Story in the Making [18/?]
This is the first chapter that leads directly into the next chapter. As in, this isn't the end of this scene, but I dont' want to jump into 2k+ chapters just yet.
Previous Chapter
It was days before the spoke again. And it wasn’t for a lack of trying, either. Between all the work that they had to do and the amount of exhaustion that they felt every day, it was hard to find time to simply talk to one another They were so used to talking with one another about any and everything, open about everything they were feeling and thinking and so not to have that outlet, left them both…unsatisfied, for lack of a better term.
But the reason that they weren’t speaking were different on each part. Youngjae was simply too mentally exhausted to say anything, to do anything after rigorous schedules and simply rest as much as he possibly could. Daehyun, on the other hand, was unsure and felt awkward. The awkwardness was obvious to Youngjae even if he wasn’t aware of it on a conscious level.
It left them both feeling uncomfortable with each other when they were the only ones in a room together. And so they both would go about their business as though the other wasn’t there and…it didn’t work.
Their first day off in a long time would find Youngjae on the roof, laying down and letting the setting sun wash over him. It was warm and soothing as it touched his pale skin, not tanning it, but nearly soothing him into a light doze if not for the thoughts that were weighing on his mind. While he was up in a place that he always found safe and to be a sanctuary, he wasn’t smiling like he usually would. The warmth, the peace and quiet, the sounds of the city echoing beneath and around him, didn’t make him feel happy. It only added to the stress that he felt building up without his best friend there to help ease it all out of him. Daehyun always had an amazing ear and would always know the right things to say to the younger man to placate him. He never had worry of judgment, either. Except, that wasn’t the case as of late and Youngjae couldn’t figure out what changed between their relationship to make Youngjae feel so isolated despite sharing a room with someone he considered more than just his best friend and loved too much for him to even consider.
When the door opened, it startled Youngjae out of his blank and mindless state, sitting up to look over it and even the sight of his best friend walking over didn’t bring a smile to his face. Daehyun should have noticed right then and there that what he had been doing was causing his friend stress.
Youngjae did notice the blanket in hand, though. Without an inquiry, Daehyun explained what it was for. “The nights are getting chilly…” It was a soft tone, almost shy and it wasn’t often that Daehyun felt shy, or at least never did he seem shy to Youngjae.
That was enough to make the younger male smile. Not the shyness in which Daehyun spoke to him with, but the consideration that the man always held for him even when they weren’t on the best of terms.
“Thank you.” He spoke softly to his friend and accepted the blanket. He set it aside to be available when he was cold. “Will you stay here?” He asked the elder man because it didn’t look like Daehyun had any intention of sitting beside him. His eyes were wide as he glanced up at the man that he trusted with his life and often confided in with things that he would never utter to another soul for the rest of his life. He wanted his friend back and whatever happened between them to change and to just go away like it never happened in the first place.
How could Daehyun say no to that face--to his precious boy? With those eyes that so often held something akin to contempt, cruel amusement that often caused more pain for those at the receiving end than the man would ever realize, so oblivious to how his words could cut and hurt and yet were so expressive with Daehyun in more ways than any of his victims realized.
“Yeah, of course.” The words leave his mouth before he could help himself, though he knew that they were the right ones, given how Youngjae’s lips turned upward into a smile, one that shined even in his eyes and he also knew that he’d never regret giving in to his best friend’s every whim. Not when Youngjae always looked so grateful.
Silence fell over them quickly, the sun setting completely and basking them in darkness that used to be so comforting as long as they were in each other’s presence. They didn’t always talk, no, but they weren’t always so awkwardly silent and Youngjae would give anything to change that, make it like it once used to.
“We should talk about what happened.” Youngjae stated, leaving no room for argument and yet when Daehyun looked over at him, he saw the tint on his cheeks and how the younger one refused to look at him. It wasn’t often that would be the case. Youngjae never felt embarrassed around him, did he? Daehyun couldn’t recall a single moment where the younger man couldn’t look him in the eye, couldn’t face him if they needed to talk. It worried him but he couldn’t bring himself to question it.
