tennis slash - The International Diner (14)
Title: The International Diner (14) - COMPLETE
Author: Kris S.
Fandom: Tennis RPS
Pairings: Andy Roddick/Marat Safin/Roger Federer, Lleyton Hewitt/Andy Murray
Other Players: John Isner, Marin Cilic, The Four F’s (Juan Carlos Ferrero, Feliciano Lopez, Fernando Verdasco, David Ferrer)
Rating: PG-13
Disclaimer: This did not happen.
Summary: AU. ATP in a diner.
Author’s Note: Consider this the epilogue. I have in mind a few odds and ends to add so don’t be surprised if there is more of the diner.
Chapter 14 - Getting Back at the Florist
Roger wasn't going to originally set foot in the diner that day but he is curious as to the fallout from the party. He isn't surprised to see Marin working - Andy had mentioned having him on standby - but is shocked to see Lleyton.
Roger strolls over. "How you feeling?"
Lleyton tilts his head toward Marin. "It's a nice quiet day."
"Sam surrendered?"
"Yeah." Lleyton smiles brightly. "He won't soon forget this one."
Roger quirks an eyebrow. "What did you do?"
"I did nothing. Andy put thoughts in his head that were, in his opinion, stomach-churning."
Andy Roddick enters the kitchen, placing orders for the cooks. Roger grins, needing to point out immediately, "You just couldn't resist twisting Sam around in order to win the money."
"Something like that," Roddick replies carefully, using Lleyton to gauge what Roger knows. He decides to jump right in and say it. "Although, new game. Sam thinks Lley and Other Andy are having a secret torrid affair... so keep that going until further notice."
"What?!" Roger turns sharply to Lleyton, who is too stunned to react, then to Roddick. "How the hell did you come up with that one?"
Piecing together that Roger really doesn’t know details, Roddick says cryptically, "Timing is everything." Marin has plates ready so Roddick takes them out of the kitchen.
"Now, the truth. There is no way Murray would ever agree to that prank."
Lleyton turns to the pancakes, seeing they're ready to flip. "Not a prank. They caught us kissing." He doesn't want to see Roger's reaction, so then focuses on the muffins ready to come out of the oven. "But it's not as seedy as Sam thinks. It was Murray's idea to treat it as a prank for Sam's benefit."
Marin is staring at Lleyton, floored by that admission. He squeaks out, “What did you say?"
The owner is equally baffled. "You were so drunk to do that yet that convinced Sam he was the drunkest?"
Lleyton says with determination, "No! That happened this morning at opening. Hangovers, not drunkenness. Clearheaded."
Marin mutters, "Wow."
Roger glances to John, who nods to confirm everything Lleyton just said. "I cannot believe you guys corrupted another one. Bad enough that Marat is teaching Novak bartending skills and Gilles will gladly sample the results, but I thought Andy was safe." Pointing to Marin, Roger continues, "Can you stay away from him, please?"
"Well, Mario might beg to differ..."
Roger shakes his head. "Don't even joke about that, Lley."
* * * * *
Marat nods as three of the Four F's arrive at the diner entrance around lunchtime. He’s glad in this moment to have agreed to work the lunch shift today in exchange for Novak dealing with the evening crew the next two nights. Otherwise, he would have missed whatever Andy Roddick had in mind for Juan Carlos.
He observes that apparently Fernando and Feliciano are back on-again, if the fact that the normally fashion-conscious Feliciano's wrinkled white shirt is any indication. Ferrer just looks uncomfortable with them - considering their fourth is missing and what the young man has probably seen today of the other two, Marat isn't surprised.
Marat wishes he didn’t know what he knew about the fourth’s attempt at finding out if he was single. It would be funny that Juan Carlos inadvertently got fixed up with Andy Murray when he just wanted to know if Andy Roddick was still with Marat - if Marat didn’t have to be in the middle yet not supposed to know any of it.
One would imagine Juan Carlos isn’t exactly spreading that mistake around but cannot let him forget about it, either. Yet they’re all taken by surprise when Roddick strolls over with a wide smile on his face. "Why, good morning, amigos."
Fernando is the only one of the crew to voice that suspicion. "Are you okay?"
Feliciano says in Spanish, "Maybe he's finally interested in that three-way Juanqui proposed."
