Title: Love under Black Light (Part 10)
Title: Love under Black Light (Part 10)
Author: Dovesland
Pairing: Kradam; mentions of others
Rating: hard R. (lol ha ha made you look…..)
Notes: strong sexual content and b/d. this is not for the faint of heart nor the prudish of minds.........
Disclaimer: This is not a true story. I do not own either of them nor have I met them. This is just a little piece of my sick and twisted mind.....and my private time fantisy life........
Also a BIG OL HEAPIN THANKS to pyrosgf for betaing this for me cause I am an impatient Bitch who really wanted to get this up tonight......especially since it has been so long in coming........Pyro baby you Rocked my world tonight, and it is wonderful to find others just as bored as i am.....lolz xxoo baby!!!!
Here is the link to the other 9.5 chapters: community.livejournal.com/kradam_ai/tag/author:+dovesland
Aaaaaaaannnnnnnnnndddd....here you go darlins enjoy this 10th installment......
Kris heard his handler cursing him and Adam as he went up the stairs.
“I don’t care how ADULT they are, if they think that they can leave THIS kind of mess and expect us to fucking clean it up, then they have another thing coming. What did they do, jerk each other off to see who could cum the most? I swear I am going to….” His handler was shouting at Adam’s as Kris entered the game room.
“Going to do what?” Kris said feigning innocence and looking down at the mixture of dried milk and semen in the floor beside the pool table. “Oh shit, I forgot all about spilling that milk in here last night….. Katy called me as soon as we got home last night, and I dropped my glass of milk when we started arguing. I am so sorry Susan; by the time, that I got off the phone with her….well….spilt milk wasn’t worth crying over nor was it on my mind to clean up. I just took a shower and went straight to bed. I will clean it up. I hope the carpet isn’t ruined.” Kris said as he turned puppy dog eyes up to his handler and took a step towards the kitchen.
Susan’s demeanor changed as soon as Kris mentioned Katy. Outside of the 19 Entertainment lawyers, only a handful of people knew about the situation with Katy and his handler was one of those people. Susan had to be ready to deal with anything that came up concerning Kris, and her boss had briefed her about the divorce soon after Kris had contacted 19. Susan now felt bad for what she had said right before Kris had entered the room, and held up a hand to stop him, saying,
“No no, no Kris, I understand you don’t need to clean this up, I will get the housekeepers to do it. Is Katy still refusing to sign the last of the divorce papers?.....are you ok?”
“Yes,” he replied truthfully, “She called late last night saying that she wasn’t satisfied with her alimony percentages and wanted to renegotiate it. I heard her new boyfriend in the background yelling something about me being an uncaring bastard who hangs out with faggots and I just kinda lost it. That was when I dropped my glass of milk. After that, it became a shouting match between the three of us, and by the time I finally got off the phone, I was in the bathroom with the water running trying to calm myself. Adam tried to calm me down, but I ah hadn’t told Adam about the divorce yet and I sure didn’t want to tell him what the fight was about or what that idiot kept saying about him in the background. And well…..it just wasn’t the right time to talk about it. It was worse than having Danny and Michael back in the mansion.” Kris said.
The only thing not true was the milk and the time that Katy had called. The rest of it WAS what had gone on during the call that morning, so Kris didn’t feel too bad about lying to Susan about the milk. At least it was easier than telling her that Adam had poured the milk in the floor to cover up the cum that they had spilt when they were fucking their brains out last night in the game room. THAT, Kris felt sure, was something that he could not say to his handler. EVER!
Susan must have interpreted the worried look that had crawled onto Kris’s face as discomfort due to talking about his personal life in front of Adam’s handler, because she quickly changed the subject to the day’s scheduled events and suggested that he go get ready for his first interview. Kris started to leave when a question came to mind.
“Hey, Susan, is there any chance that Adam and I could have a quiet evening tonight? Both of us are worn to a frazzle and since he and I are such close friends, I could really use the ear for my problems with Katy. This week is going to be a wild one and I really want my head in the game. Do you think that you could arrange for us to just, eat here tonight without all the press, and people and stuff? It would really mean a lot to me?” And again Kris turned his puppy dog eyes back to Susan, hoping that it would work just one more time.
