Fanfiction: Enjoy the Silence: Chapter 4 (Loki's pov)

Nov 03, 2011 11:26

Title: Enjoy the Silence: Chapter 4 (Loki's pov)
Pairings: Mako x Loki
Fandom: Deadman x ex-Sugar/Konig
Rating: PG
Author: Eden, lieburied
Summary: They grew up together with different ideals and teachings that torn them apart, but there's one thing they both learned growing up.
Notes: Collaboration with Miko, nelly_d, who is providing Mako’s parts. I’m excited about this! I haven’t done a collaboration in forever.
Chapters: #1 (Mako’s pov)
#3 (Mako's pov)



If you can see these stars, give me some sign that you’re safe…

How could I expect to magically see some sign from him when it had been so long since we’d parted ways? I was little more than a selfish teenager, who hadn’t fully understood what I desired from life. It hadn’t been until it was far too late when the gravity of what I’d done had fully struck me. I glanced down, realizing that my reminiscence had nearly caused me to walk past my hotel. Pausing outside the heavy gothic doors, I couldn’t help feeling as if I should have kept walking. What is it about this city that keeps bringing these feelings up? Whatever it was, I wanted it to either reveal itself or stop pulling at my strings. I would never resign myself to being merely fate’s puppet.

I sighed, pausing open the doors to the hotel. If nothing else, a strong drink and a hot bath would help push away the jumble of emotions inside me that had been partially born of paranoia and jetlag. Father had always suggested alcohol for burning away unwanted memories. He would have known much better than any other after all. The entire world was filled with unwanted memories for our patriarch. His children were the first to be burned away in the bonfire inside his heart. I worried that someday my own heart would be as blackened as his own. Was that where I was headed?

The hotel was more beautiful than I had hoped from the pictures the travel agency had shown me. Although the beauty had been what I’d hoped for, I was looking for inspiration of a different kind tonight. A pair of young women, maids I’d assume, lead me to my room. I wondered if this was how they treated every guest. They moved about the room, fluffing the pillows and chilling a bottle of champagne. I allowed the taller woman to pour a glass for me, taking a small thrill at seeing her hand tremble as I spoke her name. As lovely as she was, I would not be spending the night in her company.

The women were dismissed after small talk and a second glass of champagne. No time was wasted once I was alone in getting the bath that I’d wanted. I washed away the day slowly, letting the water soothe away the aches that had settled into my body. Once I had made myself presentable, the walk down to the bar was a welcomed distraction. Candlelight welcomed me as I made my way into the darkened room. The scent of wine and roses hung in the air rather than the scent of stale cigarettes. This was a unique change from what I’d come to expect from an establishment that sold alcohol. There was only one place that I could have expected to find such elegance, but I was fairly sure that Asagi-san hadn’t branched out of Japan just yet.

I ordered a glass of red wine once I’d found my way into a darkened corner. I wanted to take in the environment, rather than truly participate in it. It was romantic in an ultimately saddening way to be sitting alone surrounded by candlelight and roses. In that moment, I found myself wishing that there was someone I could share it with. Where was the love that I’d always avoided, but secretly yearned for? I knew why I couldn’t have it. I knew why I avoided it in the people I took into my bed. Even so, that didn’t offer a solution to the problem. I wish I could ask you…

loki, mako x loki

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