“What do you want me to say?” Daehyun breathed out as he directed his gaze back to the sky, anywhere but at his best friend even though he had just been considering how Youngjae had never done that to him before.
“Anything.” There was a growing frustration in Youngjae’s tone and Daehyun chose to ignore it
“But I have nothing-“
“Daehyun!” Youngjae quickly sat up, pulling his knees to his chest and then wrapped his arms around them. “Don’t fucking-“ He stopped himself. He had never cussed like that to his hyung. The sound of such a crude word leaving his best friend made Daehyun realize what he had been doing wrong. He shouldn’t have been ignoring his best friend under the guise of being too busy or whatever he claimed. He shouldn’t have done so much…
“You kissed me.”
Youngjae’s gaze was sharp as it turned to his best friend and his eyes were wide. There was confusion and a lack of comprehension that Daehyun wouldn’t look to. He could feel the younger man’s gaze boring into him and he knew that he should look to him, he knew that he should sit up and face him like a man, but he couldn’t bring himself to, not while he was still processing the act that had put them in this predicament to begin with.
“N-no, I didn’t.”
Daehyun felt his own heart plummet at those words because it wasn’t right for Youngjae to deny such a thing to him.
Youngjae didn’t understand, though. There had not been one time that Youngjae’s lips had at any point touched-“Oh.” When they had been up on the roof a few weeks back, Youngjae had been so upset that he had wanted to express affection and gratitude for his best friend always being there. He had kissed him and he didn’t regret it, he just…hadn’t seen it as anything more than two friends sharing affection.
“Yeah…” Daehyun was still laying down and he had no intention of getting up, even as he felt his cheeks flare up. He felt the desire to run, to go back to the dorm and hide in their room, but that would be childish and he was not a child. He could face this, he knew he could. Well, he knew he had to if there was any chance of saving their friendship.
Next Chapter
Previous Chapter
It was days before the spoke again. And it wasn’t for a lack of trying, either. Between all the work that they had to do and the amount of exhaustion that they felt every day, it was hard to find time to simply talk to one another They were so used to talking with one another about any and everything, open about everything they were feeling and thinking and so not to have that outlet, left them both…unsatisfied, for lack of a better term.
But the reason that they weren’t speaking were different on each part. Youngjae was simply too mentally exhausted to say anything, to do anything after rigorous schedules and simply rest as much as he possibly could. Daehyun, on the other hand, was unsure and felt awkward. The awkwardness was obvious to Youngjae even if he wasn’t aware of it on a conscious level.
It left them both feeling uncomfortable with each other when they were the only ones in a room together. And so they both would go about their business as though the other wasn’t there and…it didn’t work.
Their first day off in a long time would find Youngjae on the roof, laying down and letting the setting sun wash over him. It was warm and soothing as it touched his pale skin, not tanning it, but nearly soothing him into a light doze if not for the thoughts that were weighing on his mind. While he was up in a place that he always found safe and to be a sanctuary, he wasn’t smiling like he usually would. The warmth, the peace and quiet, the sounds of the city echoing beneath and around him, didn’t make him feel happy. It only added to the stress that he felt building up without his best friend there to help ease it all out of him. Daehyun always had an amazing ear and would always know the right things to say to the younger man to placate him. He never had worry of judgment, either. Except, that wasn’t the case as of late and Youngjae couldn’t figure out what changed between their relationship to make Youngjae feel so isolated despite sharing a room with someone he considered more than just his best friend and loved too much for him to even consider.
When the door opened, it startled Youngjae out of his blank and mindless state, sitting up to look over it and even the sight of his best friend walking over didn’t bring a smile to his face. Daehyun should have noticed right then and there that what he had been doing was causing his friend stress.
