Comments | kuonji14: SG-1 Fic: All Over But The Crying, by kuonji (NC-17)

kuonji14

SG-1 Fic: All Over But The Crying, by kuonji (NC-17)

Jun 11, 2007 22:57

Title: All Over But The Crying (sequel to Closeted and ...Waiting 00:00:00)
Author: kuonji
Fandom: Stargate SG-1
Characters: Jack O'Neill, Daniel Jackson, George Hammond, McKenzie, Teal'c, Janet Frasier, Samantha Carter
Pairings: Daniel/Jack
Category: dark, angst
Rating: NC-17
Warnings: non-con, italics!
Spoilers: vague for Need
Words: ~9160
Summary: ( Read more... )

type: fanfic, series: closeted, fandom: sg-1, slash?: yes

Comments 38

tresa_cho June 15 2007, 06:14:54 UTC

0.o

Amazing.

kuonji14 June 15 2007, 07:53:39 UTC

Thanks bunches! ;)

sidlj June 17 2007, 22:02:57 UTC

Wow. Love the format you put this in, with the onset of it all running backwards and the resolution running forwards. I'm definitely going to re-read in the order you suggested, plus I think I'll throw in the other two stories as well. Now that I know what caused Jack's behavior and Daniel's conviction that he was going to regain his senses, I want to look at those two stories with new eyes.

I see lots of folks asking for one more chapter - and I think I remember that you dread the idea of writing a "bad" sequel? I certainly wouldn't kick a sequel out of bed for eating crackers *g*, but I'm completely satisfied with the way this story leaves things. The symbolism of the proffered hand is lovely. :-)

kuonji14 June 19 2007, 07:03:17 UTC

Thank you! Your thoughtful comments are wonderfully encouraging. :) I'm glad you thought that this part ended well where it did. I like to think that Jack does usually understand what Daniel is saying; he just chooses to ignore it (ziggurat!). So he would know what Daniel's trying to say, and he can go along with it; he just doesn't have to agree with it ( ... )

spacemonkeyphd2 June 21 2007, 18:20:10 UTC

WOW, wonderful story. I wasn't too sure about the first one but felt compelled to read the next chapter, I HAD to know what happened next. You captured the personalities perfectly and the expected reactions. I was a little creeped out by Not-Jack to be honest and had visions of a wierd naked Jack in a silk house coat telling Daniel to 'rub the lotion on it's skin':). You write wonderfuly and the format of this last installment was great, the gradual reveal worked really well.

I'd love to read the next part if you do write it, but I think that it does end well as it stands. The offered hand and the note to Jack say everything they need to. Thank you for sharing.

kuonji14 June 23 2007, 00:04:55 UTC

Thanks so much for sticking around and for commenting. :)

You captured the personalities perfectly

Oo, nice tingles! Characterization is always the top priority for me. I'm glad they seemed to read well for you even in this whacked-out setting. I'm glad the format worked out well, too, and that you found the ending stand-alone, yay!

The offered hand and the note to Jack say everything they need to.

dhae_knight said above that the note shows that Daniel is already working to find a fix to the situation. Although that hadn't been exactly my intent (I just instinctively thought that it was something Daniel would do), I'm really glad that Daniel's presence was well-felt. Even though this is Jack's story, Daniel does have a lot of influence on him -- now more than ever before. I think if Daniel's careful and a little bit wily, he can use that to mend their relationship. :)

visions of a wierd naked Jack in a silk house coat telling Daniel to 'rub the lotion on it's skin'ohhh, now you've done it. Now I have that stuck in my head as ( ... )

spacemonkeyphd2 June 24 2007, 21:46:02 UTC

Ooooh if the manip does appear let me know, I'd love a good giggle!! :)

kuonji14 June 26 2007, 22:21:11 UTC

*G Sure thing! Any takers? :D

zats_clear June 27 2007, 03:49:38 UTC

this was fantastic. and creepy. and really fantastic. *slinks off to comtemplate fic freakout happening in brain*

kuonji14 June 28 2007, 00:32:05 UTC

gee, thanks! :D Remember, fic freakout builds character. *laughs evilly*

anonymous June 30 2007, 20:56:40 UTC

I like that you gave a closet description. However, a couple of details confused me. I thought I read a description of Jack stretched out next to Daniel, but that is not possible in a 5x5 closet. Even given the longer diagonal there is not an area wide and long enough to accommodate two 6 foot+ men. Maybe I only imagined that you described such. Also Daniel thinks the ceiling is half a foot taller than his head, which a big difference from a 2 foot difference. He would not misjudge 24 inches as 6 inches.

Good job presenting your ideas and creating atmosphere.

anonymous June 30 2007, 21:49:51 UTC

And if it really as you said italiocs backwards etc that is *very* creative. And is part of what made your style so effective

kuonji14 July 4 2007, 05:37:54 UTC

Oh yikes, you're right. Thanks for the catch! I meant for the closet to be a bit under seven feet tall. I don't know what I was thinking when I wrote eight. :P But no, although they lay down together at one point and Daniel is laid out on the floor at another, neither of them are able to stretch out; I was very careful about that. :)

lol, and yes, the italics really do run backwards, chronologically. I'm glad it was effective for you even without realizing. ;) Thanks for the comment!