Comments | kpop_olymfics: Round 2: Tell me about the days when you were 17

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Round 2: Tell me about the days when you were 17

Mar 24, 2015 23:06

Title: Tell me about the days when you were 17
Team: Future
Rating: PG
Fandom: F(x)
Pairing: Luna/Krystal, Luna/Male OC
Summary: "Tell me about the days when you were 17. That's right after you debuted right? I almost couldn't believe it when I saw you on TV the first time. You'd gotten so pretty since you were eleven ( Read more... )

!fic post, fandom: f(x), cycle: 2015, team future, 2015 round 2: coin laundry

Comments 2

cassiem312 March 25 2015, 09:00:00 UTC

I feel bad about voting for this fic honestly, so here is why. I wanted to like this story - I really did. However the grammar and syntax errors threw me off. I think you had a great premise and a great story that fit the genre of future PERFECTLY - I just wish it was a little more polished.

nachtegael March 28 2015, 13:35:05 UTC

oh, so I loved the way you worked the laundry theme throughout the whole story, all the mentions of the sheets and thoughts and words that happened between them from childhood and building to the climax where Sunyoung rips up the bed. Idk, it felt so symbolic and also so tangible all at the same time <3

besides the prose (the short sentences fit really nicely, I think, they give some space to breathe), the thing I liked most was how all the themes or motifs or what I shall call them--the bridge, the ring, the palms pressed to chests--they all wove together until the end. that gave the story such a nice framework to contain all of the subtle emotions.

this is really beautiful, and I love f(x), and thank you for writing this <3