For much of the afternoon and evening, I've been thinking of what I might post here. Now that I'm finally at a computer, I find my self too drained and my head hurting too much to write even half of it
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It isn't our home. Hasn't been for over 3 years now. I don't know why it is so very hard to let go, when I KNOW it isn't our home and I KNOW I can't afford to keep it, and I KNOW I only hurt when I go there, All this is true
and there is no good reason for me to fall apart over the sale This is not. Change, any change can be emotional.
By the way, feelings have nothing to do with reason anyway.
Also, you put your finger on why it's hard to let go: The house represents a connection with Greg to you. It is not THE connection you have to him, but it is one connection, and so of course letting it go hurts and is difficult. This is ok. These feelings want and need to be acknowledged and permitted as part of the action of letting go of this.
It is, however, more than a connection to him - it is also a big drain and weight on you. If you can accept what it is, what it has been, and what it cannot be - it cannot make you be any closer to him, it cannot rewind time for you - then perhaps letting go may become a little less hard. Sometimes, however, the right things to do are just that: hard. They're still right, though - and I'm sure Greg would encourage you to release this particular connection to him, hold on to the real one, and ease your burdens. It's worth releasing, and I hope you will soon feel the energy drain it's weight on you is ease and your life improve. *hugs*
*hugs* I'm so sorry. All I can do is send you hugs and healing thoughts. I'll be thinking of you, especially next Thursday. I can't even imagine how hard this is for you.
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and there is no good reason for me to fall apart over the sale This is not. Change, any change can be emotional.
By the way, feelings have nothing to do with reason anyway.
*hugs*
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Also, you put your finger on why it's hard to let go: The house represents a connection with Greg to you. It is not THE connection you have to him, but it is one connection, and so of course letting it go hurts and is difficult. This is ok. These feelings want and need to be acknowledged and permitted as part of the action of letting go of this.
It is, however, more than a connection to him - it is also a big drain and weight on you. If you can accept what it is, what it has been, and what it cannot be - it cannot make you be any closer to him, it cannot rewind time for you - then perhaps letting go may become a little less hard.
Sometimes, however, the right things to do are just that: hard. They're still right, though - and I'm sure Greg would encourage you to release this particular connection to him, hold on to the real one, and ease your burdens. It's worth releasing, and I hope you will soon feel the energy drain it's weight on you is ease and your life improve. *hugs*
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*hugs* and thank you
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