[fic] her bark is worse than her bite
fic: her bark is worse than her bite (lightning always flashes brighter than the sun)
fandom: btvs
pairing: buffy/tara; dawn
recipient: : red_satin_doll for the October meme
word count: 1860
prompt: thunder/courage; tara being as flawed and human, not a golden goddess of perfect wisdom and forgiveness; keyverse okay
setting: : sometime in the s6/7 range; domesticity abounds
a/n: if the characterization seems a bit off, it's probably because the only way i can conceptualize buffy in a long-term relationship with tara is if she is a much softer and more open sort of person
[Bad at something? You? Only mini-golf and Monopoly because you're too nice.]Buffy ran home from patrol through a thunderstorm, colliding through the door a soaking mess to the smell of something burning.
Damnit, Dawn, she muttered under her breath, stripping out of her jacket and shoes at the door. Dawn?! she called up the stairs, still dripping on the doormat.
Already in bed, Buff. Tara’s voice came from the kitchen, muffled and out of breath.
Anyone else here?
Just me… Tara’s voice trailed off and Buffy can’t hear the rest of her statement, but it’s the answer she wants.
On the mat, she deposits her jeans, socks, t-shirt, and cardigan in a soaking heap, wandering to the kitchen in her underwear and an old camisole she had put on to keep her warm and not at all for its fashion - the damn thing had a large brown stain that Buffy hoped was hot chocolate or the remains of a burrito, but sneakingly knew must be blood or demonic goop from some long-forgotten skirmish.
Leaving behind moist footprints and little droplets of water from her hair and shirt, Buffy made her way to the kitchen and the foul stench.
What did Dawn burn this time? Buffy started before gasping. The drapes above the sink were blackened and there was a heavy smell of smoke all through the kitchen, Tara was sitting in a mess of soggy paper towels and what looked like a broken bowl on the floor, nursing a hand that was bright red.
It wasn’t Dawn, Tara said before Buffy could whirl out of the room and lash into her sister. She sighed. It was my fault. I burned dinner, threw it in the sink and the curtains caught fire and then I dropped the salad bowl and stubbed my toe and burned my hand and then…
Tara stopped as if there was something far worse that she didn’t want Buffy to know. Buffy knelt gingerly on the ground next to her, carefully brushing away the larger pieces of broken ceramic. It’s okay. Whatever it is, it’s okay.
Tara looked up at her, eyes full of tears, And then I yelled at Dawn and sent her to bed without dinner.
Buffy stared for a minute, unable to say anything, still taking in the general upheaval around her.
I’m terrible, aren’t I? I’m the worst. Tara’s lip quivered.
I just can’t believe that Dawn just… went to bed! How long ago was this?
About thirty minutes or so.
And she didn’t fight with you at all?
Tara shook her head, fresh tears falling down her face. I think I scared her. Oh! Buffy! Poor Dawn! I didn’t mean to lose my temper like that.
Hey, it’s okay. I yell at her all the time.
She’s going to hate me now.
She’s fifteen, she’ll get over it. And she loves you. You hung the moon in the sky just for her.
Tara rubbed her nose with the back of her hand and sniffed. I was going to take up a sandwich or something… but my hand… she gestured helplessly.
I’ll make a sandwich and take it up, but first let’s bandage that hand okay?
The next few minutes were relatively quiet. Buffy got the first aid kit from under the sink and applied the right ointments and wrapped Tara’s hand delicately. Then Tara swept up the ceramic with a wave of her hand and sheepish shrug. While Buffy made Dawn a sandwich (peanut butter and salami), Tara put milk, chocolate syrup, and a banana in the blender. The banana looked like it was on its last leg, but Dawn wouldn’t notice. Buffy grabbed a bag of chips from the pantry and took the plate and cup up to Dawn.
She knocked mostly because her hands were full.
Why are you naked?