Susan wasn’t stupid, and she knew that there was something going on between the top two finalists, whether it was a Bromance or a romance she wasn’t sure, but she did know that Kris had been struggling with the situation with Katy. She also knew, that 19 Entertainment wanted both boys on top of their respective games this week, and she figured one night together without all the hype and fuss wouldn’t hurt. She looked at Adam’s handler, who shrugged her shoulders as if to say “why not” and replied,
“Ummmm it looks like you two could be done today around 5:30 pm if that is ok with the producers. I’ll make it happen. You two just get ready for your first interview, the camera crew will be here in about an hour and a half.”
Kris thanked her before he left the room, turning and giving her a look of relief and gratitude that had nothing to do with spilt milk and everything to do with her understanding. He was still reeling from the call with Katy and the knowledge that he and Adam had to have “the talk.” However, thanks to Susan, it looked like they would be spending the day together doing interviews and meetings about the upcoming finale and still have time to do so.
**************************************************************************************
Since Adam was notorious for his long showers, Kris was not surprised to find him still in theirs. He shed the bathrobe and slipped in behind him.
“Hey” he said to Adam, as he wrapped his arms around him under the hot water, “did you save any hot water for me?”
Adam turned around and embraced Kris as he answered, “Yeah sure did, you take care of our handlers? Are they gonna charge us to replace the carpet and ground us for a week?” Adam grinned mischievously as he leaned down for a quick kiss.
Kris so wanted to do nothing more than to stay right there, in Adam’s arms, snuggled up, held so close and safe, but he knew that the handlers would not wait for them to enjoy more than a shower. He returned the kiss that Adam had pulled him into, but soon ended it by pushing Adam back a bit and saying,
“As much as I would love to stay right here with you till the water turned to ice, we have less than 90 minutes before the camera crew arrives for our first set of interviews this morning. I did however manage to beg off for tonight and Susan said that after 5:30 pm we would be free to do as we pleased.”
“Do as we pleased huh?” Adam snickered, running a hand across Kris’s stomach and down to his hardening cock.
“Yes, as we please, but not till tonight,” but Adam was already stroking Kris and pulling him back towards him. Kris’s mind was all helter skelter, torn between the adult side of his brain reminding him of their time restraints and his inner child bouncing up and down with glee in time to Adam’s strokes of his cock.
“Ummm…..Can you put that beautiful face of yours on and still have time for this?” Kris said as he started to moan and thrust up into Adam’s hand. Adam grinned, sped up his strokes and replied,
“Honey, I will always have time for this. How about you… uh… give me a hand…” Kris didn’t have to be asked twice, his hand had already gravitated towards Adam’s pulsating erection. Adam leaned into capture Kris’s lips with his own, and soon the two were stroking each other in unison under the hot shower, leaving the handlers to care about the spilt milk.
***********************************************************************************************************
After the last interviews were over, and the producers had finally mapped out the finale, Adam and Kris both began to feel jittery. Adam wondered what Kris had in mind for their evening. He knew that they were finally going to discuss the situation between them, but he wasn’t sure how Kris was going to explain the divorce. Adam knew that things were strained between Kris and Katy, and that it had been that way for a long time now, but he figured that it was just first year jitters. Well, at least until Kris had started tying Adam up in night clubs that is. Now, Adam was confused, infatuated, horny, and perhaps in love with Kris Allen. Moreover, in a few minutes, they would be talking about what had happened and where they may be heading. It scared the Beejesus out of Adam, and he knew that Kris had to be struggling with all of this as well.
As the two of them got into a cab to supposedly return to the mansion, Adam scooted close to Kris and hugged the smaller man to his chest.
“Now, my little pocket Idol, where are we off to?” Adam said almost into Kris’s hair before kissing the top of his head.
“Dinner, a few bottles of wine, and maybe a 6-Pack or two for me, while we…..talk. Sound good?” Kris replied.
“Yup,” Adam laughed, “Sounds good, but don’t you think that we should tell the driver where we are planning to eat?”
“Oh yeah,” Kris said, and raised up to rap on the Plexiglas window between them and the cabbie, “Sir, we need to go to this address, OK?” Kris said to the driver while handing him an address scrawled on the back of a torn set list. He didn’t want Adam to know where they were going until they drove up.