Ferrer glares at Feliciano but Marat just laughs at the idea. He doesn't mean to laugh but he knows if Roddick had any clue what he said, he'd be steaming right now instead of fake-smiling.
Andy continues, "Oh, I am wonderful. Satisfecho, even. Someone is missing." Marat doesn’t know exactly what angle is being played here but Roddick loves the mind games and using the little bit of Spanish he knows, with the proper accent he’s likely been practicing no less, seems like part of the game.
The guys don't seem to think it's too odd at all. Fernando says, "He's parking the car."
Andy continues, "I can't wait to see him. Here, let me lead you to a table." Marat watches as Andy at least knows enough to not have them in his own section, because that would definitely cause suspicion beyond the newly-reacquired Spanish skills.
Marat chases after Andy as he heads to the kitchen but waits until they're away from the public to ask, "What are you doing?"
"I want to see how deep a hole Juan Carlos can dig. Now, unfortunately, my Spanish sucks so I need you and Murray to help me. Do as much eavesdropping as possible after I hit them with the shot."
Marat decides to offer, "Does it help that Feliciano wondered if you were interested in the threesome proposal?"
"Immensely." Roddick rushes to catch Murray as soon as he opens the door. Not allowing a chance for the Brit to speak before saying, "Can you keep a straight face if you know I'm telling an outright lie?"
Murray asks, "About?"
"The Blind Date Fiasco? The thing is, they'll probably give more information in Spanish, as they're prone to do when insulting us. But I need you to shut up about the real story. I doubt Ferrero will outright mention it but they are talking threesome so let’s see him sweat."
"I'm sure I'm going to hate this but go ahead." Murray has to admit he's curious, having never been involved in Roddick's scheming - that's usually Mardy's position. He peeks out, spotting the quartet in his section. He grumbles, “Just great,” then walks out.
Lleyton points out, “When Roger finds out…” He’s not sure if Roger is even in the building at the moment, but it doesn’t matter. “This is a very questionable plan.”
Roddick snaps, “You don’t get a cent of the pool until the end of the shift. I could call Sam and say you were still drunk this morning when you kissed Other Andy,” pointing to the still-swinging door.
Marat mutters, “That’s definitely more believable, anyway.”
* * * * *
Juan Carlos grins brightly upon seeing Murray. “Why, good morning, Young Andy.”
Andy just glares at him before asking the table, “Do you know what you want?”
Juan Carlos says in Spanish, “I know what, or I should say who, he wants. So clear.”
Fernando is giving his order, which Murray is writing down, as Feliciano asks Juan Carlos, “What, or should I say who, do you mean?”
Roddick emerges from the kitchen at that point, having gotten a quick translation from Marat about what they just said, to answer, “Oh, it’s so obvious. Your friend Juan Carlos wants to join Marat and myself. I mean, it is flattering but I’m not so interested in sharing.”
Ferrer has just finished with his order but he’s staring at Juan Carlos in wide-eyed shock. “Excuse me?”
Roddick watches as Marat returns to his position at the entrance, then continues, “Oh yeah. We have a mutual friend Ana and, though she meant well, probably didn’t exactly understand the question.”
Feliciano raises an eyebrow, facing Roddick. “You understand Spanish?” The rest of the table does not notice Juan Carlos is fuming over the information Roddick just revealed.
“Well, Marat is a very good teacher. I’m improving on comprehension.” Roddick gives Juan Carlos a wide smile. He cannot afford to see if Murray has given this away yet.
“I see,” Feliciano says. Then, in Spanish, he asks Juan Carlos, “How do you know what he wants?” pointing to Roddick. “Sure, he’s pretty but…”
Murray says through clenched teeth to Roddick, “Say ‘gracias’.”
Roddick repeats robotically, “Gracias” then looks up to see Murray watching him incredulously so Roddick mouths, “What?”
Feliciano finishes, “but he’s no Russian god…” He stops speaking at that point, having finally caught what Roddick said, and he, Fernando and Ferrer turn to the waiters.
“Your order, sir?” Murray says rudely to Juan Carlos, snapping him out of his confusion.
Juan Carlos does a double take, then reads off the menu, “East Side Omelette, no cheese.” The three friends have turned their focus back to him, so Juan Carlos faces Roddick to admit, “Okay, if you must know, I was curious regarding Marat but I know you’re attached to him…”
Murray interrupts to ask, “Toast?”