I was wet. Here, have some dinner. Buffy put the sandwich, chips, and smoothie on Dawn’s desk. You okay?
Dawn shrugged, I’m really sorry. You didn’t have to bring this up.
Why are you sorry?
Dawn sighed loudly and handed her sister a paper from her bed, wrinkled and official looking. I’m failing Geometry.
And PE?
Yeah, okay. And PE.
Buffy stared down at the paper in her hand, suddenly feeling a wave of exhaustion settling on her shoulders.
I’m really sorry, Buffy. I’ll ask for extra credit and maybe Willow can tutor me and I promise not to ditch PE anymore even if my teacher smells and is always picking on me.
Buffy set the paper down on the desk next to the sandwich and shook her head. We’ll talk about it in the morning. I don’t want to put any pressure on Willow…
Dawn threw herself into Buffy, hugging her hard and sniffling, Tara hates me, doesn’t she?
What?!
She got a call from the school and I promised her that I wouldn’t be any trouble this year and I really am sorry and it’s all my fault the kitchen burned down I said I would watch the stove and I didn’t because I -
Dawn stop. Buffy roughly pushed Dawn into her desk chair and then smoothed back her long hair gently as if to make up for lurching out of the hug that her sister so desperately seemed to need, We’ll talk about it in the morning. Tara doesn’t hate you. I’m tired. Please eat your sandwich and do your homework and then sleep okay?
Dawn wiped her eyes and nodded.
At the door, Buffy looked back at her dejected sister moping in her chair, Tara isn’t mad at you, okay? I promise. She loves you.
I just… I don’t want anyone else to leave.
The haunted look in Dawn’s face made Buffy feel old - so old. She was much too young to be responsible for something so young and so fragile.
No one is leaving tonight, it’s too wet outside.
After throwing on a pair of sweats and a mostly-clean shirt, Buffy made her way back downstairs, finding Tara starting a load of laundry in the basement. I could have done that.
You and Dawn needed to talk. And if I had left the clothes there any longer something was going to start growing on them. Did you swim home?
Buffy laughed and hugged Tara from behind. Are you okay?
Tara sighed and leaned into Buffy, It was like an epic day from hell. I almost called in the troops to do research. Like, surely a day can’t be this bad without there being something supernatural at work.
What happened?
What didn’t happen?! Tara banged the lid of the washer closed and drew away from Buffy to pace across the basement. Dawn was late to school and then I was late to my first class and the professor called me on the carpet like I was some kind of delinquent. I spilled coffee on my jeans. I got a C on a paper I was sure I aced. I noticed a piece of lettuce stuck in my teeth at least two hours after I ate lunch and I had a meeting with my advisor in the meantime. And then I nearly burned down the kitchen and yelled at Dawn for no reason.
Buffy let the silence sink for a moment before she said cheerfully, Dawn thinks this is all because she’s failing Geometry.
And PE, Tara said sullenly. I should have noticed.
Why should YOU have noticed? I’m her sister and I didn’t have a clue.
Tara shrugged, You’re busy.
Buffy smiled and shook her head, hopping up onto the rocking washing machine to stop it’s clattering and trying not to think about the fact that it probably needed replaced, You’re taking a double load for your major and I know you’re helping that professor with grading this semester and you take care of the house and Dawn and me… you’re kind of like a superhero.
I didn’t mean to lash out at Dawn today… I was just so tired.
She’s already forgiven you.
Sometimes I think I’m really bad at it.
Bad at something? You? Only mini-golf and Monopoly because you’re too nice.
I’m terrible at plenty of things.
Buffy pulled her close, hands possessive but gentle on her hips, knees gripping her thighs. No one asked you to do all this. It was unfair of me to let you move in so soon after…
Shut your Slayer face. I wanted to help.
You didn’t sign up to be a mom.
I signed up for a lot when I fell in love with you.
Not this… I’m putting too much pressure on you, it’s too much.
Above their heads, thunder crashed through the sky, shaking the foundation around them.
