's touched Gerard this gently. And maybe it's narcissistic of him to think so, but this red-haired future self of his is really pretty to look at.
Gerard hasn't gotten past that thought when the hand on his cheek firms a little and the next thing he knows, the red-haired Gerard is leaning in and kissing him. And that's just. Wow. That's fucking weird. But also, kind of... hot. Future Gerard is like, a fucking good kisser. Not too soft, not too rough. He's sucking on Gerard's mouth, licking gently at his lips and just - going for it.
Gerard's a little too startled to kiss back at first, but then he remembers the command to just "go with it" and so he tries to force his brain to disengage and just get into it. This has got to be some sort of really intense, really weird wet dream. Surely. He'll wake up and tell Mikey all about it. Except maybe he'll leave out the kissing part.
Or maybe he won't, because the kissing part is kind of extremely awesome. Gerard gets enough control of himself to relax his mouth and kiss back and then the other Gerard is licking into his mouth, finding his tongue and then, holy shit, sucking on it and it's so hot that Gerard can feel his knees getting wobbly. He grabs at the other Gerard's shoulder, his fingers tightening on dusty leather and it gives him enough balance that he doesn't fall over. Yet.
It helps when a warm, dusty hand worms its way around Gerard's back, pulling him close until he's pressed all up against future Gerard's body. And it feels fucking nice. The kissing and the warmth of another body pressed against his. Scarlet-haired Gerard's leathers creak a little whenever they move, and he tastes like dust and cigarettes and it's so nice and so hot that Gerard can't even think. He just kisses back, giving more lips, more tongue, writhing a little up against the firm hard body he's pressed against.
He has to come up for air eventually, he's too gone to remember to breathe properly. When their lips part, red-haired Gerard's watching him, his eyes considering, his mouth wet and soft. He pats a hand through Gerard's long and not-at-all-washed hair, the movement awkward, but Gerard knows it's meant to be comforting. His breathing is just as uneven as Gerard's.
They're like that for a long moment, drawing breath in the silence, until Gerard hears a soft crackle of static and what sounds like a voice saying "Fuck yeah" with more than a little awe.
"Who is that?" Gerard asks, because he's figuring the voice in the earpiece has got to be another future dweller.
"No one. Look. Don't worry about it. Just." The red-haired Gerard shakes his head, trailing fingers through Gerard's hair in a calming way. "Can we just...?" His eyes are huge, like he's asking for a big favour.
Gerard's not sure what part of making out with his future self is supposed to be a chore, but he shrugs at the other Gerard. "Um, sure?" It beats inking, anyway.
"Yeah?" Apparently despite the cool clothes and hair, his future self is just as unsure as his current self.
"Yeah." Gerard nods, swallowing a little and forcing his hand to slide from future Gerard's shoulder up to cup his neck. He only has to put a tiny bit of pressure behind the motion before red-haired Gerard is leaning in again, and Gerard meets him halfway, kissing him wet and eager.
It gets hotter from there. Soon there's a leather clad leg pushing between Gerard's thighs and Gerard's rubbing off on it before he's even processed the movement. Dusty fingers thread up under Gerard's t-shirt, dancing over his back, tickling lightly up his sides until Gerard's squirming. The older, firmer, thinner Gerard keeps kissing Gerard like he can't help himself. Like he's the best thing he's tasted. Like he can't get enough.
Gerard's so lightheaded he's wondering if he might just tip over when firm hands start ushering him backwards. He lets himself be guided, taking halting steps back until he can feel the edge of his bed pressing at his calves. Fuck. A bed. This is getting serious.
Their bodies tumble back onto the mattress, Gerard landing softly, then getting a lapful of leatherclad Gerard climbing not-so-gracefully on top of him.
"Shit, are we really?" The words escape Gerard's mouth between kisses. His fingers grip the sheets. The weight of the other Gerard on top of him is heavy and delicious. It's kind of intense.
"Yeah, we're really. We're really gonna-" Future Gerard can barely get the words out. He's got a furrow of concentration between his brows and his mouth is wet and swollen from kissing. Gerard can't believe he'll ever look this sexy. Red-haired Gerard squirms in his lap, eyes falling shut as he grinds down on Gerard and goddamn. How is that so hot?