Kris had asked his handler to make the arrangements for him earlier while Adam was doing a round of interviews by himself. Susan had found a secluded beach where they could be alone without prying eyes, and reporters’ cameras. She had also set up dinner for them, picnic basket and all, waiting on a blanket in the sand. Whenever Kris had asked her to arrange this, Susan had figured out that the best way to go was simple, and she had done almost all of it herself to keep other people from following a trail to what may be embarrassing pictures and tabloid wet dreams. She had even handpicked their cab driver to ensure his silence in case the boys split any more “milk” after their dinner.
The cabbie nodded and winked back at Kris when he handed him the address and said, “no problem sir, I know exactly where this is,” and thanks to Susan’s earlier instructions, he did know just where to take the curious couple snuggled up in the back of his cab. **********************************************************************************************************
“So, Kris, what is all of this divorce stuff about?” Adam asked as he opened a bottle of wine and poured both of them a glass. He loved being on the beach as sun set, watching the waves lapping up the dying rays of the day, and this secluded picnic on the beach had impressed him. Adam was discovering that Kris was a master at making plans, whether it was a romantic dinner or bondage sex, Kris could make anything happen. ‘Maybe that was what had drawn us together, Kris saw something he wanted and arranged for it to fall into place,’ Adam thought as he smiled at Kris over the top of his glass. “go on then Kris, spill it….”
At Adam’s urging Kris finally cleared his throat, took a deep breath and began, “Well, we could start there I guess. Adam, I never planned for any of this to happen. I just went to an audition for American Idol, landed here, and rushed into a marriage that was destined for disaster. Katy is a wonderful woman, smart, intelligent, beautiful, and all that, but I knew even before Idol, that she wasn’t what I wanted,” with that said, Kris finally moved his eyes from some point on the horizon, to stare Adam up and down suggestively. “Adam, my life has been one big distraction. I distracted myself from the career that I wanted as a singer for years, just trying to get a college degree and a 9-5 job, you know entering the daily grind so that I would not have to try to be someone and maybe fall flat on my ass in the process.
“Then, I hooked up with the pretty girl who wanted to wait until marriage for sex instead of the high school jock who gave me my first blowjob in the locker room after gym class. Honestly, the first time Katy tried to give me head, I could not get into it until I started thinking about that strawberry blonde football player’s head bobbing up and down on my dick. I had to bite my tongue to stop from begging her to finger fuck me while she was sucking my cock after I started thinking about Tim DeLong. Damn that boy was hot.” Kris threw back his head and laughed as he remembered them almost getting caught behind the bleachers at school. ‘Yeah,’ he thought, ‘Tim was pretty hot alright, but nothing compared to the man here with me tonight.’ He leaned over, ran his fingers down Adam’s cheek and gave him a shy little kiss on the lips, then continued talking.
“Well, from there it was all embarrassing hard-ons while roughhousing with my frat brothers, being sure to lock my bedroom door while I was….ummm….you know…”Kris made a gesture with his hand like he was pumping his cock, which Adam knew meant that Kris was talking about masturbating, he laughed at the crude gesture and encouraged Kris to carry on with his story.
“Yes Kris I get it, you were jacking off to Marlboro man commercials or some other macho image instead of the playboy centerfolds plastered to your dorm room walls…..go on.” Adam said as he grinned from ear to ear. Kris locked eyes with him for a few minutes, and then he blushed and continued.
“I have fought within myself over the question of my sexuality ever since I figured out that my dick was for more than writing my name in the snow. I have been trying to shove down those feelings, laughing them off, Hell even blaming Tim a time or two, but not even marrying the pretty girl helped. I still can’t seem to be able to ignore the twists in my stomach every time a well-built man wanders into my field of vision. And then, I met you.”
Kris raised his eyes up to Adam’s again, this time; Adam could see the trust and hope behind them and what Kris was saying to him right now. Adam knew that it had taken a lot for this sweet country boy to say all of that out loud, and he was even willing to bet that it was the first time he had ever talked about this to anyone. A small part of Adam felt proud that he had affected Kris in this way, and that he was the one that Kris trusted with this, his biggest secret ever. The fact that they were lovers aside, Adam knowing that Kris was as vulnerable as the day was long and was turning to him for support and validation left Adam feeling touched and honored to say the least.
