FIC: The Prince and The Crossdresser, Part Three
The Prince and the Crossdresser
Due to an unexpected illness, Lex finds himself needing to get out of the public eye. Fortunately, a chance encounter with a beautiful woman he meets in Metropolis will allow him to pull the strings of his company without anyone knowing he’s indisposed. All is going to plan, until Chloe and Clark start nosing around.
Rating: PG-17
Pairing: Lex/Adam/Adina, possibly future Clexina but we'll see
Warning: ( skip) transgender, character with history of rape, attempted but not completed rape
Spoilers: Through S5. Sorority Boys.
Part Three: Wig in a Box
Deep reds and mauves had never been a favorite. They were too hard looking when softer would be better. Taupes and chocolates weren’t feminine enough. The tip of a light rose tube of lipstick pressed slowly against the bow of delicate quirky lips. It never ceased to amaze Adam how the most bizarre elements of his life had become so routine.
“You can come, you know.” He called into the other room, where he could hear Lex moving around. Adam considered going in to stop him, but the chances of that were pretty slim. He pressed his lips together and stood back from the mirror, which was five feet wide easily and well lighted. The color went well with his baby blue dress, which was simple, but flared at the thighs. He placed his hands on his rear and wondered if he should face his ass before or after putting on the wig. Suddenly a pair of hands were around his hips, squeezing delightfully.
“Alex…” Adam shivered as he felt Lex’s teeth on his ear.
“You look like a masterwork.”
“You didn’t answer me before.” Adam deflected. He turned to face Lex and cupped the man’s thin, angular face in his hands. The differences between them became more evident with every pound that man lost. “How are you?”
“Better, actually.” Lex felt content with their arms around one another. “I don’t think it would be wise for me to be seen.”
“With a transvestite.” Adam quipped.
“Looking like a corpse.” Lex finished with irritation. “You really don’t look like one, you know. I imagine most would be hard pressed to pick you out as different.”
“I don’t know about that.” But he appreciated the comment. He didn’t want to look like a man in drag.
Lex kissed his neck softly, cupping his hand against the soft hair growning back on the back of Adam’s head. He loved the black fuzz, almost as he loved when it was grown out, wild and curly. Adam moaned appreciatively at the touch. He smiled as Lex looked at him and moved to his lips.
“You’ll mess up my lipstick.”
“I might mess up more than that.” He declared with amusement. Lex’s hand slipped between Adam’s legs.
“OH!” Adam grabbed the hand and wrestled with him, although he didn’t put his full strength into the effort. “Fresh.”
“Precisely.” He stepped away, gazing over his body wistfully. “Are you a blond today? Or a redhead?”
“I was thinking of the black one. I kind of miss my hair. Took so long to grow out.”
“I miss it too.” Lex remarked without a hint of emotion as he plucked the black wig made with real hair from its holder. Adina leaned against the sink and waited for Lex to slowly cross back in her direction. He had gotten dressed today, and she was glad he had that much energy. It likely wouldn’t last long. His clothing, once filled out by a man who was by no means built, but certainly imposing, hung off his frame as though off the hanger. His hips had gotten so bony, she could feel them poking against her when they lay together in bed.
She lowered her hand, and Lex placed the shining black wig against the crown, carefully and attentively. She had to force herself not to cry. Lex would be angry, though not at her. At the situation, and at himself for not having the strength to fight it off.
When she lifted her head, she smiled shakily and caressed his shoulder. Lex’s features hardened, and she could feel tears coming. His pants were so loose. They could probably come off with just-
Adina quickly moved in front of him, jerked his pants down and proceeded to ruin her lipstick. Lex laughed out loud as he leaned against the cabinet, wove his fingers through her hair, and felt very much in love.
A bit later as she pulled herself back together, Lex lay bonelessly on the bed.
“I’ve ruined you for the day, haven’t I? Such a bad girl.” She chimed, fastening a strap on her shoe and grinning wickedly.
“I think I might recover. I have some work to do in my office today. I should really get to it while I have the chance.”
She knelt by the bed and rubbed his brow adoringly. “I’ll be back early.”
“Just come back.”
***
Lana and Chloe stood anxiously in front of the group of girls. They didn’t look like your typical sorority girls, and for that Chloe was glad. The first houses they’d approached tuned their noses up at Chloe. She thought perhaps if worse came to worse, Lana could pledge at Tri Pi. The girls at Delta Omicron Gamma seemed more Chloe’s speed, though. In that they seemed able to dress in colors other than pink and hold a conversation. She knew Lana was adaptable enough to fit in almost anywhere. Chloe had never been able to force herself to do that, but she admired the trait.
“ARE YOU REALLY PLEDGING HERE?”
The two of the started as one of the older sisters apparently yelled at them. The glass in the house trembled a little bit. That woman and another, much taller woman who had to be Clark’s size at least, were looking at Lana as though she didn’t belong. The fact of the matter was, this membership meeting only had two pledges.
“I’m not exactly Tri Pi material.” Chloe replied. She could hear ringing. “And we’d like to stay together, so…”
The giant, who had her hair in a long ponytail, stepped forward and offered a hand. “I’m Patricia. I’m the president this year, and we welcome any women who want to be stronger. If you’ve felt out of place for any reason or been called a freak or a loser, we want you to feel at home here.”
“We really appreciate that.” Lana said gratefully. She glanced at Chloe, whose expression clearly read: If not vampires, definitely some other kind of mutants.
“We’ll be having a circle later after dinner.” Patricia said. Her voice was deep and hesitant, but she seemed very sweet. “Um, that’s where we all sit in a circle and share and support each other. It’s a little hokey, but it helps a lot. Most of us came in here with pretty low self-esteem.”
“I’ve never heard of a sorority like this.” Chloe said with raised brow. Lana could see her gears turning on a possible article that no one would publish. Chloe had been talking about getting some webspace for her articles until she had a proper outlet again. “Don’t you guys have bake sales or parties?”
“OH YEAH, WE HAVE PARTIES!” The smaller, dark haired girl said energetically. “I’M HEAD OF THE SOCIAL COMMITY.”
Lana’s eyes widened and she smiled and nodded quickly.
A chubby Asian girl added. “Also, we have study groups set up for girls who want to get into math and science. I’m majoring in computer science and math, so I head up that initiative. I’m Susie.”
“OH AND I’M KATIE.”
“You’ll meet everyone else tonight if you want to give us a try.” Patricia said with a smile. “We all get together once a year for a powder puff football game. Everyone plays, no exceptions. Some of us practice all year, though. One of our alumns helps newbies learn. She should be by sometimes soon. We’re trying to get a league together. We also have connections with the local women’s shelter. We try to help out with projects our campus feminist organizations are supporting.”
“Wow. I have to admit, I’m kind of interested to see what you’ve got going on here.” Chloe looked to Lana and raised her brows in askance. Lana shrugged. “Mostly, we were looking to get out of the dorms for financial reasons. I’m not thrilled about spending time with a bunch of superficial girls.”
“Yeah. And the last sorority I pledged… it was well… Tri Psi.“ Lana admitted with a grimace. The women widened their eyes in recognition.
“You’re lucky to have made it out alive. I can at least promise you that we don’t suck as much as they did.” Susie said seriously. She then turned to Katie. “I didn’t just say that, did I?”
Katie made a loud inward sucking laugh. Chloe and Lana started to chuckle in spite of themselves. If nothing else, they seemed like a fun group.
Patricia looked pleased that everyone was getting along, and motioned to them both that she wanted to show them to their room. The two much smaller women followed her up the stairs to a well-furnished affair with three beds in three different colors. Chloe grinned at the Batz Maru plushies and Powerpuff Girl paraphernalia.
“You’ll want to move in your own stuff, of course. We keep extra clothes here if you need them. Sometimes we get girls who have been kicked out of their houses for, you know. Personal reasons. I kept that tradition going because I had to leave home myself.”
“Oh really?” Chloe turned and tilted her head curiously. Patricia didn’t elaborate.
“Anything you don’t need, just put in one of the bins outside in the hall. I have a pick-up and on the weekend we can get your other stuff. Usually we take the extras to Goodwill.” She rocked on her big heels. “Anyway. I’ll leave you guys to talk. I have some work to do, but when you need to haul stuff up from your cars, let me know.” She gave them a goofy grin. “I’m like a one woman moving team.”
“You should meet my friend Clark.”
“He a one-woman demolition squad?” Patricia joked. Chloe laughed.
”Not quite, but I wouldn’t turn down seeing him in a dress.”
Patricia waved to them and closed the door.
“She’s really nice.” Lana said excitedly, still looking at the door. Chloe dropped onto one of the beds and raised her brows thoughtfully.
“They all are.”
“You suspect something?”
“Yes.” She smoothed a hand over the bedspread. “But this is nice. I mean, I don’t know who our other roommate will be. Possibly a mermaid. But no bills for awhile. We can get back on track. Maybe you can find another job.”
Lana frowned a little. The sad part was she didn’t want to get another job she hated. “I’ll do my best. I mean, I don’t really have any references other than myself since I owned my own business. I could reference Lex, but...”