So Gerard sometimes jerks off in front of a mirror. So what? Doesn't everyone? Something about seeing his own face - except not his face - older, thinner, prettier - making sex faces at him, sitting in his lap reminds him of that, except this is so much hotter. He starts tugging at the other Gerard's leathers. Fuck he wants to see what's underneath the clothes. He wants everything. It doesn't matter how fucking freaky that is.
Red-haired Gerard figures it out pretty fast. He starts peel off the leathers. It's not as easy as it looks. He manages to get the jacket off, and all he's got on under that is a black shirt with the sleeves cut off. In fact the sleeve holes are so huge Gerard immediately reaches his hands into them to skate his fingers over the other Gerard's chest, shoulders, back. The skin under his fingers is smooth and warm and Gerard can't touch enough of it.
His fingers fall onto the buckle of the red-haired Gerard's belt, and immediately there's a second pair of hands covering his, helping him unbuckle it, undoing the button and zip of his pants. Red-haired Gerard peers up at Gerard through swaying locks of scarlet hair and smiles, a tiny secret smile. It makes Gerard's heart shudder in his chest. How is this his life?
When the leather pants are open the sight isn't exactly unfamiliar. Gerard knows what his own dick looks like, hard and straining from a nest of dark curls. Reaching down to touch it is like reaching through the mirror to touch his reflection. He firms his fingers around his future cock and it's weird, yeah, but also fucking hot. Hot and firm in his hand as he starts to stroke a little. He peers between his own messy black locks and the red tangles of his future self's hair to see the grimace of pleasure on his other face.
"Yeah, you like that." He twists his hand a little, in that good way, and red-haired Gerard's eyes fall shut. He bucks into Gerard's hand, his body heaving, totally at Gerard's mercy. The reaction burns up Gerard from the inside. He feels like a fucking sex god.
"Yeah." Future Gerard agrees. He keeps writhing in Gerard's lap. It's rubbing Gerard in all the right ways. "Fuck yeah." He's so undone. It's so sexy.
Gerard can't help smiling, knowing it's a fucking goofy-ass stupid smile but, god. Look, he wants to say. Look what I can do.
The other Gerard keeps rolling in his lap, pressing himself into Gerard's hands, even as his own start to tug at Gerard's clothes. Gerard isn't exactly ecstatic at the idea of undressing. This other version of himself is definitely in better shape than he is. There's firm, warm muscles under Gerard's hands and those leather pants left nothing to the imagination - he's lithe. He's fit. But Gerard doesn't really have a free hand to fight it when future Gerard drags Gerard's battered t-shirt over his head, revealing his pudgy middle and the crease mark on his stomach.
Gerard tries not to wince, or to lose his rhythm, because as long as he's keeping his future self distracted it's less likely he'll notice he's getting it on with a lardass. Red-haired Gerard is still rocking his hips into Gerard's hand, rolling with the movement, making soft noises in the back of his throat. It's almost hypnotic to watch. He raises his hands to rest warm palms on Gerard's shoulders, skating his hands downwards, over the soft pale flesh, creeping under the waistband of Gerard's pajama pants.
Gerard sucks in a shocked noise when the other Gerard's hands find his dick. His hands are warm as he shapes his fingers around Gerard's insistent erection and Gerard makes a really fucking embarrassing noise the first time his fingers tighten around him. God, it's been so long since he's felt someone else's hands on him. Except this isn't exactly someone else's hands on him. What a head fuck.
His eyelids flutter for a long moment and when he opens his eyes again he's looking into an identical set of eyes looking back at him. "Stop thinking so much." His other self tells him.
"Easy for you to say."
"Shut up and tell me where you keep the lube."
Gerard wants to make a crack about how is supposed to tell about the lube if he's supposed to shut up, but his mind can't really make it past, "Lube?"
"Yes, lube." Red-haired Gerard isn't smiling, but his eyes are.