Sometimes… Sometimes I just need a break. We’re supposed to be college students living in a dorm and eating microwave noodles and staying up until midnight watching bad tv.
Buffy pressed a kiss to her cheek, I want to implement a ‘Tara’s Selfish Day’ - once a week you get to do whatever you want and Dawn and I will wait on you hand and foot.
Tara shook her head. We’ll never commit to that.
Buffy laughed bitterly, Probably it’d get pushed back because of an apocalypse or something every time we try.
They stayed silent for a moment, each lost in their own thoughts, Buffy’s fingers tapping on Tara’s hips and Tara leaning against the machine between her legs, head tilted to the side and looking past her shoulder.
What are you thinking?
I think that empty box of fabric softener from five years ago can probably be thrown out now.
I was thinking that maybe I should drop one of my classes. I don’t really need physics.
Don’t drop a class. We’ll figure it out.
Really?
But not today. Today my hand hurts and you are wet and Dawn is flunking two classes and I burned down the kitchen. Today we pout in front of the tv with ice cream.
Xander has been dying to get his carpenter hands on the kitchen anyway.
It’s just that…
What?
We’re out of ice cream. So I’m going to be a terrible person and tell you to go out in the storm and buy me some. But I’ll lend you my car keys if that helps.
You trust me with your car?
Not even a little bit, Tara sighed and pressed a kiss to Buffy’s lips softly. But I really want ice cream and you kinda owe me. From the top of the stairs Tara called down, Also French fries.
Buffy ran up the stairs and tackled her, carrying her to the couch and throwing her down with a grin, Okay French fries.
Can I have some? Dawn’s small voice came from the top of the stairs.
Go to bed Dawn! they both shouted up the stairs in unison.
Tara cringed at the sound of the door slamming above, I really shouldn’t still be so annoyed with her.
Buffy grabbed the car keys and headed towards the door, I know, it’s almost like you’re human or something.
She just avoided being hit in the head with a pillow as she ducked back into the storm.
fandom: btvs
pairing: buffy/tara; dawn
recipient: : red_satin_doll for the October meme
word count: 1860
prompt: thunder/courage; tara being as flawed and human, not a golden goddess of perfect wisdom and forgiveness; keyverse okay
setting: : sometime in the s6/7 range; domesticity abounds
a/n: if the characterization seems a bit off, it's probably because the only way i can conceptualize buffy in a long-term relationship with tara is if she is a much softer and more open sort of person
[Bad at something? You? Only mini-golf and Monopoly because you're too nice.]Buffy ran home from patrol through a thunderstorm, colliding through the door a soaking mess to the smell of something burning.
Damnit, Dawn, she muttered under her breath, stripping out of her jacket and shoes at the door. Dawn?! she called up the stairs, still dripping on the doormat.
Already in bed, Buff. Tara’s voice came from the kitchen, muffled and out of breath.
Anyone else here?
Just me… Tara’s voice trailed off and Buffy can’t hear the rest of her statement, but it’s the answer she wants.
On the mat, she deposits her jeans, socks, t-shirt, and cardigan in a soaking heap, wandering to the kitchen in her underwear and an old camisole she had put on to keep her warm and not at all for its fashion - the damn thing had a large brown stain that Buffy hoped was hot chocolate or the remains of a burrito, but sneakingly knew must be blood or demonic goop from some long-forgotten skirmish.
Leaving behind moist footprints and little droplets of water from her hair and shirt, Buffy made her way to the kitchen and the foul stench.
What did Dawn burn this time? Buffy started before gasping. The drapes above the sink were blackened and there was a heavy smell of smoke all through the kitchen, Tara was sitting in a mess of soggy paper towels and what looked like a broken bowl on the floor, nursing a hand that was bright red.