However, another part of Adam felt the guilt involved in this change in Kris. If he hadn’t met him, if he hadn’t maybe awakened within Kris these latent feelings/homosexual tendencies, then Kris would never have to face the discrimination, the battles for equality, all of the bad parts of being homosexual/bisexual/whatever. Those things Adam wished that he could shield Kris from, but he knew that it was all part of the life. All that Adam knew for sure at that moment when he looked into Kris’s eyes was that he loved Kris Allen. Adam loved him in a way that he had never loved anyone else before.
Just watching the look in Kris’s eyes now, as he kept talking about his life, about how things had never seemed to add up until he had met Adam, told Adam that Kris mirrored his own feelings, but at this moment, Adam wasn’t sure if he was good enough for a man like Kris. Adam had spent years in the gay scene in West Hollywood and had done things that would frighten most newly outed men. Adam worried about how to explain all of this to Kris, and then he remembered that this had all started by Kris tying him up in the back of a gay nightclub. ‘Hmmmmm,’ Adam thought, ‘I need to remember to ask him about all of that too….’ Then, realizing that he had wandered into his own head and that Kris was still talking, he brought his focus back to what Kris was saying to him.
“…..and then when we started getting closer, I started ignoring Katy more and more, until she finally she found solace with another man. One who has time for her, and one who gives her the attention that she deserves. I don’t really blame her, and I think that deep down she knows why I finally gave up on our marriage. I never told her about my attraction to other men, but I think deep down that she knew. Especially when I met you, and started talking nonstop about you. I didn’t have to tell her that we were…ummm….you know…..her and her new man assumed that was the reason for my waning attention, but she would never blame you for this, right now she is just blaming me even though she was cheating first….”
Kris had continued by explaining what Adam had asked him to, the divorce, and the strange contemplative look on Adam’s face was scaring Kris a bit. ‘Maybe this is all just sex to him….shit I knew I should have moved slower with this, should have built up to the sex instead of jumping at the chance to tie Adam up in that back room…..why do I always….’ Kris had continued the latter half of his conversation in his head, and hadn’t realized that Adam had moved closer to him. He jumped a little when Adam reached out for his hand.
“Shhhhhhhh shhhhhhhhh it’s ok,” Adam whispered against Kris cheek, as he drew Kris to him. “I know what you are going through, I know what it means to be lusting after the football star and still “dating” the head cheerleader. I remember my struggles, and while it may seem to some that I just popped out of my mom’s vagina singing Major Tom and turning my umbilical cord into an improvised boa, it wasn’t that neat of a little package, and I know that this was ALL hard for you to say out loud. For me, that first conversation with another human being about my being a gay man was one of the most awkward, frightening, wonderful, and liberating conversations that I have ever had in my life. Right up until this one of course……so, I am aware of how you are feeling Kris about most of this, and I want you to know that it isn’t just my cock that is being pulled towards you, my heart has come along for the ride as well…… I just hope that I haven’t destroyed your life with all of this.” Adam admitted hoping that if he had, that he could find a way to put things right without anyone getting hurt in the process, especially himself.
Adam’s mind started reeling at the realization that he had barred a bit more of his soul to Kris than he had intended to. He knew that he loved this man, but Adam wasn’t ready to say it just yet, and with everything that Kris was going through with his marriage and the show etc., he wasn’t sure if it was the time to be making declarations of Love.
While the two of them sat staring into each other’s eyes, each silently contemplating their own part in this chaos surrounding them, Adam finally heard the part of his heart that was screaming at him to just ‘shut the fuck up already, stop thinking too much and kiss the beautiful man in front of him.’ There Kris was, pouring out his heart to Adam, at the beach, in the sand, at sunset, and with that realization, Adam finally listened to his heart.
Adam cupped Kris’s face in his hands and drew their mouths together. Lips moving against one another, his tongue meeting Kris’s when he licked into his mouth. There was a passion ignited in that kiss, one that came from an emotional roller coaster that was taking both of their bodies for a ride. Adam wove his hands into Kris’s hair, trying to pull him even closer, but Kris had already moved his arms under Adam’s and had placed his hands on the back of Adam’s shoulders trying to do the same. Adam rolled them until he was lying on top of Kris and had just ground his hips into Kris’s a few times when he heard the click of a camera shutter.