Gerard points mutely at the bedside table and the other Gerard leans awkwardly sideways, his shoulder crushing into Gerard's windpipe as he gets the drawer open and gropes inside it. He makes a triumphant noise and then he's back in Gerard's face.
Gerard's having trouble breathing. "Lube. So. We're, um. We're going to."
"Yes." The other Gerard says, sound very, very sure. Then he kisses Gerard, hard and enthusiastic. So hard there isn't room for any more thoughts. Gerard just lets himself get pressed onto his back on the bed, his other self's body a warm weight over him as they make out and the other Gerard starts to tug his pants down. And there is a flash of panic when he can feel air all over his skin because he's naked now. Even the other Gerard isn't naked, his leathers wouldn't go any further than his thighs and he's still wearing that gapey black singlet thing. Somehow Gerard has trouble holding onto his panic when the other Gerard keeps kissing him, though. The kissing is seriously awesome.
Then the other Gerard's hands are on Gerard's ass, gripping firmly before his fingers slide between his cheeks to stroke as his hole. Gerard has to break the kiss and draw in a shaky breath. Fuck, it's been a long time. Blood is racing through every limb. He's excited and frightened and so, so turned on.
"Oh god." He breathes, when slick fingers start running around his opening.
"Yeah." Red-haired Gerard agrees, grinning at Gerard through the messy strands of his hair. "You're gonna like this."
Gerard makes a noise that sounds like a dying bird and then tries really hard to pretend that he didn't. The other Gerard giggles - yes, giggles - then proceeds to drive Gerard completely out of his mind by teasing around Gerard's hole with one finger while stroking Gerard's dick with his other hand. The combination of sensation is fucking amazing. Gerard likes to do this to himself, but he doesn't have the willpower or concentration to do it this well and he knows he's turning into a whimpering pile of goo the longer the other Gerard does it. He really doesn't care much, though. As long as it continues.
"You ready?" The other Gerard is grinning down at Gerard, and before Gerard has assembled enough brain cells to answer, there's a gentle finger working its way into Gerard's ass.
Gerard makes a strangled noise that's somewhere between "yes" and "holyfuckingshitballs" and he's pushing down on the other Gerard's hand with his ass before he's even realized it. Oh shit yes. Oh yes. This is the best day of his entire life.
Then the other Gerard adds another finger and starts kissing him, slow and sensuous with lots of tongue as he gently twists his fingers in Gerard's ass and the added stretch is mindblowing. Gerard loves his mouth. Really. He's going to write poetry about this crazy red-headed version of himself's mouth. Totally. Just as soon as he has the use of his limbs back.
It's a disappointing loss when the other Gerard's fingers slip from Gerard's ass. But then he's gently pressing Gerard's legs apart, up and back, pushing with his shoulder and hands. And Gerard knows where this is going. And there's no way he's fighting it. He goes liquid in the other Gerard's hands, lets himself be opened up. Readied.
When he can open his eyes again, his future self is looking down at him. His body is a warm weight all over Gerard's front and it feels wonderful. His eyes are dark and he's breathing hard, lips hovering above Gerard's. "You okay?" he whispers.
"Yeah, yeah I'm. I'm fucking peachy." Gerard breathes, and tries to smile. It's nearly a grimace.
"You're cool if we...?" This is the most uncertain Gerard's seen his future self look since he got here. It's unnerving but also kind of endearing.
"You're asking me now?" Gerard can't help asking, because seriously, he's so fucking open for the taking and red-haired Gerard's dick is like, right there.
"Well, it was all a little, like sudden."
Gerard can hear the staticky tremble of words from future Gerard's headpiece but he can't make them out. Future Gerard grimaces, closing his eyes and whispering, "Oh my god, shut up. I can't do this if you keep talking, I swear." He opens his eyes and his expression softens when his eyes land on Gerard's. "Not you," He says, apologetically. "You can talk all you want. Promise. It's just this-" He flails a finger towards the nearly-invisible earpiece, "It's a little-"
"Yeah, I bet it is." Gerard cuts him off, giving him a small smile. He considers suggesting taking out the earpiece, but doesn't manage to form the words.