It wasn’t Dawn, Tara said before Buffy could whirl out of the room and lash into her sister. She sighed. It was my fault. I burned dinner, threw it in the sink and the curtains caught fire and then I dropped the salad bowl and stubbed my toe and burned my hand and then…
Tara stopped as if there was something far worse that she didn’t want Buffy to know. Buffy knelt gingerly on the ground next to her, carefully brushing away the larger pieces of broken ceramic. It’s okay. Whatever it is, it’s okay.
Tara looked up at her, eyes full of tears, And then I yelled at Dawn and sent her to bed without dinner.
Buffy stared for a minute, unable to say anything, still taking in the general upheaval around her.
I’m terrible, aren’t I? I’m the worst. Tara’s lip quivered.
I just can’t believe that Dawn just… went to bed! How long ago was this?
About thirty minutes or so.
And she didn’t fight with you at all?
Tara shook her head, fresh tears falling down her face. I think I scared her. Oh! Buffy! Poor Dawn! I didn’t mean to lose my temper like that.
Hey, it’s okay. I yell at her all the time.
She’s going to hate me now.
She’s fifteen, she’ll get over it. And she loves you. You hung the moon in the sky just for her.
Tara rubbed her nose with the back of her hand and sniffed. I was going to take up a sandwich or something… but my hand… she gestured helplessly.
I’ll make a sandwich and take it up, but first let’s bandage that hand okay?
The next few minutes were relatively quiet. Buffy got the first aid kit from under the sink and applied the right ointments and wrapped Tara’s hand delicately. Then Tara swept up the ceramic with a wave of her hand and sheepish shrug. While Buffy made Dawn a sandwich (peanut butter and salami), Tara put milk, chocolate syrup, and a banana in the blender. The banana looked like it was on its last leg, but Dawn wouldn’t notice. Buffy grabbed a bag of chips from the pantry and took the plate and cup up to Dawn.
She knocked mostly because her hands were full.
Why are you naked?
I was wet. Here, have some dinner. Buffy put the sandwich, chips, and smoothie on Dawn’s desk. You okay?
Dawn shrugged, I’m really sorry. You didn’t have to bring this up.
Why are you sorry?
Dawn sighed loudly and handed her sister a paper from her bed, wrinkled and official looking. I’m failing Geometry.
And PE?
Yeah, okay. And PE.
Buffy stared down at the paper in her hand, suddenly feeling a wave of exhaustion settling on her shoulders.
I’m really sorry, Buffy. I’ll ask for extra credit and maybe Willow can tutor me and I promise not to ditch PE anymore even if my teacher smells and is always picking on me.
Buffy set the paper down on the desk next to the sandwich and shook her head. We’ll talk about it in the morning. I don’t want to put any pressure on Willow…
Dawn threw herself into Buffy, hugging her hard and sniffling, Tara hates me, doesn’t she?
What?!
She got a call from the school and I promised her that I wouldn’t be any trouble this year and I really am sorry and it’s all my fault the kitchen burned down I said I would watch the stove and I didn’t because I -
Dawn stop. Buffy roughly pushed Dawn into her desk chair and then smoothed back her long hair gently as if to make up for lurching out of the hug that her sister so desperately seemed to need, We’ll talk about it in the morning. Tara doesn’t hate you. I’m tired. Please eat your sandwich and do your homework and then sleep okay?
Dawn wiped her eyes and nodded.
At the door, Buffy looked back at her dejected sister moping in her chair, Tara isn’t mad at you, okay? I promise. She loves you.
I just… I don’t want anyone else to leave.
The haunted look in Dawn’s face made Buffy feel old - so old. She was much too young to be responsible for something so young and so fragile.
No one is leaving tonight, it’s too wet outside.
After throwing on a pair of sweats and a mostly-clean shirt, Buffy made her way back downstairs, finding Tara starting a load of laundry in the basement. I could have done that.
You and Dawn needed to talk. And if I had left the clothes there any longer something was going to start growing on them. Did you swim home?