Author: Dovesland
Pairing: Kradam; mentions of others
Rating: hard R. (lol ha ha made you look…..)
Notes: strong sexual content and b/d. this is not for the faint of heart nor the prudish of minds.........
Disclaimer: This is not a true story. I do not own either of them nor have I met them. This is just a little piece of my sick and twisted mind.....and my private time fantisy life........
Also a BIG OL HEAPIN THANKS to pyrosgf for betaing this for me cause I am an impatient Bitch who really wanted to get this up tonight......especially since it has been so long in coming........Pyro baby you Rocked my world tonight, and it is wonderful to find others just as bored as i am.....lolz xxoo baby!!!!
Here is the link to the other 9.5 chapters: community.livejournal.com/kradam_ai/tag/author:+dovesland
Aaaaaaaannnnnnnnnndddd....here you go darlins enjoy this 10th installment......
Kris heard his handler cursing him and Adam as he went up the stairs.
“I don’t care how ADULT they are, if they think that they can leave THIS kind of mess and expect us to fucking clean it up, then they have another thing coming. What did they do, jerk each other off to see who could cum the most? I swear I am going to….” His handler was shouting at Adam’s as Kris entered the game room.
“Going to do what?” Kris said feigning innocence and looking down at the mixture of dried milk and semen in the floor beside the pool table. “Oh shit, I forgot all about spilling that milk in here last night….. Katy called me as soon as we got home last night, and I dropped my glass of milk when we started arguing. I am so sorry Susan; by the time, that I got off the phone with her….well….spilt milk wasn’t worth crying over nor was it on my mind to clean up. I just took a shower and went straight to bed. I will clean it up. I hope the carpet isn’t ruined.” Kris said as he turned puppy dog eyes up to his handler and took a step towards the kitchen.
Susan’s demeanor changed as soon as Kris mentioned Katy. Outside of the 19 Entertainment lawyers, only a handful of people knew about the situation with Katy and his handler was one of those people. Susan had to be ready to deal with anything that came up concerning Kris, and her boss had briefed her about the divorce soon after Kris had contacted 19. Susan now felt bad for what she had said right before Kris had entered the room, and held up a hand to stop him, saying,
“No no, no Kris, I understand you don’t need to clean this up, I will get the housekeepers to do it. Is Katy still refusing to sign the last of the divorce papers?.....are you ok?”
“Yes,” he replied truthfully, “She called late last night saying that she wasn’t satisfied with her alimony percentages and wanted to renegotiate it. I heard her new boyfriend in the background yelling something about me being an uncaring bastard who hangs out with faggots and I just kinda lost it. That was when I dropped my glass of milk. After that, it became a shouting match between the three of us, and by the time I finally got off the phone, I was in the bathroom with the water running trying to calm myself. Adam tried to calm me down, but I ah hadn’t told Adam about the divorce yet and I sure didn’t want to tell him what the fight was about or what that idiot kept saying about him in the background. And well…..it just wasn’t the right time to talk about it. It was worse than having Danny and Michael back in the mansion.” Kris said.
The only thing not true was the milk and the time that Katy had called. The rest of it WAS what had gone on during the call that morning, so Kris didn’t feel too bad about lying to Susan about the milk. At least it was easier than telling her that Adam had poured the milk in the floor to cover up the cum that they had spilt when they were fucking their brains out last night in the game room. THAT, Kris felt sure, was something that he could not say to his handler. EVER!
Susan must have interpreted the worried look that had crawled onto Kris’s face as discomfort due to talking about his personal life in front of Adam’s handler, because she quickly changed the subject to the day’s scheduled events and suggested that he go get ready for his first interview. Kris started to leave when a question came to mind.
“Hey, Susan, is there any chance that Adam and I could have a quiet evening tonight? Both of us are worn to a frazzle and since he and I are such close friends, I could really use the ear for my problems with Katy. This week is going to be a wild one and I really want my head in the game. Do you think that you could arrange for us to just, eat here tonight without all the press, and people and stuff? It would really mean a lot to me?” And again Kris turned his puppy dog eyes back to Susan, hoping that it would work just one more time.