"Hey." The other Gerard says, his voice soft and a little unsure.
"Hey." Gerard says back, and smiles. Then he reaches up to slide his fingers into scarlet hair and pull the other Gerard's head down for a kiss. He can feel the smile against his lips a moment before the kiss gets serious. Then his mouth is being devoured and he's kissing back for all his worth, giving tongue, lips, teeth. His hands slide over every bare patch of skin he can find. He can feel the other Gerard's cock there, at his ass, the tip rubbing lightly at his hole, but not pushing.
Gerard groans between their lips and reaches down between their bodies to find the other Gerard's dick (his dick, oh my god) and wrapping his fingers around it. He guides it in, until the cockhead is pressing at his hole. And fuck, he's ready. He's so fucking ready.
He breaks the kiss long enough to say, "Yeah" and then he's pressing his ass down on the other Gerard's cock and fuck, his future self's pushing in, slow but sure and fucking fuck it's amazing. He doesn't stop until he's all the way in and Gerard is so full. It feels incredible.
"Gee?" It's the first time the other Gerard's used his name, and it feels weird, but soft and familiar and so warm.
"Please." It's the only word in Gerard's mind. It comes out thready and strained.
"Please what?" The other Gerard whispers, a tiny smile tugging on his lip and oh god he's an asshole for making him say it.
Gerard knows what he wants to hear and he gives it to him. "Move. Please. Fuck me."
It's worth it for the way the other Gerard's eyes darken, the way he immediately latches his mouth to Gerard's, kissing him hard as his hips start to push. As he starts to fuck Gerard through the mattress.
Every push feels like it's unraveling Gerard's spine. It starts slow and picks up until Gerard feels like he can barely catch a breath. He buries his hands in the other Gerard's scarlet hair, kissing him with everything he's got and taking every thrust and pushing back for more. Soon they're both panting into each other's mouths, Gerard squirming under the firm body over him, every thrust bringing him closer.
He gropes between their bodies to grab his own dick, because it feels like he might die if he doesn't touch himself, but the other Gerard beats him there. His fingers feel almost as good as his cock and he strokes in time with his thrusts, getting faster, getting harder, until Gerard's groaning, mewling and shuddering beneath him.
"Yes." The other Gerard pants against his mouth, eyes wild, hair stuck to his face with sweat. "Yes, that's it. Come apart. Come for me."
It's all it takes. Gerard groans long and loud as the orgasm hits him and he shoots between their bodies and the other Gerard's skilful fingers. His eyelids flutter and his hips jump, a whole body spasm. It feels amazing. When he can pry his eyes open, the other Gerard is grinning down at him, so wicked. Then he keeps fucking Gerard, harder, faster, and Gerard takes it, letting the motions push the air from his lungs until he feels the orgasm shaking in the body above him.
"Come on." He whispers, wanting to feel it, and the other Gerard does. His mouth falls open and his eyes crease shut as his whole body stiffens and Gerard feels it, feels it in the pulse in his ass and the buck of the other Gerard's hips against his. He sees it crash over his own face, older, prettier, but his and the way he looks at his moment of release is almost beatific.
He doesn't stop staring for a long time, committing it memory, the passionate perfection of that face over his. He tangles a hand in scarlet hair, presses fingers to a warm cheek. "You're beautiful." He whispers.
The other Gerard's eyelids come open, familiar eyes looking down at him. "You are." His smile is soft, almost fragile.
"Okay." Gerard says, surprised at how easily he agrees.
The other Gerard smiles down at him. "Okay." He leans down and kisses Gerard, soft and sweet and long.
When they finally come up for air, the future Gerard rolls off Gerard onto his back, pulling Gerard onto his chest. Gerard's heartbeat still hasn't returned to normal. He lies on the bed, the familiar scents of the basement mixing with the unfamiliar scents of dust and leather.
It's silent, but for their breathing, and eventually the burst of soft static.
"You can't stay, can you?" Gerard asks it as a question, even though he's sure he knows the answer.
"I have less than five minutes." The other Gerard answers softly, before turning his head away a little, whispering, "Fuck Ghoul, shut up."