Chloe forced a smile and looked around the room. She could do this. She had to.
***
“Coming through!”
Adina clipped into Le Éclair Vilain cheerfully. Dave and Leah were waiting at their special booth in the back which Rob and Fred kept empty specifically for their group. Leah jumped up and greeted Adina with a hug.
“You look great. Really. I don’t know what he’s got you doing, but…”
Adina wrinkled her nose in a naughty smile. “Not in front of the boys.”
“Hey, man!” Rob came out from the back and grasped her shoulder fondly. “Glad we could finally meet up. Where’s moneybags? He keeping you busy?”
“He wanted to come, bro, but…” She shook her head and forcing a smile. “I can’t really talk about it. He would have liked to, I think.”
Leah took her arm and led her into the booth. “Well, if I can’t ask how he’s doing. How are you?”
“Oh, I’m fine.” Adina waved her hand. Leah looked skeptical. Dave frowned as he scooted over to Leah. “Um. Well, it’s hard. I…” She covered her mouth with one hand. “I…”
“You can tell us anything. You know that.” Dave said softly. He felt a little anxious. The higher, softer tone came more naturally now, and there was less and less difference between ‘Adam’s’ voice and ‘Adina’s’ voice.’ He didn’t really understand, but he wanted to, and if nothing else, he wanted to make sure his best friend didn’t drop into depression like he had ever again. Suddenly there was a clang of pans, and Frederique came out of the kitchen shouting in French.
“I am surrounded by imbeciles. Our lunch will be ready soon.” She announced in her thick accent, stopping to drop a kiss on Rob. “Adina! Oh, you look fantastique.”
She grabbed her chin and looked closely. “Electrolysis, no? Did it hurt? I was thinking of doing so myself.”
“Not much.” She admitted. “Alex was there with me.”
“Sweet of him. Paid for it?” She sat on Adina’s other side. She nodded. “Good.”
“Wait, electrolysis? That’s kind of permanent, isn’t it?” Dave asked hesitantly. Leah gave him a look and a hard elbow. “I’m not trying to be rude, but isn’t it?”
“It is permanent. Just on my face and chest, so far.” Adina rolled her eyes and dropped her voice. She knew Dave wouldn’t be able to handle this. “Don’t look at me like that, dude. There are more permanent things I could do, but I’m thinking about it, like you said, okay? Alex wouldn’t let me jump into anything anyway.”
“C’est genious. It looks tres belle, Adina.” Frederique insisted, waving her hand expressively at Dave. “And no eyuuh… ingrown hair, n’est pas?”
“Yeah, glad to avoid those, huh?” Rob laughed.
“And I love this color on you. But I like the red better.” Fred insisted. Adina smiled and twirled a bit of hair. Dave looked frustrated. He wasn’t impressed by the attempted ‘switch’ for their benefit.
“Did you dye your eyebrows?”
“Yeah. Well, okay.” Adam checked the curtain to their private booth then pulled off his wig.
“Oh no! Your hair. It is gone!”
“Nah, I still have fuzz. See? The idea though is for me to be able to double for Alex sometimes, but it means I have to shave obsessively. Since I’m, you know. Not a fan of being a hairy girl but not really a fan of shaving, I just went ahead and got it permanent in some places.”
“So you’re playing the part of Lex Luthor?” Leah asked incredulously. Adina slid her wig back into place. She made the executive decision not to tell anyone just yet she was starting hormone treatments.
“And what’s wrong? Does he make you do that?” Dave asked pointedly. Adina started to get flustered.
“No! He’s just trying to teach me some things and help me figure out what I want to do. It’s helping him out but…”
“But there’s something wrong, obviously.” Dave sighed and grabbed her hand across the table. She resisted a little and looked at him angrily. “I don’t want him hurting you, okay?”
“I’m learning a lot. And I’m… well I’m sure you can tell the difference.”
“Yeah, I missed the old Adam.” Dave smiled. Adina jerked her hand away. “You know what I mean. You seem a lot less…lost?
“Yeah. He’s been helping me. This is something he’s dealt with himself. Well, not specifically, but the whole shaken identity thing. So, yeah. That’s great. I can’t even say how much better things are. There’s nothing wrong with us either. This is the best relationship I’ve ever had.” She gave a short bitter laugh. “It’s uh, the only relationship I’ve ever had… But he’s just not getting better. ”
The women on both sides of her put an arm around her sympathetically. She hadn’t realized she was drooping a little as she spoke.
“Man, maybe you don’t wanna talk about it, but maybe you need to huh?” Robert mussed her wig a little over the women’s heads. She laughed a bit.
“He. He’s sick. That’s all. And I’ve been trying to pretend that he’s going to be okay, but I don’t know anymore.” She looked up through a blur to see Dave offering her a napkin. He sighed tensely. She knew her relationship with Dave had been tenuous since their adventure at the D.O.G. house. She knew Dave worried about her a lot, and felt fairly guilty, maybe even responsible for her problems. She blew her nose and tried to hide her face in embarrassment. “Fucking mascara.”
“Well, look, dude.” Robert put a large, strong hand on her shoulder. “This thing is serious and not going away, so maybe you need to just deal. I mean, just cry if you gotta. S’okay. I’d be bawlin’ if anything happened to Fred.”
“Yes.” She said flatly patting his leg. “He would. He would be devastated.”
Adina sat quietly and let the tears roll down her cheeks.
“We’re going to go see the new fledgling D.O.Gs this afternoon, Adam. That’ll get your mind off of this.” Dave put in, trying to be helpful.
“She doesn’t need to get her mind off of it. She needs to be able to feel it. Don’t bottle it up.” Robert argued. Adina blew her nose again, picked up another napkin, and dabbed her eyes. To her annoyance the tears kept coming.
“I can handle it. I just don’t want to spend the last of my time with him…” She bit her lip and sobbed again. “Thinking… about how much I’m going to miss him. I’ve been... trying to live it now and… let it hurt later.”
Leah smiled and drew back Adina’s hair with her fingers. “That’s smart. Now, look. You don’t know for sure he isn’t going to make it, right?”
“I have to be realistic about this.”
“Just… I’m so sorry.”
“I know.” She pinched her back and looked at them sheepishly and waved her hands comically. “I’m always the drama queen. Have to be center of attention.”
“It is something to talk about while we wait for my bete assistants to prepare our food.” Frederique said briskly. With that she scooted over Robert’s lap to check on their meal. She never let them order. She always had something special planned just for them. Occasionally, her experimentation turned out too weird to eat, but often the food was unconventional but excellent.
Robert slid over and grabbed Adina in a hug. “Now why don’t you just let it out on old Roberta.” He said in a high falsetto.
“Dude, you’re killing me.” Adina laughed.
“I swear, Rob, of the three of us your voice sounded the most realistic.” Dave shook his head.
“Practice. Well, and the accent, dude. There are old ladies where I come from who look and act like that. All those years in the frat, you think I never did drag before?”
“I wondered how you knew how to put on makeup so well. And how you knew what sizes we’d be in that thrift store.”
“It’s a gift, man. Think Adina’s surpassed her master by now, though.”
“Alex’s voice is so low. I’ve had to do some voice training to go up and down.” She explained. She sniffed and wiped away a few stray tears.
“Okay, that has to be fun when you go to the car mechanic.” Leah said. “Start off all innocent Adina, the guy tries to fleece you, and you drop down low and scare the bastard!”
She laughed. “I don’t own a car. If you ever want to try it, I might be game.”
“Nah. I can fix my own car.”
“I figured.”
“Voila voila voila.” Frederique burst in with a tray full of strangely decorated food, probably smoked salmon? “Food will make all better! Oui?”
“S’why I love her.” Robert grinned lopsidedly.
***
Circumventing Lex’s security system had been such an ongoing activity in Clark’s life; it almost felt good to be doing so again. Long had passed the days when Lex’s guards welcomed him with a smile, by name. The faces had changed so many times over the past few years. At first they stopped recognizing him, although he admitted, that had been his own fault. He’d stopped showing up as often. Sometimes it would be weeks before he dropped by the castle, and he’d feel guilty when he entered Lex’s office. Lex would give him a tight smiled and pretend that Clark wasn’t there because he needed something. Clark often wondered how he’d let Lex slip away from him, when he’d promised himself to always take care of his friend.
It was awhile after that when the guards flatly told him to go away unless he had an appointment. But the jump to denying him entrance out of hand had come quite shortly after. Frankly, Clark was surprised that Lex allowed him entrance for so long once their relationship had died.
Clark walked through the castle, ears perked for anyone coming and headed toward Lex’s office, where he normally found him. He scanned the room to see if he was inside then started. Lex was lying on the floor.
“Lex!” Clark burst into the room. The look on his face was neither grateful nor friendly, but he was conscious and whole, and for that Clark was glad. He scooped the man up in his arms and carried him to the couch in a swift, seamless motion. He was shocked to see his sunken cheeks and lined eyes. He reached for Lex’s face gingerly only to have his hand smacked away. “God, Lex, you’ve got to stop doing this to yourself.”