“Whole grain, jelly only. But I was hoping you’d consider it, Andy.”
Roddick raises an eyebrow. “Nooo. You're hoping Marat dumps me, probably during the event, no less.”
While Feliciano and Fernando are still entertained by Juan Carlos and Roddick, Ferrer has looked toward Marat and realizes there’s something fishy about this entire thing. He calls out, “Hold on. I have a test for everyone.” In Spanish, Ferrer says rather loudly, “Andy does not like you. He thinks you’re rude.”
Marat can hear that one clear, even from his post, and begins laughing. No denial from Roddick, however, who isn’t sure whether he should be laughing or not. Murray stays focused on Juan Carlos, daring him to say something, so is unable to help Roddick out.
Juan Carlos simply replies, “Is that true?” not exactly sure what he wants to hear.
None of them see Roger, who had been perched at the counter with his head resting down, until he turns around and approaches the table to answer, “Yes, both Andys dislike you, though only one knows what you said and it’s not the one who’s talking threesomes. I dislike you, especially for this. He,” pointing over to Marat, “is enjoying the show while he,” pointing to Ferrer, “wishes you wouldn’t waste your time with this impossible mission when he’s sitting right next to you, wanting you to look his way. This is giving me such a headache.” Roger shakes his head, then turns to Roddick, who is as stunned as the guests. “Oh, honey. I know all. Haven’t you learned that by now?” then leans over to kiss Roddick on the cheek before saying to Juan Carlos, “If you ever try that stunt again, sir, I will string you outside like a piñata.”
Roddick stares as Roger retreats to the kitchen, then mumbles, “Roger called me honey? Must still be drunk.” He then turns his head as he realizes Murray is using the notepad to hide that he’s laughing. “You would.”
Marat shouts out, “Oh honey, get over it.”
Murray shakes his head, regaining his composure. He stares down at the notepad, mumbling, “John is right - this place is an insane asylum.” He then tries to recite the order but it is difficult to read, so he says to Roddick, “Your handwriting is contagious.”
Roddick can’t help but laugh at the sudden seriousness in Murray’s tone, then shouts out for all to hear, “Welcome to the International Diner!”
the end
Author: Kris S.
Fandom: Tennis RPS
Pairings: Andy Roddick/Marat Safin/Roger Federer, Lleyton Hewitt/Andy Murray
Other Players: John Isner, Marin Cilic, The Four F’s (Juan Carlos Ferrero, Feliciano Lopez, Fernando Verdasco, David Ferrer)
Rating: PG-13
Disclaimer: This did not happen.
Summary: AU. ATP in a diner.
Author’s Note: Consider this the epilogue. I have in mind a few odds and ends to add so don’t be surprised if there is more of the diner.
Chapter 14 - Getting Back at the Florist
Roger wasn't going to originally set foot in the diner that day but he is curious as to the fallout from the party. He isn't surprised to see Marin working - Andy had mentioned having him on standby - but is shocked to see Lleyton.
Roger strolls over. "How you feeling?"
Lleyton tilts his head toward Marin. "It's a nice quiet day."
"Sam surrendered?"
"Yeah." Lleyton smiles brightly. "He won't soon forget this one."
Roger quirks an eyebrow. "What did you do?"
"I did nothing. Andy put thoughts in his head that were, in his opinion, stomach-churning."
Andy Roddick enters the kitchen, placing orders for the cooks. Roger grins, needing to point out immediately, "You just couldn't resist twisting Sam around in order to win the money."
"Something like that," Roddick replies carefully, using Lleyton to gauge what Roger knows. He decides to jump right in and say it. "Although, new game. Sam thinks Lley and Other Andy are having a secret torrid affair... so keep that going until further notice."
"What?!" Roger turns sharply to Lleyton, who is too stunned to react, then to Roddick. "How the hell did you come up with that one?"
Piecing together that Roger really doesn’t know details, Roddick says cryptically, "Timing is everything." Marin has plates ready so Roddick takes them out of the kitchen.
"Now, the truth. There is no way Murray would ever agree to that prank."
Lleyton turns to the pancakes, seeing they're ready to flip. "Not a prank. They caught us kissing." He doesn't want to see Roger's reaction, so then focuses on the muffins ready to come out of the oven. "But it's not as seedy as Sam thinks. It was Murray's idea to treat it as a prank for Sam's benefit."