Gerard doesn't bother to ask about the voice on the end of the line again. He's knows he's not allowed to know. "Will I see you again?" He hates how unsure his voice sounds.
"Oh hell yeah." The other Gerard turns his head back to look at Gerard and he's grinning. "On the other side of the mirror."
"Oh god," Gerard rolls his eyes and swats at the other Gerard until they're both laughing. "Be more corny, can you?" They giggle like schoolboys until the nervous laughter has finished bubbling out of them. Then the other Gerard starts wiggling on the bed, and Gerard realizes he's pulling his leathers back on.
He's really going. Gerard sits up, tugging a sheet around him, feeling suddenly vulnerable in his nudity. The other Gerard shrugs into his jacket and Gerard finds himself reaching up to touch the "Dead Pegasus" insignia on the arm. Fuck, he has so many questions.
"I can't ask anything, can I? Can you tell me anything?" He begs, chewing hard on his lower lip.
The other Gerard sits down heavily beside him on the bed. He runs a hand through his red hair, brow furrowed in thought. "Look." He says, "I guess you should just know, it gets better. So much better. So don't-" He cuts himself off and Gerard wants to scream. Wants to ask what? already. The other Gerard's eyes find his again, "Just hang in there."
"Okay." Gerard knows he's frowning, but he can't help it. "Anything else?"
The other Gerard's expression softens. He looks like he's trying hard to decide on something, like he's not sure if he should say it.
"Say it." Gerard says.
"Okay, look." The other Gerard's hand is warm on Gerard shoulder suddenly and he's looking very seriously at him. "One day, you might like, get inspired to you know, create something, like, to write a song."
"A song?"
"Or something." The other Gerard shakes his head and Gerard can hear the little staticky earpiece voice shouting now. It doesn't sound happy. "I'm just saying if you feel that urge, you should totally do it. Totally."
"Um. Okay." Gerard feels even more confused than he did before, but the future version of himself is smiling at him and his hand on Gerard' shoulder is gripping firm and warm and solid. So despite the confusion, he feels pretty good.
"Okay. I'm..." The other Gerard checks his watch. "I'm nearly out." He smiles again and Gerard is having a hard time remembering that's his own smile that he's looking at. "It was cool meeting you Gerard. Just." He shakes his head and smiles again. "Yeah." He leans in then, quickly, kissing Gerard hard with soft lips and Gerard has just enough time to melt into it before the air around him shimmers and he's kissing air.
He pries his eyes open and stares at his empty room. He licks his lips. He can still taste dust and cigarettes. He raises his hand to his face.
"Well, fuck me." He says, wonderingly, flexing his fingers and staring at the streak of scarlet dye on the back of his hand.
Epilogue
Despite every effort to stay upright, as usual, Gerard winds up on his ass on re-entry, as usual.
"I swear you do that on purpose. How hard would it really be to land me somewhere soft?" Gerard says, his voice coming out high pitched and annoyed. He shifts. There's something underneath him. Something hard and... pointy. Oh great, it's car parts, now that's fucking comfortable. "I think I broke something." He moans, rubbing at his bruised ass.
"I hope it wasn't Star's spark plugs, it took him weeks to find those." Frank's voice is a little muffled and a lot uncaring. He peers up at Gerard over the screen of his Frankenputer. Gerard can't see past his nose, but he can tell he's smiling. Fucker.
"Thanks for your concern. Nice to know you care." Gerard's leathers creak as he struggles to his feet. He brushes off his ass, the motions completely ineffectual against the ever present dust. God it was nice to be somewhere dust free, even for a little while. He licks his lips, tasting cigarettes, the old kind, the good kind. And Diet Coke, just the tiniest trace still lingering on his mouth.
"We need to figure out how to bring things back." He mutters, scratching a hand through his hair. "Food, coffee, cigarettes..." He trails off, considering. It's easier to concentrate on practicalities than to think about what just happened. He doesn't have a lot of luck with the distraction though, he can already hear his own voice and his other voice, the old him - or is it the young him? - on playback, leaking from the tinny hotwired speakers of the Frankenputer.