Youngjae did notice the blanket in hand, though. Without an inquiry, Daehyun explained what it was for. “The nights are getting chilly…” It was a soft tone, almost shy and it wasn’t often that Daehyun felt shy, or at least never did he seem shy to Youngjae.
That was enough to make the younger male smile. Not the shyness in which Daehyun spoke to him with, but the consideration that the man always held for him even when they weren’t on the best of terms.
“Thank you.” He spoke softly to his friend and accepted the blanket. He set it aside to be available when he was cold. “Will you stay here?” He asked the elder man because it didn’t look like Daehyun had any intention of sitting beside him. His eyes were wide as he glanced up at the man that he trusted with his life and often confided in with things that he would never utter to another soul for the rest of his life. He wanted his friend back and whatever happened between them to change and to just go away like it never happened in the first place.
How could Daehyun say no to that face--to his precious boy? With those eyes that so often held something akin to contempt, cruel amusement that often caused more pain for those at the receiving end than the man would ever realize, so oblivious to how his words could cut and hurt and yet were so expressive with Daehyun in more ways than any of his victims realized.
“Yeah, of course.” The words leave his mouth before he could help himself, though he knew that they were the right ones, given how Youngjae’s lips turned upward into a smile, one that shined even in his eyes and he also knew that he’d never regret giving in to his best friend’s every whim. Not when Youngjae always looked so grateful.
Silence fell over them quickly, the sun setting completely and basking them in darkness that used to be so comforting as long as they were in each other’s presence. They didn’t always talk, no, but they weren’t always so awkwardly silent and Youngjae would give anything to change that, make it like it once used to.
“We should talk about what happened.” Youngjae stated, leaving no room for argument and yet when Daehyun looked over at him, he saw the tint on his cheeks and how the younger one refused to look at him. It wasn’t often that would be the case. Youngjae never felt embarrassed around him, did he? Daehyun couldn’t recall a single moment where the younger man couldn’t look him in the eye, couldn’t face him if they needed to talk. It worried him but he couldn’t bring himself to question it.
“What do you want me to say?” Daehyun breathed out as he directed his gaze back to the sky, anywhere but at his best friend even though he had just been considering how Youngjae had never done that to him before.
“Anything.” There was a growing frustration in Youngjae’s tone and Daehyun chose to ignore it
“But I have nothing-“
“Daehyun!” Youngjae quickly sat up, pulling his knees to his chest and then wrapped his arms around them. “Don’t fucking-“ He stopped himself. He had never cussed like that to his hyung. The sound of such a crude word leaving his best friend made Daehyun realize what he had been doing wrong. He shouldn’t have been ignoring his best friend under the guise of being too busy or whatever he claimed. He shouldn’t have done so much…
“You kissed me.”
Youngjae’s gaze was sharp as it turned to his best friend and his eyes were wide. There was confusion and a lack of comprehension that Daehyun wouldn’t look to. He could feel the younger man’s gaze boring into him and he knew that he should look to him, he knew that he should sit up and face him like a man, but he couldn’t bring himself to, not while he was still processing the act that had put them in this predicament to begin with.
“N-no, I didn’t.”
Daehyun felt his own heart plummet at those words because it wasn’t right for Youngjae to deny such a thing to him.
Youngjae didn’t understand, though. There had not been one time that Youngjae’s lips had at any point touched-“Oh.” When they had been up on the roof a few weeks back, Youngjae had been so upset that he had wanted to express affection and gratitude for his best friend always being there. He had kissed him and he didn’t regret it, he just…hadn’t seen it as anything more than two friends sharing affection.
“Yeah…” Daehyun was still laying down and he had no intention of getting up, even as he felt his cheeks flare up. He felt the desire to run, to go back to the dorm and hide in their room, but that would be childish and he was not a child. He could face this, he knew he could. Well, he knew he had to if there was any chance of saving their friendship.
Next Chapter