”What are you talking about?” Even his voice was harsher than he’d remembered.
“Whatever experiment you’re doing. Whatever altered form of kryptonite you’re using… you’ve got to stop, Lex.” Clark said sincerely. He knew the horrified look on his face was only deepening the glare directed at him, but he felt he had to get through somehow. “Can’t you see this is killing you?”
“Killing me?” Lex’s lips twitched, and he widened his eyes for just a second. He tried to lean on his arm and push himself away from Clark. “Is that what this is? God, oh god Clark! Why couldn’t I see it? Heaven help me. How could I have been so blind! I’m so glad you were here to make sure I could see the error of my ways!”
Clark rolled his eyes and stood away from the man whose grin had turned into a sneer.
”Whatever would I do without you Clark!? My hero!”
“You can stop… anytime.”
“Wouldn’t want to wear myself out.” Lex shot back bitterly.
“Okay, so you know this is bad for you.”
“Yeah. Figured that one out on my own.” Lex lay his head down on the couch. He was so tired the room was starting to spin. “I was trying to get some work done and overestimated how long I could work. That’s all there is to it.”
“That doesn’t answer anything. What’s happening to you?” Clark demanded. Lex didn’t open his eyes.
“I don’t see how that’s any of your business.”
“Normal, healthy men don’t collapse on the floor of their office. I saw you the other day, and you looked completely different”
“Did I.” Lex moved to give Clark a scathing look, to make him leave as quickly as possible, but he held back when he saw the look on the young man’s face. He looked like someone had just splattered his mother on the side of the road with a mack truck. Clark was really worried about him. That was so much worse.
“I uh… came to ask you why you got Lana fired.”
Lex’s interest perked. “Fired?”
“I’m finding it hard to believe you don’t remember it. You called her a flat-chested tramp. And you called me a meathead and demanded the manager fire her.”
“Must have caught me on a bad day.” He replied guardedly. He knew now what Clark was talking about.
“She’s losing everything, Lex. She needed that job.” He winced just looking at Lex. He moved so slowly, as though everything hurt him. As though he were tired to his very bones.
“So basically, you’re here to make sure the big bad Luthor doesn’t pick on Lana Lang, the most innocent and pure woman of the face of the planet?”
Clark sighed. He just couldn’t deal with Lex’s moods sometimes.
“Lana Lang would never do anything wrong.” He said with thick sarcasm. “Lana Lang would never pick a fight she couldn’t get out of. Forget she treated you like trash for years. Forget she was practically in heat with that spandex loving boy scout at our wedding!”
Clark listened to Lex’s heart speed up. Though his face remained fairly calm, although twisted and bitter, he was becoming angrier and angrier. “I don’t understand why you aren’t angry with Superman instead of Lana.”
“Because Lana is a grown woman capable of making her own choices. He can do a lot of things, but I’ve never heard of any super-seduction powers. She willingly betrayed me.” Lex struggled to sit up. “And you come to me in her defense. You come to me.”
“She didn’t mean to hurt-“
“SHE BROKE MY HEART!” Lex squirmed around, trying to twist his back or get up, neither of which he could do under his own power. Clark wanted to reach forward and help, but he thought that might just make it worse. “Get the fuck out of here.”
“Lex, something’s going on. You’re sick-“
“GET OUT GET OUT GET OUT!!!” Lex screamed at him picking up a pillow and futilely throwing it in his direction. Clark stood and held his hands up in surrender. A second later a guard appeared and grabbed his arm roughly. As he was leaving, he looked back and saw Lex with his head in his hands.
Clark didn’t care how angry Lex got or how many wicked things he did. Clark had to help him. Lex was clearly in trouble, clearly angry about it, and a life was a life was a life. He had to save Lex.
***
When Adina returned that evening, the place was even quieter than she was used to. She headed first to the office to see if Lex were still working, then made her way up to the bedroom. She could have Cook send something up for them.
When, to her surprise, Lex wasn’t in the bedroom, she started to worry a little. She halted her panic with the reminder that she would be called immediately if he were rushed to the hospital. Silently, she slid off her heeled sandals and started to strip as she moved across the room. She pulled a pair of Lex’s old jeans out of the large dresser and one of her own green sweaters. The jeans were a bit snug in the rear, but otherwise quite loose. She pulled her hair into pigtails before leaving the room barefoot to find him.
She padded quietly down the hallway, trying to think of where Lex might be, wondering if he just wanted to be alone, or if he might have taken one of the cars for a drive… no. With his medication, the servants wouldn’t allow it. He’d hurt himself.
“If I were an evil genius, where would I be?” She asked herself. Then she closed her eyes. “Idiot.”
Wrapping the ends of her sleeves around her fingers, she headed towards the library. It took her a few minutes to get there, but sure enough, there was Lex, curled up with Nietzsche and a near empty bottle of scotch on the sofa. He looked up at her with forlorn, unfocused eyes. It was rare to see his face so open. She moved over to the sofa wordlessly, and curled up next to him.
“How was lunch with your friends.” His voice was lifeless. Adina kissed his straight, proud nose.
“Excellent. We talked about the new pledges, and Leah’s take-down-the-man activities. Le Eclaire Vilain is doing really well. Rob-“
“Are you serious? Le Eclaire Vilain? The Naughty Eclaire?”
Adina grinned and nodded.
“What do I expect from a K.O.K?”
“I’m not sure.” She wrapped a leg around his. Lex laid his face wearily on her shoulder. “Tell me about it. Please?”
He didn’t answer immediately. “Clark came by today.”
“The farmboy turned journalist Clark? What the hell did he want?”
“Apparently the no-tits bitch you got fired last… a little while ago. That was my ex-wife.”
“Oh.” She pursed her lips but didn’t look particularly distressed. “Good. Or am I in trouble?”
“No. But it means… Adina, love, what she said to you wasn’t personal. Well, it was, but it was personally directed at me, and not at you.” His hand slid down her thigh. “You look good in my jeans. I forgot that I owned those.”
“Come ooon.” She crooned, placing a hand over his. “That wasn’t what got you so upset.”
“I am not upset.”
“Alex.” Adina felt her lip bow. She wasn’t going to fucking cry again, dammit. She closed her eyes and felt his hand on her chin and his thumb on her cheek. “You don’t have to tell me.”
“Clark… I lost my temper. I couldn’t…” He clenched his jaw in self-disgust. “I couldn’t stand for him to see me like this.”
She squeezed his hand sympathetically and said nothing.
“And now, he’s going to make a mess of things trying to figure out why I look different from when you met him in the coffee shop.” Lex sighed and looked exasperated at an ordeal to come.
“He was very important to you.” Adina tilted her head, gauging the look on his face.
“He was my friend.”
“He was more than a friend.”
“Only to me. He never…” Lex shook his head. “But I lost him. As a friend and as whatever… I hoped we might become.”
“His loss.”
Lex shrugged. Adina was surprised to see his attitude. Not from Lex Fucken Luthor.
“His. Loss. It isn’t okay, Lex! It’s not okay that some dumb bitch cheats on you and expects you to keep taking her abuse whenever you meet in a random coffee shop. What she said wouldn’t be okay to say to you when it wasn’t okay to say to me.” Adina felt her throat tightening. “He hurt you, didn’t he? That wasn’t okay either. You don’t have to put up with people hurting you. Ever. Is that why you keep thinking I’m going to leave you? Because you have this fucked up notion that the shit people do to you is something you deserve?”
“Leave it.” He said tersely.
“No. No, I can’t.” She put her arms around him. “You don’t deserve it. And I’m not leaving you.”
“You should. I’m leaving you.” He pointed out darkly.
“So what? I have to hurt you before you end up hurting me? Fuck that.” She kissed his shoulder, which was the only thing she could reach from this position. “Fuck that. I’m not going anywhere.”
“I almost wish you would.”
Adina sat back and gave him a look that clearly asked what he was on. “I’d hurt either way. I rather be with you while I can… I’ve thought about this a lot. Not about leaving you, but about never having met you.” Adina’s eyes looked around the study, just for any other place to look. “So many things in my life have changed so quickly. And now it’s all so normal and so right. This is my life and you’re a part of it. It’s one thing if it’s taken from me, but I’m not going to tear it apart with my own hands.”
”Life is pain.” Lex muttered. He began stroking her hair. “Do you… I’m sorry.”
“Go on.”
“When you see me. Do you still… Are you-?”
“I’m terrified. Looking at you means I have to face the idea that I’m losing you. Scares the hell outta me. I’m not ready. I don’t think I ever will be. And that’s hard.” She trailed her well-manicured fingertips over the curve of his head. The skin was still soft, but stiffer than it had been. “But you’re still sexy as hell. I don’t know how you do it.”
The right corner of Lex’s mouth turned up, but it was in disbelief.
“Dude, do you know how it feels when you get horny during a tuck? It sucks.”
Lex chuckled.
“I know we haven’t been…. really active. For us anyway. Not cause…” She slid her hand underneath his shirt and started to rub against his nipple. “There wasn’t desire.”
Lex writhed against her touch. Adina’s leg was intertwined with his. She caressed his thin face.