He walks up behind Frank and leans down to peer over his shoulder. Sure enough, crammed into a window on the display is video playback of his encounter with himself. Frank can't seem to take his eyes off the grainy image on the screen - the younger and older Gerard's kissing, their eyes closed, expressions mirrored, black hair and scarlet hair tangling. It's so weird to see himself like this. The view twists something in his chest and he can't tell if it's embarrassment or arousal. Possibly a little of both.
Frank slides a warm hand onto Gerard's neck without taking his eyes off the screen. Gerard can't help it, he leans into the touch.
"So fucking hot." Frank whispers, leaning back into Gerard, his back to Gerard's chest. Gerard silently agrees.
"Star's gonna ghost us both when he finds out we did this."
"What's the point in stealing tech if we can't use it for cool shit?" It's Frank's eternal argument. "Besides, I'm not telling him." Frank finally manages to tear his eyes from the screen, turning his head to look at Gerard, one perfect eyebrow arched. "Are you?"
"Fuck no."
"So, no problem then." Frank grins wide, flashing white teeth and fuck if that smile isn't what got Gerard into trouble in the first place. One day he'll learn to say no.
Of course, Gerard doesn't point out that if Ray doesn't figure it out, Mikey will. They're living in too close quarters to have secrets anymore. There's plenty of time to worry about that later. For now he lets his eyes slide shut as Frank increases the pressure on the back of Gerard's neck and captures his mouth in a kiss that's hot and demanding. Gerard can't help the whine that leaks between their lips, kissing back and trying not to think about how different Frank's kissing technique is to his own, how he kisses harder and bites more. Wow, that is clearly not working.
Frank pulls back, separating their mouths with a wet noise and whispering hotly, "We've got at least an hour before Kobra and Star get back. We are so watching this." Frank's grin is huge and the way he's squirming up against Gerard is getting Gerard going again already, cutting through his post orgasmic stupor and getting him way too hot in his leathers. Fuck, Gerard still can't say no.
"Um. Okay." He breathes, feeling an answering smile tug at his lips.
"Awesome." Frank bounces on his feet, grabbing the Frankenputer with one hand and Gerard's wrist with the other and dragging him toward the pile of blankets that serves as a bed. He's got the video cued and his chest pressed up against Gerard's back before he's even had a chance to take a breath.
"I should never bet against you. You always win." Gerard sighs, leaning back into Frank's warmth.
Frank's fingers are warm and heavy over the fly of Gerard's pants. He presses a kiss to the back of Gerard's neck. "Double or nothing?"
"What?" Gerard's body seizes at the question. He turns around slowly to find Frank's mouth stretched into a wicked smile.
"You know you want to watch me go fuck myself. One more round. You lose again, you go again, I choose the year. You win and I'll go, you pick the year. And you get to watch."
Gerard tries to speak but he ends up just moving his mouth open and closed. Because damn, that's a mental image right there. "Um, what?" He finally manages.
Frank tugs on one of Gerard's scarlet locks, his breath ghosting warm over Gerard's lips. "I liked your short blond period. That'd be hot. Was your hair long enough to pull? I want to see that."
Gerard has to swallow hard. His mouth has gone dry. His mind is swimming with possibilities. He stutters a few times, stumbling over his own tongue before he gets the words out. "2005."
Frank blinks back at him. Then he's grinning again. "2005." He repeats.
"Yeah." Gerard grins back at him, feathering a hand through Frank's long hair. "The Mohawk."
"Huh." Frank's eyes narrow at Gerard a little, then he's grinning again. "You're so fucking hot for me."
"Shut up." Gerard says, but there's no venom in it. He kisses Frank hard, then pulls back, cupping his face, fingertips brushing over Frank's cheekbones, browner now than they used to be. "You should do it after a show, so you're still in your makeup. That'd be hot."
Frank tries to hide it, but his grin gets wider. "You know, you haven't won yet."
Gerard turns to face the display screen again. "Just hit play, asshole."
(end)
I wrote a sequel to this that turned into my 2011 bandombigbang fic: James Cameron Got It Wrong if you're interested.
(Gerard won.)