[fic] KyoXRuki - Fanboy Number 1 - 1/?
Title: Fanboy Number 1
Author: himrahid
Chapters: Chapter 1/?
Genre: angst, fluff
Rating/warnings: Overall NC-17 for graphic sex in later chapters
Band(s): Dir en grey, Gazette
Pairing(s): KyoXRuki
Summary: Kyo and Ruki keep hurting themselves and each other. Will they ever be happy? <- I suck at summaries, but I wrote one, go me!
Disclaimer: Not mine, not mine. x-x
Comments: I was bullied into writing this ... but then started to love it. XD
“I’m home, babe.“ Kyo slipped out of his shoes and made his way towards the bedroom, sure to find his lover there as he did every night and indeed there he was lying on the bed and smiling in that way that made Kyo want to just ... take him.
“Hey ...“ Ruki’s voice was husky with desire as he reached up to pull the other down onto himself.
Kyo crushed their lips together in a harsh kiss, silencing the other quite effectively. He never failed to marvel at just how delicate Ruki felt under his touch, how soft he was, how perfect.
Kyo himself was far from perfect with all of his scars, visible and invisible, and inevitably whenever he was sleeping with Rukit it made him snap.
No matter how often he told himself to keep it gentle he simply couldn’t - almost like a part of him wanted to break the younger man, like a mirror of himself.
He didn’t hesitate and pulled down Ruki’s pants in one swift motion, not even able to take the time to prepare Ruki properly before thrusting into him.
Hadn’t he been too busy attacking Ruki’s neck he might have seen tears well up in his lover’s eyes.
It was over almost as soon as it had started, leaving Ruki exhausted and hurt - as usual.
He didn’t even know why he was doing this to himself, why he allowed the other to hurt him like this ... but one look at Kyo was enough and he knew why he was willing to go through this.
The other vocalist needed him, didn’t he?
Ever since they had met that fateful night three months ago Ruki had felt that the other needed him just as much as Ruki needed him. Idol and fan, the perfect symbiosis.
He would have to swallow his tears and pride and smile for Kyo in order to give him back at least some of the happiness the world had stolen from him.
“I-I’ll just take a shower. Be right back,“ he murmured, before escaping to the shelter of the bathroom.
He broke down under the water, sobbing like there was no tomorrow. Why was it that Kyo couldn’t even look at him after they’d had sex most of the time? Why was it always like this; quick, violent and without any sense of even affection, let alone love?
He didn’t know how long he spent there but by the time he was done he realised the water had been cold all along and he was shivering.
He dried himself off as quickly as possible before he changed into his oversized PJs and waddled back towards the bedroom, feeling his teeth clatter.
He slipped under the covers beside Kyo, hugging himself in a desperate attempt to get some warmth. Snuggling up to Kyo was completely out of question, of course, and the other was probably asleep already anyway and-
“Fuck! What have you done in there? Baby ...“ Kyo turned around and immediately wrapped his arms around his lover. “You’re cold even when you’re just lying beside me. Ruki ...“
He couldn’t help but worry. The kid was his weakness, definitely.
He could feel Ruki relax in his arms and eventually the clattering of the blonde’s teeth were replaced by his slow and steady breathing, indicating that he had fallen asleep.
Kyo smiled at Ruki’s face, which reminded him of child’s in his sleep. That was how he loved him the most - innocent and cute.
“I can’t help it,“ he whispered. “You’re all I want because you’re everything I’m not.“
Author: himrahid
Chapters: Chapter 1/?
Genre: angst, fluff
Rating/warnings: Overall NC-17 for graphic sex in later chapters
Band(s): Dir en grey, Gazette
Pairing(s): KyoXRuki
Summary: Kyo and Ruki keep hurting themselves and each other. Will they ever be happy? <- I suck at summaries, but I wrote one, go me!
Disclaimer: Not mine, not mine. x-x
Comments: I was bullied into writing this ... but then started to love it. XD
“I’m home, babe.“ Kyo slipped out of his shoes and made his way towards the bedroom, sure to find his lover there as he did every night and indeed there he was lying on the bed and smiling in that way that made Kyo want to just ... take him.
“Hey ...“ Ruki’s voice was husky with desire as he reached up to pull the other down onto himself.
Kyo crushed their lips together in a harsh kiss, silencing the other quite effectively. He never failed to marvel at just how delicate Ruki felt under his touch, how soft he was, how perfect.
Kyo himself was far from perfect with all of his scars, visible and invisible, and inevitably whenever he was sleeping with Rukit it made him snap.
No matter how often he told himself to keep it gentle he simply couldn’t - almost like a part of him wanted to break the younger man, like a mirror of himself.
He didn’t hesitate and pulled down Ruki’s pants in one swift motion, not even able to take the time to prepare Ruki properly before thrusting into him.
Hadn’t he been too busy attacking Ruki’s neck he might have seen tears well up in his lover’s eyes.
It was over almost as soon as it had started, leaving Ruki exhausted and hurt - as usual.
He didn’t even know why he was doing this to himself, why he allowed the other to hurt him like this ... but one look at Kyo was enough and he knew why he was willing to go through this.
The other vocalist needed him, didn’t he?
Ever since they had met that fateful night three months ago Ruki had felt that the other needed him just as much as Ruki needed him. Idol and fan, the perfect symbiosis.
He would have to swallow his tears and pride and smile for Kyo in order to give him back at least some of the happiness the world had stolen from him.
“I-I’ll just take a shower. Be right back,“ he murmured, before escaping to the shelter of the bathroom.
He broke down under the water, sobbing like there was no tomorrow. Why was it that Kyo couldn’t even look at him after they’d had sex most of the time? Why was it always like this; quick, violent and without any sense of even affection, let alone love?
He didn’t know how long he spent there but by the time he was done he realised the water had been cold all along and he was shivering.
He dried himself off as quickly as possible before he changed into his oversized PJs and waddled back towards the bedroom, feeling his teeth clatter.
He slipped under the covers beside Kyo, hugging himself in a desperate attempt to get some warmth. Snuggling up to Kyo was completely out of question, of course, and the other was probably asleep already anyway and-
“Fuck! What have you done in there? Baby ...“ Kyo turned around and immediately wrapped his arms around his lover. “You’re cold even when you’re just lying beside me. Ruki ...“
He couldn’t help but worry. The kid was his weakness, definitely.
He could feel Ruki relax in his arms and eventually the clattering of the blonde’s teeth were replaced by his slow and steady breathing, indicating that he had fallen asleep.
Kyo smiled at Ruki’s face, which reminded him of child’s in his sleep. That was how he loved him the most - innocent and cute.
“I can’t help it,“ he whispered. “You’re all I want because you’re everything I’m not.“