“The will is strong, but the body is weak.”
Adina slithered on top of him and they stretched out on the plush black sofa. Already her hand was down his pants, deft fingers moving with barely there touches.
“You don’t have to.” Lex rested his head on one of the crushed velvet pillows complementing the sofa.
“You make it sound like a chore, babe.”
“I don’t want to… let you down.” He ground out tensely. Adina smirked. She knew this whole ordeal was wearing hard on an ego that hadn’t been strong to begin with, even if he was more capable than most of taking the abuse given to him.
“You don’t seem down to me.” She said coyly.
Lex looked down where Adina’s hand was stroking. A bulge was starting to grow in spite of himself. He wasn’t greatly surprised, but he would have thought by now that Adina would have gotten fed up with him. There was a time when just watching her do everyday things got him uncomfortably hard.
Her free hand gripped his shoulder, as she unbuttoned her jeans.
“Adina-“
“Shhh…” She started to shimmy out of the jeans, giving a wiggle here and there as she straddled him. Lex smiled softly and reached up to put his hands between the material and her smooth soft skin. Adina let him slide them the rest of the way down, then balanced on one leg as she turned sideways as she wiggled the legs down, revealing a silky pair of red panties. She could feel her backside jiggling, and as self-conscious as it made her in public, she felt like the ultimate feminine sex symbol with Lex lying there with a spreading grin on his face and the rising bulge in his pants. Her plump rear made him seriously hard. She bent over the couch suggestively.
“Ohhh…” Lex put one hand to his head. She swayed from side to side, giggling. He shifted his hips. “Girl, dammit. Stop torturing me.”
Adina was beaming. She stripped off her sweater, leaving the bra that disguised her still flat chest, and set to work on his belt. Lex looked a little anxious, but she slid the belt out from the loops and cracked it over her head. She smirked as he burst into laughter.
“I’m a bad girl.” She said with a mock schoolgirl voice.
“I wouldn’t have anything to do with a good girl.” Lex declared. She set her hands on his narrow hips and jerked his pants and boxers down.
“There’s what I want.” She stroked the base of his upright cock. And gave it a little kiss. She started to get up, then swore. “Fuck. Hold on.”
Lex pointed. “There’s a bathroom over there.”
“I don’t have to piss. I need some fucking lube.”
“I guessed that much. There’s some hand lotion. And maybe lube, actually. I have no idea where I have it stashed in this place anymore. About as many places as I have guns.” He paused. “Well, probably more guns, but still.”
Adina came trotting back with the hand lotion, shaking her head. “You are something else.”
“No lube? Sorry.”
“No, but there was a gun in there, you crazy man.” She gave him a peck on the lips and slipped off her panties. She was fairly hard of her own accord, but that was an issue all unto itself. She crawled back onto the couch and let him pull her closer. Gently, she stroked his cock with hand lotion while he put some on his fingers and reached between her legs with two fingers. “Mmmm.”
Lex concentrated on making her squirm. This had always been a particular hobby of his, making guys who thought they were tops wriggle around on his fingers. Her touches on her cock were too light to make him come too soon, thankfully. He wasn’t sure how many times he could come, although he remembered fondly their days of marathon lovemaking on every surface in the castle. After a moment she grabbed his wrist. He pulled them out and watched as she straddled him then wrapped her fingers around his shirt, as she met his lips with an openmouthed kiss. Then slowly, slowly lowered herself onto him and began to ride.
Lex wasn’t quite sure if she still wanted him touching her cock, but he figured they could talk it out later. Grabbing the hand lotion, he began to gently pump her erection, concentrating on timing his administrations with her own rocking. She made a throaty squeal and clutched his shirt even tighter.
”Oh, god Alex!” She cried, riding him faster. Lex clutched her arm with his right hand with an intense look of concentration on his face. “I love you!”
Definitely okay to touch the cock for now. He kept going and let her take control, something he was not accustomed to. Although he couldn’t resist bucking his hips along with her, trying to push farther, hold on a little longer so she could come first…
As Adina erupted over his shirt, she let out a joyful howl that certainly let the servants know what they were up to in the library. Then Lex let go with a moan of his own. She leaned on his chest, panting for a few minutes before she stretched up to let him out. Lex laughed softly a she curled up on top of him, ignoring the sticky semen between them and rested her head on his shoulder.
“What? I made it, I can lay in it.” She said, unfazed.
“You’re really the best woman I’ve ever been with.” He replied seriously.
She smiled and let him pet her hair. “It just seems like that since we’re perfect for each other.”
“Seems so.” He kissed her head. “Sorry that was so short.”
“Short nothing, you’re good with your hands. All had a rollicking good time, and that’s all it needs… you know you’re the only person I’ve willingly cuddled with? Granted sometimes, I used to just fall asleep after and some spooning would happen… you know. But never on purpose. It never felt this good.”
“I’ve never been a cuddler either. Or one to stay the night, even. I’m more likely to flee the scene directly after..” Lex admitted. “Except with my boarding school roommate.”
“OoooOOOooo.” Adina teased.
“I was a little slut.” He trailed the clean part of his hand around her face.
“I had my share of partners too. You know that.”
“I just wonder how I went through that many women… and men looking for the right person and I never found you until now.”
Adina nuzzled her face into Lex’s shoulder. He never told her he loved her. She suspected that with some of his emotional problems, he didn’t know how, or maybe he couldn’t. But she could tell when he said things like this, did the things that he did for her, that he loved her more than he could have said, even if he could find the words. And that was a very good feeling. She’d never felt particularly loved growing up either.
“I don’t think… I wanted to be found. For a long time.”
Lex mused on this. “We should get cleaned up before I fall asleep.”
Adina nodded and moved to help him get up. She found, to his embarrassment, that Lex was a little weak in the knees, and she didn’t want to ask if that had been why he was curled up and not working when she found him earlier. Maybe it had been the sex. In either case, they moved slowly towards one of the larger bathrooms so they could soak in the large tub.
She let Lex sit on the rim as she started the water, and he slowly began to unbutton his shirt. She kissed him before grabbing a towel and walking out for a moment. She would ask the cook to have something brought up for them. Lex would definitely be too tired to have a big dinner.
Lex sat pensively on the edge of the tub, staring down at his thin, frail form, wondering how anyone could find that attractive. Not that he’d ever found himself greatly attractive, or any of the major players in his love life had either. Helen had certainly been the most vocal of her distaste for his looks, for touching his head and looking at his hairless body. He should have known that she wasn’t that drawn to his mind. Most people, he was sure, wanted him for something. To use him. To use him up? To get money from or to replace them when they grew old or to serve as their dark shadow so they could be the good one. To make their old boyfriend jealous. For money money money.
He tested the water and reached for the cabinet to get some fragrant bath salts. He slipped off the tub and fell hard on his butt. With an eye roll, he crawled over to the cabinet, opened it, and selected a lavender rose. He crawled over, refusing to acknowledge to himself that he was indeed crawling about like an infant, and poured some in. Then crawled into the tub himself to mix them.
“Hey, babe.” Adina returned and took off her wig before slipping in herself. “We’ll have something to eat in a bit.”
Her toes sought out his and there was some laughter and giggling in the tub as they washed and kissed on one another. When the food came, Adina remained playful, feeding him small bits and allowing him to feed her. He didn’t eat much, but he tried for her, and that made her happy. That he was still trying, still cared enough to try.
After slipping out of the bath, Lex was now so exhausted, Adina wasn’t sure she could handle the weight herself, so Lex let her call a servant to help. The man was tight-lipped and business-like about helping Lex to bed and nodded to him before leaving their bedroom, as though this were an everyday occurrence and nothing needed to be said.
“I’m not sure I pay them enough.”
“You pay them a lot.”
”They put up with me. They deserve it.” Lex countered. He stretched out on his bed in his black silk pajamas and looked at the clock. “It’s so early. You can’t be tired.”
“Well, no.” Adina snuggled next to him. Lex had gotten her a pair of blue silk pajamas which matched his own. “But I’m certainly not tired of your company, so I’ll stay with you.”
“That has to be boring for you.” He complained. Adina knew that asking Lex to start acting like a sick person would be completely in vain.
“I’ll get a book when you go to sleep. I should read more anyway. But I’ll be here when you wake up, Alex. I will be as long as you continue to wake up.”
“If that’s your promise, then I think I’ll just have to keep doing so until you leave me.” He gave her a flirty smirk as though he had control over that and all the factors in their lives threatening their relationship.
“I never will. You’ll see.” She scrunched up her nose, and he chucked her chin with his fingers. “What do you think of the new Revolutionary War arch?”
“Unbelievably idiotic.” Lex said without hesitation or note of the switch of conversation to comic books. “Waylon Weir would never reveal his secret identity like that. It goes against years of characterization.”
“I know. But he’s Danny’s bitch now. He does what the plot demands” Adina replied.
“That makes for a sad sad creature.”
They talked comics for awhile until Lex couldn’t keep his eyes open much longer, and Adina just watched him, rubbing the back of his head gently until he fell asleep. She stepped away for a few minutes and fetched his Nietzsche from the library to read while he slept.
