a short history of the important events of my life in regards to food and my consumption of it

[labyrinthiform]

This is going to get ranty and long-winded very quickly, so I am cutting this.
I mostly just want to say this because I feel like telling my friends about these problems that I have will help me get over them because I truly do want to get better and I have had trouble doing that in the past without people keeping me accountable.
Don't feel obligated

Comments

[vantrika]

Honey, I gave you a phone number. That is probably your best bet at help right now, the path available to you that shows the greatest personal strength.

I've been thinking about that, lately--personal strength, that is, and how it relates to hardship. I've pretty much come to the conclusion that hardship only makes you a stronger, "better," deeper person once you come out the other side (or at least slide along that scale).

It sounds like your sister is toxic to you and you need to just tell her that you can't be part of her eating disorder support anymore.

Damn, you are hot. You have always had a body that other girls desperately want. (I think that's why girls will comment on stomach-squishiness--they notice because it makes them feel better about themselves).

i don't actually want it to go away right now because i feel like i need it.
OK, then, consider; what is this providing for me right now, what does it have that I need, and how can I replace it? How can I do those dorky things like join sports to gain self-confidence

[quirkyquills]

Just a note-- you probably already know this, but the only reason Lexie's the only commenter is because the rest of us don't really know what to say.

Also, re: Damn, you are hot. Agreed! The comment about the stomach-squishiness is also seconded! I feel weird saying this because I don't know most people at TJ, but I feel like a super-competitive school is a breeding ground for self-destructive (and destructive to others, as well) behavior. That's why I've always hated the "TJ attitude"; there are just so many people at school who deserve to think better of themselves. In any case, I feel like a lot of unpleasant comments that people make about others are just a projection of their own self-hate onto others.

We do care about you ♥ I don't really know what I can do to support you, but I'll do anything you need :)