Marin is staring at Lleyton, floored by that admission. He squeaks out, “What did you say?"
The owner is equally baffled. "You were so drunk to do that yet that convinced Sam he was the drunkest?"
Lleyton says with determination, "No! That happened this morning at opening. Hangovers, not drunkenness. Clearheaded."
Marin mutters, "Wow."
Roger glances to John, who nods to confirm everything Lleyton just said. "I cannot believe you guys corrupted another one. Bad enough that Marat is teaching Novak bartending skills and Gilles will gladly sample the results, but I thought Andy was safe." Pointing to Marin, Roger continues, "Can you stay away from him, please?"
"Well, Mario might beg to differ..."
Roger shakes his head. "Don't even joke about that, Lley."
* * * * *
Marat nods as three of the Four F's arrive at the diner entrance around lunchtime. He’s glad in this moment to have agreed to work the lunch shift today in exchange for Novak dealing with the evening crew the next two nights. Otherwise, he would have missed whatever Andy Roddick had in mind for Juan Carlos.
He observes that apparently Fernando and Feliciano are back on-again, if the fact that the normally fashion-conscious Feliciano's wrinkled white shirt is any indication. Ferrer just looks uncomfortable with them - considering their fourth is missing and what the young man has probably seen today of the other two, Marat isn't surprised.
Marat wishes he didn’t know what he knew about the fourth’s attempt at finding out if he was single. It would be funny that Juan Carlos inadvertently got fixed up with Andy Murray when he just wanted to know if Andy Roddick was still with Marat - if Marat didn’t have to be in the middle yet not supposed to know any of it.
One would imagine Juan Carlos isn’t exactly spreading that mistake around but cannot let him forget about it, either. Yet they’re all taken by surprise when Roddick strolls over with a wide smile on his face. "Why, good morning, amigos."
Fernando is the only one of the crew to voice that suspicion. "Are you okay?"
Feliciano says in Spanish, "Maybe he's finally interested in that three-way Juanqui proposed."
Ferrer glares at Feliciano but Marat just laughs at the idea. He doesn't mean to laugh but he knows if Roddick had any clue what he said, he'd be steaming right now instead of fake-smiling.
Andy continues, "Oh, I am wonderful. Satisfecho, even. Someone is missing." Marat doesn’t know exactly what angle is being played here but Roddick loves the mind games and using the little bit of Spanish he knows, with the proper accent he’s likely been practicing no less, seems like part of the game.
The guys don't seem to think it's too odd at all. Fernando says, "He's parking the car."
Andy continues, "I can't wait to see him. Here, let me lead you to a table." Marat watches as Andy at least knows enough to not have them in his own section, because that would definitely cause suspicion beyond the newly-reacquired Spanish skills.
Marat chases after Andy as he heads to the kitchen but waits until they're away from the public to ask, "What are you doing?"
"I want to see how deep a hole Juan Carlos can dig. Now, unfortunately, my Spanish sucks so I need you and Murray to help me. Do as much eavesdropping as possible after I hit them with the shot."
Marat decides to offer, "Does it help that Feliciano wondered if you were interested in the threesome proposal?"
"Immensely." Roddick rushes to catch Murray as soon as he opens the door. Not allowing a chance for the Brit to speak before saying, "Can you keep a straight face if you know I'm telling an outright lie?"
Murray asks, "About?"
"The Blind Date Fiasco? The thing is, they'll probably give more information in Spanish, as they're prone to do when insulting us. But I need you to shut up about the real story. I doubt Ferrero will outright mention it but they are talking threesome so let’s see him sweat."
"I'm sure I'm going to hate this but go ahead." Murray has to admit he's curious, having never been involved in Roddick's scheming - that's usually Mardy's position. He peeks out, spotting the quartet in his section. He grumbles, “Just great,” then walks out.
Lleyton points out, “When Roger finds out…” He’s not sure if Roger is even in the building at the moment, but it doesn’t matter. “This is a very questionable plan.”
Roddick snaps, “You don’t get a cent of the pool until the end of the shift. I could call Sam and say you were still drunk this morning when you kissed Other Andy,” pointing to the still-swinging door.
Marat mutters, “That’s definitely more believable, anyway.”