Due to an unexpected illness, Lex finds himself needing to get out of the public eye. Fortunately, a chance encounter with a beautiful woman he meets in Metropolis will allow him to pull the strings of his company without anyone knowing he’s indisposed. All is going to plan, until Chloe and Clark start nosing around.
Rating: PG-17
Pairing: Lex/Adam/Adina, possibly future Clexina but we'll see
Warning: ( skip) transgender, character with history of rape, attempted but not completed rape
Spoilers: Through S5. Sorority Boys.
Part Three: Wig in a Box
Deep reds and mauves had never been a favorite. They were too hard looking when softer would be better. Taupes and chocolates weren’t feminine enough. The tip of a light rose tube of lipstick pressed slowly against the bow of delicate quirky lips. It never ceased to amaze Adam how the most bizarre elements of his life had become so routine.
“You can come, you know.” He called into the other room, where he could hear Lex moving around. Adam considered going in to stop him, but the chances of that were pretty slim. He pressed his lips together and stood back from the mirror, which was five feet wide easily and well lighted. The color went well with his baby blue dress, which was simple, but flared at the thighs. He placed his hands on his rear and wondered if he should face his ass before or after putting on the wig. Suddenly a pair of hands were around his hips, squeezing delightfully.
“Alex…” Adam shivered as he felt Lex’s teeth on his ear.
“You look like a masterwork.”
“You didn’t answer me before.” Adam deflected. He turned to face Lex and cupped the man’s thin, angular face in his hands. The differences between them became more evident with every pound that man lost. “How are you?”
“Better, actually.” Lex felt content with their arms around one another. “I don’t think it would be wise for me to be seen.”
“With a transvestite.” Adam quipped.
“Looking like a corpse.” Lex finished with irritation. “You really don’t look like one, you know. I imagine most would be hard pressed to pick you out as different.”
“I don’t know about that.” But he appreciated the comment. He didn’t want to look like a man in drag.
Lex kissed his neck softly, cupping his hand against the soft hair growning back on the back of Adam’s head. He loved the black fuzz, almost as he loved when it was grown out, wild and curly. Adam moaned appreciatively at the touch. He smiled as Lex looked at him and moved to his lips.
“You’ll mess up my lipstick.”
“I might mess up more than that.” He declared with amusement. Lex’s hand slipped between Adam’s legs.
“OH!” Adam grabbed the hand and wrestled with him, although he didn’t put his full strength into the effort. “Fresh.”
“Precisely.” He stepped away, gazing over his body wistfully. “Are you a blond today? Or a redhead?”
“I was thinking of the black one. I kind of miss my hair. Took so long to grow out.”
“I miss it too.” Lex remarked without a hint of emotion as he plucked the black wig made with real hair from its holder. Adina leaned against the sink and waited for Lex to slowly cross back in her direction. He had gotten dressed today, and she was glad he had that much energy. It likely wouldn’t last long. His clothing, once filled out by a man who was by no means built, but certainly imposing, hung off his frame as though off the hanger. His hips had gotten so bony, she could feel them poking against her when they lay together in bed.
She lowered her hand, and Lex placed the shining black wig against the crown, carefully and attentively. She had to force herself not to cry. Lex would be angry, though not at her. At the situation, and at himself for not having the strength to fight it off.
When she lifted her head, she smiled shakily and caressed his shoulder. Lex’s features hardened, and she could feel tears coming. His pants were so loose. They could probably come off with just-
Adina quickly moved in front of him, jerked his pants down and proceeded to ruin her lipstick. Lex laughed out loud as he leaned against the cabinet, wove his fingers through her hair, and felt very much in love.
A bit later as she pulled herself back together, Lex lay bonelessly on the bed.
“I’ve ruined you for the day, haven’t I? Such a bad girl.” She chimed, fastening a strap on her shoe and grinning wickedly.
“I think I might recover. I have some work to do in my office today. I should really get to it while I have the chance.”
She knelt by the bed and rubbed his brow adoringly. “I’ll be back early.”
“Just come back.”
***
Lana and Chloe stood anxiously in front of the group of girls. They didn’t look like your typical sorority girls, and for that Chloe was glad. The first houses they’d approached tuned their noses up at Chloe. She thought perhaps if worse came to worse, Lana could pledge at Tri Pi. The girls at Delta Omicron Gamma seemed more Chloe’s speed, though. In that they seemed able to dress in colors other than pink and hold a conversation. She knew Lana was adaptable enough to fit in almost anywhere. Chloe had never been able to force herself to do that, but she admired the trait.
“ARE YOU REALLY PLEDGING HERE?”
The two of the started as one of the older sisters apparently yelled at them. The glass in the house trembled a little bit. That woman and another, much taller woman who had to be Clark’s size at least, were looking at Lana as though she didn’t belong. The fact of the matter was, this membership meeting only had two pledges.
“I’m not exactly Tri Pi material.” Chloe replied. She could hear ringing. “And we’d like to stay together, so…”
The giant, who had her hair in a long ponytail, stepped forward and offered a hand. “I’m Patricia. I’m the president this year, and we welcome any women who want to be stronger. If you’ve felt out of place for any reason or been called a freak or a loser, we want you to feel at home here.”
“We really appreciate that.” Lana said gratefully. She glanced at Chloe, whose expression clearly read: If not vampires, definitely some other kind of mutants.
“We’ll be having a circle later after dinner.” Patricia said. Her voice was deep and hesitant, but she seemed very sweet. “Um, that’s where we all sit in a circle and share and support each other. It’s a little hokey, but it helps a lot. Most of us came in here with pretty low self-esteem.”
“I’ve never heard of a sorority like this.” Chloe said with raised brow. Lana could see her gears turning on a possible article that no one would publish. Chloe had been talking about getting some webspace for her articles until she had a proper outlet again. “Don’t you guys have bake sales or parties?”
“OH YEAH, WE HAVE PARTIES!” The smaller, dark haired girl said energetically. “I’M HEAD OF THE SOCIAL COMMITY.”
Lana’s eyes widened and she smiled and nodded quickly.
A chubby Asian girl added. “Also, we have study groups set up for girls who want to get into math and science. I’m majoring in computer science and math, so I head up that initiative. I’m Susie.”
“OH AND I’M KATIE.”
“You’ll meet everyone else tonight if you want to give us a try.” Patricia said with a smile. “We all get together once a year for a powder puff football game. Everyone plays, no exceptions. Some of us practice all year, though. One of our alumns helps newbies learn. She should be by sometimes soon. We’re trying to get a league together. We also have connections with the local women’s shelter. We try to help out with projects our campus feminist organizations are supporting.”
“Wow. I have to admit, I’m kind of interested to see what you’ve got going on here.” Chloe looked to Lana and raised her brows in askance. Lana shrugged. “Mostly, we were looking to get out of the dorms for financial reasons. I’m not thrilled about spending time with a bunch of superficial girls.”
“Yeah. And the last sorority I pledged… it was well… Tri Psi.“ Lana admitted with a grimace. The women widened their eyes in recognition.
“You’re lucky to have made it out alive. I can at least promise you that we don’t suck as much as they did.” Susie said seriously. She then turned to Katie. “I didn’t just say that, did I?”
Katie made a loud inward sucking laugh. Chloe and Lana started to chuckle in spite of themselves. If nothing else, they seemed like a fun group.
Patricia looked pleased that everyone was getting along, and motioned to them both that she wanted to show them to their room. The two much smaller women followed her up the stairs to a well-furnished affair with three beds in three different colors. Chloe grinned at the Batz Maru plushies and Powerpuff Girl paraphernalia.
“You’ll want to move in your own stuff, of course. We keep extra clothes here if you need them. Sometimes we get girls who have been kicked out of their houses for, you know. Personal reasons. I kept that tradition going because I had to leave home myself.”
“Oh really?” Chloe turned and tilted her head curiously. Patricia didn’t elaborate.
“Anything you don’t need, just put in one of the bins outside in the hall. I have a pick-up and on the weekend we can get your other stuff. Usually we take the extras to Goodwill.” She rocked on her big heels. “Anyway. I’ll leave you guys to talk. I have some work to do, but when you need to haul stuff up from your cars, let me know.” She gave them a goofy grin. “I’m like a one woman moving team.”
“You should meet my friend Clark.”
“He a one-woman demolition squad?” Patricia joked. Chloe laughed.
”Not quite, but I wouldn’t turn down seeing him in a dress.”
Patricia waved to them and closed the door.
“She’s really nice.” Lana said excitedly, still looking at the door. Chloe dropped onto one of the beds and raised her brows thoughtfully.
“They all are.”
“You suspect something?”
“Yes.” She smoothed a hand over the bedspread. “But this is nice. I mean, I don’t know who our other roommate will be. Possibly a mermaid. But no bills for awhile. We can get back on track. Maybe you can find another job.”
Lana frowned a little. The sad part was she didn’t want to get another job she hated. “I’ll do my best. I mean, I don’t really have any references other than myself since I owned my own business. I could reference Lex, but...”
