Bad Mood / Boring Rant

[kjc]

Friday was a little rough and I was tired from a long week. Stayed up later than I intended, though not as stupidly late as today (I'm still awake). But then COULD NOT WAKE UP ON SATURDAY. Not even with two kinds of alarms plus periodic nudging from the BF and random phone calls. I'm still upset about it because it meant I missed Somerville

Comments

[drwex]

Shit fuck hell pus buckets my neurons are suckweaselly pig-fuckin' puppy-kickers dammit.

Broken Galliano bottle, anyone?

(yes, I still have the whole thing in my quotes file.)

[kjc]

It's not like I didn't archive it in a public spot...

http://www.apocalypse.org/pub/u/kjc/flamage/FMH.html

[foomf]

Read back through the journal a bit - Kelly J enjoys a neurological disorder. It's not that she didn't want to do any of those things, and that line of speculation is one of the causes of frustration.

Cognitive Behavioral Therapy has little to no effect on the fatigue that is part of the disorder. Chemical supplementation does, sometimes, but for what she's got, they apparently don't know the cause so they can't tell how to mediate it.

It might, maybe, help with the depression, but mostly, depression comes from frustration that festers for too long, and in this case, the frustration is that she's got this guilt-inducing "character flaw" of being too "lazy and unfocused" because of the fatigue. For people with MS, who also get to enjoy the fatigue, it takes similar work to get past the "you do not get to 'try harder' because it won't help" but they also have the impetus of "try harder WILL make things worse and you will DIE from it."

[i_leonardo]

"Sometimes I think I got more done when I didn't understand or recognize my depression or hypersomnia and just thought I was a big fuckup who needed to try harder to compensate."

you *do* need to try harder to compensate, not because you're a big fuckup, but because you have a handicap. knowing the name can help you pre-judge potential treatment or coping options, like if your label is "paraplegic" you can know in advance that you're more prone to urinary tract infections and be extra vigilant for them, but there's no getting out of needing to work harder. *sigh*.

on the other hand

[wonderreader]

well, sorry you missed the open studios - but glad you got to the bead crochet lady.

Remember - just 'cause is doesn't have a name doesn't mean it isn't real. Although you could name it the suwepifpuk neuronal syndrome. Besides you always try harder.