Susan wasn’t stupid, and she knew that there was something going on between the top two finalists, whether it was a Bromance or a romance she wasn’t sure, but she did know that Kris had been struggling with the situation with Katy. She also knew, that 19 Entertainment wanted both boys on top of their respective games this week, and she figured one night together without all the hype and fuss wouldn’t hurt. She looked at Adam’s handler, who shrugged her shoulders as if to say “why not” and replied,
“Ummmm it looks like you two could be done today around 5:30 pm if that is ok with the producers. I’ll make it happen. You two just get ready for your first interview, the camera crew will be here in about an hour and a half.”
Kris thanked her before he left the room, turning and giving her a look of relief and gratitude that had nothing to do with spilt milk and everything to do with her understanding. He was still reeling from the call with Katy and the knowledge that he and Adam had to have “the talk.” However, thanks to Susan, it looked like they would be spending the day together doing interviews and meetings about the upcoming finale and still have time to do so.
**************************************************************************************
Since Adam was notorious for his long showers, Kris was not surprised to find him still in theirs. He shed the bathrobe and slipped in behind him.
“Hey” he said to Adam, as he wrapped his arms around him under the hot water, “did you save any hot water for me?”
Adam turned around and embraced Kris as he answered, “Yeah sure did, you take care of our handlers? Are they gonna charge us to replace the carpet and ground us for a week?” Adam grinned mischievously as he leaned down for a quick kiss.
Kris so wanted to do nothing more than to stay right there, in Adam’s arms, snuggled up, held so close and safe, but he knew that the handlers would not wait for them to enjoy more than a shower. He returned the kiss that Adam had pulled him into, but soon ended it by pushing Adam back a bit and saying,
“As much as I would love to stay right here with you till the water turned to ice, we have less than 90 minutes before the camera crew arrives for our first set of interviews this morning. I did however manage to beg off for tonight and Susan said that after 5:30 pm we would be free to do as we pleased.”
“Do as we pleased huh?” Adam snickered, running a hand across Kris’s stomach and down to his hardening cock.
“Yes, as we please, but not till tonight,” but Adam was already stroking Kris and pulling him back towards him. Kris’s mind was all helter skelter, torn between the adult side of his brain reminding him of their time restraints and his inner child bouncing up and down with glee in time to Adam’s strokes of his cock.
“Ummm…..Can you put that beautiful face of yours on and still have time for this?” Kris said as he started to moan and thrust up into Adam’s hand. Adam grinned, sped up his strokes and replied,
“Honey, I will always have time for this. How about you… uh… give me a hand…” Kris didn’t have to be asked twice, his hand had already gravitated towards Adam’s pulsating erection. Adam leaned into capture Kris’s lips with his own, and soon the two were stroking each other in unison under the hot shower, leaving the handlers to care about the spilt milk.
***********************************************************************************************************
After the last interviews were over, and the producers had finally mapped out the finale, Adam and Kris both began to feel jittery. Adam wondered what Kris had in mind for their evening. He knew that they were finally going to discuss the situation between them, but he wasn’t sure how Kris was going to explain the divorce. Adam knew that things were strained between Kris and Katy, and that it had been that way for a long time now, but he figured that it was just first year jitters. Well, at least until Kris had started tying Adam up in night clubs that is. Now, Adam was confused, infatuated, horny, and perhaps in love with Kris Allen. Moreover, in a few minutes, they would be talking about what had happened and where they may be heading. It scared the Beejesus out of Adam, and he knew that Kris had to be struggling with all of this as well.
As the two of them got into a cab to supposedly return to the mansion, Adam scooted close to Kris and hugged the smaller man to his chest.
“Now, my little pocket Idol, where are we off to?” Adam said almost into Kris’s hair before kissing the top of his head.
“Dinner, a few bottles of wine, and maybe a 6-Pack or two for me, while we…..talk. Sound good?” Kris replied.
“Yup,” Adam laughed, “Sounds good, but don’t you think that we should tell the driver where we are planning to eat?”
“Oh yeah,” Kris said, and raised up to rap on the Plexiglas window between them and the cabbie, “Sir, we need to go to this address, OK?” Kris said to the driver while handing him an address scrawled on the back of a torn set list. He didn’t want Adam to know where they were going until they drove up.