Chloe forced a smile and looked around the room. She could do this. She had to.
***
“Coming through!”
Adina clipped into Le Éclair Vilain cheerfully. Dave and Leah were waiting at their special booth in the back which Rob and Fred kept empty specifically for their group. Leah jumped up and greeted Adina with a hug.
“You look great. Really. I don’t know what he’s got you doing, but…”
Adina wrinkled her nose in a naughty smile. “Not in front of the boys.”
“Hey, man!” Rob came out from the back and grasped her shoulder fondly. “Glad we could finally meet up. Where’s moneybags? He keeping you busy?”
“He wanted to come, bro, but…” She shook her head and forcing a smile. “I can’t really talk about it. He would have liked to, I think.”
Leah took her arm and led her into the booth. “Well, if I can’t ask how he’s doing. How are you?”
“Oh, I’m fine.” Adina waved her hand. Leah looked skeptical. Dave frowned as he scooted over to Leah. “Um. Well, it’s hard. I…” She covered her mouth with one hand. “I…”
“You can tell us anything. You know that.” Dave said softly. He felt a little anxious. The higher, softer tone came more naturally now, and there was less and less difference between ‘Adam’s’ voice and ‘Adina’s’ voice.’ He didn’t really understand, but he wanted to, and if nothing else, he wanted to make sure his best friend didn’t drop into depression like he had ever again. Suddenly there was a clang of pans, and Frederique came out of the kitchen shouting in French.
“I am surrounded by imbeciles. Our lunch will be ready soon.” She announced in her thick accent, stopping to drop a kiss on Rob. “Adina! Oh, you look fantastique.”
She grabbed her chin and looked closely. “Electrolysis, no? Did it hurt? I was thinking of doing so myself.”
“Not much.” She admitted. “Alex was there with me.”
“Sweet of him. Paid for it?” She sat on Adina’s other side. She nodded. “Good.”
“Wait, electrolysis? That’s kind of permanent, isn’t it?” Dave asked hesitantly. Leah gave him a look and a hard elbow. “I’m not trying to be rude, but isn’t it?”
“It is permanent. Just on my face and chest, so far.” Adina rolled her eyes and dropped her voice. She knew Dave wouldn’t be able to handle this. “Don’t look at me like that, dude. There are more permanent things I could do, but I’m thinking about it, like you said, okay? Alex wouldn’t let me jump into anything anyway.”
“C’est genious. It looks tres belle, Adina.” Frederique insisted, waving her hand expressively at Dave. “And no eyuuh… ingrown hair, n’est pas?”
“Yeah, glad to avoid those, huh?” Rob laughed.
“And I love this color on you. But I like the red better.” Fred insisted. Adina smiled and twirled a bit of hair. Dave looked frustrated. He wasn’t impressed by the attempted ‘switch’ for their benefit.
“Did you dye your eyebrows?”
“Yeah. Well, okay.” Adam checked the curtain to their private booth then pulled off his wig.
“Oh no! Your hair. It is gone!”
“Nah, I still have fuzz. See? The idea though is for me to be able to double for Alex sometimes, but it means I have to shave obsessively. Since I’m, you know. Not a fan of being a hairy girl but not really a fan of shaving, I just went ahead and got it permanent in some places.”
“So you’re playing the part of Lex Luthor?” Leah asked incredulously. Adina slid her wig back into place. She made the executive decision not to tell anyone just yet she was starting hormone treatments.
“And what’s wrong? Does he make you do that?” Dave asked pointedly. Adina started to get flustered.
“No! He’s just trying to teach me some things and help me figure out what I want to do. It’s helping him out but…”
“But there’s something wrong, obviously.” Dave sighed and grabbed her hand across the table. She resisted a little and looked at him angrily. “I don’t want him hurting you, okay?”
“I’m learning a lot. And I’m… well I’m sure you can tell the difference.”
“Yeah, I missed the old Adam.” Dave smiled. Adina jerked her hand away. “You know what I mean. You seem a lot less…lost?
“Yeah. He’s been helping me. This is something he’s dealt with himself. Well, not specifically, but the whole shaken identity thing. So, yeah. That’s great. I can’t even say how much better things are. There’s nothing wrong with us either. This is the best relationship I’ve ever had.” She gave a short bitter laugh. “It’s uh, the only relationship I’ve ever had… But he’s just not getting better. ”
The women on both sides of her put an arm around her sympathetically. She hadn’t realized she was drooping a little as she spoke.
“Man, maybe you don’t wanna talk about it, but maybe you need to huh?” Robert mussed her wig a little over the women’s heads. She laughed a bit.
“He. He’s sick. That’s all. And I’ve been trying to pretend that he’s going to be okay, but I don’t know anymore.” She looked up through a blur to see Dave offering her a napkin. He sighed tensely. She knew her relationship with Dave had been tenuous since their adventure at the D.O.G. house. She knew Dave worried about her a lot, and felt fairly guilty, maybe even responsible for her problems. She blew her nose and tried to hide her face in embarrassment. “Fucking mascara.”
“Well, look, dude.” Robert put a large, strong hand on her shoulder. “This thing is serious and not going away, so maybe you need to just deal. I mean, just cry if you gotta. S’okay. I’d be bawlin’ if anything happened to Fred.”
“Yes.” She said flatly patting his leg. “He would. He would be devastated.”
Adina sat quietly and let the tears roll down her cheeks.
“We’re going to go see the new fledgling D.O.Gs this afternoon, Adam. That’ll get your mind off of this.” Dave put in, trying to be helpful.
“She doesn’t need to get her mind off of it. She needs to be able to feel it. Don’t bottle it up.” Robert argued. Adina blew her nose again, picked up another napkin, and dabbed her eyes. To her annoyance the tears kept coming.
“I can handle it. I just don’t want to spend the last of my time with him…” She bit her lip and sobbed again. “Thinking… about how much I’m going to miss him. I’ve been... trying to live it now and… let it hurt later.”
Leah smiled and drew back Adina’s hair with her fingers. “That’s smart. Now, look. You don’t know for sure he isn’t going to make it, right?”
“I have to be realistic about this.”
“Just… I’m so sorry.”
“I know.” She pinched her back and looked at them sheepishly and waved her hands comically. “I’m always the drama queen. Have to be center of attention.”
“It is something to talk about while we wait for my bete assistants to prepare our food.” Frederique said briskly. With that she scooted over Robert’s lap to check on their meal. She never let them order. She always had something special planned just for them. Occasionally, her experimentation turned out too weird to eat, but often the food was unconventional but excellent.
Robert slid over and grabbed Adina in a hug. “Now why don’t you just let it out on old Roberta.” He said in a high falsetto.
“Dude, you’re killing me.” Adina laughed.
“I swear, Rob, of the three of us your voice sounded the most realistic.” Dave shook his head.
“Practice. Well, and the accent, dude. There are old ladies where I come from who look and act like that. All those years in the frat, you think I never did drag before?”
“I wondered how you knew how to put on makeup so well. And how you knew what sizes we’d be in that thrift store.”
“It’s a gift, man. Think Adina’s surpassed her master by now, though.”
“Alex’s voice is so low. I’ve had to do some voice training to go up and down.” She explained. She sniffed and wiped away a few stray tears.
“Okay, that has to be fun when you go to the car mechanic.” Leah said. “Start off all innocent Adina, the guy tries to fleece you, and you drop down low and scare the bastard!”
She laughed. “I don’t own a car. If you ever want to try it, I might be game.”
“Nah. I can fix my own car.”
“I figured.”
“Voila voila voila.” Frederique burst in with a tray full of strangely decorated food, probably smoked salmon? “Food will make all better! Oui?”
“S’why I love her.” Robert grinned lopsidedly.
***
Circumventing Lex’s security system had been such an ongoing activity in Clark’s life; it almost felt good to be doing so again. Long had passed the days when Lex’s guards welcomed him with a smile, by name. The faces had changed so many times over the past few years. At first they stopped recognizing him, although he admitted, that had been his own fault. He’d stopped showing up as often. Sometimes it would be weeks before he dropped by the castle, and he’d feel guilty when he entered Lex’s office. Lex would give him a tight smiled and pretend that Clark wasn’t there because he needed something. Clark often wondered how he’d let Lex slip away from him, when he’d promised himself to always take care of his friend.
It was awhile after that when the guards flatly told him to go away unless he had an appointment. But the jump to denying him entrance out of hand had come quite shortly after. Frankly, Clark was surprised that Lex allowed him entrance for so long once their relationship had died.
Clark walked through the castle, ears perked for anyone coming and headed toward Lex’s office, where he normally found him. He scanned the room to see if he was inside then started. Lex was lying on the floor.
“Lex!” Clark burst into the room. The look on his face was neither grateful nor friendly, but he was conscious and whole, and for that Clark was glad. He scooped the man up in his arms and carried him to the couch in a swift, seamless motion. He was shocked to see his sunken cheeks and lined eyes. He reached for Lex’s face gingerly only to have his hand smacked away. “God, Lex, you’ve got to stop doing this to yourself.”
”What are you talking about?” Even his voice was harsher than he’d remembered.