Buffy laughed and hugged Tara from behind. Are you okay?
Tara sighed and leaned into Buffy, It was like an epic day from hell. I almost called in the troops to do research. Like, surely a day can’t be this bad without there being something supernatural at work.
What happened?
What didn’t happen?! Tara banged the lid of the washer closed and drew away from Buffy to pace across the basement. Dawn was late to school and then I was late to my first class and the professor called me on the carpet like I was some kind of delinquent. I spilled coffee on my jeans. I got a C on a paper I was sure I aced. I noticed a piece of lettuce stuck in my teeth at least two hours after I ate lunch and I had a meeting with my advisor in the meantime. And then I nearly burned down the kitchen and yelled at Dawn for no reason.
Buffy let the silence sink for a moment before she said cheerfully, Dawn thinks this is all because she’s failing Geometry.
And PE, Tara said sullenly. I should have noticed.
Why should YOU have noticed? I’m her sister and I didn’t have a clue.
Tara shrugged, You’re busy.
Buffy smiled and shook her head, hopping up onto the rocking washing machine to stop it’s clattering and trying not to think about the fact that it probably needed replaced, You’re taking a double load for your major and I know you’re helping that professor with grading this semester and you take care of the house and Dawn and me… you’re kind of like a superhero.
I didn’t mean to lash out at Dawn today… I was just so tired.
She’s already forgiven you.
Sometimes I think I’m really bad at it.
Bad at something? You? Only mini-golf and Monopoly because you’re too nice.
I’m terrible at plenty of things.
Buffy pulled her close, hands possessive but gentle on her hips, knees gripping her thighs. No one asked you to do all this. It was unfair of me to let you move in so soon after…
Shut your Slayer face. I wanted to help.
You didn’t sign up to be a mom.
I signed up for a lot when I fell in love with you.
Not this… I’m putting too much pressure on you, it’s too much.
Above their heads, thunder crashed through the sky, shaking the foundation around them.
Sometimes… Sometimes I just need a break. We’re supposed to be college students living in a dorm and eating microwave noodles and staying up until midnight watching bad tv.
Buffy pressed a kiss to her cheek, I want to implement a ‘Tara’s Selfish Day’ - once a week you get to do whatever you want and Dawn and I will wait on you hand and foot.
Tara shook her head. We’ll never commit to that.
Buffy laughed bitterly, Probably it’d get pushed back because of an apocalypse or something every time we try.
They stayed silent for a moment, each lost in their own thoughts, Buffy’s fingers tapping on Tara’s hips and Tara leaning against the machine between her legs, head tilted to the side and looking past her shoulder.
What are you thinking?
I think that empty box of fabric softener from five years ago can probably be thrown out now.
I was thinking that maybe I should drop one of my classes. I don’t really need physics.
Don’t drop a class. We’ll figure it out.
Really?
But not today. Today my hand hurts and you are wet and Dawn is flunking two classes and I burned down the kitchen. Today we pout in front of the tv with ice cream.
Xander has been dying to get his carpenter hands on the kitchen anyway.
It’s just that…
What?
We’re out of ice cream. So I’m going to be a terrible person and tell you to go out in the storm and buy me some. But I’ll lend you my car keys if that helps.
You trust me with your car?
Not even a little bit, Tara sighed and pressed a kiss to Buffy’s lips softly. But I really want ice cream and you kinda owe me. From the top of the stairs Tara called down, Also French fries.
Buffy ran up the stairs and tackled her, carrying her to the couch and throwing her down with a grin, Okay French fries.
Can I have some? Dawn’s small voice came from the top of the stairs.
Go to bed Dawn! they both shouted up the stairs in unison.
Tara cringed at the sound of the door slamming above, I really shouldn’t still be so annoyed with her.
Buffy grabbed the car keys and headed towards the door, I know, it’s almost like you’re human or something.
She just avoided being hit in the head with a pillow as she ducked back into the storm.