Kris had asked his handler to make the arrangements for him earlier while Adam was doing a round of interviews by himself. Susan had found a secluded beach where they could be alone without prying eyes, and reporters’ cameras. She had also set up dinner for them, picnic basket and all, waiting on a blanket in the sand. Whenever Kris had asked her to arrange this, Susan had figured out that the best way to go was simple, and she had done almost all of it herself to keep other people from following a trail to what may be embarrassing pictures and tabloid wet dreams. She had even handpicked their cab driver to ensure his silence in case the boys split any more “milk” after their dinner.
The cabbie nodded and winked back at Kris when he handed him the address and said, “no problem sir, I know exactly where this is,” and thanks to Susan’s earlier instructions, he did know just where to take the curious couple snuggled up in the back of his cab. **********************************************************************************************************
“So, Kris, what is all of this divorce stuff about?” Adam asked as he opened a bottle of wine and poured both of them a glass. He loved being on the beach as sun set, watching the waves lapping up the dying rays of the day, and this secluded picnic on the beach had impressed him. Adam was discovering that Kris was a master at making plans, whether it was a romantic dinner or bondage sex, Kris could make anything happen. ‘Maybe that was what had drawn us together, Kris saw something he wanted and arranged for it to fall into place,’ Adam thought as he smiled at Kris over the top of his glass. “go on then Kris, spill it….”
At Adam’s urging Kris finally cleared his throat, took a deep breath and began, “Well, we could start there I guess. Adam, I never planned for any of this to happen. I just went to an audition for American Idol, landed here, and rushed into a marriage that was destined for disaster. Katy is a wonderful woman, smart, intelligent, beautiful, and all that, but I knew even before Idol, that she wasn’t what I wanted,” with that said, Kris finally moved his eyes from some point on the horizon, to stare Adam up and down suggestively. “Adam, my life has been one big distraction. I distracted myself from the career that I wanted as a singer for years, just trying to get a college degree and a 9-5 job, you know entering the daily grind so that I would not have to try to be someone and maybe fall flat on my ass in the process.
“Then, I hooked up with the pretty girl who wanted to wait until marriage for sex instead of the high school jock who gave me my first blowjob in the locker room after gym class. Honestly, the first time Katy tried to give me head, I could not get into it until I started thinking about that strawberry blonde football player’s head bobbing up and down on my dick. I had to bite my tongue to stop from begging her to finger fuck me while she was sucking my cock after I started thinking about Tim DeLong. Damn that boy was hot.” Kris threw back his head and laughed as he remembered them almost getting caught behind the bleachers at school. ‘Yeah,’ he thought, ‘Tim was pretty hot alright, but nothing compared to the man here with me tonight.’ He leaned over, ran his fingers down Adam’s cheek and gave him a shy little kiss on the lips, then continued talking.
“Well, from there it was all embarrassing hard-ons while roughhousing with my frat brothers, being sure to lock my bedroom door while I was….ummm….you know…”Kris made a gesture with his hand like he was pumping his cock, which Adam knew meant that Kris was talking about masturbating, he laughed at the crude gesture and encouraged Kris to carry on with his story.
“Yes Kris I get it, you were jacking off to Marlboro man commercials or some other macho image instead of the playboy centerfolds plastered to your dorm room walls…..go on.” Adam said as he grinned from ear to ear. Kris locked eyes with him for a few minutes, and then he blushed and continued.
“I have fought within myself over the question of my sexuality ever since I figured out that my dick was for more than writing my name in the snow. I have been trying to shove down those feelings, laughing them off, Hell even blaming Tim a time or two, but not even marrying the pretty girl helped. I still can’t seem to be able to ignore the twists in my stomach every time a well-built man wanders into my field of vision. And then, I met you.”
Kris raised his eyes up to Adam’s again, this time; Adam could see the trust and hope behind them and what Kris was saying to him right now. Adam knew that it had taken a lot for this sweet country boy to say all of that out loud, and he was even willing to bet that it was the first time he had ever talked about this to anyone. A small part of Adam felt proud that he had affected Kris in this way, and that he was the one that Kris trusted with this, his biggest secret ever. The fact that they were lovers aside, Adam knowing that Kris was as vulnerable as the day was long and was turning to him for support and validation left Adam feeling touched and honored to say the least.