“Whatever experiment you’re doing. Whatever altered form of kryptonite you’re using… you’ve got to stop, Lex.” Clark said sincerely. He knew the horrified look on his face was only deepening the glare directed at him, but he felt he had to get through somehow. “Can’t you see this is killing you?”
“Killing me?” Lex’s lips twitched, and he widened his eyes for just a second. He tried to lean on his arm and push himself away from Clark. “Is that what this is? God, oh god Clark! Why couldn’t I see it? Heaven help me. How could I have been so blind! I’m so glad you were here to make sure I could see the error of my ways!”
Clark rolled his eyes and stood away from the man whose grin had turned into a sneer.
”Whatever would I do without you Clark!? My hero!”
“You can stop… anytime.”
“Wouldn’t want to wear myself out.” Lex shot back bitterly.
“Okay, so you know this is bad for you.”
“Yeah. Figured that one out on my own.” Lex lay his head down on the couch. He was so tired the room was starting to spin. “I was trying to get some work done and overestimated how long I could work. That’s all there is to it.”
“That doesn’t answer anything. What’s happening to you?” Clark demanded. Lex didn’t open his eyes.
“I don’t see how that’s any of your business.”
“Normal, healthy men don’t collapse on the floor of their office. I saw you the other day, and you looked completely different”
“Did I.” Lex moved to give Clark a scathing look, to make him leave as quickly as possible, but he held back when he saw the look on the young man’s face. He looked like someone had just splattered his mother on the side of the road with a mack truck. Clark was really worried about him. That was so much worse.
“I uh… came to ask you why you got Lana fired.”
Lex’s interest perked. “Fired?”
“I’m finding it hard to believe you don’t remember it. You called her a flat-chested tramp. And you called me a meathead and demanded the manager fire her.”
“Must have caught me on a bad day.” He replied guardedly. He knew now what Clark was talking about.
“She’s losing everything, Lex. She needed that job.” He winced just looking at Lex. He moved so slowly, as though everything hurt him. As though he were tired to his very bones.
“So basically, you’re here to make sure the big bad Luthor doesn’t pick on Lana Lang, the most innocent and pure woman of the face of the planet?”
Clark sighed. He just couldn’t deal with Lex’s moods sometimes.
“Lana Lang would never do anything wrong.” He said with thick sarcasm. “Lana Lang would never pick a fight she couldn’t get out of. Forget she treated you like trash for years. Forget she was practically in heat with that spandex loving boy scout at our wedding!”
Clark listened to Lex’s heart speed up. Though his face remained fairly calm, although twisted and bitter, he was becoming angrier and angrier. “I don’t understand why you aren’t angry with Superman instead of Lana.”
“Because Lana is a grown woman capable of making her own choices. He can do a lot of things, but I’ve never heard of any super-seduction powers. She willingly betrayed me.” Lex struggled to sit up. “And you come to me in her defense. You come to me.”
“She didn’t mean to hurt-“
“SHE BROKE MY HEART!” Lex squirmed around, trying to twist his back or get up, neither of which he could do under his own power. Clark wanted to reach forward and help, but he thought that might just make it worse. “Get the fuck out of here.”
“Lex, something’s going on. You’re sick-“
“GET OUT GET OUT GET OUT!!!” Lex screamed at him picking up a pillow and futilely throwing it in his direction. Clark stood and held his hands up in surrender. A second later a guard appeared and grabbed his arm roughly. As he was leaving, he looked back and saw Lex with his head in his hands.
Clark didn’t care how angry Lex got or how many wicked things he did. Clark had to help him. Lex was clearly in trouble, clearly angry about it, and a life was a life was a life. He had to save Lex.
***
When Adina returned that evening, the place was even quieter than she was used to. She headed first to the office to see if Lex were still working, then made her way up to the bedroom. She could have Cook send something up for them.
When, to her surprise, Lex wasn’t in the bedroom, she started to worry a little. She halted her panic with the reminder that she would be called immediately if he were rushed to the hospital. Silently, she slid off her heeled sandals and started to strip as she moved across the room. She pulled a pair of Lex’s old jeans out of the large dresser and one of her own green sweaters. The jeans were a bit snug in the rear, but otherwise quite loose. She pulled her hair into pigtails before leaving the room barefoot to find him.
She padded quietly down the hallway, trying to think of where Lex might be, wondering if he just wanted to be alone, or if he might have taken one of the cars for a drive… no. With his medication, the servants wouldn’t allow it. He’d hurt himself.
“If I were an evil genius, where would I be?” She asked herself. Then she closed her eyes. “Idiot.”
Wrapping the ends of her sleeves around her fingers, she headed towards the library. It took her a few minutes to get there, but sure enough, there was Lex, curled up with Nietzsche and a near empty bottle of scotch on the sofa. He looked up at her with forlorn, unfocused eyes. It was rare to see his face so open. She moved over to the sofa wordlessly, and curled up next to him.
“How was lunch with your friends.” His voice was lifeless. Adina kissed his straight, proud nose.
“Excellent. We talked about the new pledges, and Leah’s take-down-the-man activities. Le Eclaire Vilain is doing really well. Rob-“
“Are you serious? Le Eclaire Vilain? The Naughty Eclaire?”
Adina grinned and nodded.
“What do I expect from a K.O.K?”
“I’m not sure.” She wrapped a leg around his. Lex laid his face wearily on her shoulder. “Tell me about it. Please?”
He didn’t answer immediately. “Clark came by today.”
“The farmboy turned journalist Clark? What the hell did he want?”
“Apparently the no-tits bitch you got fired last… a little while ago. That was my ex-wife.”
“Oh.” She pursed her lips but didn’t look particularly distressed. “Good. Or am I in trouble?”
“No. But it means… Adina, love, what she said to you wasn’t personal. Well, it was, but it was personally directed at me, and not at you.” His hand slid down her thigh. “You look good in my jeans. I forgot that I owned those.”
“Come ooon.” She crooned, placing a hand over his. “That wasn’t what got you so upset.”
“I am not upset.”
“Alex.” Adina felt her lip bow. She wasn’t going to fucking cry again, dammit. She closed her eyes and felt his hand on her chin and his thumb on her cheek. “You don’t have to tell me.”
“Clark… I lost my temper. I couldn’t…” He clenched his jaw in self-disgust. “I couldn’t stand for him to see me like this.”
She squeezed his hand sympathetically and said nothing.
“And now, he’s going to make a mess of things trying to figure out why I look different from when you met him in the coffee shop.” Lex sighed and looked exasperated at an ordeal to come.
“He was very important to you.” Adina tilted her head, gauging the look on his face.
“He was my friend.”
“He was more than a friend.”
“Only to me. He never…” Lex shook his head. “But I lost him. As a friend and as whatever… I hoped we might become.”
“His loss.”
Lex shrugged. Adina was surprised to see his attitude. Not from Lex Fucken Luthor.
“His. Loss. It isn’t okay, Lex! It’s not okay that some dumb bitch cheats on you and expects you to keep taking her abuse whenever you meet in a random coffee shop. What she said wouldn’t be okay to say to you when it wasn’t okay to say to me.” Adina felt her throat tightening. “He hurt you, didn’t he? That wasn’t okay either. You don’t have to put up with people hurting you. Ever. Is that why you keep thinking I’m going to leave you? Because you have this fucked up notion that the shit people do to you is something you deserve?”
“Leave it.” He said tersely.
“No. No, I can’t.” She put her arms around him. “You don’t deserve it. And I’m not leaving you.”
“You should. I’m leaving you.” He pointed out darkly.
“So what? I have to hurt you before you end up hurting me? Fuck that.” She kissed his shoulder, which was the only thing she could reach from this position. “Fuck that. I’m not going anywhere.”
“I almost wish you would.”
Adina sat back and gave him a look that clearly asked what he was on. “I’d hurt either way. I rather be with you while I can… I’ve thought about this a lot. Not about leaving you, but about never having met you.” Adina’s eyes looked around the study, just for any other place to look. “So many things in my life have changed so quickly. And now it’s all so normal and so right. This is my life and you’re a part of it. It’s one thing if it’s taken from me, but I’m not going to tear it apart with my own hands.”
”Life is pain.” Lex muttered. He began stroking her hair. “Do you… I’m sorry.”
“Go on.”
“When you see me. Do you still… Are you-?”
“I’m terrified. Looking at you means I have to face the idea that I’m losing you. Scares the hell outta me. I’m not ready. I don’t think I ever will be. And that’s hard.” She trailed her well-manicured fingertips over the curve of his head. The skin was still soft, but stiffer than it had been. “But you’re still sexy as hell. I don’t know how you do it.”
The right corner of Lex’s mouth turned up, but it was in disbelief.
“Dude, do you know how it feels when you get horny during a tuck? It sucks.”
Lex chuckled.
“I know we haven’t been…. really active. For us anyway. Not cause…” She slid her hand underneath his shirt and started to rub against his nipple. “There wasn’t desire.”
Lex writhed against her touch. Adina’s leg was intertwined with his. She caressed his thin face.
“The will is strong, but the body is weak.”