* * * * *
Juan Carlos grins brightly upon seeing Murray. “Why, good morning, Young Andy.”
Andy just glares at him before asking the table, “Do you know what you want?”
Juan Carlos says in Spanish, “I know what, or I should say who, he wants. So clear.”
Fernando is giving his order, which Murray is writing down, as Feliciano asks Juan Carlos, “What, or should I say who, do you mean?”
Roddick emerges from the kitchen at that point, having gotten a quick translation from Marat about what they just said, to answer, “Oh, it’s so obvious. Your friend Juan Carlos wants to join Marat and myself. I mean, it is flattering but I’m not so interested in sharing.”
Ferrer has just finished with his order but he’s staring at Juan Carlos in wide-eyed shock. “Excuse me?”
Roddick watches as Marat returns to his position at the entrance, then continues, “Oh yeah. We have a mutual friend Ana and, though she meant well, probably didn’t exactly understand the question.”
Feliciano raises an eyebrow, facing Roddick. “You understand Spanish?” The rest of the table does not notice Juan Carlos is fuming over the information Roddick just revealed.
“Well, Marat is a very good teacher. I’m improving on comprehension.” Roddick gives Juan Carlos a wide smile. He cannot afford to see if Murray has given this away yet.
“I see,” Feliciano says. Then, in Spanish, he asks Juan Carlos, “How do you know what he wants?” pointing to Roddick. “Sure, he’s pretty but…”
Murray says through clenched teeth to Roddick, “Say ‘gracias’.”
Roddick repeats robotically, “Gracias” then looks up to see Murray watching him incredulously so Roddick mouths, “What?”
Feliciano finishes, “but he’s no Russian god…” He stops speaking at that point, having finally caught what Roddick said, and he, Fernando and Ferrer turn to the waiters.
“Your order, sir?” Murray says rudely to Juan Carlos, snapping him out of his confusion.
Juan Carlos does a double take, then reads off the menu, “East Side Omelette, no cheese.” The three friends have turned their focus back to him, so Juan Carlos faces Roddick to admit, “Okay, if you must know, I was curious regarding Marat but I know you’re attached to him…”
Murray interrupts to ask, “Toast?”
“Whole grain, jelly only. But I was hoping you’d consider it, Andy.”
Roddick raises an eyebrow. “Nooo. You're hoping Marat dumps me, probably during the event, no less.”
While Feliciano and Fernando are still entertained by Juan Carlos and Roddick, Ferrer has looked toward Marat and realizes there’s something fishy about this entire thing. He calls out, “Hold on. I have a test for everyone.” In Spanish, Ferrer says rather loudly, “Andy does not like you. He thinks you’re rude.”
Marat can hear that one clear, even from his post, and begins laughing. No denial from Roddick, however, who isn’t sure whether he should be laughing or not. Murray stays focused on Juan Carlos, daring him to say something, so is unable to help Roddick out.
Juan Carlos simply replies, “Is that true?” not exactly sure what he wants to hear.
None of them see Roger, who had been perched at the counter with his head resting down, until he turns around and approaches the table to answer, “Yes, both Andys dislike you, though only one knows what you said and it’s not the one who’s talking threesomes. I dislike you, especially for this. He,” pointing over to Marat, “is enjoying the show while he,” pointing to Ferrer, “wishes you wouldn’t waste your time with this impossible mission when he’s sitting right next to you, wanting you to look his way. This is giving me such a headache.” Roger shakes his head, then turns to Roddick, who is as stunned as the guests. “Oh, honey. I know all. Haven’t you learned that by now?” then leans over to kiss Roddick on the cheek before saying to Juan Carlos, “If you ever try that stunt again, sir, I will string you outside like a piñata.”
Roddick stares as Roger retreats to the kitchen, then mumbles, “Roger called me honey? Must still be drunk.” He then turns his head as he realizes Murray is using the notepad to hide that he’s laughing. “You would.”
Marat shouts out, “Oh honey, get over it.”
Murray shakes his head, regaining his composure. He stares down at the notepad, mumbling, “John is right - this place is an insane asylum.” He then tries to recite the order but it is difficult to read, so he says to Roddick, “Your handwriting is contagious.”
Roddick can’t help but laugh at the sudden seriousness in Murray’s tone, then shouts out for all to hear, “Welcome to the International Diner!”
the end