However, another part of Adam felt the guilt involved in this change in Kris. If he hadn’t met him, if he hadn’t maybe awakened within Kris these latent feelings/homosexual tendencies, then Kris would never have to face the discrimination, the battles for equality, all of the bad parts of being homosexual/bisexual/whatever. Those things Adam wished that he could shield Kris from, but he knew that it was all part of the life. All that Adam knew for sure at that moment when he looked into Kris’s eyes was that he loved Kris Allen. Adam loved him in a way that he had never loved anyone else before.
Just watching the look in Kris’s eyes now, as he kept talking about his life, about how things had never seemed to add up until he had met Adam, told Adam that Kris mirrored his own feelings, but at this moment, Adam wasn’t sure if he was good enough for a man like Kris. Adam had spent years in the gay scene in West Hollywood and had done things that would frighten most newly outed men. Adam worried about how to explain all of this to Kris, and then he remembered that this had all started by Kris tying him up in the back of a gay nightclub. ‘Hmmmmm,’ Adam thought, ‘I need to remember to ask him about all of that too….’ Then, realizing that he had wandered into his own head and that Kris was still talking, he brought his focus back to what Kris was saying to him.
“…..and then when we started getting closer, I started ignoring Katy more and more, until she finally she found solace with another man. One who has time for her, and one who gives her the attention that she deserves. I don’t really blame her, and I think that deep down she knows why I finally gave up on our marriage. I never told her about my attraction to other men, but I think deep down that she knew. Especially when I met you, and started talking nonstop about you. I didn’t have to tell her that we were…ummm….you know…..her and her new man assumed that was the reason for my waning attention, but she would never blame you for this, right now she is just blaming me even though she was cheating first….”
Kris had continued by explaining what Adam had asked him to, the divorce, and the strange contemplative look on Adam’s face was scaring Kris a bit. ‘Maybe this is all just sex to him….shit I knew I should have moved slower with this, should have built up to the sex instead of jumping at the chance to tie Adam up in that back room…..why do I always….’ Kris had continued the latter half of his conversation in his head, and hadn’t realized that Adam had moved closer to him. He jumped a little when Adam reached out for his hand.
“Shhhhhhhh shhhhhhhhh it’s ok,” Adam whispered against Kris cheek, as he drew Kris to him. “I know what you are going through, I know what it means to be lusting after the football star and still “dating” the head cheerleader. I remember my struggles, and while it may seem to some that I just popped out of my mom’s vagina singing Major Tom and turning my umbilical cord into an improvised boa, it wasn’t that neat of a little package, and I know that this was ALL hard for you to say out loud. For me, that first conversation with another human being about my being a gay man was one of the most awkward, frightening, wonderful, and liberating conversations that I have ever had in my life. Right up until this one of course……so, I am aware of how you are feeling Kris about most of this, and I want you to know that it isn’t just my cock that is being pulled towards you, my heart has come along for the ride as well…… I just hope that I haven’t destroyed your life with all of this.” Adam admitted hoping that if he had, that he could find a way to put things right without anyone getting hurt in the process, especially himself.
Adam’s mind started reeling at the realization that he had barred a bit more of his soul to Kris than he had intended to. He knew that he loved this man, but Adam wasn’t ready to say it just yet, and with everything that Kris was going through with his marriage and the show etc., he wasn’t sure if it was the time to be making declarations of Love.
While the two of them sat staring into each other’s eyes, each silently contemplating their own part in this chaos surrounding them, Adam finally heard the part of his heart that was screaming at him to just ‘shut the fuck up already, stop thinking too much and kiss the beautiful man in front of him.’ There Kris was, pouring out his heart to Adam, at the beach, in the sand, at sunset, and with that realization, Adam finally listened to his heart.
Adam cupped Kris’s face in his hands and drew their mouths together. Lips moving against one another, his tongue meeting Kris’s when he licked into his mouth. There was a passion ignited in that kiss, one that came from an emotional roller coaster that was taking both of their bodies for a ride. Adam wove his hands into Kris’s hair, trying to pull him even closer, but Kris had already moved his arms under Adam’s and had placed his hands on the back of Adam’s shoulders trying to do the same. Adam rolled them until he was lying on top of Kris and had just ground his hips into Kris’s a few times when he heard the click of a camera shutter.