Adina slithered on top of him and they stretched out on the plush black sofa. Already her hand was down his pants, deft fingers moving with barely there touches.
“You don’t have to.” Lex rested his head on one of the crushed velvet pillows complementing the sofa.
“You make it sound like a chore, babe.”
“I don’t want to… let you down.” He ground out tensely. Adina smirked. She knew this whole ordeal was wearing hard on an ego that hadn’t been strong to begin with, even if he was more capable than most of taking the abuse given to him.
“You don’t seem down to me.” She said coyly.
Lex looked down where Adina’s hand was stroking. A bulge was starting to grow in spite of himself. He wasn’t greatly surprised, but he would have thought by now that Adina would have gotten fed up with him. There was a time when just watching her do everyday things got him uncomfortably hard.
Her free hand gripped his shoulder, as she unbuttoned her jeans.
“Adina-“
“Shhh…” She started to shimmy out of the jeans, giving a wiggle here and there as she straddled him. Lex smiled softly and reached up to put his hands between the material and her smooth soft skin. Adina let him slide them the rest of the way down, then balanced on one leg as she turned sideways as she wiggled the legs down, revealing a silky pair of red panties. She could feel her backside jiggling, and as self-conscious as it made her in public, she felt like the ultimate feminine sex symbol with Lex lying there with a spreading grin on his face and the rising bulge in his pants. Her plump rear made him seriously hard. She bent over the couch suggestively.
“Ohhh…” Lex put one hand to his head. She swayed from side to side, giggling. He shifted his hips. “Girl, dammit. Stop torturing me.”
Adina was beaming. She stripped off her sweater, leaving the bra that disguised her still flat chest, and set to work on his belt. Lex looked a little anxious, but she slid the belt out from the loops and cracked it over her head. She smirked as he burst into laughter.
“I’m a bad girl.” She said with a mock schoolgirl voice.
“I wouldn’t have anything to do with a good girl.” Lex declared. She set her hands on his narrow hips and jerked his pants and boxers down.
“There’s what I want.” She stroked the base of his upright cock. And gave it a little kiss. She started to get up, then swore. “Fuck. Hold on.”
Lex pointed. “There’s a bathroom over there.”
“I don’t have to piss. I need some fucking lube.”
“I guessed that much. There’s some hand lotion. And maybe lube, actually. I have no idea where I have it stashed in this place anymore. About as many places as I have guns.” He paused. “Well, probably more guns, but still.”
Adina came trotting back with the hand lotion, shaking her head. “You are something else.”
“No lube? Sorry.”
“No, but there was a gun in there, you crazy man.” She gave him a peck on the lips and slipped off her panties. She was fairly hard of her own accord, but that was an issue all unto itself. She crawled back onto the couch and let him pull her closer. Gently, she stroked his cock with hand lotion while he put some on his fingers and reached between her legs with two fingers. “Mmmm.”
Lex concentrated on making her squirm. This had always been a particular hobby of his, making guys who thought they were tops wriggle around on his fingers. Her touches on her cock were too light to make him come too soon, thankfully. He wasn’t sure how many times he could come, although he remembered fondly their days of marathon lovemaking on every surface in the castle. After a moment she grabbed his wrist. He pulled them out and watched as she straddled him then wrapped her fingers around his shirt, as she met his lips with an openmouthed kiss. Then slowly, slowly lowered herself onto him and began to ride.
Lex wasn’t quite sure if she still wanted him touching her cock, but he figured they could talk it out later. Grabbing the hand lotion, he began to gently pump her erection, concentrating on timing his administrations with her own rocking. She made a throaty squeal and clutched his shirt even tighter.
”Oh, god Alex!” She cried, riding him faster. Lex clutched her arm with his right hand with an intense look of concentration on his face. “I love you!”
Definitely okay to touch the cock for now. He kept going and let her take control, something he was not accustomed to. Although he couldn’t resist bucking his hips along with her, trying to push farther, hold on a little longer so she could come first…
As Adina erupted over his shirt, she let out a joyful howl that certainly let the servants know what they were up to in the library. Then Lex let go with a moan of his own. She leaned on his chest, panting for a few minutes before she stretched up to let him out. Lex laughed softly a she curled up on top of him, ignoring the sticky semen between them and rested her head on his shoulder.
“What? I made it, I can lay in it.” She said, unfazed.
“You’re really the best woman I’ve ever been with.” He replied seriously.
She smiled and let him pet her hair. “It just seems like that since we’re perfect for each other.”
“Seems so.” He kissed her head. “Sorry that was so short.”
“Short nothing, you’re good with your hands. All had a rollicking good time, and that’s all it needs… you know you’re the only person I’ve willingly cuddled with? Granted sometimes, I used to just fall asleep after and some spooning would happen… you know. But never on purpose. It never felt this good.”
“I’ve never been a cuddler either. Or one to stay the night, even. I’m more likely to flee the scene directly after..” Lex admitted. “Except with my boarding school roommate.”
“OoooOOOooo.” Adina teased.
“I was a little slut.” He trailed the clean part of his hand around her face.
“I had my share of partners too. You know that.”
“I just wonder how I went through that many women… and men looking for the right person and I never found you until now.”
Adina nuzzled her face into Lex’s shoulder. He never told her he loved her. She suspected that with some of his emotional problems, he didn’t know how, or maybe he couldn’t. But she could tell when he said things like this, did the things that he did for her, that he loved her more than he could have said, even if he could find the words. And that was a very good feeling. She’d never felt particularly loved growing up either.
“I don’t think… I wanted to be found. For a long time.”
Lex mused on this. “We should get cleaned up before I fall asleep.”
Adina nodded and moved to help him get up. She found, to his embarrassment, that Lex was a little weak in the knees, and she didn’t want to ask if that had been why he was curled up and not working when she found him earlier. Maybe it had been the sex. In either case, they moved slowly towards one of the larger bathrooms so they could soak in the large tub.
She let Lex sit on the rim as she started the water, and he slowly began to unbutton his shirt. She kissed him before grabbing a towel and walking out for a moment. She would ask the cook to have something brought up for them. Lex would definitely be too tired to have a big dinner.
Lex sat pensively on the edge of the tub, staring down at his thin, frail form, wondering how anyone could find that attractive. Not that he’d ever found himself greatly attractive, or any of the major players in his love life had either. Helen had certainly been the most vocal of her distaste for his looks, for touching his head and looking at his hairless body. He should have known that she wasn’t that drawn to his mind. Most people, he was sure, wanted him for something. To use him. To use him up? To get money from or to replace them when they grew old or to serve as their dark shadow so they could be the good one. To make their old boyfriend jealous. For money money money.
He tested the water and reached for the cabinet to get some fragrant bath salts. He slipped off the tub and fell hard on his butt. With an eye roll, he crawled over to the cabinet, opened it, and selected a lavender rose. He crawled over, refusing to acknowledge to himself that he was indeed crawling about like an infant, and poured some in. Then crawled into the tub himself to mix them.
“Hey, babe.” Adina returned and took off her wig before slipping in herself. “We’ll have something to eat in a bit.”
Her toes sought out his and there was some laughter and giggling in the tub as they washed and kissed on one another. When the food came, Adina remained playful, feeding him small bits and allowing him to feed her. He didn’t eat much, but he tried for her, and that made her happy. That he was still trying, still cared enough to try.
After slipping out of the bath, Lex was now so exhausted, Adina wasn’t sure she could handle the weight herself, so Lex let her call a servant to help. The man was tight-lipped and business-like about helping Lex to bed and nodded to him before leaving their bedroom, as though this were an everyday occurrence and nothing needed to be said.
“I’m not sure I pay them enough.”
“You pay them a lot.”
”They put up with me. They deserve it.” Lex countered. He stretched out on his bed in his black silk pajamas and looked at the clock. “It’s so early. You can’t be tired.”
“Well, no.” Adina snuggled next to him. Lex had gotten her a pair of blue silk pajamas which matched his own. “But I’m certainly not tired of your company, so I’ll stay with you.”
“That has to be boring for you.” He complained. Adina knew that asking Lex to start acting like a sick person would be completely in vain.
“I’ll get a book when you go to sleep. I should read more anyway. But I’ll be here when you wake up, Alex. I will be as long as you continue to wake up.”
“If that’s your promise, then I think I’ll just have to keep doing so until you leave me.” He gave her a flirty smirk as though he had control over that and all the factors in their lives threatening their relationship.
“I never will. You’ll see.” She scrunched up her nose, and he chucked her chin with his fingers. “What do you think of the new Revolutionary War arch?”
“Unbelievably idiotic.” Lex said without hesitation or note of the switch of conversation to comic books. “Waylon Weir would never reveal his secret identity like that. It goes against years of characterization.”
“I know. But he’s Danny’s bitch now. He does what the plot demands” Adina replied.
“That makes for a sad sad creature.”
They talked comics for awhile until Lex couldn’t keep his eyes open much longer, and Adina just watched him, rubbing the back of his head gently until he fell asleep. She stepped away for a few minutes and fetched his Nietzsche from the library to read while he slept.